Chapter 21
"Guess who I saw at the park last night," Eriol said as soon as he sat down across from Hiro in a coffee shop.
A little distracted on his laptop, he absently replied, "Huh?"
"Kohei."
He blinked and looked up then. "Who's that?"
"Kohei – the guy Sakura –"
"OHH, Sakura's Kohei! Well, not Sakura's Kohei anymore, but Kohei, the guy engaged-"
"Yeah, yeah. I thought Sakura said he went to Okinawa. Or Osaka? Or somewhere?"
"Yeah she did mention that. What's he doing back here?"
"How would I know? I just saw the guy run past me."
Hiro threw him a look. "Are you sure it was him? It could've been a look-alike."
"No, it was him. I followed him around for a while."
At that Hiro chuckled. "I never pegged you for a stalker. It suits you."
Eriol punched his shoulder. "Shut up, I'm just looking out for the two of them. Well, not that he ever did anything bad to Sakura. Just…you know."
Hiro leaned back against his chair. "I'm seeing Syaoran tonight for soccer. Should I mention it?"
"You are? And you didn't invite me?" Eriol asked, a little offended.
"Cos you always say you hate it after a game."
"So? It's a good workout. Did you invite Taka?"
"No."
"What! We're both coming."
Hiro shrugged. "Fine. Anyway," he brought up again, "since we'll both be there, should we tell him? I don't know. I don't have experience with…drama."
"If I don't say anything and they bump into him somewhere in the city, I might feel guilty," Eriol reasoned, stroking his chin in thought. "Or if I pretend I didn't see him…it wouldn't be a problem."
A little simple-minded, Hiro just nodded with agreement. "Yeah I see your point. So, don't tell him?"
Eriol slowly nodded. "Yeah, let's…not. So since when have you and Syaoran been playing soccer together? On your own. Without us."
::::::
After a fifteen-minute game, Taka asked for a timeout. Resting at the side of the field, the four men drank their sports drinks and wiped their faces with towels. Though it was mid-November, they still managed to play soccer outdoors.
"When it starts snowing, where are you guys planning to play?" Eriol asked, sitting on the grass.
"Renting out a gym's no fun," Syaoran answered. "It's not the same as actual grass. I don't know. If Hiro can take it, I'll still play out here."
"Yeah man, let's keep playing here. I don't exercise regularly so this is good for me," Hiro answered.
"Seriously? You guys are crazy. I can't even feel my hands. They've gone blue," Taka announced. "It's freezing."
Syaoran chuckled. "You didn't have to come."
"Some loser dragged me out here."
Eriol rolled the comment off. "I run every night all year round anyway. I'm used to the cold. I was just wondering what you guys would do. Count me in. I'll come rain or shine. Or snow."
"Good! Maybe we could join some kind of recreational team or something," Syaoran said after a moment. "It'd be nice to play an actual game again. You in, Taka?"
He groaned. "If I say no, I'll feel like I'm missing out. Fine."
After another few minutes, the men got up and started another round of soccer. With only four of them though, in a matter of five minutes, they grew tired of running around the field, trying to get the ball into the goal. At one point, the ball strayed away and rolled off one end of the field.
Closer to the ball, Syaoran ran after it. While he was away, Eriol groaned loudly.
Taka glanced over at him. "What?"
"Oh man it's eating at me. I should tell him."
"What. But you said not to," Hiro mildly protested.
"I know, but it keeps chipping away at my conscience. I should tell him."
Confused, Takashi said, "Tell him what? What happened?"
"I saw Kohei."
His brow rose. "Really?"
"The other day. Looks like he's back in town. I don't know if it was just a visit or whatever it was. Anyway, I saw him. I figured it would be all right not to tell him, but-"
"Yeah don't tell him," Taka interrupted. "What would Syaoran do with that information anyway? You don't even know if the guy's staying around or not."
"Yeah but in case they do bump into each other, shouldn't he at least get a heads-up or something? Or should I tell Sakura first? Ahh…"
After a few minutes, Syaoran came walking back to them, the ball in his arm. The expression on his face seemed a little serious. Hiro, Taka, and Eriol exchanged glances.
"You all right?" Eriol asked tentatively.
"Yeah." He frowned. "I just saw Kohei."
Eriol's heart dropped. Oh what were the frickin' odds.
"Where?"
"He caught the ball actually. It kept rolling down the hill."
"Did you talk to him?" Taka spoke up.
"Ah, not really. He just passed me the ball."
"Did he know it was you?"
Syaoran nodded, running a hand through his hair. "Man, I didn't know he was back. I thought he was gone for good. That kind of complicates things, doesn't it?"
"I wonder how long he's been back," Taka offered thoughtfully. "Has Sakura mentioned him being back at the office?"
"No, she hasn't. Oh man. I didn't see this coming."
Guilt raining on him, Eriol came over and put a hand on his shoulder. "I should've told you sooner, Li. I saw him the other day when I went for a run."
Syaoran looked at him in surprise. "What?"
"I thought it was just my imagination, but it turned out to be him. I just…didn't know how to tell you. Sorry," he said, disappointed in himself.
"Me too. Eriol told me today. We both thought…it was better not to tell you," Hiro added quietly. "But we should've. Sorry man."
"Huh." Syaoran looked off in thought. "Well, even if you did tell me, I'd still have this reaction. Forget it," he said, shrugging off their apologies. "I should talk to Sakura though."
"Good idea."
Without much more delay, Syaoran passed the ball to Hiro and grabbed his things. In a matter of minutes, he was out of sight. Left alone, the three looked at each other, feeling like awful friends.
"What were the odds Syaoran would meet him today?" Eriol muttered, knocking his head with his fist. "You're such a dumbass," he said to himself. "That was your best friend. You should've done a better job protecting him."
"Don't beat yourself up, Hira," Takashi called, bending down and picking up his duffel bag too. "We're out of it now. I just hope they'll be all right."
:::
Surprised to see him standing at his door in dirty sports clothes, Sakura crossed her arms in front of her. "Why are you here? You're not coming in here wearing that."
"What?" He glanced down at his outfit. "It's just grass stains."
"Don't you have a change of clothes?"
He frowned. "Why does it matter? Look, I have to talk to you about something."
Realizing then that he was in a bit of a foul mood, Sakura withdrew a little. "Fine." She opened the door wider.
"Thanks." He took off his shoes at the entrance and went into the living room. Sakura followed, studying him from behind.
"What do you have to talk to me about?"
"I saw Kohei today."
Nothing could have floored her more. "Sorry?"
"The guys and I were playing soccer at the park. I don't even know where he came from, but he suddenly appeared in front of me. Your ex-fiancé was there, looking the same as always. Tell me you didn't know."
A little taken aback, Sakura defended herself. "Of course not! This is the first time I'm hearing about this. I...I…" With thoughts going through her mind in rapid-fire, she blinked several times, trying to figure it out. "Why is he back? I thought he left for good. And you saw him? Where? That doesn't matter. This doesn't make sense."
Syaoran watched the emotions go across her face. Why he suddenly felt on guard and tense, he didn't know, but he felt entirely too uncomfortable now. He sighed then.
Walking over to her, he grabbed her shoulders. "So he didn't call you?"
Facing him, she said firmly, "No."
He nodded. "All right. Sorry for calling you out like that. I don't know what got into me."
Sakura looked back into his eyes. She studied him for a moment. "You're jealous. And scared."
The accusation was ridiculous. Ridiculously right on. Only she could shed his pride like that. His head fell. "Yeah."
At that, she pulled at his ear lightly. "You don't have to be."
"You were gonna marry him, Sakuchin."
"But I didn't."
He pinched her chin. "But you said yes when he asked you."
"And then I broke things off with him for you."
After a moment, he nodded slowly in hesitant agreement.
"Look, you don't have to worry. He hasn't contacted me at all. I doubt he will. And even if he did…I'd just tell him the truth. So… you can relax. I'm just wondering why he's back at all," she murmured, frowning. "I thought he permanently transferred to Osaka."
"You and me both." A little tired out, he sat on Sakura's couch. "In the middle of a good game too," he muttered with disdain. Then he scratched his head with both hands. "Ahhh, I hate drama. I'm allergic to drama. This is why I've stayed away from serious relationships my whole life."
Sakura disappeared for a moment. When she came back, she had a glass of water in her hand. Passing it to him, she sat beside him on the couch. "There's not gonna be any drama, okay? Kohei and I talked before he left. He understands why I broke things off."
He finished the glass and set it on the table. Resting his cheek against his knuckles, he glanced at her sideways, studying her pretty face. "When you see him again, you won't go back to him?"
At that, she leaned forward and kissed him. When she pulled back, she met his gaze and said, "What do you think?"
The charming, tilted half-smile appeared on his face then.
::::::
When Sakura walked into Clover, her senses were on alert. If Kohei was indeed back, then everyone would know and it would be the talk of the entire company. Of course, that would be the case if Kohei did show up in Clover. Straightening her lapels, she took in a deep breath and took the elevator up to her floor.
When the elevator doors opened, jet black hair and green eyes faced her. Her heart fell in dread. Making a decision in seconds, she stepped off the elevator with a smile plastered on her face and came to him.
"Kohei!"
Though he didn't return her smile, he came forward. "Sakura. I was just looking for you."
Her brain was panicking. Her heart too. Oh how to get out of this situation. "I thought you transferred to Osaka?"
"They sent me back."
Her eyes widened. "Why?" The question came out before she could filter it.
Hurt flashed acrossed his face briefly.
She shook her head quickly. "No, that's not what I meant. I mean, welcome back." When the people around stopped and watched the two of them, she grabbed his arm quickly and pulled him along to her office. "Let's talk in here."
Behind closed doors, she felt like she could breathe again. Oh this was more terrible than she had imagined. So he was back. And permanently. What was she going to do? Looking at him filled her with guilt and regret and what felt like every negative emotion a person could feel.
He stared at her back silently, waiting for her to turn around and face him.
When she did, there was that familiar defiance, alongside apology. Not bothering with putting up a front, Sakura let herself be herself. "Why are you back Kohei?"
"They sent me back," he repeated.
"Why?"
They stared at each other then, Kohei looking at her with sadness, Sakura looking back at him with guilt. For a while, it was like this, as if they were trying to understand how the other felt without words.
He didn't answer her question, but instead said, "How've you been?"
Her hands fisted. She wanted to give him a hug. Just to apologize. Just to say sorry. But it would be wrong now. It wouldn't be the right thing to do, for all parties. Since he didn't want to answer, she respected his silence. "I've been okay. Great, in fact."
"You're with Syaoran now?"
Guilty, her gaze dropped to the ground. "Mm."
"I saw him the other night. You probably know that. So you two… was that right after I left? Or…" Why was he bothering asking these questions, he thought to himself. Like shoving a dagger right through your own heart. "Forget it. It doesn't matter."
"I'm sorry…" She didn't even know what the apology was referring to.
After another minute of silence, he spoke. "I made that up."
Her head lifted up. "What?"
"They didn't send me back." He sent her a small, dry smile. "I just wanted to see your reaction."
She frowned, confused. "What?"
"I'm just here for the week." At that, he walked to the window and glanced out of the view. "My grandpa had a stroke a few days ago. He's in the hospital now, so I came back to take care of him."
The concern appeared immediately on her face. "Is he okay?"
"He'll be all right thankfully." He tapped the glass absently, then slid his hand into his pant pocket. Turning back to her, he said, "Truth is, I didn't want to come back here. Why would I want to see you happy with another guy?"
Sakura swallowed.
"Then my mom called about Grandpa's accident. It took me a day to make a decision, but eventually I figured out that family's more important than how I feel." When Sakura didn't say anything, he continued. "It's been half a year since I came back and it's been good for me to be away from you."
Another moment of silence. At a loss for words, she said, "I…don't know what to say."
"I didn't have to come and see you, I know. But then I bumped into Syaoran… realized it was inevitable that we'd cross paths somehow. So that's why I came here. This is it though. I won't be coming back. If you see me again, somewhere in the city, pretend you didn't see me. I'll do the same."
At that, she nodded. Tears were threatening to come out, but she swallowed them back with difficulty.
"I'll consider this the last time we see each other." At that, he began to walk to her door. When he opened it, he glanced back at her, smiled a sad smile, and said, "See ya."
"I'm sorry for everything, Kohei. Again. I do mean that."
He looked at her one last time, nodded as though to say he accepted it, and then he walked out of her office and perhaps her life for the last time. It was an odd feeling, a mix of relief and sadness and nostalgia. The first time she felt loved by a man was with him. He would always be a part of her memories, of who she was.
When her tears spilled over, she sat on her chair. Hurting someone as kind and respectful and understanding as Kohei left an ugly scar in her heart.
:::
At the end of the day, Sakura walked out of the elevator feeling emotionally exhausted. After that morning, co-workers started talking again about him and her and their failed wedding. Though six months had passed, people had unusually amazing memories of getting their invites and then suddenly hearing the cancellation of the wedding. Going back to the horror of it all made her want to bury herself in bed.
As she passed the building doors, the cold wind greeted her, and she wished miserably that Syaoran would show up. But she knew he was busy. He hadn't been picking her up for over a week now, doing too much overtime.
She let out a breath as she began to walk to the bus stop. After crying for several minutes that morning, she had had to give herself a pep-talk just to refocus on work. Emotionally exhausted indeed.
Absently she looked up. Her eyes caught a man walking towards her, maybe fifty metres away. Chestnut hair. Tall. Handsome face. From where she was, she could see his eyes light up. He brought a hand up to wave. And soon enough, that smile she loved appeared on his face.
She hurried her speed and met him halfway. When she threw herself on him easily, he chuckled and wrapped his arms around her. "Nice to see you too."
"I was hoping to see you tonight. And you showed up out of nowhere. Thank you."
He pulled her back slightly and studied her face. Stroking her cheek with his thumb, he said, "What happened?"
"Kohei came to visit me at the office."
He'd prepared for this, but it still put his back up to hear it. "Oh yeah?"
"It was harder than I expected, facing him again after all this time."
"So he's really back?"
She shook her head. "I'll tell you everything at dinner."
At that, he nodded and kissed her forehead. Then his arm came over her shoulders and they walked down to the busy part of the city.
A/N: What'd you think? =)