A/T: Disclaimer: Don't own Hetalia, but story and OCs are mine.

Chapter 28

Natalya walked into the dojo, and was assaulted by a wave of heat. She stopped, and blinked for a few seconds, before braving the heat and moving to one corner.

Alfred and Ivan were sparring again, both of them in their demonic forms, and by the looks of it, neither of them were holding back. By the tattoos arranged on Ivan's bare arms, Nat guessed he was at level 16, which was probably the lowest level he could get to while ensuring everyone else's safety, and Alfred was giving it his all. Both of them were sweating profusely, and if they had realised Nat was in the room, they didn't show it.

Nat watched them spar. Their torsos were bare - most probably because they had burnt holes into some of their shirts, which were already few in number. Both of their trousers were supplied by Ivan, who had had it spun from a peculiar thread which would let energy flow through it, thereby creating no resistance or heat. Alfred was surrounded by his golden-orange energy, which was a contrast to Ivan's violet flames, and every time they clashed, the ground shook slightly.

Nat still couldn't believe the gumption with which Alfred had spoken to both the Wangs; at the same time, she could see the tattoo on his back, and how it was coming together. He had told her that Tony was growing in his head, and he could take over at any given point, at least for a few minutes. His face had been set in stone, but his eyes were full of worry. She realised what he meant when he said he was desperate then.

She looked at Ivan. She had nothing to say to him. She didn't believe what happened between them was any of her business, but if it was interfering with her - no, their - goals, then she had a problem with it.

They were moving fast, but Nat could still differentiate their movements. Alfred kicked, Ivan parried with a punch of his own. Alfred ducked, came back with an uppercut. Ivan nimbly stepped back, let the demonic energy enveloping his arm flare, and brought it down hard. Alfred jumped back, and ran towards Ivan with a roar, his own energy blazing.

Nat turned towards the sound at the door, and watched Shree enter. Shree's face didn't betray any emotion as she walked to where Nat was, but Nat knew she was closely observing the sparring session before her. Shree sat down next to Nat, not saying a word, her eyes focused on the semi-demons' movements. Nat glanced at Shree's face, and turned back to look at Alfred and Ivan.

"How far have you come with the staff?" Nat asked. Shree hadn't slept since the day Alfred had issued his challenge, working day and night to make a staff strong enough to withstand Alfred's strength without disintegrating. Every material she placed in Alfred's hands broke, shattered, bent or melted because of his demonic energy, and she couldn't reinforce it with the normal incantation marks in the fear of hurting Alfred in his demonic state.

Shree sighed. "The initial design is done. Me and Matt finished that up yesterday. I'm running materials through Matthew before getting it to Alfred, but nothing seems to be working. Nothing seems to be strong enough to take his energy without breaking."

"Is that why Ivan doesn't use weapons? I wonder," Nat mused out loud.

Shree gave a hollow laugh. "He doesn't need weapons with his strength. Besides, he always has that pipe of his" -

"Which he never uses," Nat supplied absently, her mind running over the predicament they were in.

Shree was the best person to design a weapon - and with Matt's help, they could design a spectacular weapon. But they needed it ready, not just for the match, but also for Alfred to practice with - giving him a weapon as he stepped into the arena was worse than not giving him a weapon at all.

"You need something that will resist Chun Yan's incantations," Nat said. "She's going to use that to her advantage."

Shree nodded. "Alfred's weakness against spiritual energy is her strength. We found a way to work against it. What we don't have is a way to get something strong enough within today."

Nat's eyes were on Alfred's movement, as if searching for answers there. "You want something strong enough to take his energy…" she muttered, mostly to herself. Suddenly, an idea struck her. "Shree!"

"Yeah?"

"Instead of using a material strong enough to resist Alfred's energy, why don't you use something that will conduct Alfred's energy? No resistance means no breaking."

Shree shook her head resignedly. "We thought about that, too. We have the metal, but to conduct energy, it needs incantations to be engraved. And we don't have anything which can channel his energy," Shree said. "Matt and I went through the entire library they have here. Nothing useful."

Nat chewed on her lower lip, her eyes looking at the dark circles under her friend's eyes, and then back at the match.

Alfred and Ivan were slowing down, their energy levels lowering. They settled for close range combat, deciding away with bouncing around the dojo, moving in tight circles around an imaginary focus between them. And that's when Alfred's bare back came into view.

"Alfred, stop!" Nat cried out, getting on her feet.

Alfred stopped, but, unfortunately for him, no one told Ivan to stop. The second his body froze involuntarily at Nat's command, Ivan's kick connected with his midriff, throwing him into the air.

Shree winced as he landed ungracefully before them, but Nat couldn't care less. Even as Alfred began to protest, Nat grabbed his forearm and pulled him into a sitting position, not even noticing his energy enveloping her hand gently.

"You can use these!" she said excitedly, pointing at the inscriptions on his back. "They aren't complete, but they are allowing him to channel his energy right now. Maybe they'll help channelling his energy through other objects."

Shree blinked at Nat, the blank amazement in her eyes quickly being overtaken by the idea Nat had put forth. She squatted behind Alfred, but the minute she touched his skin, the energy singed her.

"Alfred, power down," Shree said, wincing, her stinging finger in her mouth.

Alfred obliged, but frowned at Nat. "What's going on?"

Ivan powered down as well, the tattoos in his arm moving until his energy was dissipated. "I guess that's the end of our session for today."

"I had an idea," Nat told Alfred blandly.

"Well, I got kicked for it," Alfred grumbled.

"Don't whine," Nat retorted, but Alfred continued to mutter. "Shree, that tickles!"

Shree's finger stopped moving over the inscriptions on Alfred's back. "Sorry, Al," she said. "But Nat may be onto something. This could work." Shree suddenly rose to her feet. "Come on, Alfred! We have work to do!" she enthused, grabbing hold of Alfred and yanking him to his feet when he wasn't quick enough.

"Hey! Will " -

"Thanks, Nat! See ya, guys!" Shree said as she walked out of the dojo, dragging a protesting Alfred along with his.

"But will someone tell me what the hell's going on!"

Ivan watched Shree dragging Alfred away, and turned to Nat. "What happened?"

"Shree was having problems making the staff conduct Alfred's energy without inscriptions, so I thought she could use the ones on Alfred's back, and see what happened."

Ivan looked at Nat thoughtfully. "That's quite the thought."

Nat shrugged. "If it works, you could try it, too."

Ivan chuckled. "I won't be vain enough to say I don't need weapons, but I've done fairly well without them. Still, it will be nice to use something" -

"That isn't a pipe," Nat completed, an unimpressed expression on her face.

"That pipe is handy," Ivan said, walking around her to where he had kept his things. He picked up his shirt, and began pulling it on.

"Do you think Alfred can win?"

A slight pause in Ivan's movements gave an indication to the effect the question had on him. "I think he has a good chance," he said, his voice as light as ever, betraying none of the emotion he actually felt.

"Do you think you can win?"

This time, he couldn't school his expressions as well as he had before. "What?"

"Can you win?"

"Against Chun Yan?"

Nat tilted her head slightly.

"But I'm not the one" - fighting her, his voice trailed off. The silence between them was uncomfortable, and Ivan finally broke it with a sigh. "Natalya…"

"If Alfred has a chance at winning, it's better we leave before we waste any more time here," Nat said bluntly. Heat rushed to her throat, but Nat kept her voice even. "We need Chun Yan to study the marks on his back, and we don't have enough time for the two of them to sit here and do it. If she agrees to study the marks, it means she'll have to come along with us." When Ivan didn't respond, she continued, "We need her, Ivan, just as much as we need you or Shree or anyone else…on this team."

The thought of being a part of a team with Chun Yan in it made Ivan wince.

"If you plan on continuing to fight with her for the rest of your life…it's honestly none of my business. But this team needs you, and her. So…figure something out," Nat said, and when Ivan didn't respond, she walked out of the dojo.

Ivan stood there, rooted to the floor, Nat's words running in his head. Only when he let out a sigh did he realised he'd been holding his breath, and a feeling he hadn't experienced in a long time.

Weariness right down to his bones.

Ivan sat down on the bench, looking aimlessly at the high roof of the building, his eyes searching for answers in the cracks in the ceiling. He closed his eyes, and his head tilted back, leaning against the wall behind him. He sighed again.

Natalya was right. Alfred needed her. Everything they had worked for together till now needed Chun Yan to join them, so that they could keep moving forward.

And maybe…just maybe…he needed her, too.

The only woman he'd ever loved. And the only woman capable of destroying him.

He needed her to listen to him, even before he could think of her forgiveness. Love didn't come easily to either of them, and neither did forgiveness.

He needed her to listen to him.

He needed to stop their cold war.

He felt bile rise to his throat. The fear was unmistakable. But he had a sense of purpose now, an even bigger reason to stop ignoring all the right reasons.

He was scared. Shit scared. But he wasn't a coward. Not any more.

This needed to stop.

Chun Yan swung her staff around her, over her head, in front of her, the staff constantly spinning. She moved along with it, turning, twisting, stepping forward and then back. She'd spent a few hours training with some of the other priests in the dojo - the one which Natalya's friends weren't using - and, at that point, she wanted to be alone.

That boy, Alfred…He was young, and he was clueless about the world around him, and, to an extent, the people around him. But Chun Yan, in all of her experience, had seen few people as determined as him.

And fewer people dumb enough to challenge her to a fight.

Thinking about the people who'd come in the previous day, Chun Yan smiled. They were a rag tag group - the best from the spiritual world and the best from the civilian world, in terms of power. All of them together seemed so uncoordinated, but they were highly aware of each other.

Chun Yan had no idea what it felt like to travel in a group - all of her travels had strictly been on her own, or with guides. Never with…friends.

And honestly, she didn't mind - she'd come to love her own company, to the exclusion of all others. She had her eccentricities, and she didn't accommodate others if they didn't understand them.

Chun Yan stopped, flushed and sweating from her exertions. She lowered her staff, put it on the ground next to her, and began to move through the motions to warm down. She had other duties to perform, and while a part of her couldn't help be excited to face the unknown, another part of her was very clear on certain things, one such being Alfred's experience.

They might have done a lot of fighting on their travels, but Chun Yan had her fare share of experiences. And Alfred's experience could never match her own.

Her eyes moved to the leather bag she always carried around, one which housed her whip. The engraved handle peeked out of the mouth of the bag, gleaming in the filtered sunlight. Her fingers itched for the feel of the handle in her palm, the power of the whip at her disposal. It was a shame that Nat chose the weapon before she could - but maybe it was for the best. At least, this way, their match would hold some semblance to a fight.

Half way through her stretching, she felt his presence.

Ignoring it, she continued to stretch. But he didn't seem to move from where he was.

He knew she'd know he was there. And she was ignoring him. But still, he didn't seem to understand.

"Leave," she said out loud, and if anyone else had been there, they wouldn't have seen anyone.

"We need to talk."

"No, we don't. I have nothing to say to you, aru."

"I need to talk."

"I don't want to hear what you have to say, aru. Leave."

"Chu"-

"Don't call me by my name. Don't even" -

"Okay, Wang. I need to speak to you. Hear me out. Please."

Chun Yan didn't reply. She continued through her motions, this time, with her eyes closed. He didn't say anything, but she could still feel his presence. Suddenly, it vanished.

Chun Yan shrugged mentally. Oh well. That was quick. Good enough. And she continued to cool down.

Once through all of her exercises, she opened her eyes, free from his presence. She joined her hands, fist in palm, and bowed to the four directions. She then opened her eyes, leaned down and picked up her staff. She turned around, and jumped visibly when she saw Ivan standing there.

She stared at him. His face was…naked. He'd put all his emotions on display, without any masks or barriers. He looked back at her, hands fisted, clutching at his pants - she recognised the gesture as him trying not to cross his arms, trying to be open. He was frowning at her, his eyes full of regret, his face morose.

Pathetic. Utterly pathetic.

Chun Yan broke eye contact, picked up her leather bag, and slung it onto her shoulder. Without giving him another glance, she walked away.

What she expected him to do was stand there and watch her walk away, like he always had.

What she didn't expect him to do was to follow her.

She gritted her teeth, growing visibly annoyed by the second, but trying to keep a straight face as she walked into the main building. People who smiled to greet her visibly paled at the sight of Ivan walking behind her, and the more of such reactions she got, the more she wanted to pull out her whip and lash at him. Her grip around the staff tightened, but she managed to keep her features even and composed.

She went to the dojo, and deposited her staff there. He waited for her a little away from the door, and when she walked away from the dojo, without looking at him, he followed.

She wasn't going to run, she wasn't going to run, she -

She turned a corner, and broke into a run.

People in the corridor watched in amazement as Chun Yan ran past them, followed a few seconds later by Ivan. Chun Yan zipped through the corridors, flew down the banisters of the staircases, made sudden turns, but Ivan was always a few paces behind, never losing sight of her. Suddenly, she stopped.

She was breathing heavily from the exertion. Behind her, she could hear Ivan breathing heavily as well, but he was trying to mask it. She turned around, and looked at him, trying to catch her breath.

They were in the lower parts of the monastery, which was devoid of other people at the time. The two of them caught their breath, and Ivan didn't break eye contact with Chun Yan the entire time.

"W-What are you doing, aru?" Chun Yan asked, her breathing almost even. "Why are you doing this?"

"I need you to listen to what I have to say," he said simply.

"So you follow me around, aru? What happened to your pride?" she asked, her voice rising.

"I don't have any left, Chun Yan."

She looked at him, startled, but still cynical. He looked like he was telling her the truth, but Chun Yan was far from convinced. "I told you not to call me that."

"I can't call you Wang. There are at least ten other Wangs here."

She frowned at him. He was right about that, but the way he said her name…It brought back memories. Memories which she had tried so hard to bury deep within her psyche.

She looked at him. "How do you expect me to listen to you after" -

"I don't. I don't expect you to. But I need to tell you this, and if I have to follow you for the next two days, I will. And I'll follow you for as long as you want me t"-

He stopped. Both of them had the same thought - in another time, almost a lifetime ago, he'd told her the exact same thing, but as a promise.

I'll follow you for as long as you want me to, no matter how far in life you go.

I don't want you to follow me, aru. Just be by my side.

I'm not good enough for you, Chun Yan. Until then, I'll follow you.

"Okay then, aru. Tell me. Whatever it is that you want to tell me," Chun Yan said. She didn't want to prolong this any longer than it had to be.

Ivan took a deep breath. "We need to stop this…cold war we have going on between us."

Chun Yan scoffed, but Ivan wasn't done. "I beg for your forgiveness, and for Wang Yu Min's forgiveness, and for the forgiveness of the entire House of Grass. I am willing to stand up to trial, and I am willing to face punishment for all of my mistakes. A public trial, if you wish, or a private trial, where you decide how to punish me."

Chun Yan's mouth slackened, and fell open. But Ivan wasn't done. As she watched, Ivan got down on both knees, his head down, his hands on his thighs. And he did the unthinkable, something no man of his stature ever did to anyone except God Herself.

Reaching forward, he prostrated before her.

"Aiyaa," Chun Yan gasped, and fell to her knees, grabbing hold of his shoulders and pulling him up. "Ivan! What are you thinking!" she yelled at him. "What the hell is wrong with you!"

"I want to make things right, Chun Yan," he whispered, his eyes open to the broken pieces that made his insides. "I want to stop this" -

"This is not how you make things right, goddamit!" Chun Yan yelled, shaking him. "As the Head of a House, you aren't" -

"But I'm not the Head of a House in front of you."

"As my senior" -

"I'm the man who tried to ruin your life, Chun Yan. I'm trying to apologise for it. And if I have to kneel, to prostrate, to grovel, I will."

Chun Yan stared at him in shock. The Ivan she knew would never bow to anyone, to the point where it was surprising that he even believed in God. The Ivan she knew would never lower his pride. The Ivan she knew would never, ever prostrate, not even to his own teacher.

The Ivan she knew was harsh, deadly, dangerous and, most importantly, as much a demon as the one he housed within himself.

But he was also the man she once loved.

Her hands fell away from his shoulder. Even as she digested what had happened, she couldn't just forget the fact that he had, like he rightly said, tried to ruin her life, and make everyone around her miserable. She couldn't forget it.

But the man in front of her seemed to bear no resemblance to the man who had done all those things.

"We need to stop this, Chun Yan. You don't have to forgive me - not now, or in the future. I don't ask for your forgiveness. All I ask of you is to give me a way to set things right. Don't ask me to walk away, or leave you alone. That hasn't changed anything, or helped anyone. It's only made things worse. This cannot go on."

Chun Yan couldn't bear to look at him. Another time, another place, these words were all she wanted to hear from him. She prayed, she begged to her God to make him realise this, understand all of this. But it never happened then.

He was three years too late.

"You're too late, aru. You're just too late," Chun Yan whispered, rising. Why the hell was her throat clogged up?

Ivan looked up at her, still kneeling. "It's better late than never, Chun Yan."

Chun Yan looked at him, a mixture of pain and intense sorrow that was washing up against her soul in waves. "Get up, aru."

Ivan got up, and for a second, Chun Yan appreciated how much taller he was than her. "I'm sorry for hurting you, Chun Yan. I've been sorry all these years. I never had the courage to face you. I was a coward, I still am. You knew that, but you still loved me, somehow."

"What changed, aru? The fact that you had to come here?" Chun Yan asked, unable to keep the bitterness from her voice.

"Maybe. But more than that…it's these people, Chun Yan. They are all so strange - they're oblivious to our ways and customs, and they sometimes cause more trouble than good, but…I see them caring for each other, and even me. And I've come to care about them, too. All of them. Even Gilbert."

Chun Yan couldn't help but smile. "The albino?"

Ivan nodded, returning the smile. "Yes." His smile faded. "I might be here because Alfred needs your help, but I've come to realise that this should have happened a very long time ago. And it's only when you have to care for others do you realise that you no longer can be a coward.

"I don't ask for your forgiveness yet, Chun Yan, because I don't deserve to ask you for it yet. But I am ready to accept whatever punishment you give me. And hopefully, one day, I can ask for your forgiveness."

Chun Yan's hand rose involuntarily, but before her palm could rest on his cheek, she stiffened, and arrested the movement. Curling her fingers, she dropped her fist to her side, embarrassed at her unconscious, almost reflexive attempt to comfort him. His gaze dropped to her hand, and looked up at her.

If Ivan could cry, he would have. The pain in his eyes, the look on his face, was nothing less than heartbroken. Even Chun Yan's cynical side couldn't dispute it.

"I have to go," Chun Yan whispered, rushing past him, her throat constricting, her heart hammering, her chest filled up with an unbearable pain which was making breathing difficult. Her eyes burned, but the tears wouldn't come - no, they couldn't. She'd already cried way too much, a long time ago.

She didn't get too far, though - she took a diversion from the route they'd previously used, and sat down in an alcove, where no one could see her. She leaned against the wall, and stretched her feet, her head tilted back, trying to breathe.

She heard Ivan's footsteps. They weren't the footsteps of the man she'd known - the confident, almost arrogant gait, the measured pace, the large strides. These footsteps were a shuffle, one foot dragging across the floor, followed by the next. She could imagine him walking, his shoulders hunched, an air of utter dejection around him, his face…

She closed her eyes. The grip of pain grew tighter around her lungs, squeezing the air out. His face wouldn't stop flashing before her eyes. The hope when her hand reached up, the pain in them when she dropped her hand...

In all of her imaginations, in every scene she'd made up in her head about the day he would apologise, she had never imagined him to be like this. It had always been a 'take-it-or-leave-it' apology or a heartfelt, sincere apology. Never a request from a broken man to break him further.

He spoke about punishment. He couldn't begin to imagine what a punishment it had been to be away from him, and what a punishment it was now to be around him. And if she could get herself to believe what he'd said, the past three years seemed to have been a punishment for him, too.

He'd knelt before her, prostrated before her. He couldn't weep - he was too hardened to be able to cry, and she could never accept his tears - but he looked like he would have.

The footsteps faded away. He'd left. She was alone.

The more she thought about it, the more she couldn't deny to herself that he was being honest - no games, no acting, no pretence. Even her hardened heart had to agree.

He was nothing like the man she remembered. In fact, she didn't know who this man was.

Her eyes burned. Pressing her fists to her eyes, she gritted her teeth.

Goddamn you, Ivan. Goddamn you.

A/T: Emotional chapter, I know. But we're making some headway in the Ivan - Chun Yan side.

Tell me what you think, people! Reviews make me happy!

All my love,

R. K. Iris.