When Phil went back to work that night, he already knew my stance on the issue. He knew that I really didn't like the idea of him going back to servicing those men, because he was still sick, and because he could spread the HIV to more potential victims. And I hated calling them victims here, because that wasn't really what they were at all. They were disgusting, sleazy men taking advantage of a barely legal teenage boy's warped sexuality. And yet I was supposed to feel bad because they were being exposed to a virus that they may as well have exposed Phil to in the first place. Maybe Phil's idea wasn't too far off, thinking they deserved it. I wouldn't say it's the right way of thinking about it, or that it justified anything, but I could at least start to understand where he was coming from.

Still, I didn't like it. He was trying to convince me and himself that he was all ready to get back to work, but I wasn't buying it. I put a hand on his forehead, feeling the predicted heat. "You're still really sick. I really don't think you should be going back to this. Uh, not yet, anyway."

He smirked and kissed me sweetly, and I couldn't help but frown a bit when his lips pulled away all too quickly. "I already told Dane I'd be fine."

"And you really think he believed it? I didn't. I don't think you did, either." I stood up to stand in front of him, looking down, hoping I had enough stature to look somewhat intimidating enough to change his mind. If that didn't work, I could hope this would. "You're sick, and need to rest for a while. If you don't, you'll get worse; and given your condition, if you get worse, you'll probably die." I huffed out a breath. "I don't want you to die, Phil. I really, really don't. And I don't want you going back to working for that bastard."

"Didn't we discuss this last night, Dan? Dane takes good care of me. The least I could do is keep my word to him, and get back to work tonight." He sounded irritated, but I had to ignore his tone if I wanted to get through to him.

"I'm sorry. I can't let that happen."

"And what are you gonna do about it."

I had to make a hasty decision. It might be rash, but it was the only way I could get him out of a life like this. He'd thank me for it in the end.

I turned and headed out the door, ignoring as Phil called hoarsely after me. I heard him lapse into a coughing fit, but didn't turn back like I wanted to, to go help him. I headed to the room we'd previously been staying in –the room where Dane and the girls were still living. I rapped my trembling fist against the door, before I could change my mind.

Dane opened the door and glared down at me. I swallowed hard, nerves taking over and the words tingling in my mouth. "What do you want, kid?" he asked tiredly.

I didn't mean for the words to be blurted out so suddenly, but once they were said I couldn't take them back. "Phil has AIDS."

There was a long moment of silence and I already regretted my decision. Dane let out a humorless laugh that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end, and he went back to the room where Phil and I had spent the night. I followed quickly behind; I wanted to tell him I was lying, that it was a joke, but in the back of my mind I knew no good would come out of that, either. There was just no way to avoid this awful situation. All I could really do was keep my mouth shut and let the two of them settle it.

Phil was slumped in the open doorway, coming down from another fit, and Dane towered over him a little too closely. I couldn't see them very well from several feet away, but I was too nervous to get closer. I watched as Phil's eyes started tearing up and he fell into another weak fit of coughing, looking pale and flushed and like he might vomit.

I half-expected Dane to hit him, but his hands never left his side. All I made out was a simple, forlorn sounding statement. "If this gets out you're gonna be a threat to my business…"

Phil looked about ready to fall to his knees and beg to stay, and I felt like a disgusting human being. I couldn't believe what I'd done, that I'd betrayed him and his trust like this. I wanted to cry from the guilt but I didn't let myself do so. Now was not the time to be selfishly piteous; I had no one to blame but myself, and Phil was now paying the price. All I could do was try to convince myself that this was what was best –but if that was true then why did I feel so dirty?

Nothing else was said. Phil went stumbling out of the doorway and went past me. I could tell by the set wetness in his eyes that he was trying to stay strong when he knew he was about to break. I wrapped an arm around his shoulders, just to help him down the balcony and down the stairs. I was honestly amazed when he didn't try to pull away from the person who'd forcefully yanked him out of the only life he knew. I selfishly liked to believe that this meant I'd done the right thing by him, by both of us.

We got to the sidewalk and just started walking. I worried Phil might get sicker in the cold but there wasn't too much I could do to avoid it. It made my chest hurt to think of him suffering further for this.

An idea struck me then. "Let's sit down for a bit," I suggested, trying to sound sweet and soothing so as not to agitate his fragile state. He didn't respond, just sat down on the bench beside me, curling in on himself a bit. I rubbed his back and discreetly watched the parking lot of the motel, waiting anxiously for Dane to leave. I watched what I knew to be his car pull out and leave. I smiled and turned to Phil.

"I'll be right back, okay? Just stay here, try to… calm down a bit." He nodded shallowly and I headed back to the motel, going up the stairs two at a time and walking briskly to where I knew I'd find the girls. I knocked and waited.

Angel answered. She paused for a long moment. "Daddy told us what happened. Is Kitten okay?"

I had to be honest here. "No, I don't think so. He's still really sick and has nowhere to go now. Neither of us have any money and if he stays exposed to this weather, he's probably- probably gonna die."

She gasped, frowning deeply. "Oh god… How- How can we help?" She sounded eager, and over her head I saw all the other girls perked to attention.

"We just need some money –I swear I won't spend any of it on myself, he just needs to get somewhere warm before his illness gets worse. If- If we could just have at least some of what you girls have now, we won't ask for any more. I promise." I had to stay hopeful, had to believe that they'd want to help their friend even if it meant giving up what little money they had.

Angel turned to the others and, slowly but surely, they all nodded in understanding, and went to get their cash. In all they brought me eighty dollars –"Two nights' work," Sunny said. I put it away in my pocket, and thanked them profusely. "Take care of him," Shiba made me promise, and I headed back to find Phil, to get him that coat I'd been wanting for him.

I found him half-conscious on the bench, already worse than I'd thought. I bit my lip, staring down at him and mind racing for what to do. I had no money for him to stay in the hospital, but after the coat, I'd have enough for bus fare, and a trip to the clinic.