A/N: Sorry this is a little late. Yesterday was crazy and I didn't have a chance to get online. Anyway, it's time for the baby to come!

.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

It was the twelfth of October. My due date. I looked and felt massive. The baby had dropped and I could barely walk ten feet on my own anymore, the strain of having my baby's head lodged in my pelvis made any movement nearly impossible. My back hurt, my feet hurt, I was barely sleeping. As scared as I was of childbirth, I was beyond ready for the baby to come.

But she didn't.

Komui tried to comfort me by telling me that babies are rarely born on their due dates, but I didn't care. I just wanted her out of me.

Another week passed and I still hadn't gotten that wish. But what happened next almost made me wish that I hadn't made that wish in the first place.

It started with a backache. A twinge in my lower back that made moving and sitting up even harder than they already were. It tortured me all through lunch, so I escaped to my room the first chance I got. Maybe taking a nap would ease the pain.

It wasn't until I had collapsed on my side on the mattress that I realized that Kanda had followed me. But that made perfect sense; with how close I was to the end of my pregnancy, my husband barely let me out of his sight; between him and my friends, I had not been alone at all in the last three weeks; they even followed me into the bathroom. Yuu brushed my hair out of my face and kissed my forehead. "You alright, Moyashi?"

I shook my head as I awkwardly rubbed at my lower back; the concern in his eyes made it impossible to lie to him. "My back hurts. Carrying your baby has been murder on my muscles."

Kanda laughed and kissed my forehead again. Then he moved to where I couldn't see him. I felt his hands on my waistband, but before I could question him, he had pulled my pants down to my knees. "Bakanda! What are you-?"

I cut off with a moan as Kanda's strong fingers pushed up my shirt and began massaging the bare skin of my lower back. The more he worked, the more I moaned. It just felt so good.

I got lost in the wonderful feeling and let out a whine of protest when Kanda stopped to guide me onto my hands and knees. He laughed as he pulled my pants the rest of the way off when I got tangled in them, but otherwise he didn't make a sound.

My complaint about him stopping cut off when I once again felt him rubbing my back. He had climbed on the bed and knelt between my spread legs to get a better angle. But what I hadn't noticed yet was that his pants had joined mine on the floor.

The change of position made the back rub even better, and I didn't notice or care when his hands began to drift lower. We stayed like that for a while, his hands shifting between rubbing my back and caressing my ass. The tension in my muscles eased and I felt myself growing aroused.

Which is why I didn't protest the intrusion of his right index finger into my hole.

Kanda continued to rub my back with his left hand as he stretched me. It took longer than usual to prepare my hole, but that wasn't surprising; Kanda hadn't touched me like that in three months. Ever since my body had changed, we had had sex vaginally. So even though it hurt, the part of me that wanted to be male was ecstatic at the thought of being taken anally again.

I cried out in pain when Kanda thrust his length into me, ignoring the trickle of fluid from my vagina. I thought it was just the usual wetness that accompanied sex; it never even crossed my mind that it could be my water breaking.

My back was still on fire, my ass hurt, and the tightness and heaviness of my overdue belly was really weighing on me from the position I was in, but I ignored all of that discomfort in favor of focusing on sex with Kanda. I couldn't tell if I was crying out in pain or pleasure as I rocked my hips with his thrusts, and apparently, he couldn't either because he never faltered in his rhythm.

I came the first time he hit my prostate. The high of orgasm faded quickly though as a new pain seared through my body. There was something stretching my vagina from the inside.

I screamed as my belly suddenly contracted, giving in to what my body wanted me to do: push. The pressure in my vagina peaked as whatever was inside it stretched it wide and popped out. There was a sense of relief, even though I could tell that whatever it was wasn't even halfway out.

That was when my hormone riddled brain finally caught up with my senses. The thing sticking halfway out of me was my baby. I was giving birth. In the middle of sex.

Another contraction hit and I fought against the urge to push. As much as it hurt and as much as I wanted my baby out of me, I needed Kanda's help. I couldn't give birth while he was riding me.

It took a few tries, but I managed to regain control of my voice enough to tell Kanda to stop. Fortunately, after the incident a few months earlier, he had gotten a lot better at listening to me during sex. He pulled out of me just a few seconds later when he realized that I was in pain. The confused look on his face would have been precious if I weren't in such complete agony.

I screamed with the next contraction, bearing down with the urge to push. The baby moved, but only a little. I heard Kanda speak, but the pain roaring in my ears made it hard to hear. "Moyashi? Allen? What's wrong?"

"...The ... the baby's ... coming..."

"The baby's coming?" The way he just stood there stupidly made me want to hit him, but I couldn't move from my current position. However, he quickly snapped out of it and moved to pull his pants on. "We need to get you to the infirmary."

"There's no time. She's coming too fast." As if on cue, my words were followed by the strongest contraction yet.

I screamed and pushed with it, feeling my baby's shoulders stretch me open even wider than I already was. I leaned backwards, trying to spread my legs as much as I could in my awkward kneeling position. Kanda's hands were immediately on my hips, supporting me as I bore down. It hurt so badly, but then the pain was gone. The rest of the baby slid right out of me once her shoulders had come out.

I vaguely registered that Kanda had let go of me, and I could only hope that he was checking on our baby. I wanted to do it myself, but my body was so tense that I couldn't move.

I panted heavily as I tried to force my muscles to relax. My thoughts were scrambled, and only one thing surfaced: the time on the clock when I happened to glance at it. It had only been fifteen minutes since we had returned from lunch.

.x.x.

I had noticed that Allen looked uncomfortable when he left the cafeteria, but I didn't think much of it at the time. He was overdue, it was normal for him to be experiencing discomfort, so I wrote it off; I'd go check on him when I was done with my own lunch. Besides, if I had asked, he wouldn't have appreciated my concern. All my presence did lately was remind him that he was more female than male, and that irritated him. I kind of liked that the people in town thought we were sisters, but I understood where he was coming from.

Apparently, I actually should have been worried about him.

I knocked on the door to his suite and patiently waited for it to be answered. I could hear Allen and Kanda in the bedroom, and therefore knew they were there, so I just had to wait for one of them to get up. Only instead of getting a response from them, the next thing I heard was an agonizing scream.

Figuring out for myself that Allen was in labor and that the screeching was because of a contraction, I decided that privacy no longer mattered and let myself in; it wasn't much of a stretch to assume that they would need help getting to the infirmary. The scream faded by the time I reached the bedroom, but when I stepped inside, what I saw completely surprised me.

Allen was kneeling on the bed with his pants off, coated in sweat and looking like he was in a lot of pain. Kanda was standing behind him, picking something covered in gross red splotches up from between Allen's legs. The expression of shock on the samurai's face was probably identical to my own. Allen had just given birth.

I approached them quickly, hundreds of questions rattling through my head. It hadn't been that long since lunch, had I missed the signs? Had Allen been in labor the whole time and I just hadn't noticed? "What happened?"

"What the fuck do you think just happened, Lenalee?!" The sarcastic response was almost exactly what I expected to get in the situation, except that Allen was the one saying it. His anger made the words especially harsh, but given what I was looking at, he had every right to be swearing like that. "I just gave birth! You two need to snap out of whatever fucking fog you're stuck in, give me my baby, and get us down to the fucking infirmary as soon as fucking possible!"

I immediately sprang into action. Allen was right; my questions could wait. Besides, Kanda was looking like he was not mentally present and could faint at any moment. It was not an expression I would have ever expected to see on the samurai's face, but there wasn't time to dwell on that. Allen needed help, and I was clearly the only one of us who was able to give it.

Taking the squirming baby from Kanda, and trying not to gag at how gross the miracle of life was, I carefully maneuvered her between Allen's legs and placed her on the blankets below his chest; in his current position, he would have gotten tangled in the umbilical cord if I had tried to move him first. The white haired boy began crying the moment he laid eyes on his daughter. It was a relieving change; the angry glare he'd been giving me before that was quite unnerving.

While Allen babbled in baby talk at the little girl, who he was calling Erika, I helped him move, shifting his weight off his hands and freeing them so that he could finally hold the baby. He whimpered in pain the whole time, but between the two of us, we managed to get him into a seated position. When I placed the newborn in his arms, his tears turned to full on sobs.

I kissed Allen's forehead and told him that he was amazing, and that snapped Kanda back into the present. It wasn't exactly intentional, but it was certainly effective. I instructed Kanda to carry Allen to the infirmary while I ran ahead to warn the nurses they were coming.