Chapter 23: How Could You Hold On?
"Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.
-Raymond Lindquist
The sensation is like an enormous wave crashing over me, then receding back to the ocean. It feels so completely normal, so right, kind of like kissing Danny. Just letting the energy flow into me is an utterly natural feeling. I hold it there for an eternity of seconds, the power at my fingertips, and I could roll the balls of energy in my hands if I wanted to. As if I hold the entire world in the palm of my hand; a beautiful, yet frightening notion. Then, I gently let it trickle out. Into the people. So many people. I know each one of them as their faces pass through my memory like some long-lost friends that I have not seen in a while.
These people- they like the feeling. It refreshes and livens them, like placing a little ray of sunshine into their hearts. Many of them are exhausted, each for different reasons, but they all bask in the warmth of their little piece of gold.
At the end, I smile to myself. It was as if I were handing out candy to good friends that I have known my entire life, and now I have none left for myself. I vaguely feel like I am falling, down, down, into darkness.
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Where am I? This place is beautiful, wherever I am. Perhaps I am dead.
I hope not.
Danny steps forward from the shadows, his green eyes reflecting the warm sunshine. I throw my arms around him, kissing him, and oh, this feels so perfect- until we break away, breathless, collapsing onto the meadow grass.
Emma. This is a Dream.
I know.
You saved them. All of those people. Danny shakes his head. You are amazing. A miracle.
Tears of happiness well up in my eyes. Oh, Danny...
Would you like to be the Queen of K'un L'un? My queen?
Danny... you know I'll die.
Then be the queen while you are there. Please. Just for the time you spend in my homeland, however long that may be.
I roll over to face him, and am pleasantly surprised to see that, in this Dream, Danny is not blind. Our noses touch for a moment, then I find his lips have brushed mine.
Yes.
He scoops me up, into his lap, and I laugh. Danny!
What?
Oh, Danny.
Just close your eyes. Sleep for the hour.
Danny carefully shuts my eyelids, and I find myself in a state of drowsiness. How can one sleep while dreaming? I suppose this is a Dream, not a dream, though, and that would be why.
When I wake, I am still in the beautiful, endless meadow, but it is just past sunset. Danny?
Yes?
Why are you still here?
I am also Dreaming.
You're hurt, I accuse him. I can tell from his face that he is.
It was the rod. It left Magic of some sort behind. Black Magic.
Danny. No. You're going to live!
There are no guarantees in life, Emma. You of all people should know that.
Guiltily, I turn away from him. Why? Why can't I help him? The only thing I want is for him to be okay. I don't care if I live or die anymore, just that Danny is happy. Happy and alive.
And I would be happy if you were dead?
I don't know what to tell him now. I have to way to help him. I can't even wake up!
You have not tried.
What would be the point? You would be asleep, and I would have to explain to Nick how I did manage to use my powers without destroying just about everything. He won't be able to believe me. Then Ava, Luke, Peter, and Sam would just be waiting with me, waiting for you to get better. You know that's the way it would go. Anything I try won't work. Not on Magic. You know more Magic than I do. Is there anyone who can heal you?
Only time will tell.
I need ideas, Danny, ideas! Anything!
Why do we not just enjoy the serenity surrounding us for the time it shall last? Do not give me that look. If I had accepted death, would I have asked you to marry me?
THAT's what he asked me? Yes, oh, this feels utterly right.
Would you prefer to be wed in K'un L'un or here?
We don't need a ceremony. Just... know that I love you, 'kay? I will forever, even when I'm dead. You can, you know, find another girl, though, if you want. I understand.
We of K'un L'un believe that each man is blessed with one true, great love in his life. The monks do not approve of multiple relationships- they hardly allow one, and only for the few they deem deserving.
They deemed you 'deserving'?
I have not exactly... approached them, per say.
This will go over well, then.
Likely not. Though they shall soon see your beauty; it is not a question of if you are worthy, but if I deserve such a miracle.
Stop with the flattery! I can't help giggling, though, because Danny does not usually use such 'pretty' words.
Honesty should not be confused with flattery.
I blush. Well, exactly; that was obviously flattery! Danny laughs at me, and I join in.
Why are we so seemingly... 'immortal' in these Dreams?
They are Magic. Besides, Time is one of earth's greatest illusions.
It is. But... I sigh. I hate all this dying. I can feel it around me, surrounding me. Why do we have to die? Everything in Life is so bittersweet, nothing lasting long. People are dying, every day, and each of them had a name. They had lives, they had loved ones that they left behind. I know we should die when we are elderly and greet death with an open mind and ready heart, but why must so many die young? This isn't fair, life isn't fair, and I'm tired of it!
Everyone's time comes when they are ready.
No it doesn't! Look around you, Danny. Just look at you, look at me. I'm not ready to die!
I beg to differ. Of everyone that I know, you are the most prepared to greet death with an open mind and ready heart. You seem to have lived without regret; something which I cannot claim.
Accepting death is not the same as being ready to die!
Oh, but it is.
I sigh. I regret so much, Danny.
Yet if you had the option to go back in time and change those decisions, you would not.
Not most of them, no, because I somehow ended up with S.H.I.E.L.D. I wouldn't have gone to Central Park to think, though, that one time, and I wouldn't have walked anywhere near my old apartment... whenever that happened. If I hadn't done those two things, you wouldn't be blind and we wouldn't be having this conversation.
He may have kidnapped you anyways, and then perhaps you or I would have died. Those people- would they have given up so easily?
No. They wouldn't have. I wring my hands, tired of questioning the past. Would it have been so terrible if I had died there anyway? I lay down on the soft grass, staring at the pale blue sky.
Yes. It would have.
Danny stretches out beside me. Why?
Because then you would not be here. You would never come to K'un L'un. You would not speak to me again. You would not breath, or live. You would be dead. You would not kiss me, you would not-
Then what am I waiting for? I lean in, and as my lips press into his, a shiver runs up my back. We wrap our arms around each other, and I collapse into Danny's chest, absorbed by the rhythmical rise and fall.
Emma?
Yes?
He presses his mouth to my ear, whispering. The words fall into my ears, as gentle as the first summer drizzle of July, each raindrop resting on the top of my heart, and I hold them there, shimmering in their glory.
I love you.
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I sit up suddenly, gasping, sweat beading on my forehead. "Danny?" I cry, the words falling from my tongue before I can think.
"You're awake!" Ava exclaims.
"Where am I?" I say, squinting at the room. If I didn't know better, I would say that this is a room in the Tricarrier, but the Tricarrier blew up.
"The new Tricarrier."
"Wait, but-" I pause. "What even happened to the original Tricarrier?"
"I'll tell you later, okay?"
I frown. "What's wrong?"
"Oh, nothing."
"You're a really bad liar."
"Oh, shut the hell up already. Just get your ass up, and follow me. I don't care what shit Fury ordered."
I stare at Ava. What on earth could be this important? I stand up and, walking behind her, decide that I dare to inquire further. Panting from trying to keep up with Ava, I ask, "How long have I been out?"
"Two days. Long 'nuff," she grunts, turning a corner. Her grave expression as well as the fact that she is wearing her uniform tell me that this is serious. Ava refuses to answer any more of my questions, and my stomach fills with icy dread. Suddenly, she halts in front of a room, and, after pressing her finger onto the little passkey board, drags me into the infirmary.
The infirmary. No. Danny. Ava leads me to the very end of the corridor, towards a bed where he lies. Dying, of course. Surrounded by beeping machines, kept alive by these mechanical devices.
"Thought you should see him," Ava says quietly. "Fury gave me some shit about not letting you say goodbye. But I thought, well, that's a bunch of crap- we're not saying goodbye to anyone!" At the last part, though, her voice breaks, rising uncontrollably.
A lump forms in the back of my throat, and I cannot say anything for a moment as my eyes swell with unbidden tears. Ironic, isn't it, that only minutes ago, I was comforted by the rise and fall of his chest in a Dream, because it meant that he was close, but now, my only hope is that rising and falling, because it, and the monitor, are the only signs that his heart still pumps blood? Peter puts a hand on my shoulder, and I turn to see his tear stained face.
Peter, crying. The truth hits me with a sharp pang in my chest. "Nurse said he won't... won't go through the night," he chokes, the words catching in his throat. Terrible, evil, dark words.
Luke is leaning against the wall, his gaze directed at the floor, unmoving, like an enormous stone statue. Sam is slumped in a chair, blankly staring ahead, as if this isn't really happening. He won't believe Danny is gone until he's gone.
Neither will I.
Danny can't die. No.
There are no guarantees in life, Emma. His words haunt me.
I force myself to see this in a new light; there are no guarantees, so there is no guarantee that he will die. He will live. Danny is the immortal Iron Fist. He won't die, not yet. It is not his time. If I could, I would gladly exchange positions right now.
I hang back, not wanting to approach him. Admittedly, I am afraid; afraid of what I will see, what I will hear, but most of all, what I will feel. "You can close your eyes to the things you do not want to see but you cannot close your heart to the things you do not want to feel."
Trust. I need to trust Danny. He will not die. He will live. Every breath counts, each time his chest expands is a victory in itself.
Carefully, I sit down next to Sam, scooting closer to Danny. He is veiled by tubes and wires of all sizes, but I gently place his limp, pale hand in mine and squeeze it. I will never let him go.
So? Dearest readers, the fate of Daniel Rand, The Immortal Iron Fist, is at your fingertips.
Whether through review or Private Message (PM), you will decide if he shall live or die. The better/more your reasons (if you provide any), the more weight you will have in this decision. So please, tell me!
Even a simple "Live" or "die" will suffice, though I prefer if you explain your reasoning. Please! Imagine what will happen if you don't review and Danny lives/dies (whichever you * don't * want)- the horror! Anonymous review graciously accepted!
I know there are many readers out there who don't review- I watch my "views/visitors" as well as "follows/favorites"! Please! Just this once!
Bear in mind, though, that if Danny dies now, the opportunity for a more painful death is banished. After all, even if he lives through this, who says he won't die later? Or he could live happily ever after*.
Thank you.
-FFS
P.S. To leggo lover 99 & TheOnyxDragon12:
There shall be guts and gore; blood and pain (not necessarily in that order). There shall be death whether or not Danny survives. I guarantee it. Just sit tight while I set up the Greater Plot.
* Not likely. The odds, judging from previous reviews, are certainly against him. Plus thi authoress has her plot finished, and MUHAHAHA- *cough cough *.