A/N: It's been far too long once again. I'm so sorry. I've been terribly distracted by Pokémon X and now I'm about to be distracted by Rune Factory 4 orz It's not exactly a good thing either because my semester finals are in one month's time... I promise to try to update before I start my hardcore revision for my finals.
As always, thank you so much for supporting Gameplay! :)
April 20, 2013
"-Well, that's basically the gist of it."
"..."
"The current plan is to just observe how he'll be doing for the next day or so, assuming his condition doesn't deteriorate suddenly. There's no telling when exactly Orihara-kun might recover. It may take days, weeks, maybe even months. But according to Father's recount of his experience in Tatsumi Port Island, there's a chance he might not even recover at all."
Shizuo made a noncommittal sound.
Shinra, who pretended not to have heard that, continued, "Celty and I will take turns watching him, and I'll try to remain at home during this critical period in case something does happen. Of course, I'm not saying that I hope for that, but since the degree of severity of Apathy Syndrome can fluctuate with no prior warning, I have to be here to keep Orihara-kun's vitals up." A pause. "And resuscitate him too, if necessary."
Shizuo slowly turned to face the underground doctor. "…That bad?"
"More than you and the others think." Shinra shrugged. "Well, there's nothing else I can say to convince you, if you're still skeptical."
"I'm not doubting you, I just-" Shizuo paused, the images of the Midnight Channel flashing through his mind. He looked away, directing his gaze to the semi-conscious informant on the bed. "...I just can't believe the flea went down just like that."
Shinra nodded with a thoughtful hum. "That's understandable. Anyone who knows who Orihara Izaya is and what he is capable of would be surprised to see him like this. Though it had always been a matter of time before Orihara-kun got his just desserts, really. Perhaps this is it."
Shizuo said nothing in response.
After a short moment of silence, Shizuo inched towards the side of the bed until he could take a closer look. His frown remained in its place, expression unchanging even as his eyed and brain registered the presence of the sickly flea before him. Shizuo merely stood there, watching the rhythmic rise and fall of Izaya's chest and listening to the stable beeping of the machine recording Izaya's heart rate.
It was such a surreal sight that Shizuo thought he was dreaming. This was Izaya, of all people, lying motionless like a corpse before him. Over the past decade, Shizuo had hurled countless vending machines, trash cans, letter boxes - things that were fully capable of causing fatal injuries - at him, and the flea could take them and jump back to his feet like nothing happened. Yet now, he was reduced to such a state after some random stranger tossed him into a TV? Just what exactly was in there that could make even the flea turn out like this?
The only answer that Shizuo could give himself came in the form of his memories of the Midnight Channel resurfacing in his mind.
"Hey, Shinra?"
"Yes? What is it?"
Shizuo didn't reply immediately. Instead he took a moment to contemplate further, after realising that he had asked the question without giving it any thought at all. Once he decided on how to phrase his words, Shizuo tilted his head to the side slightly and said, "When it was midnight... Did you see anything show up on your TV?"
"If you're referring to Izaya being suffocated by a large black mass made up of those Shadow creatures, then yes, I did. In fact I was - and still am - surprised that I couldn't find any strangulation marks on him when Souji-kun and his friends brought him in."
"...How the hell can you say that so calmly like it's got nothing to do with you?"
"Because that's precisely it. It has nothing to do with me." Without paying any attention to whatever Shizuo's reaction might have been, Shinra went on to say, maintaining his detached tone, "At this moment, Orihara-kun is simply a patient under my care. Nothing more, nothing less. To attach some kind of emotional value to a patient would prevent a doctor from discharging his duties professionally. So if you want me to give him the best treatment possible, I have to keep an objective viewpoint."
"Bullshit. You just don't want Celty to see that you're worried about the flea. You know that she doesn't exactly like him, so you're pretending that you don't care."
"Well, I won't deny that. And I won't confirm that, either." Shinra shifted his spectacles up the bridge of his nose. "But more importantly, what you said got me curious, Shizuo-kun. What brought on this concern you're feeling for Izaya all of a sudden? Haven't you always hated him? Why question my attitude towards his current predicament, if that's the case?"
Shizuo snapped, "I'm not worried about the flea. I'm pissed that you can be so indifferent to him and still call yourself his friend."
Shinra sighed. "Like I said before, Orihara-kun is more of a bad acquaintance who stuck than a friend to me. It's no surprise that I can be indifferent towards him. Honestly I can't wait till I'll finally be free of him."
"Can you just stop referring to the flea by two different names and stick to one, by the way? You've been interchanging between 'Orihara-kun' and 'Izaya' all this while and it's starting to get on my nerves."
"I don't see where you're coming from. Don't you occasionally call Orihara-kun by name on top of calling him a 'flea'? It doesn't really bother anybody that much, so why are you so bothered by how I choose to call him?"
Shizuo looked like he was about to retort, but decided against it in the end, seeing that his current debate with Shinra was going nowhere. Instead he sighed, and turned his back on the underground doctor.
The tense silence that descended lasted for a long time, though Shizuo couldn't tell how long exactly. But when he finally decided that it lasted long enough, he turned, but found that Shinra was nowhere to be seen. He had somehow left the room without Shizuo realising it - or perhaps Shizuo was too bothered by their earlier argument that he didn't notice Shinra leaving. Either way, Shinra had left him alone with Izaya in the room at some point in time. Whether it was out of exasperation from dealing with him or because of the misconception that he came to visit the flea, Shizuo didn't know.
All he did know, was that he had made the crazy decision to come here for some unknown reason, Izaya was probably doomed to a life of lying in bed and muttering gibberish, and Shinra was being an unnaturally apathetic bastard. And that, ironically enough, it was a bunch of kids who knew next to nothing about the flea that were worried sick about the flea.
It didn't make sense. Everything about this didn't make sense.
Shizuo ran his hand through his hair but said nothing as he kept his eyes on Izaya. Then, just as quietly, he turned and left, closing the door behind him.
And all was silent in the room, except for the beeping of the heart monitor measuring Izaya's pulse rate; the only piece of convincing evidence that he was still alive as he laid unconscious, completely unresponsive to the world around him.
The early Saturday morning passed with no incident. In particular, nothing sudden happened to Orihara-san during the period of time the Investigation Team members spent recuperating from rushing through the entire dungeon. At least, nobody received any notification from Kishitani-sensei about the raven's latest condition.
Just as she had promised, Celty-san sent them back to their respective residences - the boys to Souji's and the girls to Naoto's - after they had given the long recount of their experiences in the TV world back in Inaba and everything they knew about Shadows and Personas, among many other things. It had been rather difficult to get the rest they deserved, knowing about Orihara-san's condition and the fact that it was their responsibility, but the weariness from the time spent inside the TV quickly caught up with them eventually.
When they next opened their eyes, the sun had already risen, showering upon the citizens of Ikebukuro with its cool spring warmth and light. For the few moments following that, all was normal for the members of the Investigation Team. They washed up or had a fresh change of clothes, and checked their refrigerators and ate their breakfast. For some, they made a short trip to the nearest convenience store to stock up on bread and drinks.
After the usual morning business was done, the team temporarily went on their separate ways as they embarked on their own schedules: Souji and Yosuke headed down to Raira University; Chie left to help Heiwajima-san out on his job; Kanji tried to catch up on his academic work by checking the emails he received from Naoki about what he missed; Rise went to entertain the press; Naoto stayed at home to do some research, and Yukiko and Teddie took this opportunity to pay Orihara-san a visit.
All in all, it was a relatively peaceful morning.
But that illusionary sense of serenity vanished when they gathered at a large enough table at the Raira University campus canteen, after Souji and Yosuke's lessons ended, to discuss further the situation at hand.
"...How is he?" Yosuke started the discussion by asking.
"The same as when we found him," Yukiko replied, casting her eyes downward. "But he's stable. Physically speaking."
"...Oh. Well. That's, um..."
Yosuke trailed off, leaving behind a silence that nobody else felt like breaking.
Realising this, the young manager quickly shook her head. "I-I'm not saying that he's not. M-mentally, I mean. It's just..." Her fingers curled into fists on her lap. "...Kishitani-sensei said that he's studied previous cases of Apathy Syndrome that took place four years ago. All of the patients who recovered shared one thing in common, and that was the fact that they couldn't remember anything during the period of time they were suffering from the condition. But they do remember vague memories of what had happened right before they started suffering from it."
"And these are often memories of seeing pools of blood and coffins, or being in a strange room with walls that were bleeding...as well as something like a thick, black shadow trying to suffocate them," Naoto elaborated. When the attention turned towards her, she briefly explained, "I have been doing my own reading as well."
Rise drew in a sharp breath. "Wait. Are you saying that these people and Orihara-san are...?"
"They were traumatised," Souji answered calmly.
"Precisely," Naoto said, nodding. "It's likely, considering the unpredictably violent nature of Shadows, that they might have been slowly torturing their victims by suffocating them while implanting images associated with death in their minds...or even possibly flooding the victims' minds with all the negativity that the Shadows are made up from. As a result, the victims…" Naoto ended off with a sigh.
Rise paled, more so than the others did. With a Persona like Kanzeon, who possessed purely advanced Scanning abilities, she would know more than anyone else on the team - with Teddie being a possible exception - the extent to which the horrifying feeling of analysing a Shadow would have on a Scanner.
If she had to describe it, she would describe it as having to sieve through the raw rush of negative emotions - the ones that stood out most were anger, sorrow, and pity, all of which were mostly directed at oneself - and the memories of events that led up to the buildup of such negativity. It was frightening and cold... But most importantly, it was saddening. Knowing that these were a representation of somebody's darkest, most private emotions made the entire process seem even more uncomfortable for Rise.
And when she imagined all of that strong, powerful negativity creeping into her mind and eventually overpowering it...
"That's horrible..." Rise mumbled, not knowing whether it was a reply to Naoto's claim or a just subconscious comment on her part. But it was most likely both.
"So that's what happens when your Shadow tries to kill you?" Kanji asked, looking just as unsettled. "Stuffs your mind with all the horrible shit till you literally shut down? If that's not messed up, I don't know what is."
The rest of the team turned to stare at him with expressions of mild surprise. When he realised that nobody had spoken after he did, and that everybody wouldn't look away from him, Kanji nearly fidgeted in his seat. "...What?" he said with uncertainty tracing his voice. "Was it somethin' I said?"
"I never thought of it that way," Naoto replied, regarding Kanji with a sense of admiration. In just a matter of days, the bespectacled young man had left quite the impression on the fifth in the Shirogane line of detectives, a stark contrast to the image of mystery and utter perplexity she once had of him for a little under two years.
'Has he always been this perceptive?' Naoto wondered. She thought back to her interactions with Tatsumi, but could only recall his strange words and shifty behaviour which usually made her confused. 'But even so, that doesn't mean he isn't.'
Kanji's question brought Naoto back to the present. "Never thought of...what that way?" He frowned slightly. The stares were becoming more annoying and unsettling with each passing second to him.
Naoto made eye contact with Kanji, being careful not to be reabsorbed in her own thoughts. "The possibility that that is exactly how the Shadows kill their victims," she answered. "During that period of time two years ago, all of us had been so focused on solving the case that we never once questioned how the Shadows killed their victims exactly, or the reasoning behind the state and location the bodies were found in after they had died in the TV world. We simply invested our time and energy into solely finding the perpetrator, thinking that by doing so we would have been seeking the truth, but in reality, there are still so many questions that have been left unanswered all this while. And we never realised it."
"Of course... That must be why this is all happening again." Yukiko lowered her gaze. "All along, we thought we had solved the case, but the truth is...we didn't. And someone - the true culprit - took advantage of that." A look of shame and guilt crossed her features. "And because of our carelessness, Orihara-san is now..."
"I know how you feel, Yukiko," Chie spoke soothingly, in spite of the similar, creeping guilt that she tried to ignore. "But beating ourselves up over something that's happened won't accomplish anything. What's done is done. Just... Just don't think about it anymore."
"What Satonaka said," Yosuke agreed. He looked across the table, meeting everyone's eyes. "I know, it's hard to ignore that we're responsible for what happened and that it's a really crappy feeling. But listen, guys. Don't forget, Orihara-san is still alive. Shouldn't that be something we oughtta be happy about? Even just a little? I mean, when we finally got to him, we didn't think he'd make it, but look at him now. He's still hanging in there. Shouldn't we be doing the same?"
"There are still some doubts we need to clarify," Souji added. "Finding the answers to them may lead us to a way to cure Orihara-san of his Apathy Syndrome. We don't have time to reproach ourselves. If we're truly sorry, then all the more we need to focus on our investigation."
The table was silent again as its occupants pondered over those words of encouragement. Then they nodded, but it still wasn't an easy agreement.
"We need to start right from the beginning," Naoto spoke from her own experience. "What did we miss? What didn't we see? There's no doubt that what we're facing now is linked to the case in Inaba, so anything, even the smallest detail, might be vital. Therefore, I urge everyone, including myself, to think back to what happened in Inaba, and see if there was anything amiss that we didn't address."
"Well, that's easy enough, come to think of it," Yosuke said, sparking off the list of unanswered questions that the team compiled by the end of their discussion.
For one thing - there was Teddie and his unexplained disappearance.
Even Teddie himself didn't exactly know, let alone begin to understand, what had happened to him at that time.
When the rest of the team, sans Souji, asked him about it, Teddie could only give a simple answer to the best of his ability: that he, being a Shadow, had to return to the Shadow World, believing that to be the solution to Nanako's condition. But where he had ended up, and how he could have gone there - and, for Souji, why Teddie wound up in the Velvet Room - were details Teddie didn't know of.
Following this was, naturally, the big question about Nanako's condition in the first place.
What was she suffering from, exactly? The doctor could only provide evasive answers though it certainly wasn't his fault, seeing that the condition stemmed from an exposure to the TV world, something an ordinary person wouldn't normally know about. Teddie had mentioned once that since Nanako was a child, she was probably more sensitive to the effects of the fog, but what were these effects, then? Could it be to turn normal people into Shadows, as Adachi had said? But why would age be a factor if the fog was meant to turn everyone, regardless of their age, into Shadows?
That meant there could have been another reason for Nanako's peculiar condition, but then that begged the question: What was it? Souji suggested that it might have had been due to her cold back then, which did make sense as the fog could have simply aggravated her cold, causing her to become so sickly. An unintended effect of the fog, probably. But until they found concrete evidence, this would not go beyond a mere conjecture on the team's part.
Combining the two major questions together led to another: Why would Teddie's disappearance result in Nanako's miraculous recovery?
Or was it even because of Teddie's disappearance at all?
Once the Investigation Team had these few questions to ponder about, the others came naturally.
The sudden appearance of the Malevolent Entity.
What the Malevolent Entity's purpose was; how deeply involved he was in the murder case, or if he was even involved at all.
The fact that they weren't the only Persona-users in the world - and the fact that their Personas worked rather differently from the other users' they met.
Robots that were designed to wield Personas; the existence of corporations that designed and created these robots.
There were so many questions, so many doubts, that the more they discussed, the more confused and lost the team got until Souji decided to put an end to it.
"I think we have more than enough to start on for now," he said. "Let's try to sort our thoughts out first before we move on."
And so on that note the Investigation Team resumed their discussion, the only thing they could do at this point in time while clinging onto the hope that the latest victim to the case would be able to make it through.
'...Again.'
A cold gust of wind. A giddying sensation.
'I'm here at this place...again...'
Here in the world of nothing but dense, white fog.
When he tried to take a step like he always did, however, he found his foot meeting the air.
Shaking the dizziness away, he glanced down, and saw that his feet were not touching solid ground.
That was when he noticed the drunken feeling of something akin to floating in the clouds.
It was such a soothing sensation that he couldn't help but fully immerse himself in the therapeutic energy, like falling backwards into a swimming pool and allowing the water pull him in.
"Sleep..."
He heard the familiar voice whisper to him, as though the stranger was right beside him.
And then, as if the voice had just muttered a spell, all he saw was darkness.
When he next came to, he found himself staring at a ceiling dyed deep sapphire blue, lying on some soft, velvet material directly on his back.
"Ah, are you awake?"
A woman's voice had spoken.
Turning his head, he strained to look at the blonde dressed in blue sitting on a cushion stool across him.
"Do not worry. My master has gone on an errand, and he won't be returning so shortly. He is unaware that I have called you here. We may have our conversation in peace."
Groggily, he pushed himself up into an upright position, and nodded as if he understood what the woman was referring to.
"I called you here because I have a question I'd like to ask you," she said. "But first, I must apologise."
He stared at her in confusion, choosing to remain silent as a prompt for her to continue.
"It is in relation to the vision you had seen," the blonde explained vaguely. "The world that you saw - the expanse of white and fog... That is what lies beyond the boundaries of the Velvet Room."
Souji's eyes widened slightly, but when he thought further about this, it all started to make sense.
Why he had found the place familiar; why his strange dreams of late occurred only when there were new developments to the case.
He had been drifting into the realm that served as the transition between the real world and the Velvet Room all along.
"However," Margaret continued, "it is not a place where a human soul such as your own can freely tread upon without any consequences. If I had noticed any later, there would have been grave ramifications to your soul, and that is simply not acceptable."
"...But I don't understand," Souji said, after remaining silent all this while. "Why are you apologising? I should be thanking you for noticing and saving me before anything bad happened."
"The fact that I failed to notice the abnormality earlier remains, dear guest. The only reason your soul is still intact is because my master is the one who had been pulling you back in in the previous occurrences." Margaret lowered her gaze to the Le Grimoire she held on her lap. "Before my master left on his errand, he reminded me to keep vigilant, and to ensure the integrity of your soul should anything out of the ordinary happen. Yet I did not even detect your presence until I felt a disturbance in your soul. If I had been any later... Well, even my master does not know what would become of you, then."
Souji said nothing.
There was something about Margaret's tone; her expression and language that oddly reminded him of someone. Someone familiar.
'Naoto.'
She was the first to come to mind.
The way Shirogane had been acting out of sorts lately, especially when Orihara-san was involved. Struggling to keep her emotions in check, making sure she wasn't making irrational decisions or being too sentimental; making sure she remained objective, just as her profession required her to be. Sandwiched between her obligation and personal feelings.
The way she shouldered all the blame when misfortune struck him, refusing to forgive herself and doing all she could to compensate him. Being so unnecessarily hard on herself when the fault clearly didn't lie on her alone, or even at all.
Naoto was very much like Margaret in those regards.
But while Souji could never tell for sure whether Margaret did so much for him out of duty or otherwise, he was certain that Naoto had long overstepped her boundaries as a detective from the very beginning. Not just for Orihara alone, but also for the team by accepting the case that the Ikebukuro police force proposed to her.
It wasn't something he felt he had the right to comment on, however.
"...I see. So it was the Wheel of Fortune, after all."
Souji blinked out of his stupor.
Faint red lighted Margaret's cheeks. "Ah, my apologies. I understand this...'ability' of mine may still be too uncomfortable a notion for you, but..."
"No, it's not that," Souji replied politely. "It's just... What did you mean by 'after all'? Did you and Igor know from the start that Naoto...?"
The blush instantly vanished as Margaret quickly regained her composure. "That is something I am not allowed to elaborate at this time," she said. "However, I can tell you this... You must look beyond what lies in front of you."
"What lies...in front of me?" Souji glanced to the floor before he looked up into the blonde's sharp, golden eyes. "Like how this isn't the real Velvet Room, and is only a fraction of it?"
"What you can see may just be part of a bigger truth, or part of an equally large lie," Margaret said, neither agreeing nor disagreeing with Souji's claim, "but remember this, dear guest: without that very piece, what you would know as a truth or lie will cease to exist...and another will take its place."
"..."
"...I've said too much, it seems."
Souji's vision started to blur.
"Ah, how timely. It seems that you are beginning to awaken in the human world."
'What...? Already?'
There were still so many things he didn't understand, so many things he wanted to know.
"Well then, until next time, my dear-"
"Wait."
Despite the familiar dizziness, Souji remained lucid enough to speak.
Margaret stared back at him coolly, awaiting whatever he wanted to say.
"Didn't you tell me that there was something you wanted to ask?" Souji raised a hand to his head. "What...was it...?"
Margaret smiled.
"It has already been answered."
And then, before Souji could think of replying, his consciousness drifted away.