Kim had wandered all over Donovan Manor trying to find where Shane had gone. She had checked the garden and the stables. She had even gone to the thatch of trees that Shane had once told her was his favorite place on the estate when he was a boy. There was no sign of him.

"Ah, Madame Brady." Kim turned to see Worthington had come out of the kitchen. "I understand that you were looking for Master Donovan. The gamekeeper reported that he just returned from a ride and is in the stables."

"Thank you, Worthington," Kim said. So she had probably missed Shane on her first trip to the stables. Without hesitating, she left the house and headed over there.

She found him inside, sitting on the ground and leaning against a bale of hay. He was obviously lost in thought, because he otherwise would have turned as soon as she entered.

"Shane?"

He looked up. "Oh, Kim. I didn't see you." He spoke lightly, casually, as if nothing was wrong.

"You're not fooling anyone," she said. "At least, you're not fooling me. I've known you too long."

He frowned slightly and stood up. He walked over to one of the stalls so his back was to her. "I don't have the foggiest idea what you're talking about."

Kim smiled softly. "Come on, Shane. Don't do this. Don't try to pretend you're not hurting."

"I'm not pretending," he insisted, as he began running a hand along the muzzle of one of the horses. He still did not look at her. "I'm happy. Happy for Kayla and Steve. If anyone deserves to be happy, it's them." His voice had trailed off at the end, and Kim could detect a brittle undertone.

"And what about you?" she asked.

"Me? I'm fine."

"You always do this," she marveled.

"Do what?"

"Try to pretend you're some superman and bury your emotions. I've seen it too many times." Kim shook her head. "I know it hurts. You don't have to pretend with me. Don't run away and act like you're fine."

"Who's running away?" He still did not face her.

"You are, Shane. Or were we supposed to not notice that you disappeared for three hours right after we arrived?"

Shane continued to pet the horse, which nickered in response. "I wasn't disappearing. I went on a ride. Magic here needed some exercise."

God, Shane Donovan could be a complete pain in the ass, Kim thought. "Of course. You had to exercise that horse even though your son just arrived and you haven't seen him in a week."

"Kim, what do you want from me?" Some of that icy reserve was beginning to crack.

She walked over to him. "For once in your life, Shane, I want you to be open and honest. Don't push everyone away and act like nothing's happened."

"I'm not pushing anyone away," Shane said, sounding exasperated. "I'm sorry if I'm not acting like you think I should under the circumstances, but, as I said, I'm happy for Kayla and Steve." She put a hand on his shoulder, but he jerked away and still refused to look at her. "What do think I should be doing? Crying? Acting angry? Trying to break them up?"

"Any of those responses would be natural."

"Then I'm not natural, okay?" Whatever emotion had been in Shane's voice had disappeared. Coolly and calmly, he spoke. "If I didn't want this, I could've aborted the mission. I wouldn't have risked my life to get Steve back if I didn't want them to be together - if I didn't want Kay to be happy."

The way he said that made Kim blanch. Despite the unemotional tone, she could see what was obvious - he still cared for Kayla. Those feelings did not just disappear overnight. "Maybe you could come inside and spend some time with Andrew. That might take your mind off Kayla."

He shook his head. "I don't need distractions, Kim. I'm perfectly fine."

This is pointless, she thought. If he doesn't want my help, fine. But she had to try one more thing. "Shane, if you want to talk, I'm here. We may not be together, but I like to think that we can still be friends. And as your friend, I hate to see you hurting. What you did for Steve and Kayla was incredible and I'm sorry that you've been hurt."

He spun around and finally faced her. "Look, Kim, the last thing I need - or want - is your pity."

Kim's sympathy was running out. "I don't pity you, Shane Donovan, but I do care about you. We were together too long for me just to stop caring about you."

"Oh, so that's it," he said, his voice rising. "You see this as an opening. Now that Kayla's out of the way, maybe you can get back in my bed. Or is that just because Lawrence Alamain isn't available to keep you occupied."

His words hit her like a slap in the face, and she could feel tears welling up in her eyes, but she fought them. Her entire body shook with pain and anger. How dare he? she thought.

It seemed to register with Shane what he had just said, and he sighed deeply. His voice lowered. "I'm sorry, Kim. I didn't mean that."

"Oh, yes you did," Kim said. "You just can't let anything go. Not Victor, not Cal, and, now, not Lawrence." Fine, she thought. If he wants to do the cold act, I can do it too. She clenched her jaw before she spoke again. "I assume there was some reason you wanted me to come here. It wasn't just to make Kayla jealous enough to come along, so why don't you tell me and we can get down to business."

"Kim," he said softly.

"No, Captain," she responded. "I'm here on the ISA's dime, so tell me what you want and I'll begin working."

Shane turned and she could see his shoulders shaking as he composed himself. When he turned back, he had a stony look that betrayed no emotion. "It's Steve," he said, evenly. "We know he was mistreated while he was missing, most likely by Lawrence's people. He was violent with the doctors that tried to treat him, and we suspect that he is suffering from-"

"Post-traumatic Stress Disorder?" Kim asked, knowing that was what he was going to say.

"Yes," Shane said. "Before he goes back to Salem, we need to know if he's a danger. To Kayla, to Stephanie, even to himself."

Kim had to wonder if Shane hoped that would be the case. Maybe if Steve was too unstable, he would scare Kayla away.

Shane continued. "He'll fight you on this. He won't want to admit anything."

"And here I was thinking I was the professional," Kim muttered. "You don't think I know that, Dr. Donovan?" When he said nothing more, she asked, "Anything else you want to add?"

"No," he said, quietly. "That's it."

"Fine. I'll get to work." Kim spun on her heels and stalked out of the stables. To hell with Shane Donovan, she thought, not for the first time. To hell with him. Yet she also wondered again why fate had cursed her by making her love the man.