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I assume it's morning now because Sebastian always comes in the morning to whip us.
So there he is pulling Simon out of his cell with one hand and in his other hand is the black whip.
It sucks worse for me and Izzy because we can feel each other's pain, oh and Jace and Alec.
After he got done whipping all of us he walks away.
Ten minutes later the demons bring us out breakfast every morning; stale crackers and old cheese.
I force myself to eat the crackers and gulp down a big drink of water.
After Magnus told everyone about me throwing up the blood, they went quiet. No one has talked since.
I hear foot steps and feel myself whimper because I know what's coming.
He only comes through twice a day. First is to whip us and second is to use me. He takes me to the room and rapes me.
I feel like a beaten, pathetic sex slave.
When he reaches to my cell I avoid looking at him. I put my head down in my knees and brace myself.
I hear him open the cell door. I wait but instead I hear manacles being removed. But not mine.
I look up at him and see he's pulling Izzy up by her arm. She pulls her arm out of his grip.
"Don't you dare touch me," Isabelle hisses.
"What are you doing? Why are you taking Isabelle?" I hear Simon ask.
Sebastian turns to Simon and grins.
"I'm just going to borrow your girlfriend for awhile," he begins.
Then turns and looks at me.
"And don't you all think Clary needs a break for one day?" He asks and looks back at Simon.
"I swear on the angle if you don't let her go I'm going to kill you, slowly," I hear Alec hiss.
I hear Sebastian laugh and start to walk down the hall.
I can't let this happen. I can't let Sebastian do to Izzy what he did to me.
I stand up and wince at the bruises on my sides.
"Sebastian wait," I say weakly.
"What do you want?" I hear him say. He stops and turns to look at me.
"Don't hurt her," I say.
He laughs and asks, "Why would I do that?"
"Because... ," I start to say.
Am I really going to say what I think I'm going to say? Yes I am, for Izzy.
Sebastian makes a irritated sound and starts to walk away.
I swallow and feel my throat dry as sand. I take a deep breath.
"Because I will do anything, if you leave her alone," I say, my voice cracking.
"No clary," I hear my mom sob.
"No! Don't give this bastard anything he wants Clary," I hear Iz say.
"Leave them both alone!" Simon says, furious.
"Clary, don't," I hear Jace say to me quietly.
I don't dare to look at any of them.
I see Sebastian start to walk back to me.
He stops in front of my cell and looks at me. Isabelle struggles to get out of Sebastian's hold.
"Anything?" He asks.
I feel a tear slide down my cheek.
"Anything," I hear my voice crack.
"NO! Clary no! Let me go you sick bastard," Izzy yells.
She finally gets out of his grip and kicks him in the face. Sebastian stumbles back and puts his hand to his nose. Blood starts to flow out of his hands.
Before Sebastian can make a move Isabelle punches him twice and kicks him again.
Sebastian gets up and looks at her. If looks could kill, Izzy would of been dead.
She goes to kick him but he catches her leg and pulls. She falls to the floor and Sebastian gets on top of her. He puts his head on one side of her head and says something to low for me to hear because he's far away and because everyone's yelling.
She turns white as paper and doesn't do anything.
Sebastian gets up and pulls Isabelle by her hair up. She doesn't fight back, she lets him do this.
What did he say to her?
"You son of a bitch," I hear Alec say and try to get out of his manacles.
Sebastian throws Izzy in her cell and puts her manacles back on her.
He looks at me and grins.
"I'll be right back. Just let me fix this," he touches his bloody nose.
He closes my cell and walks away.
I sit down and just sit there.
I feel tears spilling down my cheeks. I wipe my face.
Everyone is talking but all I can hear is a ringing noise.
I wait for Sebastian.
A few minutes later he walks into my cell and grabs me.
I don't struggle, I listen to what Sebastian's says. I walk behind him down the hall.
I follow Sebastian into the room.
When we get into the room I stand in the middle of the room while Sebastian locks the door behind him.
"I wanna make a little deal with you, little sis," I hear him say sounding amused.
I look at him but don't say anything.
"I will let your friends go and you but you must swear to meet me every Friday, Saturday, and Wednesday. You must to whatever I say and do whatever I want. You can't let anyone know your meeting me. If you do you will be punished. If anyone try's to track me you'll be punished. If you ever try to leave and not come back, you'll be punished bad. Way worse than I already have. So do we have a deal?" He asks.
He's really going to let us go? Just like that?
I don't answer him I just ask, "Why are you letting us free?"
He walks in front of me and crosses his arms over his chest.
"The clave has been trying to track all you guys down and they still are. I thought by now they would of given up, but they haven't. If I don't give you guys back, then sooner or later they will find me," he says.
Of course. I should have known. I thought by now they would have given up on us.
"So do we have a deal," Sebastian asks and grins.
I swallow hard.
"So you swear you will leave everyone alone?" I ask
"Only if you follow everything I tell you to do," he says.
"And you won't hurt my baby either," I say and put my hand on my little bump on my stomach.
His expression changes. He looks irritated and a little mad.
"No I won't," Sebastian says impatiently.
I take a deep breath and say, "Fine. It's a deal".
"If you ever break this deal, you will regret it," he says and I just nod.
"Wait, where do I meet you?" I ask feeling my voice crack again.
"You'll find out soon enough," he says.
"Now let's work on a part of our deal," he grins and walks up to me.
What does he mean?
Oh.
He kisses me and I just stand there. He pulls back and says, "You have to participate".
He kisses me on my lips again. This time I kiss him back.
Bile starts to rise back in my throat. I. Force myself not to throw up.
Memories start to flash in my mind.
Me and Sebastian were back in Idris kissing.
I pushed that memory away and try to think of something else.
I just realized he's pulling me to the bed in the room.
He pushes me softly onto the bed and gets on top of me.
He starts to kiss and nibble on my neck. I shiver.
He takes off his shirt and looks at me.
I wait there and know what he wants.
I pull my shirt over my head and lay back down on the bed.
He smiles and looks at my body.
This is the first time he really gets a look at me without struggling.
He takes the sweats off me that he gave me earlier. He takes off his jeans.
Now we're both half naked.
He unclasp my bra that he gave me and throws it onto the floor. I close my eyes and let him look at me.
Why does this have to happen to me?
He moves the panties that he also gave me down my legs and onto the floor. He then takes off his boxers.
I let hold my breath because I know what's going to happen next. I feel a tear go down my cheek.
He grabs my leg and puts it over his waist. He did it to the right leg to. I look into his eyes for the first time. He has lust in his eyes but it also looks like he has something else in his eyes. Nothing I saw before.
I look away.
The whole time I felt disgusted.
Sebastian gets up and gets dressed. I do the same.
I can't believe I just did that. I just had sex with my own blooded brother. I'm so disgusting.
We walk out the room and toward the cells.
I put my head down and feel so ashamed. No one will never want me again. Jace will hate me. What will my mom think?
We get to the cells and Sebastian unlocks them.
I can feel eyes on me but I keep my head down.
He unlocks everyone's manacles.
Everyone stays standing in there cells. Sebastian walks out.
"What's going on?" I hear Luke ask.
"Well me and Clary made a little deal," he says looking very happy.
Isabelle and Jace walk out the cell.
Then they both say at the same time, "What kind of deal".
Sebastian smirks.
"You guys are all free, including Clarissa, to leave this second. But you can not look for me and I am forgiven-" he was cut off by Jace.
"You'll never be forgiven for anything you've done," he hisses.
"I will never stop trying to kill you. After what you've done," Simon says.
"Well if you want to stay here and try to kill me, then I guess we can keep things how they are," Sebastian says and stands behind me. He tilts my neck and kisses my neck.
No this can't be happening! Not in front of everyone. I should move away but if I do then our deal will be broken.
I stay there motionless, feeling a few tears sliding down my cheeks.
"And don't tell me Clary just did what she never wanted to do for no reason," he says and I can feel him smile against my skin.
"Don't touch her," I hear Jace say.
"Then do we have a deal," he asks.
For the first time I open my eyes and look write into Jace's eyes. He is staring into my eyes.
'Please' I mouth and I feel another tear slide down my cheek.
We lock eyes for a few moments then Jace says, "Fine. We won't look for you if you leave ALL of us alone."
"Fantastic," Sebastian says.
Sebastian turns around and says, "Follow me".
I turn around and follow him before I know if the others are doing the same. I stay right behind Sebastian so I don't have to be by anyone else.
We turn to the right and there's a portal on the wall.
"There you go," Sebastian says.
"So your just going to let us go? Just like that?," Alec asks.
"I'm sick and tired of all you. And Clarissa already gave me what I wanted," he says and smiles.
I shiver and step to the side to let everyone go.
They don't go.
"Clary goes first," Magnus says.
"No, she goes last. How do I know right when she leaves you won't try to kill me?" Sebastian says.
They don't move.
I finally speak up and say, "Please just go. I'll be right behind you guys".
They hesitate.
"Please," I say again.
They all wait but go through the portal.
Jace is the last one. He turns around and says, "If Clary isn't there one second later I am, I'm going to hunt you down and rip out your eyes and cut off your limbs. Oh and you'll never be forgiven," he jumped into the portal.
My turn.
I start to walk but Sebastian grabs my arm. I flinch.
I turn around.
"Remember no one can find out and you better not break are deal. I will hurt you bad," he says.
I nod and he lets go of my arm.
I jump through the portal.
As I go through I hear Sebastian say, "I'll see you soon, little sister".
As soon I get to the Institute I get up off my hands and knees.
I look around me and see everyone getting up and asking everyone if there alright. Then I start to move out of the training room.
I feel someone grab my arm. I flinch and see its Jace behind me.
"Clary-," he started but I cut him off.
"Let go of me," I say and try to tug my arm out of his grip.
I start thinking of Sebastian, how he used to hold on like this.
"Clary I just-," he starts again but I cut him off again.
"Please Jace. Let me go," I beg and he lets go.
I feel tears in my eyes.
I can't be here. I can't be with these people. I have made their life a living hell. Are they ever going to forgive me? Probably not. They don't deserve a pathetic and disgusted person in their life.
I limp to my room as fast as I can.
As soon as I get into my room, I shut my door.
I slide down the door and start sobbing.
I cry and cry and cry and cry and cry until I pass out.