Chapter 40

Mama,
I know these words mean little but I've never intended to hurt you. Do not worry about me- I will be safe and completely happy. I will not say goodbye- I will see you again one day. Give all my love to Frances, Minette, Dom and Merle.
-Billie

A tear filled with tragedy, anger and bewilderment fell and stained the folded piece of paper. It was incomprehensible. Billie had left? It sounded like a nightmare, one Minette had made up to explain her sisters absence in the room. When Mary entered, appalled and horrified to see her empty bed containing only a letter, for some time her mind was too much in a blur to react.

It was an unfathomable action for Billie- that was, the old Billie. For the girl who recently liked to keep secrets and sneak out it was almost fitting. That, however, did not at all soften the blow. Mary's child, regardless of reputation or behavior, was missing and that wasn't right. That didn't happen. Where was she and how far had she gotten? Did someone take her? She had enough time to write a letter, like the girl had been planning it for some time, but that didn't make sense. Surely she wouldn't leave by her own accord. Someone was involved, a boy, of that she was certain. Had she been brainwashed?

There were questions, sensible to ridiculous, that engulfed her being.

In a remarkable effort to comprehend Mary assessed what she did know and what she didn't. She related these facts to previous encounters in similar situations. When Billie had disappeared before where did she go and where could she be? The woman stumbled downstairs and went to the telephone. Her finger jabbed at the device, her hands shaking. While she waited another one of her daughters, Frances, appeared in the hallway from the backdoor. Her face was flushed, she having been ordered with the rest of her siblings to search the entire premises for Billie. The girl looked at her levelly, shaking her head.

Another wave of trepidation flowed through her, she finally hearing a voice on the line. "Audrey! Billie's gone, is she there?" Her question was met with confusion. "Tell me if she's there! She's not anywhere outside, in the house, she left a note!"

It took Audrey a good few moments to calm Mary down, which was a tough feat due to the fact that now her own heart rate was pulsing. In short, she too was horrified. What had they done? What had her brother done? In some ways the woman felt herself to be an accomplice and an enabler and the hurt this cased went right to the bone. She knew, and was likely the only one that knew, what was going on between Billie and John. If she had mentioned something, if she had taken more action would this have all been avoided?

Unlike Mary, Audrey knew for a fact Billie was with her brother, and ultimately she was safe. There was only a certain kind of safe you could be when one was around a wanted criminal, but she was positive John would do everything possible to keep Billie out of harms way. He would even endanger himself, a thought that brought on another sickly feeling.

Audrey asked Mary what the note said and listened to a hysterical rant about how she knew a boy was involved. Did she know if Billie had been seeing anyone? Did she know who she had been hanging around with at school? Audrey knew all the answers to these questions but could never speak them. Instead she agreed with the other woman but in a way that didn't rowel her up; more than anything she wanted Mary to be calm and not act impulsively.

"...and if she is with a boy you know you really can't do anything about it," she said. "If you pull her away from him she's just going to run back, over and over. It'll be out of your control." Mary replied that she had considered involving the authorities and Audrey practically yelped into the receiver. "No! You don't want to do that...they won't be able to do anything either, they'll file her as a runaway and never look at it again...she's old enough..."

When Mary spoke next it was cryptically, her words laced with the other woman's hypocrisy. "Is that what you would do?"

She was asking her what she would do given she were in the same situation. Audrey paused. If one of her daughters was missing there would be nothing that could hold her back; she would find them, and if a boy had been the cause she would hunt him down. How could she tell Mary to do anything different? In the midst of this Audrey turned to find Mary, her own daughter, standing a short distance away, her eyes bright and alarmed. Her expression was plain. The girl had overheard enough of the conversation to know that her best friend was missing.