It was another lesson on the Grail War, but this time Kaede had been introduced to something...odd.
"What's this?" asked Shiro.
"You know that habit of Gil's that I seem to have picked up?"
"You mean manga and anime?" asked Shiro.
"Well apparently we're not the only Magi who have it. I ran into that weird apostle guy again, and he handed me something to put into my computer," said Kaede.
"Weird...apostle...guy?" said Kiritsugu, a pit in his stomach.
"Yeah, the one who got me hooked into summons and that series Chrono Crusade. He said he heard about our lessons and wanted to give us a minor boost," said Kaede very confused.
"By any chance was he an older man with a beard and happened to vanish much like a wizard would only without the crack?" asked Kiritsugu in dread.
"Hai!" said Kaede far too cheerfully.
"Dammit...not again..." muttered Kiritsugu.
Rin showed up and saw the flash drive.
"What the hell is that thing?"
"Flash drive. Hang on while I start the show!" said Kaede far too cheerfully.
Kiritsugu took one look at the information on the flash drive...and face planted.
It was some weird Omake series called 'Please! Einzbern Consultation Room' that Zelretch had found and thought amusing. One of the main stars was his dead wife Irisviel...and some girl named Zecchan who apparently was of the opinion he was 'creepy'. (AN:THIS IS ACTUALLY ON YOUTUBE.)
While it did explain the basics rather well, the theatrics and reminder of his dead wife he could do without. He left before he saw the ending though.
"What...the...hell?" said Rin.
"Did that weird vampire give you this?" asked Shiro tiredly.
Kaede nodded.
"Kaede-chan...could you do us a favor?" asked Shiro.
"What?"
"Quit accepting things from that damn Zelretch!" shouted Rin.
(Sorry, had to get that out of my system...back to the real story!)
Gil looked at the hedge maze with distaste... at least now he could eat the food prepared. Though for some reason the elves had continued to dose the children despite the fact that it was pointless.
At this juncture, it was entirely likely that the culprit was unaware of the fact they knew, or that the teachers had taken to patrolling the kitchens to catch the one responsible.
The last task was a maze, at the end of which they had to retrieve the same cup that had dragged him into this nonsense.
Gil wasn't going to settle for just grabbing the thing...he was going to completely destroy it.
"In one month we'll go into the third phase. Gil, as the lead in points you'll be first of course," said Bagman grandly.
"Che. Remember Brit, I have no interest in your so called prize, and the fame is nothing compared to what I already have," snapped Gil.
He didn't like this...he was falling into familiar patterns of arrogant behavior and it was bothering him. Around Kaede, that wasn't a problem. But without her...he was quickly returning to being Gilgamesh rather than just Gil.
And to be perfectly honest, he didn't really like Gilgamesh that much, despite all the power, fame and wealth he had. As the old saying went...it's lonely at the top.
Gil had a sudden chill go down his back. Something horrible had just happened.
Kaede was walking home from normal school when she ran into him again.
Kischur Zelretch Schweinorg, the Wizard Marshal and master of Kaleidoscope.
Also known as Rin's Bane.
"Hello again Kaede-chan!" he said cheerfully.
Kaede leveled a look at him.
"You're about to do something that will anger Rin again aren't you?"
"Hehehe...maybe~" grinned Zelretch.
"What are you going to give me this time...and why do you keep using me to anger her?"
"One, you're the only person who knows who I am and still accept things from me. Two, because you've got a talent for sorcery and I don't want to see it go to waste. Plus you always give me pictures of her reaction after anyway," smirked the old vampire.
"True. Which sorcery?"
"The third one. You didn't think summoning half of Gilgamesh was an accident did you?" he answered her.
"Wait, only half?"
"Fufufu... The night you summoned Gilgamesh, his soul was split into two classes. One's in the Church, under the Archer class, while yours is the Saber. I've looked at your Gil, and he seems to embody all the better traits of the Golden King, while the other is rather arrogant. By the time the Fifth Grail War ends, only one of the personalities will survive."
Kaede shivered. She didn't want to lose Gil.
"Which is why I've come to drop something off!" he said far too cheerfully.
"Like I said, you're mostly doing this to annoy Rin again aren't you?" she said dryly.
"Well, that's a bonus," he admitted.
"So what exactly are you dumping on me this time?" she asked tiredly.
He handed her some sort of odd thing with six wings attached. Her eyebrows twitched rampantly.
"Please tell me this is not what I think it is..." she asked.
Zelretch just grinned.
"Rin will kill me if I show up home with that thing!" she said flatly.
"Yes, but consider this. With the Kaleidostick with you, you won't actually need a Servant to nab the Grail."
"Why would I want the Grail? The thing's broken!" she said.
"Hmm, a valid counter argument. How about this, accept the staff and you can use it to discipline Gil and later Saber when they get out of hand," he said.
"By discipline you mean..."
"Spam their attacks," he answered readily.
"Does this thing copy any Servant I come across?"
"So long as you can touch them physically yes."
"Again, why do I know Rin is going to kill me for bringing this home with me?"
Zelretch just smirked.
Rin's eyebrow twitched rampantly, and it didn't look like she would be stopping anytime soon.
"Kaede-chan...what have we said about accepting gifts from strangers?" asked Kiritsugu tiredly.
"But I knew him," deadpanned Kaede.
"Kaede, they don't get much stranger than Zelretch!" shouted Rin.
In Kaede's hand was a Kaleidostick...though thankfully it wasn't Ruby or Sapphire. Zelretch seemed to enjoy his personal messenger of headaches (Kaede) enough that he made a new one. Kaleidostick Amethyst.
He even included all the cards that went with it, though she would have to wait until the next Grail War (or until Gil got back for the eighth card) before she could actually use them. He even included a helpful instruction manual for the thing.
"Kaede...I thought I said no more accepting gifts from that old vampire..." said Kiritsugu.
"He said it was a disciplinary tool for Gil and any Servants I summon later. And that if I survived to the end I wouldn't even need a Servant to grab the Grail so he can destroy it permanently."
She deliberately didn't mention that she could potentially unlock the Third True Magic, which was the entire purpose for the Grail War. Rin was in a bad enough mood already.
Zelretch said that she was almost ready to manifest the Sorcery...she just had to wake it up first. For now she was going to forget he said anything. She was a Witch, not a Magus.
Gil looked at the maze with disgust. One of the things the judges hadn't said was that the Quidditch pitch was entirely off-limits, so he spent a few hours each day memorizing the layout from one of the towers. Then he spent an hour making sure his map was accurate. They never said that he could only bring his 'wand' to the third task, but it was more implied.
He wanted to finish this and be done with it.
Kaede launched herself at Gil when they came back to England.
It took him exactly six seconds to realize something was off about her.
"Did you change your hair color?" he asked.
Where her hair was once pure red the color of bright flames, it was now liberally streaked with gold...a color he had last seen on Saber, her ancestor.
Her bangs were now entirely gold.
"I know, right? We woke up one morning and originally we thought she was going white early," said Shiro tiredly.
Ever since then her hair had slowly been changing from red to gold.
"Any idea what caused it?" he asked.
Gil remembered very well that her hair had been a dirty black when they first met, yet after she washed it, it had become red the color of flames. Perhaps this was another transformation?
"No...but it started the morning after he made another appearance..." said Kiritsugu irritably.
Gil turned to his Master.
"Kae...what have we said about accepting things from Zelretch?"
"He mostly did it to piss off Rin?" she offered.
Gil sighed. Why, oh why did his Master trust that asshole?
"Please tell me you at least have a plan," said Kiritsugu to Gil privately.
"These people are idiots. They never banned the overlooking view of the maze outright or the idea that someone would think to make a map and put it in their pocket. I also procured some hair spray from some of the Gryffindor girls, and a simple fire spell would allow me to access the easier routes through the maze. All I have to do is knock over the stupid cup and we're done with this hellhole," said Gil flatly.
Kiritsugu nodded appreciatively.
"Gil, take this as a good luck charm," said Kaede, handing him an odd card. It had a single word on it, and a picture of a noble with a crown.
Ruler.
"What's this?" asked Gil.
"According to the manual Zelretch gave me for the staff, Ruler is an unknown Servant class that can override a Master's Command Seal. They have the same stats as Saber with Archer's Independent Action ability. They're supposed to be a Mediator for the Grail wars, but Avenger usually gets summoned instead."
"And why not hand me the Saber card?" asked Gil, honestly curious.
"Zelretch said that if I want these cards to work like they're supposed to, I have to come in physical contact with the Servants. And since Shiro-nii has that, well I want to save Saber for her."
"Smart."
"I think Zelretch was trying to warn me. That your Class will change during the war..."
Gil looked at Kaede.
"You're afraid something will happen don't you?"
"He said that I only summoned half of you. That's why your Class changed from Archer to Saber..." she whispered.
"I was afraid of that. For now let's wait until we get home before we figure out what to do about that," said Gil.
Gil waited before he entered the maze. Using a minor light charm, he looked at his map before taking a right. Thanks to his map (and liberal use of a fire spell and flammable liquids) Gil made it to the center in ten minutes.
He picked up a decent sized rock and tossed it at the cup. It was more of a precautionary measure than anything, as he was well aware of what a port key was.
So to his minor disappointment, the cup vanished the moment the rock knocked it off the pedestal. Too bad...he had a Noble Phantasm ready to destroy the damn thing.
The maze fell down, as they were charmed to self-destruct the moment the cup left the pedestal.
Seeing the shocked looks of everyone, the entire crowd took a moment before they cheered. It was an abrupt end to a rather boring tournament, and it was the champion who sent their familiar in their place who won.
Seeing their disbelieving looks, Gil shrugged.
"You never banned us from making a map, and I'm in the art club," he said in way of explanation.
Seeing the surprised looks on the judges, it was clear that the idea of a champion making a map by using an overlooking view had never even occurred to them.
Bagman suddenly noticed something.
"Where's the goblet?"
"Some idiot turned it into a portkey. I threw a rock at it to knock it off just in case. A pity, because I fully planned to destroy it if it wasn't," he said bluntly.
And so the whole nonsense ended.
"Thank the gods! I hate England!" said Gil, taking a deep breath of Japanese air.
After the entire mess with the Goblet of Fire, Gil had narrowly managed to avoid the Englishmen's attempts to bring his master back.
He came home to find it in an uproar, and it didn't take a genius to figure out why.
Kaede had, in a fit of boredom, decided to practice with the Kaleidostick Amethyst to Rin's increasing irritation.
Gil took one look at those fluffy little cat ears and had to lean against the side of the door from laughing so hard. It didn't help that for some reason she had a tail to go along with it that looked like it came off a lion, or that she had somehow grown claws to boot.
He found Shiro holding a camera and taking plenty of blackmail pictures for later.
"You know once you get over the shock...it's not actually that bad?" said Kaede in surprise.
"Does this mean I can drag you to cosplay conventions and you won't hex me for it?" said Gil smirking.
Kaede hated dressing up!
"Possibly, if I choose the costume first."
"So what's with the armor? I mean with that get-up you almost look like a two-toned Saber, only without the stray hair that she had," said Gil.
"Would you believe that this is the same dress I wore to that ball?" she asked.
"Considering who made it, absolutely," he said honestly.
Her dress was white as fallen snow, with mithril armor and black outlines. She looked like a proper English Knight, the female version anyway. Her back was exposed as was most of her shoulders. The dress itself looked like a lily that had opened up, and her hair was held back by a large black ribbon. With her looks and the fact her hair had been going blond for some time, she looked like a more feminine version of Saber.
"Saber Lily," snorted Gil.
"That's actually not a bad name for her," said Kiritsugu. He had the same opinion of that outfit that Gil did. She looked like a pure, more feminine version of Saber in that outfit and with her hair held back.
"It actually suits you," said Shiro in surprise.
Gil smirked.
"I guess when the Fae decided to make you armor, they do so in a way that it can still be classed as beautiful. Who would have expected something like this when they made that dress for you?" said Gil.