Epilogue. Trigger warning- depression, suicidal thoughts, and self-harm. Enjoy.

"It's not gonna be that bad, love. I've had knee surgery in the past- it's all worked out okay. Recovery is shit, but you'll get through it."

"Fucking hell," I grumble. "Dez needs to go rot in fucking hell."

"Aus…" Riker glances at me with stern eyes. "Don't say shit like that."

"Why not? It's true. This is his fault."

"That doesn't mean you wish him to hell," Riker sighs. "Aus, no matter how much you hate him- no matter how much I hate him, I honestly wouldn't wish this pain on him. The pain of suicidal thoughts- depression. It hurts more than anything- I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. Feeling like you want to die is agonizing."

"But…he hurt me so much…" I sigh. Guilt mixed with pain bubbles in my stomach- I don't know what to feel. Guilty for the way I've been speaking about him, or agonized because he's truly caused me pain. Life has caused me pain- it's assumed that I'm over my parents' rush to give me up as soon as possible- but I'm not. It still hurts, like a hole in my heart.

Actually, my heart has a lot of holes. Empty places, which were once filled with all the people who've left me. I wouldn't be surprised if these guys left as well- creating four new holes in my shattered heart. I'm so loved with them- it can't be that good for me. I don't deserve something like this. Something has to go wrong.

And it will most likely be my suicide.

"Ally?"

I sigh, tapping my best friend's shoulder. She glances at me, her streaked hair flying in the wind. Her eyes are serious, and I can see hints of guilt in them. She's definitely feeling horridly guilty about what Riker said.

"Do you feel guilty?"

Ally sighs. "More than that, Trish. It's starting to make sense now- if it weren't for them, Austin would be dead. And honestly- I don't know if I want to be friends with him right now- I don't know how to help him, and I think I'd damage him more, considering the shit we've all been saying. Dez's actions are pretty much unforgivable, and the shit we said isn't something he can brush off like nothing. We basically called him lazy, useless, and worthless, a jealous dick, and much more. I don't know how he took those comments for so long. He's so strong, and we- we're honestly bitches, Trish."

My mind races. In all honesty- we have been horrible to Austin. And it was over a guy.

Ally's phone beeps, and she glances at it. "Dallas wants to meet me at the mall, I gotta go." The smile that graces her face afterward constitutes mixed emotions in me. Dallas is the reason we hurt Austin so much- yet he also makes Ally happy, so I am really happy for them. It's just confusing- I'm not sure what side I'm on, at this point.

Deep down, I know that she still holds animosity toward Austin- because Dallas doesn't seem to trust her. After Austin flipped at him, Dallas lost all trust he had in Ally, and I think it's starting to piss her off. Shouldn't be- considering Austin was just doing his duty as her best friend, but it is.

"Alright, so all they're gonna do is- make an incision, put wires and pins in to hold your bones together, and then close you back up. It's not going to be bad at all- and you'll be knocked out for the entire thing. They wouldn't dare keep you awake."

"I'm still against this." Austin glares at us, crossing his arms over his chest.

"You're being an idiot, love," Riker chuckles. "Stop the melodrama- all you're doing is freaking yourself out. It's not as bad as it sounds- Rocky made it seem a lot worse than it actually is- take it from someone who's had the surgery."

"Excuse you," I mutter, thumping his forehead. "I'm telling him the facts."

"Well, how about this fact? You are going to be fine, and we will be right here when you wake up- so you have nothing to worry about," Ratliff interjects, shaking his head at us. "I thought the entire point of this was to reassure Mr. Stubborn here that we didn't issue a death sentence on him."

"Rude!" Austin cries.

"Aye, stop being mean to him, all of you," Rydel scolds, leaning over to hug Austin gently. "We should be making it evident- how much we love him."

"I'm disowning all of you, except Rydel. She's the only one who's nice to me!" Austin teases.

"B-But I love you!" Riker feigns hurt, eliciting giggles from our youngest brother.

"No you don't," Austin mumbles. "If you loved me, you wouldn't be letting them cut me up like a goddamn Christmas ham!"

"Aus," I sigh. "You are going to be fine. We're doing this because we love you. In a couple hours, you'll be out of surgery, and your knee will go back to normal. You don't want to give up your life to the dickhead who did this to you. You're so much better than that, you moron. We want you to live up to your full potential- you deserve to."

Austin sighs. "M'sorry. Hospitals just…freak me out, is all…"

"It's alright, love," I say, my voice gentle and calm. I reach forward and pull him into my arms, careful with his IV. The surgery's in a half hour- so we're already at the hospital- they put him into a room, and put an IV into his arm, so they can inject anesthesia when it's time.

"Where's it gonna go from here…?" Austin asks. "I'm still so fucking damaged, and Riker- just because you're three years older than I am, and good at hiding your emotions- doesn't mean I can't see you falling apart. You're neglecting your mental health for me- and as much as I appreciate how much you love me, you can't do that. We can't lose you, Rik… do you know how much it would destroy us all? You've done so much for this family- and it includes forcing yourself not to fall apart, when in all honesty- you need to break. There's only so much a heart can take- and when it reaches its breaking point- the point of no return is synonymous to the feeling. If you hit rock bottom, and attempt to kill yourself, nothing will ever be the same. This is why you need to talk to us. It's okay to need help- it's okay to admit that you aren't okay. You need to, Riker- before you do something you'll regret."

"Alright, Aus. We'll be here when you wake up, okay? Promise."

I kiss Austin's head gently, squeezing his hands. "I love you."

"Love you too, Ratliff," he murmurs, leaning forward to place his head on my chest. "Any chance we could ditch this hellhole without anyone knowing?"

I give him a small smile, shaking my head. "Sorry bud, you gotta get this done. Think of it this way- in an hour and a half, we'll be right back here- only the surgery will be done, and all you can focus on is recovery."

"Y'know…" Austin grins. "That works. Thanks, Ratliff."

"No problem, lil' bro. I think I better give the others a turn- I'm already getting the death glares- especially from Riker."

"There's enough of me to go around, hug me a little bit longer," Austin protests childishly, bringing his arms up to wrap around me.

"You're hogging him, Ratliff! Rude!"

I grin, shaking off the comments, and squeeze Austin tighter, planting a sloppy kiss on his cheek. "He's mine."

"Bullshit," Riker replies. "He's mine." He shoulders me aside, to wrap his own arms around Austin- only to be shoved away by Rydel.

"Guys! There's one of me, and four of you! Take turns! Jesus Christ!" Austin giggles, pulling away from Rydel. He holds his arms open for Rocky, and our oldest brother smiles, embracing Austin. "See? Rocky waits his turn, unlike all you dumbasses."

"Austin? It's time to go."

Doctor Parker strolls into the room, two nurses behind him. He glances at Austin, taking note of his vitals, and then nods to his assistants.

Austin sighs. "Okay…"

"We'll be right here, love," Rocky reassures him. "You'll be fine- promise."

"I love you guys," Austin whispers.

"We love you too, Aus," Riker says gently.

"Waiting is fucking horrible."

"Last time we were here, it was waiting for news on Riker's condition," Ratliff mutters bitterly.

"Thanks a lot," Riker mumbles, dropping his head. "Wait to make me feel better about myself."

"Ratliff!" Rydel scolds, wrapping her arms around her twin. She mutters something in his ear, and he shakes his head- pulling away from her embrace.

"M'going for a walk. Text me if you guys hear something."

Riker walks toward the hospital exit, keeping his head down, and his eyes averted. I think I understand what Austin was talking about- there's definitely something wrong with him, and he feels the need to hide it.

"Someone needs to go after him," Rydel says, glaring at Ratliff.

"I'll go," I offer, rising to my feet.

"No, Rocky," Ratliff replies. "It's my fault- I shouldn't have said that- I'll go. Be back soon. Text me if you know something- I'll make sure he's okay."

"Riker?"

I shove my hands into my pockets, continuing to walk forward. "Go away, Ratliff. I'm fine- you didn't need to come and check up on me."

"Bullshit," Ratliff mutters, grabbing my arm. In a moment, I'm facing him, and I sigh, shaking his hand off my arm.

"What do you fucking want from me?!" I glance up at the sky so I don't have to look at him- because if I do, he'll break me. I don't want him to know about this- he has enough on his plate.

"I want you to stop holding it in," Ratliff says. "You are not fucking Superman, Riker. And even if you consider yourself to be- every superman has his kryptonite. You're not fucking invincible, so stop acting like you are!"

"I can try to be invincible. Not that fucking difficult."

"Riker, you're talking to the person who relapsed recently. I hate asking for help, and I've got Rocky on my back, asking if I'm okay every five goddamn seconds. It gets annoying after a while, but I know he means well. Don't fucking hold this in- you heard what Austin said."

"I did," I grumble. "And he knows me too goddamn well. I'm fucking fine. We need to worry about him. Not to mention the fact that you need help as well. I'm fine- I'm in no immediate danger to myself."

"Says who?" Ratliff shoots back. "You're trying to delude yourself into thinking you're okay, but you are fucking not. Just because you haven't cut in two months, it doesn't mean you won't start now. I was originally clean for six months, but now it's only been one week. Relapsing is so fucking easy, you have no idea."

"I have no idea?! I hold a fucking blade to my wrist at least three or four times a day! It's a miracle that my hand doesn't slip, or my mindset doesn't become 'fuck it', and I just start cutting. I know exactly how easy it is, Ratliff. And I don't think I'll be pulled in that easily. I've managed to resist it for so long, I think I'm fucking strong enough to resist it for a few more weeks."

"Do what you fucking want," Ratliff says coldly. "But don't make me, or our broken siblings find your fucking body on the bathroom floor, lying in a pool of your own blood."

"It's already been almost a hour and a half. Why isn't there any information? God fucking dammit, I wanna fucking shake it out of them."

"Ratliff," I mutter. "You need to calm the fuck down. This only means the surgery is almost over. We should have news on Austin soon."

"Soon is too long," Ratliff sighs, slumping back in his seat. "It's been too damn long."

"Be optimistic," Rocky says gently. "He'll be fine. He's strong."

I exhale a deep breath. "And Ratliff, did you get anything outta Riker?"

"It's starting to seem hopeless, Ry…" he mumbles. "He's built so many walls- so much fortitude is guarding his emotions. It's so hard to break- but I did get one thing out of him. He admitted it out of anger, but he admitted it all the same."

"What is it?" I'm concerned for my brother- he's my twin, and we usually tell each other everything, but I know something's wrong, and he refuses to divulge anything, so the fact that Ratliff has something is very good news.

"He said that at least three or four times a day- he holds a razor to his wrist, and considers it a miracle that he hasn't succumbed to the temptation. It's getting dangerous- he's going to those heights. Holding the blade to his wrist makes the prospect of relapse so much easier."

"Austin is stable. The surgery was successful with no complications- we inserted a wire and two screws- along with reconstructing his MCL. He'll be in a cast/brace for four to six weeks, before starting physical therapy."

My eyes widen, as we all rise to our feet. "Can we see him?"

Doctor Parker nods. "You may. We're going to discharge him tomorrow- just making sure nothing went wrong during the surgery, so we want to keep him overnight. His legal guardian is you, Rocky- I understand?"

I nod. "Yeah."

"You can stay with him tonight. I'm not sure about the others- I do know they are his siblings, so I'll do my best to get permission for them as well. He's in room 604- I believe he's awake, but he'll be a bit groggy and out of it for a while."

I reach out to shake his hand, smiling at him. "Thank you. For everything you've done for us."

"You're quite welcome, Rocky. Now, go see your brother. He's been asking for you guys."

"Hey there, you idiot."

I glance up sleepily, as all my siblings file into the room. "Hey guys."

"I need an Austin-hug!" Ratliff shouts, crossing the room in a single stride, and throws himself at me. I laugh, hugging him back.

"I love you too, Ratliff," I murmur, leaning my head on his shoulder. I'm really exhausted- that surgery wore me out. The only pain I have in my knee is a dull ache, so that's good.

"Hey asshole, give us a turn!" Rydel pushes her brother away and hugs me next. I breathe in the scent of her perfume, sighing in content. Leaning up, I kiss her cheek gently, eliciting a smile from my sister.

"Riker?"

I glance at him with worry in my eyes. He's standing apart from the rest of them, obvious pain in his eyes- tense posture giving it all away. He looks like he's about to snap, and I know something happened while I was out. "Come here, Rik."

Riker sighs. He walks toward me, and once he's within arms-length, I pull him down, into an embrace. "Rik…" He's rigid in my arms, and I lean up to kiss his hair gently, sighing heavily. He may be my older brother, but that doesn't mean he doesn't need me. He looks like he's about to break down in tears- the walls he's built around himself are crumbling slowly.

"You're gonna be okay, Riker. I love you."

"Homebound!"

"Well, Ratliff, for that to actually make sense, you should've said it when we were leaving the hospital, not when we're entering our house."

"Must you do that every time I say something?"

I have to laugh at my brothers' bickering- they never seem to actually get along with each other. It's always Ratliff- with his smartass humor, and Rocky, with his incessant need to correct his brother on everything.

"Guys?" I ask. "Can I say something? Something important?"

"Of course, go ahead, Austin. We're listening." Rocky replies. He collapses onto the couch, next to Riker, and Ratliff drops into Rydel's lap, leaning his head against her shoulder.

"It's been a little over two weeks since I've met you guys- and let's just put it this way- you changed my life. I was going to commit suicide- I was done with everything. I couldn't take the incessant insults from Ally, Trish and Dez, the disappointing remarks from my parents, and the shit I got at school. It was a lot, and the weight of the burden on my shoulders was purely exhausting. I couldn't take it anymore- all I wanted to do was slice into my wrists for once and for all. But then- Riker saved me. He brought me to you guys, and even though it has only been two weeks- these weeks have been some of the best in my life. Sure, I've still been horridly suicidal, and my depression haunts me with every step I take- but the love I've felt in these two weeks is unbelievable. What you've done for me- you took it upon yourselves to take custody of me and get me out of my parents' house- it's hard to believe that I have such amazing people in my life. You guys loved me when I didn't love myself. You believed in me when I had already subjected my soul to hell. It's because of you all- that I am still here. I love every single one of you with all my heart- you will always be my life- and my reason to be. Thank you for everything- I love you all so much- and I will cherish each one of you until the day I die."

So, like Austin- my first words will be thank you. The amount of support this story has received is unbelievable, and I'm so grateful that you all have liked something I came up with in a single afternoon. I never imagined it to turn out like this, but I have come to love this story like it is my own child. I'm proud of it- and I'm so thankful for all the reviews, favorites, and follows. You all are truly amazing. That being said- the sequel should be up today, or tomorrow- I haven't decided yet. Thank you all again- and I'm looking forward to seeing you on Recovery.

(yes that's the title it's lame I know but there you go)

-Neha