I know, I know, and I'm sorry. But here is another chapter.

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Lu xxx

(as a warning, there may be some trigger content in this chapter.)

Alec stared at the phone, then back at Izzy.

"Oh."

Izzy put her hands on her hips and just looked at him.

"Yes, oh. Would you please answer it so we don't have to put up with its incessant ringing?!"

"I will as soon as you leave the room, Iz."

She humphed and flipped her hair over her shoulder as she stalked out, her heels clacking against the wooden floor. Alec smiled slightly after her, watching as she pulled the door shut behind her. She had red talons today, tipped with what looked like metal but Alec knew was just clever polish. Honestly, he loved Izzy but she could be a little… strange sometimes. He swivelled his chair back to his desk, still rubbing his eyes to try and wake himself up, and picked up his phone. Not even bothering to see who was calling, he pressed the answer button and held it up to his ear.

"Hey, it's Alec."

"I know its Alec; I've been trying to reach you for ages!"

Alec rolled his eyes.

"Hello Magnus. Sorry – I was asleep. What d'you want?"

There was a sigh.

"Alec, it's half eleven. Why were you asleep?"

"Latin homework."

"Ah, I see the problem."

Alec laughed, just imagining the way Magnus would be nodding understandingly.

"Yeh well, what did you want to talk about?"

"Jace."

Alec hung up the phone. He was not talking about Jace with Magnus, he was done with him and he didn't want to think about him. But less than a few seconds later his phone went off again.

"Magnus, I am not talking about Jace, I am fed up with him!"

"Alec, just come over, please."

"Magnus…"

"Alec, just come over please."

"Okay. Fine. But I'm not happy about it."

He hung up for the second time, grabbing his jacket on the way out and rushing downstairs, his feet sending echoes all through the empty house. He stuck his head around the door to the lounge and saw Izzy and Max sat in their on the couch – Max watching some random cartoon and Izzy reading one of her silly magazines. He coughed and they both looked up at him.

"I have to go out now. I don't know how long I'm gonna be, but I've got my phone on me."

Max went back to the cartoons, but Izzy walked up to him by the door, the magazine dropping onto the carpet.

"Hey, where're you going? And what do we do about lunch?"

Alec sighed.

"I'm going over to Magnus's and you can sort out your own lunch, just don't make anything hot. I don't want to come home to the kitchen on fire again."

"Fine, I'll see you later then. Have fun."

"Yeh, unlikely."

Alec walked out of the front door, slamming it behind him as he left.

Jace was hiding in the bedroom, waiting to eavesdrop. He wanted to hear what Alec was going to say about him, because he wanted to understand, so he could fix things. He did honestly want to save their friendship, but he just didn't know how. Hopefully seeing the other perspective would help him to do that. Suddenly there was a buzzing and the sounds of footsteps. Jace's ears pricked up.

"Hey, Magnus."

"Alec, I need to know what is going on with you and Jace properly. What the hell happened the other day?"

"Well, he practically told me he was done with me, and that he was fed up, something like that. To be honest, I'm just fed up of feeling second class with him, the jocks always treating me like I'm not important. Him treating me like I wasn't important. I mean, I expect it from everyone else but Jace was supposed to be my best mate." He paused. "I guess it's my fault. I should have just let him get on with things, not prying into his business."

"Alec…"

"Magnus, just don't, okay."

"Alec, I'm sure he thinks of you as important."

"If he did then he wouldn't just shun me like that."

"Alec, you don't know what he is going through now…"

"No, because he wouldn't tell me! He just told me to keep my nose out when I was just concerned about him, caring about him! And you would know I suppose?"

"Yes."

"What?!"

"Alec you have to understand…"

"Understand what?"

"I let him stay here, he had nowhere else to go, and he was desperate."

"What do you mean he had nowhere else to go?"

Alec's voice had softened from the harsh tones. He almost sounded guilty.

"He was lying on the floor outside; he looked like he was having a breakdown…"

"Oh god, this is my entire fault, I shouldn't have just snapped like that, he should have been able to stay with me, it shouldn't have…"

"Alec, he said that you didn't deserve to have to put up with him, I'm sure it wasn't your fault…"

"It was Magnus, it was, oh shit shit shit shit…"

Jace couldn't bear it a moment longer. He smashed open the door, swinging himself towards the two figures. Alec was sat on the couch, his head in his hands and looking awful and Magnus was stood up flustering. He made his way over.

"Alec, it wasn't your fault. It was mine for being arrogant, for pushing you away, for not valuing you. Okay? Just don't blame yourself, please, just don't. I was stupid. Of course you weren't sticking your nose in, and for god's sake Alec you are the most important person in this world to me."

Alec snapped his head up, his eyes widening in panic as he saw Jace. He paled visibly when he saw the cast on Jace's leg, the bruises clearly visible now that he was wearing a short sleeved tshirt. He must have looked a right state. He edged towards where Alec was sat perfectly still.

"Alec…"

"Jace, what happened?"

He said it very, very quietly, so that Jace only just heard.

"Dad…he…"

Alec blanched totally.

"Oh my God…"

"Alec…"

"Jace, I am so sorry, I…I shouldn't have shouted at you because you didn't want me to know, I should have just stayed with you, I am so sorry…"

Alec got up quickly and ran out of the door, shaking visibly as he yanked the door open, tripping over his feet as he ran out. Magnus looked terrified.

"Jace, I have to go after him, I'm sorry, okay, um, I'll be back as soon as I can but…"

Jace nodded.

"It's fine, just go."

And he rushed out, leaving Jace totally alone.

"Hello?"

"Hey Iz, its Simon."

"Why hello."

"Um, are you doing anything?"

"I'm sort of having to look after Max, but other than that no."

"Oh, okay. Would it be alright if I came over? There is someone I want you to meet."

"Simon…"

"God, Iz, not like that. I've… just found out a couple of things. Well, a couple of people actually. It's kind of complicated."

"Hmm?"

"Basically my dad turned up and we are gonna go live with him because Mom is dead so he gets full custody."

He said it all very fast and without breathing.

"Wait, your dad showed up?"

"Yep, and he's actually pretty cool."

"Really?"

"Yeah, and so is my brother."

"Wait, you have a brother as well? What?"

"A twin, actually. Jon."

"Right, that's definitely not confusing."

"I did say that it was complicated. So, can we come over?"

"Um, yeah, sure, how long are you gonna be, d'you reckon?"

"About fifteen minutes, okay?"

"Sure. See ya."

"Bye."

Fifteen minutes later Simon was knocking on the front door of the Lightwood's – well, supposedly house, but obviously mansion – with Jon right behind him, wringing his hands together and waiting nervously. He had been reluctant to come, but Simon had wanted him to meet everyone before he got to school, so that he didn't feel so out of place, and Jon, seeing the logic, had agreed. He had been excited to meet everyone, but Simon guessed that he just was anxious to make the right impression.

The door was opened by a small kid with messy black hair and glasses, a book dangling from his hand and an iron man tshirt on. He looked nervously up at them, pushing the glasses slightly further back onto his nose, his left hand still fixed on the doorknob.

"Who are you?"

He said.

"I'm Simon. I'm Izzy's boyfriend. This is my brother Jonathan."

He smiled at them.

"I'm Max."

"Oh, are you Izzy's famous younger brother?"

He nodded enthusiastically.

"Does she talk about me a lot?"

"Oh, all the time. Hey, I heard you liked Manga. Would you like to borrow some? I have loads back at my house."

"Cool!"

Just then Izzy appeared running down the hallway with bare feet and her hair quickly shoved back in a pony tail, in a simple pair of jeans and a black tank top – it was clear she hadn't planned to do anything. She smiled when she saw Simon, and beamed when she saw that Max was chatting enthusiastically to him about one particular comic he was reading. She rushed up to her little brother and hugged him from behind, and he giggled, squirming around in her arms.

"Heya Max, what's up?"

"Izzy, Simon's gonna lend me some of his Manga!"

"Oh that's nice of him! Hey, why don't you go and watch TV for a bit whilst I talk to Simon and Jonathan, yeah?"

Max nodded and ran off.

"He's so cute, isn't he?"

Simon laughed.

"Yep. Hey, Iz, this is Jon, my brother."

Izzy looked past him to where Jon was stood awkwardly, on hand on his elbow. He raised a hand equally awkwardly to her as she stood shocked.

"Hey."

"Hi. I'm Izzy."

"Jonathan. According to Simon, you're the perfect person."

"Oh?"

"Damn right. And to be honest I can see why."

"Hey, hand off!"

Simon said playfully, smiling at Izzy in a dazed manner.

"Apparently, you are also pretty smart, and pretty cool, as well as just pretty."

"He really said that?"

She looked touched. She smiled fondly at Simon.

"Absolutely."

Replied Jonathan.

"Hey, why don't you two come in, have a coffee, and maybe help me make cupcakes for my brother when he gets home."

"Max?"

"No, Alec, he's been feeling a bit rough recently – I think – he loves cupcakes, even though he will never admit it, and… I'm pretty atrocious at cooking and I doubt he would be pleased if I made of the kitchen again today."

"Again?"

Said Simon, not fazed by the idea of making cupcakes.

"Yeah, the scorch marks on the ceiling are kinda from where I made pancakes this morning."

"Woah."

Simon and Jonathan both said at once.

"So, are you two in?"

"Of course."

Said Simon.

"Why not? What could possibly happen?"

Said Jonathan. Famous last words.

"Hey Clary. What's up?"

"Simon, where are you? It's just Dad said that you and Jonathan were out, and I just… wanted to get out and do something, you know? Socialise. Stop moping about."

"Oh, we're at Izzy's…"

"Can I come over too?"

"Well, I wouldn't mind, I'll just check with Izzy – hey, Iz , is it okay if Clary comes over? She's ace at cupcakes."

"Sure."

"Yep, you can come over. See you in a bit."

"Thanks Simon. See you soon. Love you."

"Love you too."

Alec was running. He should have stayed with Jace, shouldn't have run off when he had shouted, he should have realised that he was stressed and upset and not just judged Jace straight away. He shouldn't have been such a selfish fool. And now Jace was having to stay with Magnus of all people, alone, he had been in hospital presumably alone and goodness knows what had happened to make him leave home, he'd had a flipping breakdown on the pavement, he'd been stranded alone, he'd probably been distraught, confused, terrified, and Alec just couldn't process it anymore. He had done this, this was his entire fault, how could he have been so stupid, how could he have been so bloody selfish? How could he have done this?

He ran in through his door, slamming it behind him angrily, rushing past the kitchen door. Five voices were laughing in the kitchen.

"Max, give Clary back that spatula!"

"No!"

"Oh come on Max!"

"Hey, if you don't give it back I won't lend you that Manga!"

"Max, I think he is serious."

"Fine."

Alec looked at the closed door and punched it in frustration, knocking a hole in it. The voices stopped abruptly and he ran upstairs, tears starting to fall down his face, a few splinters lodged in his still clenched fist. He heard the door open and slam shut again and someone burst in, shouting something, someone shouting back, but he couldn't hear what they were saying, it had all gone fuzzy. He slammed into his room just as someone else came through the front door, and ran into the connected ensuite, locking the door behind him and leaning against it, panting.

And then there were voices on the other side, calling out to him, asking for him to stop whatever he was doing. He recognised Magnus, and Izzy, and someone else was there as well, trying to calm down Izzy. She sounded hysterical.

Then they all hushed down and just Magnus spoke.

"Alec, are you okay?"

He didn't answer. Of course he wasn't fucking okay. How could he ever be okay?

Clary stopped in her tracks as she saw the person hobbling through the front door of the Lightwood's house.

"Jace?"

"Clary?"

"Jace, can we please talk about what happened?"

"Clary, look I'm sorry, but this is a really bad time!"

"Jace, please!"

"Look, I'm sorry, but I have just been confused, torn up, everything has been crazy. I kept seeing you through my window, and thinking how perfect you were, and then when we were standing on the pavement, I just – lost control a bit, I guess. And then I was scared."

"Scared of what?"

"Scared of hurting you."

"I've seen you too. You're real popular at school. I guess I liked you when I saw you, and I was going to go speak to you that day when you collapsed, when you collapsed." She giggled slightly. "I couldn't let you go alone. And like I said, I think I might like you. I guess it's just been a bit crazy for the both of us, huh?"

"Yep. So… d'you fancy giving us a go?"

"Sure. Now, go see to Alec. That is why you're here, isn't it?"

"Yeah… see you later."

"And you."

"Alec, please."

Alec brought the knife down on his arm, letting the blood flow freely down the limb, caking it and staining it red. As each drop of blood fell another tear ran tracks down his cheek. He brought the knife down again, this time just a tad deeper, a tad faster, a tad harder, and the emotions rose high once more, spilling out of him and spilling into him through the open wound. It was awful, everything was awful, everything was swirling and fatal and black and undoable, he couldn't cope and he didn't want to anymore, not anymore, not in that moment, so he didn't.

"Alec, please, open the door, let me in."

Jace had arrived now, knocking on the door. He sounded desperate.

"None of this is your fault!"

"It is!"

He sobbed, losing it entirely all over again.

"It all is!"

He heard Izzy start to scream hysterically, and someone whisper into her ear.

"Come on Izzy, come away, you're just going to get even more distressed…"

"No!"

She wailed. There was the sound of someone picking her up and taking her from the room. She didn't appear to be putting up much of a fight.

"Max come back! Jonathan, grab him! Sorry, Jace, I tried to keep him back."

"It's okay Clary, just take him to his room, third on the right, and stay there with Jonathan, okay?"

"Sure."

"Alec!"

His little brother called out for him in fear as he was dragged out by someone, presumably the mysterious Jonathan.

Another cut, getting dangerously deep.

"Alec, it's just me and Jace now, please let us in. Please. Alec."

Alec looked down at his arm, which was now laddered with lots of dangerous looking wounds. He was scaring the hell out of himself now. He didn't particularly care, but he was. He slumped further against the door, letting the knife fall to the tiled floor with a clatter. It was now covered in blood, and it took everything he had not to faint – his vision and thoughts were already becoming a little hazy.

"Alec, what are you doing in there?!"

It was Jace, his voice rising dramatically.

He reached up and slid the lock back, shifting away from the door to the wall on the other side, so he wouldn't be hit if it opened suddenly. He did it so quietly that no one on the other side would notice. Then he felt the consciousness start to drift from him.

"It's…open…"

He whispered, as the darkness overtook him.

"It's…open…"

Magnus crashed inside… and froze. Alec was lying there in a pool of growing blood spilling from his arms, which was littered in new and very deep wounds. He rushed forward, chucking off of his jacket and tearing strips of it off. As he was binding the cuts as best as he could he turned around to see Jace stood there shaking and very, very white. He looked the sort of lost you were when someone you loved deeply died. Well, Alec wasn't far off.

"Jace, call an ambulance. Now!"

He snapped into action, pulling out his phone and dialling 911 as fast as he could.

Magnus turned back to the passed out boy, stroking his face gently.

"Come back, Alec."

And he kissed him.

Soooo? What do you think?