So here is another Chapter
I hope you liked the last one; this one is so much less agnsty, more fluff. Hope you guys like it
I do not own any of the rights to the characters; all characters belong to Cassandra Clare.
Title: The Art of Seduction
Summary: After one too many comments from Alec during a romantic comedy movie, on how 'impossible' it is to seduce someone to bed, merely by a romantic gesture, Magnus takes this as a personal challenge to prove is adorable niave little boyfriend wrong.
Characters: Magnus and Alec
Day: 14
"This is ridicules." Alec grumbled, head on my lap; his brilliant blue eyes staring scornfully at the screen. I paused, glancing down at him, my fingers currently twirling his long black locks.
"What is darling?" I asked, amused by his pout, pausing the movie to turn and look at my darling boyfriend.
"This notion, how many times have we seen this in some cheesy movie-"
"Cheesy!?" I gasped in mock horror. He rolled his eyes in return.
"-where some guy manages to bed some girl, no touch needed, by some pathetic overrated romantic gesture. I mean come on; he doesn't even kiss her, or ignite passion in her through any kind of foreplay. All these idiots have to do is get these chicks a box of chocolates and a bouquet of roses to have then panting, wanting, and basically dragging them into the bedroom! The idea is idiotic and just unethical. No one is seduced into being bed ready by just a simple gesture. I mean seriously, come on! All he did was by her some damn golden bracelet, with the words, 'Until forever ends my love' engraved in Latin on it, and she basically fucked him then and there! It doesn't work like that."
I smile amusedly at his little outburst. He was so cute and he didn't even try, the little minx.
"And how would you know? It's not like you've been seduced by any number of people, other than me of course, love. Or is there something you're not telling me." I wink at him, causing a light blush to rise to his cheeks as he squirmed out of my lap.
"Obviously not, but it's not like you have me hard and wanting by just a few sweet words, there is always some other things that must happen before sex crosses the mind."
I chuckled at his logic, remembering the poor boy was only eighteen, and only ever bedded by yours truly. By Lilith, I was the boy's first anything in that regard, a thought I took very much pride in.
"So you're saying you don't ever come here planning on making love?" I purred, pulling him close to me, drawing my lips next to his ear as I spoke.
"Are you trying to tell me, the only time you have ever thought about sleeping with me is when were already deep into… other things, as you put it."
Alec's cheeks turned crimson as he pushed me away gently, causing me to laugh at his too adorable awkwardness. I swear it was a weapon all of its own. He looked away flushed, before, almost inaudibly, grumbling-
"Of course not, I'm just saying there is always something that has to engage it first. In all these movies, as soon as the big romantic whatever happens, they're panting and sweating in bed, couch, against the door, the very next second. No one is turned on enough for that just from some cheesy gift."
"What? You don't think I could bed you without any foreplay beforehand? Or make you, as you put it, bed ready, by just being my charming olé self?" I smirked when he moved ever so slightly away from me on the couch
"Charming as a snake…" I hear him mutter.
"What was that?" I ask teasingly. He glances up at me, shaking his head fast.
"Nothing, nothing; just that there is no way in hell you, could bed anyone by just some stupid gesture.
"Oh really?" I grin it him, a grin much like the Cheshire cat I'd like to think. Alec opened his mouth to continue his argument, when his phone buzzed. He glanced at me apologetically, before answering it.
"Hello? ….. Yeah…. At Magnus's. …. How many are- Where are you- Ok, I'll be there in a few minutes."
He turned to me, an 'I'm sorry, but-' In his eyes. Before he could open his mouth, I waved my hand at him.
"Go on ahead, I know all about your little shadowhunter business to know when you have to leave me to go fight some great evil pixie and stop some horde of magic rabid bunnies from stampeding all of central park."
He smiled crookedly at me, before kissing me gently on my mouth, pulling away before I had any real time to enjoy it.
"Magic rabid bunnies you say? Now that would be a sight to see."
"I could conjure up a few right now if you want, we can call your clave buddies saying you're being held up by the infestation." I smirk at him, causing a quick, and ever so present, role to his eyes.
"I don't think so, I doubt even Jace would see the humor behind, rabid rabbits, though he might let me stay behind if they're some rabid ducks involved."
"Rabid ducks? I could have those with a snap of-"
"Don't even think about ti Magnus." He scolded mockingly, before standing up from the couch and heading towards the door. Pausing his hand on the handle.
"You want to come with? We can never be to careful, and a warlock is always helpful to have a round." He mumbles sheepishly. Oh Lilith did I want to grab in my arms saying yes, but for my plan to work, I needed some time alone for preparation.
"Wish I could love, you know how much I just love hwlping your friends out." I mutter sarcasticly, before more playfully adding.
"Besides I have some work I want to get done today, but I will see you here around dinner, unless you already have any other preceding plans."
He sighed, a bit exasperated, a little dramatic flair added to him by my constant presence I'd like to think.
"Do I look like I'd have any other plans Magnus? See you at dinner." He muttered before slamming the door behind him. I know he was upset I declined from heading out with him, but I'm sure his anger wouldn't last; especially if my plans went accordingly tonight. I stood up, and switched off the TV, this movie was cheesy.
"Magnus?" I heard his voice echo through the apartment.
"In here love." I called, smirking; waiting to see his face as he walked in.
"The kitchen Magnus? I was starting to think you didn't even know you had one." Came a laughing voice.
"Alec, you wound me." I mock whimper, and put on a pout as Alec enters the kitchen, Chairman Meow curled into his chest. The second he entered though, the look of awe that was expecting, was replaced by a look of slight horror, his nose crinkling with shock.
"Magnus, what are you doing?"
"Making you dinner of course." I stated, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"Magus!" He cringed, as he looked about the kitchen.
"Of course not! I just thought it might be nice to make something from my own two hands, isn't that what couples do?" I asked, raising an eye brow in his direction.
"Yes, but usually cooking doesn't involve burning the apartment down." He frowned at me.
"Why are you cooking? All you need to do is poof up some take out. Is your magic of the fritz or something?"
Insulted I looked about my kitchen, sure the chicken was black, but it's not like it was crumbled into ash like the first attempt.
"Oh posh, like Isabelle could do better."
"I think she actually could, why rocking the pink, kiss the cook, apron more as well." He smirked at me, putting down my cat who the second his paws touched the floor and he hissed at the smoke filled room, before dashing wildly out of there as fast as he could.
"Excuse me?" I'll have you know that I 'rock' pink much more than your cooking deficient sister could."
"You really want to talk cooking deficient?" He asked mildly, glancing around the kitchen as smoke alarms started going off.
I huff before slapping some of the slightly burned chicken on a plate, slathering on some greenish pasta as well, and shoving the plate in his hand.
"Try it." I demand.
He looks at me suddenly alarmed, glancing between me and the plate enough times to be comical.
"Excuse me?"
"You want to make cruel remarks about the dinner I slaved away to make you, and you won't even try it?" I sigh, playing on a bit dramatically. Slapping my hand to my forehead with a long heaved sigh.
"The pasta is green Magnus. Green! Are you trying to poison me?" He questioned.
"Well if it's that hard for you to even so much as taste what I made for you. I guess you don't trust me." I pouted, looking away from him. Hearing him sigh, and curse lightly under his breath.
"Magnus, you know that I-"
"No, no, no. You have made yourself perfectly clear. I can see how much our relationship truly means to you if you can't even try-"
"Ok fine! I'll try your burnt chicken and green pasta!" He grumbled. 'Drama queen…'
"Slightly burnt." I smiled at him, handing him a fork and pecking him on the cheek.
He glanced at me apprehensively, twirling the fork in the greenISH pasta, before carefully sliding the forkful into his mouth. The reaction was instantaneous. He gagged, shoving the plate into my hands, his face going as greenish as the pasta. Then, he babbled some nonsense about needing to use the restroom, and bolting out of the kitchen, where some very unromantic sounds started occurring.
I glared at the space where he stood moments ago, before hastily twirling the noodles along the disbanded fork, muttering.
"Men these days have the stomach capacity of queasy puppy"
Then I slid the fork in my mouth, soon having a similar, though, cleaner, reaction as my boyfriend.
I looked toward the bathroom said boyfriend disappeared in, calling.-
"I'll just poof up some Chinese food."
Hi response was gargled and cut off as he continued making a mess of my bathroom. Praying to Lilith he didn't get anything on my new shower curtains or pink furry toilet cover.
I looked over my kitchen, brownish water boiling over pots, smoke rising from various pots and pans', realizing maybe this type of romantic gesture wasn't the best for me to try.
I easily snapped away the mess, sending it to some garbage heap in Russia; before sighing to myself. Guess I'm not getting laid tonight.
My next idea was much more brilliant, as it should be, I haven't seen my beloved in an entire week due to some suffering clave meetings. But at least this gave me some time to put this plan into action.
It took a while, but not long after I snapped up all the roses I need, I easily made a pathway of gorgeous rose petals, leading from the entry way to the bedroom, where yours truly would be lying in wait, in the dark, the only light source flickering purple candles that filled the room with a nice, bitter, sandalwood smell.
I hear a familiar click of the unlocking door. The sound of Chairman Meow's purr echo through the apartment, Alec must be giving the small feline some attention.
'Let Chairman enjoy it while it lasts, soon all Alec's focus will be on me' I thought smugly. I watched as Alec's silhouette filled my doorway.
"Magnus?" His voice called, suspicious.
"Magnus what are all these flower petals doing-"He trailed off as a huge sneeze erupted from him, sending Chairman Meow yowling and barreling out of his arms.
"Alec?" I question, rising slowly from the sheets.
"I'm fine, I'm just- achoo!" He sneezed again, and again... and again.
"Are you okay darling?" I asked, moving beside my lover; pressing a hand to his shoulder.
"No I-" Man, my poor boy just can't get a word in.
"What is it?"
"I'm-"*breaks into another fit of sneezing* "I'm-"
"You're what Alexander? What?" I almost scream. What a way for this night to go huh.
"I'm allergic to roses you ass!" He all but growls as his face turns red, and not from the adorable blush I love, but from this sickly sneezing of his.
"Your… Allergic to roses. Roses?!" I ask incredulously. He glared at me, his blue eyes rimming red from irritation.
"I'm so sorry my allergies got in the way of your fucking plans."
I sigh sadly, snapping the roses away.
"It's just as much. You being allergic to the most romantic flower on earth." I tease.
He rolled his eyes at me.
"You think every cheesy cliché is romantic though Magnus, besides I prefer Angel's Trumpet flowers."
I look at him, wondering if he was serious.
"You do know those flowers are some of the most poisonous and lethal plants in the world right?"
He grinned at me, which under any other circumstance would have left me hot and bothered, but in this case, with his snotty nose, red face, and watery eyes, it looked quite comical.
"Of course, angels are always meant to look beautiful, but if you cross them you soon wish you hadn't.
I laughed at him; of course he would use that kind of logic, the little masochist. Or sadist I guess in this case.
"So, where did you poof all those rose petals anyway" He questioned, glacing up at me.
I grinned wickedly.
"Nowhere special."
*somewhere in the institute*
Jace rolled his shoulders, stretching the aching muscles. After a long day of training all he wanted was to collapse into his bed, well maybe that's not all he wanted, but Clary was out on some trip with her mother to the London institute to meet some ole shadowhunter friend of hers-
Jace stopped in his tracks, gapping in his room.
"Where the fuck did all these rose petals come from?"
As it turns out Alec wasn't to found of poetry either, much to my dismay. I just couldn't catch a break could I. How was I supposed to prove myself right and seduce this boy if he refused to succumb to my obvious charm and-
"Magnus, I don't care what you think. This is not real poetry." Alec smirked at me, waving the poem back in forth in my face.
"It very much is! It's not my fault if you can't appreciate true literature Alexander."
Alec chuckled.
"Excuse me for not finding any poetic genius in the lines,
'Your Blush is Red,
Your Eyes are Blue,
You Wear only Black,
But I still want to make love to you'
'And you're lucky I just replaced the oh so romantic word you used with the much sweeter phrase, making love."
I huffed, trying to grab the sheet away from him.
"If you hate it so much just let me snap it back into nonexistence then." I huff, sure I was being immature, but the day Alec tries to teach me a lesson on how to be romantic, I'm entitled to a few tantrums.
"No happing, now I have proof the great Magnus Bane isn't amazing at everything in the romantic regard." Alec smirked at me, where did this confidence come from. Where was my shy little shadowhunter who would sputter and blush by the mere suggestion of a compliment.
"You corrupted him." Alec laughed, only now did I realize I spoke out loud. I glare before spinning around, and walking away from my boyfriend who still lay on the couch laughing.
"If you want some lessons on proper sentence placement I could always-"
The rest of his sentence was cut off by a minor shriek of pain as I sent out a spark to shock that lovely ass of his. I turned and continued ignoring him as he growled some threat or another. Sure I wasn't getting laid tonight or probably anytime soon. But something's are more important than that; my romantic pride being one of them.
The rest of the month continued like that. I swear it was the longest month of my life. Having no sex was taking its toll on my hormone balance, not that Alec seemed to notice. Every attempt I have tried to cheesily romance him to bed ended in some mishap or another.
When I tried to show off a little dance for all, all that got out of him was saying, 'If I wanted to watch a girl dance Magnus, I'd be going to a strip club'. I do not dance like some girl. I just use more of my hips than most guys would, but what's dancing without some dramatic flair thrown into the mix.
I tried wearing Alec's clothes to bed, isn't a guy wearing their significant others clothes supposed to turn them on?' But all that did was make Alec look at me like I was an idiot, saying his shirt rose to high, and spread to wide. It's not my fault he's shorter and muscular.
I even when so far as sexting the boy, which is technically cheating, but I still wouldn't be touching him, but all that did was freak him out. He called it boring, and awkward. This coming from the most, arguably adorable, awkward man alive.
I swear, all of Lilith, Angles, God, and whatever deity is out there id trying to get me. Yes, they have all banded together, trying to make sure that I, Magnus Bane, don't get laid without touching Alec. It's exhausting I tell you.
"nus…." I turn to my pouting boyfriend. Who, I have admittedly, drowned out in my inner tirade. He smirked at me, pulling me close.
"Give up yet?" He asked.
"Never.." I growl.
He sighs, looking at me.
"I hate to prove you right."
"Well it happens often enough you should be used to it." I grin. Just then, alec smashes his mouth against mine, his lips wild, his tongue searching.
"You think you're the only one suffering here Magnus." He sighs into my mouth. Instead of answering I kiss him back as I lead him into the bedroom. Sure, I wasn't trying anything romantic or cheesy, but I still am having him bedded without touching him .I'm counting thi win.
Told you this chapter would be longer. ;)
Ugggg it's finally done after 4 hours of writing. If I don't get a review for this, no more Malec fluff! All you guys will get is Clary and Sebastian angst angst angst!
Anyway, please leave a review on what you liked about this chapter, and tell me which Magnus seducing attempt you liked best.
Please review!
Next chapter: Long Live (It's time for some Tessa and Jem shipping!)