A/N: Wow thanks for the great reviews last chapter I am so glad you all like this story so much. It is near and dear to my heart. This chapter takes on Christmas. A little heavy and a little light. I see last chapter as on of two major shifts in Quinn's relationship with the new people in her family. The next won't be for another few chapters, but once that happens you'll see this story take a different tone or path shall we say, but I am getting ahead of myself. I hope you all like this chapter and it was worth the wait (sorry for the long time between posts). Disclaimer: I do not own GLEE or it's characters. GLEE belongs to it's creators and FOX.
Quinn trudged into the kitchen around 11am on Christmas morning. She was exhausted from the previous night and frankly had been nervous to see Judy. Sure Judy hadn't beat her or even locked her in the closet last night but that didn't mean she hadn't changed her mind. Quinn was so confused, the rational side of her knew that that punishments she endured from Russell were wrong, would be considered child abuse by any court. She'd acknowledged this a year ago but it wasn't until now, when she was finally away from him, that she truly began t understand and realize how wrong Russell had been, that she hadn't deserved his cruelity. However with that being said, there was that piece of her that was still little Lucy Fabray who thought her father knew everything and that she truly deserved the beatings and abuse.
Shaking her head she cleared her mind of those dark times. Judy was different that was obvious, and Quinn needed to remember that. She couldn't slip again. It would do no one good for Judy to go after Russell now. He was gone and Quinn was safe and that was how she wanted it to stay.
"Merry Christmas sleepy head." Judy smiled as Quinn sat down across from her.
"Merry Christmas. I am sorry I missed church." Quinn apologized. It was only as she read the kitchen clock that it registered to her that they should have been at church hours ago.
Judy shrugged, "Its alright. I figured you needed the sleep. I think God will forgive us this once."
Quinn stared at Judy, there was no way Russell would have said anything like that.
"What? Do I have yogurt on my face."
Quinn shook her head, "No its just, Russell would have flipped if I made him late for church, especially on Christmas. Seven am sharp was church until 1 o'clock when we went to serve lunch at the community center, than dinner was at 5 o'clock; at 6 o'clock prayers until bed at 8 o'clock. He was strict about our Christmas schedule."
Strict was an understatement. Russell Fabray used Christmas as his way to prove to everyone in Belleville what an exemplary Christian he was. Church, community service, prayer that was all that Christmas was to him. Of course as Russell Fabray's perfect Christian daughter she did everything her father told her to do.
"That's it?"
"Yeah, why what do you do?" Quinn asked curious. She'd seen the Berry/Fabray Christmas Eve traditions so she wondered what they did on actual Christmas.
"Well I usually go to 9 o'clock service. Than at noon I go to the Berry's and we open presents from one another, Leroy and Hiram usually give Rachel her Santa presents while I am at church, than we start cooking dinner around 1:30. After dinner we go Christmas caroling around the neighborhood. And if Hanukah falls on the same day we do Jewish traditions at night."
Quinn gulped, "Presents?"
"Yeah. I have yours here. We can do them together if you want before we go over to the Berry's that is if you want to go to the Berry's we don't have too if you just want to stay here." Judy sounded nervous when she mentioned going to the Berry's but Quinn didn't pay attention she was having a heart attack. Judy had gotten her presents. Real presents. Quinn hadn't gotten Judy anything. She didn't even think about it.
"I uh, I don't mind where you do presents. I…" She looked away in shame, "I don't have any presents for you."
"Quinn that is alright, you didn't have too." Judy said kindly but Quinn was crying now. "Oh honey it is okay."
Quinn shuddered as guilt and anger filled her, "No, no it isn't. You've been so great to me, so kind and I didn't even think to get you a gift." Quinn pushed her tears from her cheeks. "I am so sorry Judy, I didn't mean to rude or ungrateful its just…"
Judy laid a hand on her shoulder which caused Quinn to look up at her, "Just what honey?"
"I…I haven't gotten a Christmas present since Frannie died. Russell…" Quinn looked down again, "I was never good enough to get any." Judy sighed so Quinn tried to play her words off, "Plus Russell didn't really believe in the commercialization of the holiday."
Suddenly Quinn was in Judy's embrace and Judy was speaking softly into her ear, "I don't know as much about you as I want or wish I knew, Lu Bug, but one thing I know is that you are a great daughter, a beautiful person, and a kind soul. You have always deserved Christmas gifts. Christmas is not about earning gifts for being good, its about showing those you love how much your care and love them, about making your loved ones happy. Its about the giving."
"I don't have anything for you."
Judy kissed her temple, "Just being her, letting me into your life, is enough gift for me, the most beautiful gift you could have ever given me."
Quinn nodded but she felt bad still. She'd come up with a gift, she had too.
Judy pulled away and smile, "Now should we eat or do you want your presents?"
Quinn blushed, "gifts?" she inquired she was suddenly excited, this was going to be a great Christmas.
Judy ruffled Quinn's hair and laughed, "Come one then, they are under the tree."
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Judy couldn't help but smile as Quinn excitedly showed Rachel the gifts she'd gotten and Rachel hers. At first Quinn had panicked realizing she hadn't gotten any of the Berry's gifts either, but Judy reassured her it was alright and that she had put Quinn's name on the gifts too. Quinn visibly relax after that and now it was like Quinn was a carefree teenager. She seemed content as she sat on the floor talking about music and books with Rachel.
"Hey," Leroy plopped on next to her and handed her an egg nog. "She seems much happier. Really excited about her presents."
"You'd be excited too if these were the first Christmas presents you'd received in eight years." Judy said bitterly. The more and more she learned of Quinn's life with Russell the more furious Judy became. She still couldn't banish the image of Quinn offering her a belt or sitting in the closet out of her mind. Quinn swore that Russell hadn't been abusive, but Judy wasn't sure she believe her daughter. It was too odd for Quinn or any kid to assume a punishment that they'd only ever been told of.
"Your joking right?" Leroy said with disbelief.
"No. She broke down in tears when she realized I had gotten her gifts and she hadn't gotten me anything. Apparently Russell doesn't believe in the commercialization of Christmas, though I believe he loved it when I was buying him expensive gifts, and Quinn was and I quote 'never good enough to receive any.'"
"That's crap." Leroy bit out as he threw his arm around her squeezing tight.
"I know and I told Quinn that. Lee," she turned to look her best friend in the eyes, "I…I think Russell was abusive to Quinn, like physically." Leroy didn't respond at first. His eyes drifted to Quinn who was pointing to a picture in a magazine she was showing Rachel.
"I hate to say it Judes but you maybe right. Quinn she exhibits some classic signs of an abused child. She flinches you know, when she is around Hiram and me and we are loud or make a sudden movement."
"I hadn't noticed that." Judy admitted.
"She is good at hiding it, Hiram hasn't noticed either. But I know." He looked at Judy and she knew what he meant. Leroy's father hadn't been a gentle or calm disciplinarian.
"I haven't even told you what she did when I got home last night."
"What did she do?"
Judy shook her head. Quinn had just turned to her and gave her a small smile. "Not today, its Christmas we should be happy."
"Your right, come on I think Hiram is almost done with dinner."
Dinner was a peaceful and calm affair. Rachel and Quinn talked about glee and what songs Mr. Schuester might choose for regionals. After dinner they went caroling as usual. Now it was getting late and the troop of carolers finally returned home to crash around the fire.
"Should we watch a movie?" Hiram asked.
"Yes! A White Christmas." Rachel voted.
"How about we let Quinn choose." Leroy said firmly but kindly to his daughter.
"Oh I don't mind, but first, well I'd like to give Judy a gift." Quinn said nervously. Judy was surprised and endeared at how shy Quinn suddenly looked.
"Honey you don't need to give me anything." Judy reassured her again.
"I know, but I want to do this."
"Alright, what is it?" Judy knew Quinn didn't have anything, she hadn't gotten a chance to shop today, not that any of the stores were open.
Quinn blushed more and turned to Leroy, "May I borrow your piano?"
"By all means." Leroy smiled.
Judy felt herself get antsy as Quinn walked to the piano. She sat gracefully and rested her hands on the ivory. The anticipation was killing Judy. Though she'd heard Quinn sing in glee she had never heard a solo from her daughter, nor did she know Quinn could play the piano.
A gentle familiar tune floated through the air to Judy's ears, it was beautiful. Quinn's fingers moved expertly across the keys and then a gentle yet strong voice joined the tune.
O Holy Night! The stars are brightly shining,
It is the night of the dear Saviour's birth.
Long lay the world in sin and error pining.
Till He appeared and the Spirit felt its worth.
A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices,
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.
Fall on your knees! Oh, hear the angel voices!
O night divine, the night when Christ was born;
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!
A calmness flowed over Judy as she listened to Quinn's angelic voice lift the word of Christ birth to the Lord. Judy had never been so moved by a rendition of her favorite Christmas hymn. She lend back into Leroy's side and felt content.
Led by the light of faith serenely beaming,
With glowing hearts by His cradle we stand.
O'er the world a star is sweetly gleaming,
Now come the wisemen from out of the Orient land.
The King of kings lay thus lowly manger;
In all our trials born to be our friends.
He knows our need, our weakness is no stranger,
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!
Quinn's piano playing was just as gorgeous as her voice. Judy could see a twinkle in her daughters eyes as she played. It was clear to Judy that Quinn had transcended to another place beyond the living room. She'd never seen Quinn so at home in her own body. It was like looking at a different child, Quinn was even more beautiful than normal as she sang and played. Tears flowed from Judy's eyes.
Truly He taught us to love one another,
His law is love and His gospel is peace.
Chains he shall break, for the slave is our brother.
And in his name all oppression shall cease.
Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,
With all our hearts we praise His holy name.
Christ is the Lord! Then ever, ever praise we,
His power and glory ever more proclaim!
His power and glory ever more proclaim!
As the final chord faded their was silence. Judy stood and walked to Quinn pulling her into a hug. "So beautiful. I loved it thank you so much. The best present I have ever received."
"Really, I mean it was just a song, but I remembered you saying it was your favorite."
"Really. My favorite Christmas song sung to me by the most important person to me, it was precious."
Quinn suddenly hugged Judy tightly and Judy knew that they would be okay. That the road in front of them was treacherous with holes, steep cliffs, and unsure footing, but together, she and Quinn they would make it to the top, Judy just knew it.
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