Steve walked onto the patio and stopped. The cool evening air chilled him, but it was Kayla who brought him up short. She was sitting in a lounge chair staring out at the broad expanse of sky. She looked beautiful, but there was a haunted look on her face that chilled him far more than the evening breeze.

"Hey baby," he said quietly, not wanting to startle her. "What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing," Kayla said, shaking her head.

"Come on, baby," Steve replied. He knew she was keeping something from him. "I saw the look on your face and that was definitely not a "nothing" face."

Kayla turned away for a moment. Steve stepped beside her and sat down on the adjoining chair.

"Kayla?"

Turning back to face him, Kayla said quietly, "I was thinking about the night you died - or that I thought you'd died. I went to the loft, stood on the roof, and looked at the sky. The stars were so bright and I even saw a shooting star. I don't think I've ever felt so alone in my whole life." She shrugged her shoulders. "Something about the sky tonight reminded me of that night I guess."

Steve felt a lump in his throat as he saw the sadness in Kayla's eyes. He opened his arms saying, "Come here, Sweetness."

Kayla moved over and into Steve's arms. He could feel her shaking and felt her tears on his shoulder. After a few moments, Kayla leaned back and looked at Steve. He reached out and gently wiped the tears from her eyes.

"I'm sorry you had to go through all of that, Sweetness. But I'm here now and you never have to be alone like that again."

"You can't guarantee that, Steve. Nobody can." The sadness was still there.

"No, I can't guarantee it, baby." Steve said, his own sadness matching hers. "But you don't have to be alone now. I can guarantee that."

Kayla pulled away from him and returned to her chair. Steve could tell that something was still bothering her. "Kayla? Tell me what's wrong?"

Kayla sighed, then asked, "Do you really want to know?"

Steve was taken aback. "Of course I want to know. How can you ask that? If something's wrong, I want to help you."

"It hasn't really felt that way lately, Steve," Kayla said. "I know it's mostly my fault because I didn't tell you about Shane right away, but since you found out, it's felt like you haven't really cared what I was feeling - not while you were gone and not now."

"Wait a minute, Kayla," Steve said, feeling defensive. "I admit I was upset when I found out, but come on, baby, you can't really blame me for that, given the way it happened."

"No, I can't blame you for being upset," Kayla said, sounding tired. "I know I messed up. I should have told you."

Kayla stood and began pacing around the patio. "But it hurts that you never even tried to understand why I didn't tell you right away. And it hurts that once you learned about Shane, you seemed to think that I just moved on with my life, that I didn't hurt when you were gone, and that what I felt didn't matter."

Steve was startled by Kayla's words. He thought back over the last few weeks and realized she was right in some ways. Once the truth about Shane had been revealed, he had been so focused on his own anger and hurt that he had stopped considering her pain during the time he was gone. He had let her tell him what she was feeling and why she got involved with Shane, but only as a way of explaining her relationship with Shane.

"I'm sorry, baby. I never meant to make you feel that way."

"I know you didn't, Steve. But I need to know that you understand that, no matter what happened with Shane, it didn't change the way I felt when I lost you."

Steve was silent. He wanted to tell her he did understand that but he was not sure he could. He did not doubt Kayla's love for him - not then and not now. But it did not change the fact that Shane had stepped right in and taken Steve's place in Kayla's life.

"Steve?" Kayla said, the question clear in her voice.

Now it was Steve's turn to pace. "I know how much you love me, Kayla," he said, trying to find the right words. "And I don't doubt that you mourned me, baby. I can't imagine how I could survive losing you, so I know that it must have been very painful." He paused.

"But?" There was an edge in Kayla's voice.

"But I can't pretend that it doesn't feel like you found someone to replace me in your life - and in our daughter's life."

Steve watched Kayla turned away, stung by his words. He felt guilty immediately. He did not want to hurt her, but he had to be honest with how he felt. He walked over to Kayla and touched her on the shoulder.

"I'm sorry if that hurts you. I really am. But I can't help how I feel."

"No, I guess you can't," Kayla said. "I'm just not sure what I can do to make you feel differently. I told you what happened. I've tried to explain why and I've tried to tell you - and show you - in every way I can that I never stopped loving you."

"I know you have. And I believe you. But every time I see Donovan, I see the man who protected my family, who cared for you and comforted you, and who provided for you. Everything I was supposed to do but didn't."

"Nobody could ever take your place," Kayla said firmly. "I wish you would believe that."

Steve took a deep breath, trying to release the tension building inside. "I'm trying, baby. It's just hard to do sometimes."

"I know. But I meant what I said the other day." She looked him in the eye. "If you don't find a way to make peace with what happened between me and Shane, it's always going to be between us."

Steve was silent. That was the invisible wall between them, even now. No matter how much he loved her and how much she loved him, he couldn't forget that the man to whom he owed his life had also been the man who had replaced him in his wife's and daughter's lives. He thought back to the way he had taunted Shane in the kitchen that morning. He had been out of line, but he could not help himself. It had been too tempting to make sure Shane was aware that he, himself, had been replaced.

Finally, he spoke. "All I can do is to keep trying, Kayla." He moved to her and took her in his arms, holding her tightly against him. "I'm sorry that I've been so wrapped up in my own hurt that I didn't see yours. Just don't give up on me. Please don't ever give up on me."

He heard a muffled, "I won't." Sighing softly, he pulled her even tighter to his chest and let the feel of her body next to his soothe his fears.