Whenever his handlers used the words to trigger the Winter Soldier, the raging pain in his head would give way to an emptiness that was consoling if not comfortable. He wouldn't remember himself or what he did; only their assignments. But this time, with the words out of order; the searing pain was not going away. His vision blurred and wavered; sweat was running down his back, making the black jersey cling heavy against his skin. He forced himself to push forward; there was a time frame to follow; a target to acquire. Redemption to be had. It never came to mind that maybe the old widow made good on her promise to reverse the words.

"At least you're not puking, Soldier."

He couldn't hear the Voice. That happened sometimes; right after the wipes and words were employed. Everything went away. Memories, ghosts, voices, emotions; Bucky clung to the mission as a point of focus. A way to keep from drowning in the sea of pain.

"Get in. Tag the mark. Get out. Move on." Bucky repeated his simple mission over and over fighting the urge to descend into his nightmares.

He staggered down the side streets as urgently as his confusion would allow. It was nearly time for his contact with the next target; the ambush was unforeseen but the Soldier had done this enough to factor in distractions. The Soldier pressed on; Bucky worried why they knew about the words; had a tranquilizer gun and a taser. "Getting set up, Barnes….stupid to trust any of 'em." He scolded himself as he tucked away his suspicions into yet another compartment and resolved "Finish this….then maim the bitch."

"Control…..is this operation secure?" Steve asked tersely.

"Affirmative, Nomad. We are secure." Sharon's voice grated in their ears.

"Well you may be secure but our operative is two for two with threats at this point." Steve didn't hide his irritation. "What the hell is going on."

"I repeat. We are secure." Sharon held firm.

Fury cut in "Nomad….we have no clear evidence of another threat. But this is your call. We are ready to abort on your word...you'll need to get your operative out of the field though...no communications are open."

Steve, Natasha and Sam converged in the shadows near the target's building; they shut down their comm mics; and moved to the back up plan. Stick together as a team; leave Fury's team out.

Sam shook his head "I couldn't get to him….it happened so fast."

"He's not helpless...you said that yourself….he got away."

"He staggered off. I know they hit him with a taser...maybe a tranquilizer."

"So he's still on his feet." But Steve's sense of dread was screaming at him to pull Bucky out.

"Barnes isn't gonna be happy if you try to stop him." Natasha said what Steve was already thinking.

"What's your call, Nomad? Are you there?" Fury's voice broke in.

Steve's jaw twitched as he looked from Natasha to Sam. "That ambush was no coincidence...someone's feeding out his locations." He switched on the comm mic. "Abort. Abort the mission. We'll collect the operative immediately and be in touch." Steve jammed the shield hard onto his forearm and headed for Bucky's planned contact. "Let's go get him."

Sam nodded and took flight.

Natasha ran after Steve. "Texting only boys….can't believe I'm saying that. But the less we have to say to the airwaves the safer he'll be."

Bucky slid down a brick wall across from the entrance to the dance club. It was nearly 11 pm; the club doors would open soon and his target would arrive. The street was filled with a growing crowd of hopefuls; waiting for their chance at entry to Tentacles; one of the hottest underground dance clubs in the country. Not everyone was chosen to get in; fewer still were chosen to serve. Those that were chosen disappeared; one way or another. "The Gateway to Hydra." Was what the modern day Hydra elite called it. The Soldier had no opinion. Bucky cringed "Gateway to Hell."

He was two minutes early. Not that he was aware of his timing or of the growing crowd in the street. His hearing was forever attuned to the sounds of a threat; trained to let the laughter and hum of a benign crowd fall into the category of white noise. He ignored them to focus on his own internal dialogue. On a good day his thought pattern was loose and tangential; but now after the prolonged adrenalin rush; a taser, the words; his pressured mind was functioning like a pinball machine. He squatted with his butt on his heels, letting the solidness of the brick wall ground his body if not his thinking.

"Lost the knife...Widow's gonna kill me."

'Kevlar neck guard….don't tell her it worked...she'll crow."

"Birdman….watching me...creepy. Reporting back to Steve. Like I'm his kid or something"

"Shit...dyin' of thirst...shoulda brought that water bottle...Steve...god...you're so hilarious…." Bucky huffed an awkward laugh as he recalled Steve trying to get him to take a water bottle from the quinjet. "Are you crazy, Rogers? Really? NO. No stupid water bottles." Bucky let a quick rush of affection warm his sweat shivering body.

He wondered about his target:

"Did I meet her? Can't remember...how do I know her?"

"Never met her, Soldier...Pierce owned you by then. Kept you all to himself."

"Pierce? I almost forgot...I met her though?"

"No...never met her. Knew about her."

"But how do I know her?"

"Soldier! Irrelevant! Focus on the mission."

"Not irrelevant! I don't know what she looks like!" Bucky shouted out hum of the crowd dipped to silence for a moment...then laughter. Bucky shivered.

"Get a grip, Soldier. You are calling attention to yourself."

He became painfully aware of eyes staring at him. Many sets of eyes. "Shit….Barnes."

He didn't make eye contact with anyone as he shifted his energy into his thighs to slowly rise from a sitting squat; pushing his body up to his full height….letting the menace of the Soldier fill his frame and mind. He consciously calibrated the metal plates; the subtle sound of the warning wasn't lost on those closest to him.

He vaguely heard random comments as the laughter died down.

"Whoa, dude, he's got a gun." "Get away from him."

Bucky refocused on his mission.

"No sign of him." Sam texted from the roof of the building across the street.

"Nothing here." Natasha was prowling through the waiting throng.

Steve watched from the North end of the street; where the target's vehicle was expected to arrive. His best vantage point to spot Bucky if all went according to plan. Her vehicle would arrive at 11pm. Bodyguards; personal assistant; this month's lover; then the target would all emerge. She would be easy to spot, a tall and sturdy woman, middle aged with a shaved head and a demanding presence. Her trademark feature, from the few photos they could find, a red fur tentacled shawl that snaked around her neck and shoulders; no matter the outfit.

"Maybe he didn't make it this far." Steve worried they'd missed him as they raced along his planned route. "What if the taser shock threw him off course; what if he fell or was drugged, we could've run right by him." He thought about backtracking.

"Trust your instincts Nomad." Fury's whispered comment startled him from his thoughts; making him wonder if he had said any of it out loud. He was sure he hadn't but took Fury's advice as a sign.

"Is this how it is for Bucky? Voices in his ear telling him what to think or do?" Steve couldn't let the wave of empathy take over at the moment. He tucked it away and resolved to do just that ….trust his instincts.

"That's the plan, control. That is the plan." Steve stood his ground, waiting for Bucky.

The Soldier stood ready as the limousine approached. The gawking crowd lost interest; their short attention span diverted easily with the opening of the club doors. He counted on the mayhem; now and always; it was how he did his best work. Stay focused while chaos erupted.

The vehicle pulled up; the crowd parted for Ellingwood, with the help of her bodyguards. The Soldier stepped forward, steady, openly stalking her; unwavering attention on her alone. He pushed past the sapling humans around him, ignored the commands to "Stop, stand down." The guns that were drawn and pointed at him had no meaning; they didn't deter his singular progress. He knew they wouldn't use them; they didn't have the guts to actually pull the trigger, not here. Not in public like this.

"Taking a big gamble, Soldier. Like the old days."

"Not a gamble….a fact...a known fact….they won't shoot….she'll want more."

Bucky kept his dialogue to himself as he strode with real menace towards his target; but never raised a hand; he kept the laser gun, and the real gun, tucked in their holsters.

"STOP." The command rang through the crowd who scattered screaming away from the stand-off.

Steve looked on with horror as a wave of humanity fell away from the unfolding confrontation between Bucky and his target's entourage. He pushed forward against the running crowd; readied the shield, lined up his throw...take them out before they kill him.

Sam spread the wings and stepped to the ledge; guns up and aimed for the guards.

Natasha scrambled onto a car roof; stun gun aimed for the target.

Bucky didn't flinch; but he stopped. His eyes shifted to connect with his target's gaze; he saw her betray emotion for a split second. "Fear? Surprise? No matter…...I gotcha." He allowed the few thoughts to run through his head. He knew from her fleeting look of uncertainty; she'd taken the bait that he offered….himself.

"Enough, gentlemen. Lower your weapons." Ellingwood waved her hand dismissively as her guards slowly obeyed.
"Mistress...look at him...he's a clear threat." Her number one protector expressed his concern vehemently.

"Look at him indeed. Have you no sense of history? No sense of who you work for? Fool. Perhaps promoting you was a mistake." She pushed him aside to approach Bucky.

"Mistress, please use caution." The guard stepped closer, trying to insert himself between her and the object of her attention.

"If you value your life….you will not step in my way again." She shot her guard a final warning glance before locking eyes again with Bucky.

"This is the Winter Soldier." She announced. "He is legend in Hydra. You could learn a few things from him."

"Mistress...I know who he is. The Winter Soldier was lost to Hydra. Until proven otherwise...he is an enemy."

"Are you an enemy, Soldier?" She cooed as she reached to grip his metal arm.

Bucky didn't answer; he only stared at her; boldly. But he made no move to hurt her or pull away; he only allowed a faint tilt of his head to the side and softened his stance.

"You're coming home? Really? How did I miss this plan?"

Bucky didn't dare answer the Voice in his head; he was too afraid he'd say it out loud. But deep in the recesses of his mind he whispered "Makin' it up as I go, pal."

He followed his target's insistent pull on his arm as she led him into the club.

"What the hell?" Sam's text flashed on their phones.

"?" Natasha answered.

Steve groaned "Bucky...No."

The plan as written and agreed upon was to tag her from the street when she emerged from the vehicle. No contact, no talk, no overt risks and no evidence that he was there.

"Ok. He blew that plan out of the water." Sam groused when they regrouped near the entrance to the club.

"I have the blueprints...alternate entrances...we can get in there and follow him." Natasha was on her phone frantically pulling up schematics. "There are sewage drains; water run offs; we can get in there without being seen."

"No. No more chasing him." Steve's voice had a hint of fatigue.

"What? Steve...you can't mean that." Natasha grabbed his arm.

Before he could answer Sharon's voice cut in "Status report? Do you have Dodger in your possession?"

Steve felt a red flush of anger at her choice of the word 'possession'. He was more than tired of a few things lately. Her attitude was one; always watching Bucky walk away was another. He didn't answer her.

The comms crackled with static and a new voice cut in:

"Rogers...enlighten us….don't you get tired of chasing after him? Seems like all he ever does is run away from you. You screw over you're friends for that piece of shit and what kind of gratitude do you get. Nothing. He runs."

They stood in stunned silence before Steve barked "Who the hell…." he remembered to turn on his comm mic then "Who the hell is this?"

Natasha furiously tried to triangulate the signal.

Sam texted Fury "What the hell is going on? Our comm link has been hijacked."

They didn't have to see the speaker's face to hear the sneering "You'll find out soon enough. Clock is ticking though. Better catch him before I do. Rogers….You really think you can keep him safe from me?"

Steve drew in a deep and shaky breath. The voice on the comm was altered to hide their identify but the cadence and tone felt familiar; although he wasn't sure….and now wasn't the time for speculation.

Natasha switched on her comm. "Sharon what is going on? Fury...who was that?"

"No idea...we are tracking the signal." Fury hurriedly offered.

"We remain secure, people. Keep it together Romanova." Sharon barked.
"Excuse me..." Natasha hissed.

A flurry of scrambled denials, angry questions, accusations….all wasted time as Bucky descended into his past and Steve's hope slipped away.

"Time to stop watching him walk away….stop chasing him. Time to stop acting like he's incompetent. Let him go, Rogers." Steve muttered to himself.

Natasha was staring at him unabashedly with her mouth open. "Let him go? You're not saying that? It's Barnes. It's Bucky…..you can't let him go." Her voice trailed up at the end.

Sam shook his head "Alright, deja vu, we've been here before. Let him go….then chase him down….I get it...he's slippery...but I'll say it...who cares….he's grown on me...honestly, I can't live without the guy. Don't tell him that but I for one will not stop chasing him."

Steve stepped away from them and looked up at the sky...no stars...not here in the city; only darkness hovered over them; deep and empty, no sliver or chance at anything different. He felt the overwhelming urge to give up. He nearly let the darkness take him.

"No more chasing Sam." He whispered.

"Steve. No way..."

"Rogers, it's Barnes."

"Let me finish….no more chasing after him. Now… we trust him. He knows what he's doing. The question is how do we help him."

The deafening music hammered into his chest and ears; worse than gunfire; that at least was intermittent; this was relentless. The pulsating, whirling lights flashing over and through the swarms of moving bodies brought him right back to the day of his suicide attempt. Cold and clammy hands touching his face and body. Fingers slipping across his hair; writhing bodies pressed against his own. Only this was real not a nightmare or a dream; he brought to bear every fiber of self-restraint to not pull a weapon and clear a path for himself. He definitely did not think about puking.

His target had slipped her fingers into his metal hand; he could remotely feel her thumb stroking across the back of it; it was oddly sickening. She led him relentlessly forward through the crowd, towards her private suite overlooking the dance floor. He averted his eyes towards the ground; the strobe lights stirred a too familiar tremor in his mind. He vaguely though he saw a shadow of Maria Stark as he grabbed onto that damn leaf that Sam was always talking about.

"What brings you here, Soldier?" Ellingwood sat on the edge of a mahogany desk in the middle of a poshly decorated office. The music was muted here; merely a pulsing shudder like a heart beat beneath the skin of a neck. She ran her eyes over him up and down slowly; the way one might look over an animal's conformation before purchase; hoping for a proven winner. He would have felt violated if it hadn't happened before; if he hadn't counted on it as his way in the door. Bucky decided to do something unexpected of the Soldier.

He smirked.

"You answer me with a smirk? Should I listen to my guards and have you killed?" She shifted her feet a hair; betraying her readiness to move quickly if needed.

Her guards tightened their grip on the weapons; he had taken note of the safeties being off; they weren't completely inept.

"You have something I want Mistress." Bucky spoke carefully, cadenced, the way he guessed they would have thought a mindless pawn would speak. But with a hint of the provocative.

"Something? What could I have that would interest you? A mere soldier." She relaxed a bit and sipped from the drink her assistant presented.

"Access. You have access…..to the underground. I want to go there." Bucky wasn't a spy; not like Romanova. Lying wasn't his first choice. Cutting straight to the chase was his way. He wanted to get to the vast array of Hydra resources in the underground buried deep below the bustling city.

She laughed "I have access….correct. But why would I let you go there? What do you want there?"

"I want to….go….home." Still, he wasn't lying. He desperately wanted to go home. He was hot and tired; his head hurt, Mrs Stark was staring at him from the other side of the window and it was long past time to take his medications. He was missing Steve; and Romanova a little; and Sam, but he wouldn't admit it; and well if he let in the maudlin sentimentality he even missed the old yellow farmhouse.

Ellingwood's words dragged him back from his tangential thoughts "You walked away from Hydra, from your keepers; your family. And now you stroll in here after three years and announce you want to come home? You certainly have balls. I"ve heard that about you."

"I...thought Hydra was dead...Project Insight….I was confused. There's no place for me out here. I want to go home; at least in the underground I won't have to run."

She studied him for a moment. "What's in it for me? Are you asking for a kindness? I think you know that I'm a businesswoman after all, not prone to kindness."

Bucky knew it would come down to this. What would he offer her to pay for access both to the underground as he asked but also the access to her for his overt mission. It would cost him to tag her; cost even more to get to his goal; his unspoken mission.

"My time with Hydra is over. Why wipe my mind and store me in cryo when you have an army of brainless sheep. You have them." Bucky gestured to the dance floor and glanced at the guards surrounding him. "You don't need me….as a soldier." His tone at the end said all it needed.

She smiled and placed her drink on the desk. "But that arm; your enhancements. Those sheep are just that, sheep. You on the other hand…." She crossed to take his metal hand and open it flat; her eyes stayed locked on his as she ran her tongue across his palm and sucked at his fingertips. "Can you feel that?"

Bucky did everything in his power to control the twitch deep within his shoulder that said "Strangle this monster right now." He let the Soldier's ability to separate from the uncomfortable to take over as he whispered "Yes."

Her hand came up to stroke his cheek; her thumb dragged across his lips. He could hear the woman's lover let out a menacing hiss of disapproval; he ignored it, and raised his flesh hand to embrace the back of her neck and pull her into a devouring, filthy kiss.

She never felt the tagging tracker palmed in his hand, as it slipped into the flesh on her neck. He made damn sure that kiss was everything loving, dirty and lustful that he'd ever wanted to do to Steve and then some. It was the only way to tag her; and get to the next step of his plan.

"Got him." Natasha announced.

Sam was under the counter in the security office disabling the video recordings.

Steve was staring dumbfounded at the screen.

"Well...that was filthy." Natasha murmured.

Steve blushed.

Sam wondered "What? What's filthy?" By the time he stood up and looked at the live feed the kiss was over and Bucky was dispatching the three guards without their help.

"Nothing of interest." Steve mumbled.

"What did I miss? Come on..." Sam whined.

"Later." Natasha mouthed and put one finger to her lips.

Steve and Natasha burst through the door to Ellingwood's office; Steve was up high, shield braced and ready to fly.

Natasha low, she tuck and rolled into the room stunners up and ready.

Sam ran in right behind them, guns drawn.

Bucky swung around; his metal hand was tight around Ellingwood's neck; his pupils were full and dark, the way he looked after a particularly bad nightmare, Steve thought.

"It's ok, pal. Let her go. Not our mission, right." Steve tried to talk him down.

Natasha checked the guards. "Alive, Steve." She went cautiously towards the sniveling sounds that came from under the desk.

"Come on. Let her go." Steve crept closer.

"No. I don't want to go with you. Stay away from me." Bucky sounded uncertain.

He backed up towards a doorway; away from Steve and Natasha; dragging the target with him.

"Bucky...stop….it's over. We need to go."

"Shut up. Stop talking right now!" He raised a hand and pointed a gun directly at Steve. It wasn't the laser gun.

Steve stopped moving. "Ok. We're good here."

Sam froze.

Natasha didn't.

She stunned Bucky's target right in his arms; the woman slumped down and fell at his feet. He shivered with the stun's aftershock that ran through his arm. She then turned the stun gun on him. "Drop the gun Soldier. You're not getting out of this." She winked at Steve and tilted her head towards the desk.

Bucky watched Romanova with uncertainty; his hand with the gun still raised but not pointed at any one in particular.

"God he looks tired." She thought absently.

Steve moved cautiously forward, watching Bucky, not quite sure of what his end game was. He peeked under the desk to find two weeping souls too terrified to even look at him. "Come on, come out...no one's going to hurt you." He gently pulled them out as they wailed loudly at the sight of Bucky holding a gun with their boss's limp body at his feet.

Sam took over "Alright….just get in there while we take him out of here. No one's getting hurt. No one is dead. Let us get out of here. Ok." He ushered them into the closet and locked the door.

"We need to talk." Steve tersely whispered as he approached Bucky who turned away.

"No! No more walking away!" Steve growled as he cut him off.

"Get out of my way." Bucky growled back.

"Boys. Let's move this argument elsewhere." Natasha, ever the voice of reason, as she pointed at the closet door.

"Fine. This way." Bucky led them towards a small door at the far side of the office; he put his fist through it and yanked it open.

"Where the hell are we going?" Steve demanded.

"To the underground."

They followed Bucky down a rusty spiral staircase that ended in a damp and musty basement. He made his way to an old wooden shelving unit that moved easily aside to reveal an entrance. He stepped through.

"Wait." Steve grabbed at Bucky's arm. "Give me five minutes. Don't you even care why we intervened?"

Bucky looked at him with curiosity. "The mission is compromised. The guards were early; the van with the soldiers….they tried to use the words, tried to trigger me; this one knew I was coming. I could see it in her eyes."

"You're pretty calm about this Barnes." Sam remarked.

"Nothin' new." Bucky sighed and started down the dimly lit corridor.

Steve grabbed his arm again. "Buck. It's...worse than that. Someone cut in on the comms, told us they're after you. Dared me to keep you safe."

"Well you've got your job cut out for you then, pal." He took a few more steps then paused to call over his shoulder. "Are you coming? Or are you just going to stand there and watch me walk away yet again?"

"Stop running away from me." Steve shot back.

Bucky turned to face him but didn't close the space. "I'm not running away from you. I keep moving forward because I have to; I have no choice. There's a horde of people after me, that's who I'm running from. Not you."

Steve caught up to him. "You went back into cryo...you could've stayed with me...you didn't."

Bucky could hear the hurt in his voice. "Stevie...the horde after me; the worst one is me; my ghosts, that fucking Voice in my head. I was tired, afraid. I couldn't see another way out except to sleep." He lowered his voice "It wasn't about leaving you; I never want to leave you."

Steve stepped closer to bump his shoulder against Bucky's and sighed "But things are different now. Right? The voices aren't as bad. Things are better."

Bucky shrugged "Yeah. The ghosts are quieter, nightmares are better. I can actually carry on a conversation with Romanova for more than five minutes."

"Speaking of voices." He dug around in a pocket of his cargo pants and pulled out a crumpled envelope and tore it open. "Why the hell didn't you make me take that water bottle?" He smirked and knocked back the medications dry.

Steve looked at him closely. "Maybe it's time we run...together."

"Together? You and me?...Or all four of us? I dunno...Wilson? I don't think I can go on the run with him." Bucky groaned and whispered "Let's not tell him. Ok?"

"Not tell me what?" Sam interjected as they continued down the corridor.

"We're going on the run without you." Natasha quipped, then added

"Hey Barnes, who knew you had THAT in you!" She pointed back towards the stairs.

"Right...well speaking of that….what the hell was that?" Steve's voice was pitched a little higher than usual.

"What are you talking about?" Bucky groused.

"That, Barnes...he's talking about THAT." Natasha squeezed between them in a rather intrusive way then sauntered ahead.

Sam chimed in "What are you talking about...what did I miss?"

"That….absolutely filthy kiss, pal." Steve whispered as he stepped in front of Bucky to stop him.

"Oh. That. You really think that was filthy?" Bucky sounded genuinely surprised, even innocent.

"I missed a filthy kiss? Shit." Sam mumbled.

"It was." Steve added sternly.

"Ok...sorry." Bucky feigned contrition then added. "Too bad." He leaned his chest into Steve's and brushed his lips across his ear "That's just a little piece of what I plan on doing to you."

Steve smiled "Really? Pal."

"Well you better hold that thought for later Barnes." Natasha interrupted. "We are not alone."