Hi! It's been so long since i last did a chapter for this...just haven't felt inspired for this as it was one of the first tales I ever started...

hope people still wanna read this...

Shera stepped back in a mixture of surprise and disgust. She hadn't seen what she just had. No way was that possible, the captain didn't like guys. No, not possible...never in a million years would he ever touch a man. Hugs and kissing made the blonde shiver in disgust, even talking about feelings made him leave a room.

She shook her head, "Captain...what?"

The blonde underneath the raven haired warrior looked away for a second, he didn't know what to say to her. He didn't even know what to say to Vincent or himself right now. All these feelings that had taken hold of him and he had no one to really talk to. The two people who he might've spoken to where the ones he didn't want to speak to.

Vincent stood up, looking at his feet. Once again he was the other man in a relationship. His heart sank, he was hurting another innocent soul and he shouldn't have even entertained the thought. Yet, Cid had actually moved to kiss him, surely that meant something?

He couldn't quite see Shera going out of her way to exact her revenge on him. Her soul didn't seem the type to be vindictive but he had always thought that Lucrecia had been a caring soul. He could be wrong about people but he felt so right about Shera. She would be devastated but wouldn't harm anyone and as far as he knew, she didn't have a secret lab in Cid's home.

The quiet woman held onto the door frame for support, "What happened?"

It was Vincent who came up with the badly made lie, "Nothing happened. He pulled me up a little to fast and I simply fell. It doesn't help being taller than him."

"Do I look stupid?" Shera gave him a pointed look, "You kissed him."

The former Turk took a breath, "...yeah. Bad call on my part. I'm sorry."

Cid blinked as he sat on his elbows, his blue eyes going from Vincent to Shera. Bad call? Was the kiss a mistake to him or was he just covering his ass when speaking to Shera? Surely he should at least make an excuse up but found he was to busy being ignored by the two standing people.

"You're sorry?" Shera placed a hand on her stomach, "No...I don't think you are."

Vincent blinked in surprise, he was sorry. He hadn't intended to feel things for the captain, he had been quite willing to actually curl up in a small ball and die in the mansion. It wasn't his fault that Cid had came to him looking for help and not her. Right now, he needed Cid to be here with him. If he was going to die, then he wanted to die with someone who made him feel human.

He wanted to learn more of the blonde, to find out why the pilot needed to feel so comforted while sleeping, to try and help him through whatever it was right now that seemed to be haunting him.

What possible motive did he have for telling her that lie? If anything he was trying to help her not to be hurt and he was trying to fix this. Telling her that the kiss had been nothing and that he had made all the moves on the blonde.

Why did she think that his actions had been dishonest? Cid wouldn't really be hers, no matter how hard she wanted him to. Trapping him with the child was only going to make them resent each other more in the end but he didn't want to be the reason why a possible relationship between them hadn't worked.

The room had taken on that cold chill again and it didn't seem to be warming anytime soon. The situation didn't look good, Cid had said nothing, the blonde merely sitting on the floor. His frame being dwarfed by the size of the beds and by the two standing above him. Shera stayed near the door, unsure if she wanted to scream at them or hit them or...anything.

There has to be a rational explanation to this, Shera shook her head, Cid...tell me this isn't happening.

"We should head back," Cid slowly got to his feet, rejecting any help from Vincent as he stood up. He gave Shera a long look, he had to speak with her alone, in private and not with half the hotel.

He knew she was going to scream, shout and throw things at him. It was understandable, he was thinking about having a relaionship with a man he barely knew while she was pregnant with his child.

Whoa..thinking about a relationship with Vincent? No...it was just a kiss. They'd been through a lot...it happened in extreme cases where people of the same sex are often forced into, they develop feeling for each other. He cared alot for Tifa and Yuffie. Hell, if Tifa had kissed him, he wouldn't have fought her off.

So, why did you when you had the chance? You know, after we got the Highwind back from the Shinra? The two of you were pretty cosy up there, that same voice that had been telling to do stuff had came back, you could have been in with a chance.

I...she's like a sister to me, Cid kept his face passive as he responded to the voice in his head, wondering why he hadn't acted upon the impulse when he had the chance to with Tifa.

He was attracted to her, she was a stunning brunette. Kind, sweet, loyal to a fault. When she relaxed after battle or even during battle, she still had that beauty that made most of her enemies misjudge her. As attractive as she was, she was just not his type. She was still a frightened little girl who needed to be loved and sadly, she was never going to get it as long as she stayed with Cloud.

He had told her that, after he had questioned her all about the awkward blonde. He could have been more polite about it but he had been so confused at the time, he wanted to know why the hell he had been put through the whole charade of Nibelhiem being burnt to a crisp and having a former Shinra general walking around like he hadn't shimmied of the mortal coil.

He knew he should have taken that topic up with Cloud or with the aforementioned general when they were getting their collective asses kicked by the transformed man with the one wing during the last battle they had had as a team.

After the team have stolen the airship...

The evening had been pleasant, a little cold but nothing that a light sweater couldn't solve. He had came up on deck to get some fresh air, unsure if he really was doing the right thing by stealing the airship. Granted, it had been one hell of a feat to accomplish but had it been the right decision to make? The crew of the airship felt happier under his command, he could feel that as soon as he stept onto her after she had been stolen.

They no longer hid or ran whenever Heidegger or Scarlett was mentioned and they didn't have to fear being attacked for not doing something fast enough. They were all good people who loved working on the legendary airship but had lost that love when they were under the rule of the Shinra. The air reeked of depression when he had ran aboard when the planet released the mighty Weapons on the unsuspecting populace.

AVALANCHE had already been branded as traitors and now here he was, once a poster boy for the Shinra airforce, now he was a eco terrorist with grand theft larcany looming above his head. Not exactly something he could really fire on a C.V for any future employment, mind you. If things stayed the way they were going, job hunting would be the least of his problems.

The crew of the Highwind were happy to follow his orders to the last. A new life had been breathed into them and they had actually nominated him to be the captian, even though there had been a perfectly capable one in command already.

Anything he did now, he would be branded as a traitor and if he ever had the galls to step back into the airforce, they would court martial his balls to the high heaven and he'd be singing soprano for the rest of his life. He also really didn't like the fact that he would probably start spelling his name Sid.

He hadn't spotted Tifa standing behind the grey bulkhead, "God...this is a mess."

"Yeah, it is," the young martial artist agreed, "and I'm so sorry for getting everyone involved in this."

Cid turned round, his blue eyes blinking in surprise. Why was she apologizing? It wasn't her fault, it was the Shinra, it was Hojo's. It was everyone else's bar her. She was one of the innocent idiots that the Shinra had fooled, just like he was. Like Vincent all those years ago.

"You're...? Tifa, what the hell haveya got to be sorry for?" Cid rubbed the back of his neck, "Have I turned two pages at once here?"

That earned him a sour laugh, her dark eyes gazing over to the setting sun. He couldn't see how she felt it was her fault. She wasn't the one who had done all this, did she blame herself for Cloud? He had been there and he couldn't find any words that could have helped.

All he had suggested when the young man had came to him was, 'Let's go back to the real world huh?'. Why had he suggested that? It wasnt like the real world was all that great in the first place. People die, the Shinra screwing the general public and here he was, trying to save the planet from a total fruitloop.

"I should have been stronger. I should have told Cloud that he wasn't created by Hojo," Tifa hugged herself, feeling colder than it was, her long hair blowing in her eyes.

"Ya tried to stop him but he wasn't listening to ya," Cid moved closer to her, "It aint your fault."

The young woman sniffed back tears, trying her hardest to fight the salty droplets but failing miserable. She shook her head, the wind making the hair on the back of her neck stand. She should have just allowed Scarlett to kill her, just taken the deep breaths as the gas filtered through.

"I should have told him the truth," she whispered, tears fell freely down her face.

"Which is what?" Cid pulled out a smoke from the near empty packet that he kept strapped under his goggles, "Uh, yeah sure Cloud. Hojo created you out of my memories.' TIfa, ya were scared, ya still are."

"You don't understand!" Tifa cried out, "No one does..."

The pilot gave her a pained look, he couldn't handle tears. He stretched his hand out to her but he pulled it back. He felt like an idiot as he rubbed the back of his head, he hated it when people cried. It wasn't like he couldn't help her, he just couldn't find the words that would make it go away.

He looked at the setting sun, "Wherever he is, I promise ya, I'll take ya to him."

A another sour laugh emerged from Tifa's throat, "He's probably dead. Sephiroth's summoned Meteor and we're all gonna die so I might as well head back to Midgar and hand myself in. There's no way we can do this alone."

Cid walked over to the railing, "Let's go back to the real world huh?"

"What?" Tifa frowned.

"If you feel damn useless," Cid turned round, leaning on the metal railing, "All I managed was 'let's go back to the real world'. Not exactly a great prep talk."

The martial artist looked to the heavens, wondering if the young former soldier was okay. If he was, then where was he? They had no clue as to where to try and find the young man and they were all being hunted by the Shinra. It somehow made her feel a little better that they had the use of an airship to go and find the missing Cloud. They were out of the Shinra reach, they could go wherever they pleased and not be hindered by them as they went from place to place.

"This is your airship?" Tifa decided to change the subject, "The Highwind?"

That got a broad grin from the blonde, "Oh yeah. First of her kind and hopefully not the last. Aint she a beaut?"

"Very cool..." Tifa walked to the railing beside him, "Cloud first saw it when he climbed up the tower to get into upper Junon. He promised Aeris that he would try and give her a ride in it."

"Why didn't you tell him that he wasn't created?" Cid suddenly hated how his mouth would somehow and magically work with a will of it's own, never really letting him think about what he was asking and to who.

The martial artist shrugged, "I don't know. Maybe because I really don't know who he is. I knew a Cloud, Sephiroth was right about that, and he left to go and join SOLDIER when we were young."

"Sephiroth could be trying to screw with ya head," Cid offered, "Vincent claims that you came running over to them looking for the black materia. When Barret went to give it to ya, the rest were knocked flat on their asses. They came to and found that you and Barret were gone but that's impossible. We were in that damn weird cave with the rest of the Shinra."

"Do you think that he's real?" the young woman whispered, catching him off guard again.

"...no one can be as messed up as that kid," Cid offered her slowly, "and not show some signs of cracks. Mako does strange shit to the human body. I...I don't have an answer that I want to bet a life on right now."

"I mean," Cid shrugged, "if he aint real, don't cry over him. It's not like he would ever really be yours."

Tifa shivered, feeling the light spit of the rain as it started to fall on the Highwind's wooden deck. He was right. It's not like he would ever be her's but it didn't stop her from dreaming about it. It didn't make it hurt anyless that it was right. Cloud loved Aeris and he had been hurting when she had been killed so coldly by Sephiroth.

The sun had finally set and the air had taken on a colder, more lonlier feel to it. There was no warmth of her blood and she hadn't brought a jumper out with her, her teeth chattered in responce to the colder weather. She gazed onto the ground below the deck, they were passing over the snowy north, hoping to find some trace of the missing leader.

She blinked in surprise when Cid slipped his jacket around her, she had to stop herself from melting in his arms. His jacket felt so warm and cosy. Her arms and upper body feeling the heat almost instantly. Her legs still came out in goosebumps but she found that she could bear that as long as her chest was warm.

"Thanks," she whispered into Cid's chest, a little amazed to find that he hadn't smoked the ciggarrete that he had pulled from the pack.

"Hate to see a pretty girl freeze her ass off," Cid smiled awkwardly, unsure if Tifa meant to move the way she did then. He felt her arms slip around his waist, brushing agaisnt a scar that was decades old.

"Barret would have your head if he saw us like this," Tifa rested her head on his chest, trying to count how many heartbeats the blonde was currently having. She'd never heard one beat as fast as this before, was she making him uncomfy?

"...uh...it's innocent right? Just two...friends...having an innocent...moment. You're upset...I...um..." Cid looked at every star that was showing in the sky as it darkened, unsure of what he should be doing.

"Mmm," the young woman in his arms nodded, "Two friends."

Maybe Cid could give her what she really needed. Maybe she could give him the love he needed or was she just wishing agaisnt a fast falling star?

She tipped her head up slighty to try and make her move. Her dark eyes closing as she tried to move in for the kiss only to find Cid pull back. The man blushing furiosly as he shifted his weight from foot to foot.

"What?" she breathed, "I don't...?"

Cid held out both his hands, "No...Tifa. I am the last asshole you wanna be thinking about that like. Go for someone your own age."

Present

Even now, that sentence still rang true for him. He was the last one that anyone would want to love. He didn't care if he died a short painless death, he'd face it with a curse and swear like the bastard he was.

So why did Shera still feel the need to actually try and work on a relationship with him? He had treated her like mud from the word go when the rocket failed to go the first time yet he had treated her like royalty when they had landed after the second launch. It wasn't right. He didn't deserve her.

"When we get back to Rocket Town," Cid leaned forward, lowering his voice so Shera would be the only one to her him but he knew Vincent would hear him anyway, "we have to have a long talk."

Shera blinked, did he know? Had he always known and that was why he had left the town? To get away from her and all the whispers that had been going on behind his back? All she could do was nod, that was all they could do right now, perhaps if she got him to speak openly of his feelings, she might get him back.

The words hadn't been said in anything resembling a mean tone, his voice gentle, as though he had resigned himself to a fate that he wasn't ready for. She cared for him but could she really be held responsible for destroying his life yet again?

Vincent blinked, unsure if he should accompny the pair back to Rocket Town. Perhaps it would be best for him if he just returned to the mansion's basement and just wait for his death the take him with open arms.

Would Cid allow him to go back to the mansion? Would he forget about him if he was asked to?

"I'll...remain here," Vincent finally said slowly.

Shera surprised both men gathered in front of her, "No. You...don't look at all well Mister Valentine. Come home with me and the captain, until you're feeling strong."

A soft smile played on the former's Turks lips, she was taking it better than expected. Did she belive the kiss had been innocent or was she merely trying to get on the captain's good side? He spared her a glance as he walked out of the hotel room, frowning as the woman's eyes darted away from his.

Was she tryng to figure out why she was allowing him to stay with them or was she planning on doing something that would ultimitley destroy all three lives that were involved in her own world?