[A/N: Haha! I have updated on time! It's like I have backlogged chapters and a clear shot to the end of this series. It's crazy. Also: I really do appreciate constructive criticism, but I can't improve anything if you're not specific. So if there is something I got wrong, let me know so I can fix it. Thankie mucho. Don't forget to review].

Chapter Nineteen: Like We're Gonna Die Young

I was desperately trying to focus once we were trying to get things up and running. I was starting to think that I probably should have eaten, maybe that was what was wrong with me. But then the feeling of discomfort that was plaguing I started to immediately recognize was that familiar feeling of something horrible happening.

"If Buu is there, we can't just give up. We have to at least try to stop him," Gohan said.

I could hear what they were all saying, but I was having trouble staying focused on anything other than the overwhelming panic that was plaguing me.

"What we really need to overcome is everyone's inability to destroy the hybrids on their own," Kisuke said.

"What are we supposed to do about that?" Yusuke asked.

I could hear them going on about their suggested plan—Yusuke had the Spirit Wave technique. If he wasn't an idiot and could use it correctly now, he should have no trouble taking out a hybrid on his own. Since it used the evil inside of people against them, he could effectively take a hybrid out the same way he would take out a human, but also purify it of its hollowfication the same way a zanpakto did. And then there was my dad with the Spirit Bomb which was always effective. If Buu was there they'd stand the best chance of taking him out.

They were all good ideas, though Yusuke and my dad would only have one shot at both attacks and it would take massive amounts of energy, and since my dad and Yusuke both had less than perfect track records with their attacks, a plan C for Buu was needed.

"Kairi," I heard my name suddenly. I looked over to the source of it. Kuwabara. "What about that attack you used at Maze Castle."

That was certainly a good thought on Kuwabara's part. That attack could be used to directly attack someone's spirit energy. That would be a way to destroy a hybrid—but it would destroy it rather than purify it, much like the way Uryu, a Quincy would. Although, in the grand scheme of things, it was probably not going to throw the balance off any more than it already had.

But there was an issue.

"It would take way too much energy," Dad chimed in before I could, already knowing that problem would be.

"He's right," I said. "Instead of splitting it up into two attacks like I did at Maze Castle, to make it more stable I meshed it all together into one, but I have to continuously dump out my energy into the attack for it to have the same effect. For someone as powerful as Buu, it'd be way to risky," I said.

"And by too risky you mean. . ." Yusuke started.

"I'd be dumping out energy way too fast, to the point where I couldn't stop it," I said. "And then boom. Dead."

"Yeah, and I'm thinking we'd like to avoid any more casualties if possible," Yusuke said.

"Especially ones that can't come back by way of the Dragon Balls," Goten said.

"That just means you have to get it right the first time," Genkai said.

I was still feeling uncomfortable, and now slightly light headed. The stress of my feeling of impending doom was starting to get to me. Was something bad about to happen right now? I hadn't felt this sick to my stomach since we'd been in the cave and I was waiting for Yusuke to die. Except this time, I didn't know what to expect at all.

"You okay?" Ichigo whispered down to me.

I wanted to nod, lie to him, tell him that I was fine, but I knew he wouldn't buy it. But my front didn't last long anyway. I felt my knees start to get weak. My vision became spotty. I was aware of my body hitting the ground, but nothing else.

I could hear Ichigo and Yusuke desperately calling out my name. They sounded so far away. And I felt so weak, weaker than I could ever recall being, and I just kept feeling weaker and weaker. But all I saw was darkness.

I was aware that I wasn't lying on the ground at the Lookout—I was predicting something.

All of my other senses were gone except for the two voices calling out to me, and the feeling weakness that had taken over.

And then nothing.

There was nothing for a while until I opened my eyes, no longer caught in the middle of a vision. I was at the Lookout. I'd been moved from the floor outside, inside to a bed.

I moved to sit up, but I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Slow down there," Mom said. I looked around the room. They were all there—my parents, my brother, Hiei, Yusuke, Kuwabara, Yukina, Ichigo. They all seemed worried.

I was worried. I was still trying to make sense of what I'd seen—or what I hadn't seen.

"You okay?" Dad asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said. I was feeling fine now. Even the nasty feeling I'd had before I hit the floor had gone away. I sat up, gently pushing my mom's hand away.

"You were out for half an hour. Are you sure you're okay?" Yusuke pressed on.

"Yeah. I have no idea what that was," I said. I didn't know why I wasn't telling them about the vision. Probably because I hadn't known what I'd seen. "Maybe I had my knees locked for too long."

"That sounds like something stupid you would do," Goten said, rolling his eyes, finding this answer completely plausible. Everyone else seemed to buy it too.

Except Hiei. He alone seemed unconvinced, which was troublesome. Did he know something I didn't?

"Well pull it together. We're shipping out in 30 minutes whether you're functioning or not," Yusuke said.

"I'll be ready," I said.

My mom gave me a gentle pat on the back before she, dad, and the others left the room. Except Ichigo.

"Don't look so concerned. It's not the first time I've been unconscious," I said. "I'm sure it won't be the last."

Ichigo shook his head. "You're just. . . You're different today."

"Different?" I asked.

"I get it—the universe is ending, so I get that you're freaking out," he said.

"But?" I asked.

"But. . . I'm getting the feeling that you know more about what's going to happen than the rest of us," he said.

"Why would you think that?" I asked.

"Because you're being so negative," he said. "It's like you know something bad is going to happen so, it doesn't matter."

"Even if I had seen something, I still lean towards the optimistic side of things," I said.

"But it's not something you've seen. You feel like something bad is going to happen—you said that happens don't you?" Ichigo asked. I nodded. "So maybe you know more than you think you do."

I paused as I thought this over.

What could I know that would make me react so badly? What had I seen? What was it about that vision that had put me on the floor? I hadn't seen anything. Only darkness. . .

But could that really be the answer.

"Do you know where Bardock?" I asked.

"He was hanging around a while ago," Ichigo said. "Don't know where he's at now."

"I'll find him," I said getting to my feet.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Ichigo asked.

I nodded. "I'll be fine."

I walked past him and started hunting through the Lookout for the only person who'd be able to definitively tell me what I saw. Bardock. Clearly, what I had seen was what he had seen, so he'd be able to confirm the thought that was growing in the back of my mind.

I found him inside, by himself.

"Took you long enough," he said. "You figure it out yet?"

I nodded. "I'm not gonna make it am I?"

Bardock shook his head. "Nope. It's a shame isn't it?"

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked.

"What's the point? I knew you'd see for yourself," Bardock said. "It's the kind of thing I think you should probably come to terms with on your own anyway."

I shook my head. "What am I supposed to do?"

"You'll know when the time comes," he said. "But what you really want to know is if you should even say anything."

"Should I?" I asked.

"You save everyone, kid," Bardock said. "Remember that. Everyone gets out of this except you and only because of you."

"I could explain that to everyone a million times and they'd still never be okay with it," I said.

"Then don't say anything," Bardock said. "Do what you've got to do. What they don't know won't hurt them."

I shook my head. "That doesn't feel right. It's selfish."

"What good will come from telling them the truth? They'll spend all of their time trying to protect you instead of what really matters," Bardock said.

I nodded. He was right. Of course there was always the possibility that I might be wrong this time. That what I saw might not come to pass. That I might actually make it out of it alive. Of course, when it came down to it I'd throw myself under the bus to save everyone. I'd do it without even thinking about it. If it was me or them I'd choose me, every time.

"Did you know you weren't going to make it when Frieza blew up Vegeta?" I asked.

"Not until the end. . . Of course I probably should've seen it coming given the planet exploding and all," Bardock said. "At least you know it's coming."

"Sometimes it's better not knowing," I said.

"I think you're finally starting to see things my way, kid," he said. "Good luck."

He walked away, leaving me standing alone in the empty corridor. I wondered what was going to happen, how it was going to happen. I didn't want to leave my friends and my family. I didn't want to hurt them knowing I couldn't come back. We'd lived in a world where death had no consequences attached to them for a long time. But now I couldn't come back.

"Detective."

I looked over and saw that Hiei had joined me.

"You're not here to check up on me are you? I'm totally fine," I said, dismissively.

"Are you?" Hiei asked.

"Why would I lie?" I asked.

"Why indeed," Hiei said.

"How about you stop beating around the bush and just come out with it," I said.

"I know what you saw," Hiei said.

"I didn't see anything," I lied.

"Bullshit," Hiei said. "Are you planning on keeping it to yourself?"

I nodded. "No point in getting everyone all freaked about something they have no control over. I can try. I can watch. . . I can wait to see what'll happen. . . But if I see an opportunity to save everyone I'm not going to hesitate."

"Because you're an idiot," Hiei said.

"I know you find the idea of giving up your life save someone else reprehensible, but I don't," I said.

"It's different if that's what you're expecting to do," Hiei said. "Would you be so okay with the idea of dying if you didn't have time to contemplate it before hand?"

"I was the Spirit Detective, Hiei. Dying to save everyone is always a plan I carry around in my back pocket," I said. "You saw my performance at the Dark Tournament."

"And it was just that—a performance. You had no intention of dying that day," Hiei said.

"And I don't today either. I'm just. . . More prepared for the worst than I usually am," I said.

". . . And you're not upset by this?" Hiei asked.

I shrugged. "I've been dead before, obviously. It's not like I don't know what to expect. What upsets me is my family. . . How will they take it knowing that this time I won't come back? I almost feel selfish for entertaining the thought, but I know if—when I'm in that situation I'm not going to back down if it means saving everyone. And I shouldn't have too many regrets about it."

"You shouldn't have many?" Hiei asked.

"I don't know exactly what I wanted out of life now that I'm not detective anymore, but there were always a few things I knew I wanted, however they were supposed to fit in. I wanted to finish high school so I could make my mom happy. I wanted to do something worthwhile with this power that I have. I wanted to fall in love and get married and have a family. I think I'll regret those things a little," I said.

There was silence for a moment before Hiei spoke again. ". . . Do you love the Soul Reaper?"

I took a deep breath. "I think that love is this weird thing that kind of starts off as something small and then kind of grows into something else. Every day, I think I feel that a little more for Ichigo the more time I spend with him, but I don't think I'm in love with him. I think I might've loved Trunks because I've had my whole life to have whatever was between us grow and I think there will always be a part of me that does love him. But I haven't known Ichigo long enough to be able to say I feel that way." She looked over to Hiei. "And then there's you of course."

He stared at me curiously, waiting to hear what I had to say.

"I think I could've loved you, but I never got the chance to find out," I said.

Hiei nodded and I looked down at my feet. There were a lot of things I wasn't going to get to find out now. There were a lot things I was never going to find out now. A lot of things I'd never get to see play out.

"Will you miss me when I'm gone, Hiei?" I asked.

"Yes," he answered. It had come out so quickly, I assumed it wasn't true.

"You're always lying to make me feel better," I said.

"I already told you, I don't lie to make you feel better," he said.

"So you're telling the truth now?" I asked. "You'll miss me?" Hiei didn't answer, which is usually what he did when he didn't want to admit to something. I looked over at him. He was staring at me. "Hiei?"

". . . Sorry," he said.

"For what?" I asked.

But that was a dumb question because I knew how things with Hiei always went. He kissed me because that's just how we functioned for some reason. And for a moment I gave in because I'd missed him and I was supposed to be dying and for the longest time all I'd wanted was him. But I pushed him away and shook my head.

"This isn't fair, you know," I said. "Suddenly I'm dying and you want to be all honest. But it's not fair because you had a chance to be honest before and you missed it. And I've got Ichigo now. Dying or not, I chose him. This isn't fair to me and it's not fair to him."

"Detective-."

"No just. . . Stop," I said.

I walked away from him and started to head back outside to the others. I was angry and upset and confused which usually how interactions with Hiei left me feeling. On top of my probably imminent death, I was in a bad way. I had tunnel vision as I walked towards the outside and I walked right into someone.

"Whoa, slow down," I heard Ichigo said.

And suddenly I felt relieved. I wrapped my arms around him and buried my face in his chest.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm just. . ." I wanted to tell him the truth. I wanted to tell him what had just happened, but that would lead to more questions and answers that I wasn't ready to give him or anyone else. "It's nothing. I think I just need to punch something."

"All right," Ichigo said. "Let's see what we can do about that."

888

"So there's a crap ton of hybrids, what do we do about that?" Yusuke asked.

"Well they're not very strong so you really just need someone to make sure chop 'em up into pieces," Goten said.

"That'll take a lot of stamina," I said.

"I've got plenty of stamina, dear sister," Goten said.

"I never said you didn't," I said. "But I'm glad you're volunteering. Can I make a suggestion?"

"Of course," Kisuke said.

"I'm pretty sure someone mentioned to me early about being in charge of sword only combat. Pretty sure it was Captain Obvious and the Dumb Answers Squad," I said looking over to Kenpachi.

"You've still got a lot of sass," Ikkaku said.

"That's how she shows she cares. She's weird," Goten said.

I smiled at him.

"However sassy she is, she's right. No one's better suited to this job than Squad four," Kisuke said. "I'm going to assume Kairi going to want to go in."

"And I don't go in without my boys," I said.

"Ichigo, Orihime, Chad, Uryu, I assume you're in as well," Kisuke said.

They all gave a nod.

"The children are going to need babysitters," Genkai said. "Goku, Vegeta go with them. And you too, Bardock. Try and make yourself useful."

"I'll go with them too," Rukia volunteered.

"And me," Renji said as well.

"And the rest of you can help Squad 4 with the grunt work," Genkai said. "Let's try and make this quick. Not much time left before the universe collapses in on itself."