Shane found himself bearing more of Malik's weight as they walked through the desert night. The hours of walking were taking their toll. The young man was growing weaker and Shane knew if they did not get rescued soon, Malik would die.
Even the short rest they had taken after a few hours of hiking through the afternoon had done little to help his recovery. There was little water to go around and Shane had rationed it carefully; they had no idea if anyone had received their distress signal or where they might find water in the future.
As Salim moved in front, he kept muttering in Arabic. During the rest break, Salim had tried to argue that the water would go farther if shared only between two, not three. Shane knew Salim disagreed with the idea of bringing the injured man, but he was growing tired of hearing the scientist say it. And Malik certainly did not need to keep hearing that "he was going to die anyway."
Even if it was probably true.
Sighing, Shane continued walking. He stumbled as they moved from soft sand to harder, dry soil. He shook his head, wondering yet again why he had taken this mission. Because you were humiliated by Steve, uncomfortable around Kayla, and embarrassed by what you did to Kim. There was a life lesson in that, he thought. Never take an ISA mission just because your life sucks.
Oh, who was he kidding? He had made a career out of taking ISA missions to escape dealing with matters at home. When Emma died. When his parents died. When things got bad between him and Kim. The list went on and on.
That doesn't make it any less stupid.
No, it doesn't, he thought.
Next to him, Malik groaned. "Just a little farther," Shane lied. They still had a few hours of walking before he would let them stop, and then he would retrace their steps and, using one of those ridiculous ponchos, would try to wipe away any trace of their footprints.
In the back of his mind, Shane tried to ignore the nagging doubt that, even if their distress signal was heard, nobody would respond. Wasn't that part of the ISA way? Disavow the mission if an agent was captured. If the ISA decided that capture was inevitable, they might just cut their losses now.
Shane silently hoped Tarrington realized what a potential propaganda disaster it would be for alleged Western spies to be captured in Iraq. That was becoming Shane's biggest hope - that, as a political matter, the ISA could not abandon them.
"Just a little farther," Shane repeated, as he staggered under Malik's weight. "Just a little farther." That was becoming his mantra. With each step, he thought, just a little farther. Almost as if saying it enough would make it true.
He tried to focus on something else. Family. He tried to picture his children. Eve in Africa. That was pretty hard to picture, he admitted. How was she handling the culture-shock?
Andrew was easier to imagine. Was he still at Donovan Manor with Kim? If he was, he was probably riding his chestnut pony under Kim's watchful eye. She was smiling - a real smile that made her eyes glow - and he could picture the sunlight playing on her light-red hair.
Or maybe they had already returned to Salem. Shane could imagine everyone's shock at Steve's return, but that shock would quickly turn to joy. The Bradys would host a 'Welcome Home' party, with every member of the family in attendance. Shane would not be there, but he no longer counted as family.
Steve's family would rejoice. Shane could picture Jo and Jack. What would happen with Jo, he wondered. She had been sent to Bayview for killing Nick, because she believed he had caused Steve's death. Would finding out that Steve was alive speed her recovery or increase her guilt? Shane had no idea.
Jack would make Steve's return front-page news, but nobody would know the truth of how Steve actually returned. Shane's role would remain secret. In fact, if he died here in the desert, nobody would even think to connect Shane to Steve's return.
Up ahead, Salim seemed to be faltering. Shane looked up and was surprised at how far the moon had traveled while he had been thinking. Dawn was probably only a few hours away and they should find a defensible position in case they were spotted.
That thought was pretty laughable, Shane realized. What were they going to defend themselves with? Shane's two pistols had a total of 30 rounds in them. They would provide little defense if the three of them were found by a unit of the Republican Guard.
Shane tried to run through the possible actions he could take if that happened. Just in case, he told himself. It makes sense to consider the contingencies. He reminded himself that Ahmed Salim was the mission. Shane had to do everything possible to keep Salim alive long enough for Western forces to find him.
A plan formed in his mind. It was hardly appealing, but it was the only one he could think up at the moment. He asked Salim for the flashlight. They had avoided using it so far, because the beam of light might be seen for miles, but they had little choice now. Shane took the light and, trying to keep the beam low, began surveying the surrounding area for a suitable spot to make camp for the day. He spotted an outcropping of rocks in the distance.
That will have to do, he thought. Then he had another thought - a rather morbid one at that - but it seemed like one of the few positive aspects of his contingency plan. If Shane ever had to put his plan into effect, he would never have to worry about getting a lecture from Kim about his stupidity in taking this mission.
He would be dead long before she ever got a chance.