Unbelievable

"You despicable man-"

"Male. I am not human and therefore cannot be a man..."

"How could you do that to Ditymus! And you acted as if you'd no idea!"

"You'd hit your head, love. I couldn't have you getting excited and hurting yourself further-"

"Liar!"

"Sarah!"

"No! Why on Earth did you turn him purple? He said a summons came in the form of a crystal but when he touched it, the crystal changed him instead of taking him to your throne room. Why would you revert him back to an Above fox yet you let him keep his mind? You could have given him a heart attack. He's old dang it! Jareth don't spring tricks like that on him out of no where!"

"My only mistake was not sealing his magic too."

"Jareth!"

"He is one of my subjects, Sarah. How I punish my subject for insubordination is none of your concern."

"Insubordination! What in the heck could a fox a fourth your size have done!"

"...That is none of your concern."

"Jareth…"

"Don't sigh like that, precious. You sound like my mother… Shall we have our lesson?"

"Why yes, your majesty, let us have our lesson."

"Must you continually wound me with your sarcasm."

"I'm sorry, do past wounds still pain you?"

"Even greater was the pain of your rejection, I will never get over that."

"You're unbelievable… I'm tired of learning etiquette and protocol. Can we go over history again?"

"You are progressing well with both Fae and Goblin etiquette, I had planned to go over Elven today."

"Gwenhwyfar and Mahthildis have been teaching me Elven and Nymph etiquette."

"You still meet with them?"

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I?"

"... Have they said anything more about my supposed courting of you?"

"Not really, no… Actually nothing beyond when we first met and that was weeks ago. Why?"

"No reason…"

"Whatever, Jareth. So can we go beyond the basics of history and go in depth to the Black Cluck Rebellion?"

"That's Black Luck Rebellion."

"Really? Some of the goblins told me it was the 'Black Cluck Rebellion.'"

"That would have been some of the lesser goblins then. I wouldn't take their word on anything, Sarah. They mean well but they get easily excited and confused."

"You and I both know you're only making excuses because your grandfather won a rebellion with a bunch a' black chickens?"

"You, my dear, will never repeat that in my presence again."

"You do realize that for every history lesson you've given me, I've gone and gotten your subjects view of the same event, right? Ditymus gives me an unprejudiced view of both sides of a battle or war and the reasons why either side went into battle in the first place. Hoggle tells me the what it was like for the common folk in any event and your lesser goblins show me the humor in it all."

"Such a pity that forbidding you from doing something just ensures that you go out and do it…"

"I'm not that bad!"

"When I want you to do something all I have to do is tell you not to."

"I do not!"

"Sarah dear, do you really want me to list off examples?"

"...So history please."

"I think it best we continue with etiquette and protocol."

"Aww, come on. With Mahthildis and Gwenhwyfar teaching me as well I think I've learned enough to not make a fool of myself or my teachers at the ball-"

"Ball?"

"I got an invitation to some dude's ball, Gwenhwyfar and Mahthildis were so happy that I was going too, they started teaching me double time to get me ready for Iain's-"

"Iain! The Seelie High King?"

"Yeah, I got an invitation to his end of summer ball a few days ago."

"How was it address?"

"What?"

"How was it addressed? What titles did he use? What names!"

"Woah, calm down-"

"Sarah-"

"I don't remember off the top of my head, the invite is on my desk-"

With a quick wave of his hand, the invitation was in his hand, "to Sarah Williams, Conqueror of the Labyrinth, Dwarf Haggler, Rock Caller Friend, Bridge Destroyer, Goblin City Invader, Goblin Castle Demolisher and Honorary Goblin…I didn't know you went by such titles Sarah-"

"I don't, I looked them over but didn't see implications in the placement and names, as you taught me there could be, so I ignored them and got on with reading the rest of it…"

"Indeed…"

"Jareth, what's going on?"

"Did you accept this invitation?"

"With all the lessons I've had, we both know what not accepting would have meant for a human that really only has 'Conqueror of the Labyrinth' going for her and nothing else."

"You forgot dumb luck, conqueror with a highly unhealthy dose of dumb luck."

"Unhealthy for other people maybe."

"Don't mutter, precious… I wouldn't mind seeing you demolish his palace."

"I'm sure you'd love that, Jareth, but I'd rather not create enemies for myself. Jareth, what is wrong with me accepting the invitation?"

"He's given no indication that he's any idea of the rumors going on in my kingdom about us, which is good, very good… We're going to change your lessons. This male is not to be trusted."

"For that to come from you is saying something-"

"Sarah, if he finds out that you and I are even friends, he'll do all in his power to turn you against me."

"Jareth, we started out as enemies, I seriously doubt there is anything he could do or say that could turn me against you after recovering from being enemies…"

"I love you."

"Your sarcasm doesn't have the same power, sorry. So what kind of lessons will I be getting now?"

"Self-defense, skills in the undertones and meanings of court language, along with love potion and other toxins identification. I'll have Ditymus start building your immunity."

"Seriously! Why- "

"Seriously."

"Jareth-"

"We've one month to get you ready for the prettier side of war. Continue your lessons with those elven ladies, keep your other lessons secret."

"But-"

"No arguments, lets go."

Jareth marched off down the hall leaving a confused Sarah in his wake with no choice but to follow the irate Goblin King, so follow she did.