(Shelby's Point of view)

I found my old wicked Broadway soundtrack and popped it in when Beth's eyes met mine in the rearview mirror.

"Mommy, what's wrong?" Beth asked.

"Nothing sweetheart."

"You listen to this song a lot." She said. I froze. Did I listen to it a lot?

I paused gripping the steering wheel a little harder than before.

"You know sweetheart...sometimes when you can't think of words to say, you sing what you feel."

"Like Daddy?"

"Yes, like Daddy." I said as I smiled.

My thoughts drifted back to Rachel.

5 years ago, I lied to protect her from learning the truth about Beth. I didn't know how it would make her feel that I could help Beth and be there for her in ways that Rachel wanted. It's almost like it was yesterday.

FLASHBACK

5 years ago

"Are you babysitting?" She asked confused. My eyes closed. This was the moment I hoped to avoid.

"No." I said. I paused, watching her carefully.

"Oh. Okay, so why do you have diapers in your hand?" She asked, her voice unusually quiet.

My eyes dropped to the ground. My ears went hot. I'm not sure when the room started spinning, but it did. Rachel must have noticed my discomfort.

"Shelby?" She asked with a worried tone.

"It's for my God daughter." I said referring to Beth and that's when it occurred to me that that's who I will be to Beth.

Pleased with my answer, she changed the subject.

'Shelby, since we're here this might be a little odd but I was hoping that we could start over? I have a song that I want to sing for Glee and I'd really love it if you sang it with me." She rambled.

I smiled a warm smile, my hand finding her shoulder.

"I'd like that a lot." I beamed.

Excited, she embraced me.

Taken aback, I paused.

It wasn't long until my arms found their way around her small frame returning the hug.

END FLASHBACK

"Mommy, you coming?"

Her sing song voice broke my focus.

I couldn't help but follow behind an excited Beth.

…..

(Anonymous point of view)

I was late, again!

Kurt was never going to forgive me.

Ever since his dad died, I decided to move back home and keep him and mom company. It hasn't been as easy as I thought.

I thought if I just gave Kurt whatever he needed, a facial, a hug and some alone time that he'd come along, but I knew better.

I know what loss is. 5 years ago, the pain was almost unbearable.

5 years wasn't enough to make me forget and to be honest, I'd rather hold onto the memories just to remind myself that it was real. That they are still out there somewhere.

I sighed as my ringtone interrupted my thoughts.

"Hey, I'm on my way. Sorry, I lost track of time."

"I'm at McKinley." Kurt said.

"I'm coming."

…

I found Kurt sitting at the Piano on the stage.

I sighed as my hands found my pockets.

The only sound was the clicking of my shoes against the old floors.

Kurt didn't turn to face me, so I sat with him at the Piano for a minute before my fingers danced across the first chords to Lecrae's song 'I'll Find you.'

Just Fight a little longer my friend

It's all worth it in the end

But when you got nobody to turn to

Just hold on and I'll find you

Kurt took a deep breath before whispering the next part.

They say fear haunts and pain hates

I say pain strengthens and fear drives faith

And I don't know all of the outcomes

Don't know what happens tomorrow

But when that ocean of doubt comes

Don't let me drown in my sorrow

Don't let me stay at the bottom

I feel like this hole is too deep to climb

I've been looking for a way out

But I'll settle for a peace of mind

Picking up the pieces of my life

And hoping that I'll put together something right

Tell me all I got is all I need

Tell me you going to help me stay and fight

Kurt trailed off as he fell on his knees sobbing uncontrollably.

With tears in my eyes, my arms found his delicate frame. Between tears and gritted teeth,

I rocked him as I continued with the chorus.

Just Fight a little longer my friend

It's all worth it in the end

But when you got nobody to turn to

Just hold on and I'll find you

I'll find you, I'll find you

Just hold on and I'll find you

I'm not sure how long Kurt and I rocked back and forth, but I knew that he needed this. I needed this.

Saddened by our reality, I drove him home only to face my own demons as the memories came flooding back.

The four years that I was away, my mom hadn't changed a thing about my room. Overwhelmed, I clutched the same sink in my bathroom for support only for my knees to give out.

I shrieked in agony on the cold tile floor until I didn't feel anything.

…

(Puck's point of view)

"A,B,C,D,EFG! H,I,J,K,LMNOP!" Beth and I sang at bath time.

Shelby was clearing up our dinner plates in the kitchen.

No more than ten minutes later, she popped her head in the bathroom and kissed Beth goodnight before running to her car hoping to dodge the rain.

I smiled when suddenly Beth splashed water on me.

"Hey you! You got me all wet!" I said in between a fit of laughter.

Beth was giggling uncontrollably when the thunder rumbled.

Surprised, we both jumped, getting water everywhere. I sighed while Beth laughed some more. She looked just like Quinn when she laughed. Those eyes, that voice gave me goosebumps. I sighed.

"Let's get some clothes on munchkin." I pressed gently while I grabbed the mop for the floor and a towel for Beth to dry off.

"Thanks Daddy!" She exclaimed kissing me on the cheek. I blushed.

Distracted by my own thoughts, I didn't realize the fireplace was still going strong until I went to put back the mop in the closet.

Before putting the fire out, Beth appeared in the doorway with a book in her hands.

"Daddy, can you read me a story?"

I couldn't say no to that face.

"Ok Beth, but just one story then it's bedtime."

She eagerly ran over to sit in my lap in front of the fireplace.

I read the family of Pigs to her, a short book about mama pig, papa pig and baby pig. I guess I should have been prepared for Beth's question but I wasn't.

In the smallest voice, she asked "could you tell me a story about my real mommy?" My face dropped.

My mouth was open, but no words came out. All of a sudden, my throat was dry.

Sensing my discomfort, Beth asked worried "Did you forget about her?"

"No sweetheart. I could never forget about your mother." I paused before hearing myself ask 'what do you want to know.'

"Why did she leave?"

"She left because she was afraid to disappoint you." I said after a while.

Beth looked at me with those beautiful eyes. Her mother's eyes.

"Daddy? Did she love us?"

I nodded.

"She loved us so much that she found us another mommy to help while she was gone." I kissed the top of her hair.

Satisfied, Beth's arms wrapped around my neck with her head pressing against my chest.

My heart skipped a beat as her breathing slowed and her grip on my neck loosened. I got Beth to her bed when it hit me: Quinn would never know who her child is. She would never be here for moments like this.

Beth would grow up never knowing her real mom and I couldn't do anything about that.

Unless, I recorded Beth for Quinn. I could save the files on my computer and send them to her, but I didn't have her email. I didn't even have her number anymore. She changed it when Beth was born. Clean break I guess.

I sighed my hands meeting my forehead.

I could write her letters! I still had her address. Well, Shelby had her information. I think, but Shelby would only feel guilty if she knew what I was doing, so I was all on my own with this one.

Nervous, and overwhelmed, I turned on my apple music, imagining Quinn singing instead of Rihanna.

I've been ignoring this big lump in my throat

I shouldn't be crying

Tears were for the weaker days

I'm stronger now, or so I say

But something's missing

Suddenly, I was daydreaming. I was no longer at home with Beth. I was at McKinley waiting for Quinn to join me on stage as I sang the next verse.

I found the one, she changed my life

But was it me that changed

And she just happened to come at the right time

I'm supposed to be in love

But I'm numb again

We lock hands harmonizing the next part.

What now? I just can't figure it out

What now? I guess I'll just wait it out (wait it out)

What now? Oh, oh, oh, oh! What now?

I put the song on repeat while I struggled for words for Quinn's first letter.

Q

I winced balling the paper up and tossing it in the trash.

Quinn,

A lot has happened in five years. Despite our differences, I've decided to give you something that you never offered me: A choice to get to know your daughter.

I don't want you to miss out on her life, so I'm going to update you in a letter every so often.

I think it's time you meet Beth.

She's the cutest thing growing on two feet, well besides her old man. She eats like her dad, talks like her mom, and dreams like her mom too.

She's ambitious the little one, always finding new ways to learn about her real mom. Always looking for a way to get closer to you without saying it out loud.

She's smart, and sometimes her innocence can fool the most critical person and when she gets caught, oh she can throw a good tantrum.

Something tells me you already knew that.

Anyway, I thought you should have this picture. It's her on her first day of school. If it warms your heart the way it touches mine, I'm sure you'll hate me now but thank me later.

And Quinn?

I'm sorry if this causes you more pain than good.

Puck

Relieved, I sealed the envelope.

I added her name and my P.O. Box in case it needed to be returned and just like that, the first letter was done!

Exhausted, I climbed into bed not even bothering to shut the music off.

….

DDDDIIINNNGGG!

(Finn's Point of view)

I never thought I'd miss hearing that obnoxious bell ring. I can't believe it's been four years already.

I smiled to myself, hugging my clipboard at the start of Glee.

"Welcome back everyone!" Mr. Shue beamed.

"This is Finn Hudson. He was in your seats four years ago when New Directions took regionals. He's going to be helping us out." He said gripping my shoulder as everyone clapped.

I smiled and waved looking at each student, when a familiar face took my breath away.

All of a sudden, the room was fuzzy.

"Finn, it's good to have you back." Mr. Shue said ushering me to a seat.

My legs felt bolted to the floor, but somehow, I dragged one in front of the other taking Mr. Shue's seat only two seats away from her.

Almost as if she felt me starring in her direction, our eyes met.

I froze. I haven't seen those eyes in five years.

I felt the headache coming on.

"Now, let's talk about our theme for the week!"

…

I never thought I'd be back at McKinley helping out with the Glee club without Rachel. I thought forever was longer than four years. I guess I was wrong.

I didn't think it would be this hard to focus until I got here. Ever since, it's almost like reliving losing it all.

I sat at the Piano in the Glee club. Who knew I'd learn how to play.

Truth is, I didn't want to, but my desire to play football quickly faded, so I found something else to do. Something that felt like home.

I didn't fight the chords that I played. I just wasn't expecting to someone to join me.

The sun goes down

The stars come out

And all that counts is here and now

My universe will never be the same

I'm glad you came…

Mr. Shue joined me at the piano. We sat in silence for a few, reflecting.

"Finn Hudson can play piano." Mr. Shue stated.

I chuckled as I walked over to my old seat, leaving Mr. Shue at the Piano.

"A lot has changed." I stated looking straight at the white board.

Mr. Shue agreed playing with his wedding ring.

"Some good, some bad." I continued.

He sighed, walking over to join me in the risers.

"I heard about Kurt's dad. I'm so sorry Finn. I know he was like a father to you." He hesitated.

I tensed up at the word father.

I was a father. I could have been her father, but I chose a new life. I chose to walk away.

The air must've gotten heavy because Mr. Shue patted me on the back.

"I'm here if you ever want to talk about it." He offered leaving me in my seat in the risers.

I knew I could always count on him to help me figure things out.

"Why don't you show me how you played those chords?" He invited.

I smirked.

…

(Anonymous point of view)

I stood in the halls of McKinley pressed up against my locker listening as Mr. Shue and Finn sang in between laughter. I smiled.

I'd do anything to give him the biggest hug. I missed him.

Apart from Puck, I didn't know a better man.

My brother was no saint but he wasn't a deadbeat either.

I sighed. I guess if anything, I should warn Puck that Finn is back. I knew what Beth meant to Puck, but I didn't know what Beth meant for this long-lost friendship. Once Finn figured out that Beth wasn't his, it would crush him.

I sighed, grateful that I didn't wear heels today and that the weather was still nice for me to walk home.

…