Chapter Ten
"What happens when I go to school?" Caroline asked Stefan who seemed to walk over to her side that sat on the couch. Her eyes seemed to dance on the blood bag that he held in his hands and Caroline had to mentally prepare herself to drink slowly out of it. If she wanted to learn how to control her thirst, she had to be comfortable with stopping her urges. She needed control. But the way Stefan had been practicing with her for the past two days, she knew she was progressing with it all. She had control. She did, she had control and that thought just made her smile.
"I'll be there," Stefan started, "I'll be there and you'll control yourself. You've got to control your thirst when hundreds of high schoolers roam the halls."
Caroline nodded. "You've been doing this for how long?" she asked, grinning at the blonde man who seemed to sit next to her on the couch. She took in a deep breath when he seemed to hand over the blood bag. Taking hold of it, Caroline popped at the pipe before slowly bringing it to her lips.
Stefan chuckled softly, "It's been a while."
He watched as the blonde put the pipe in his mouth, sipping slowly at the blood before hesitantly pulling it away from her mouth again. She repeated the same process slowly and effectively. He was even surprised when she seemed to keep up a conversation with the blood bag in her hand. Stefan was proud of his blonde friend. He knew she was going to be just fine.
"How's the training going with Damon?" Stefan asked casually, slumping further onto the couch before eyeing the blonde who seemed to take the last sip of the now empty bag. He remembered the night a drunken Damon had admitted his feelings towards the blonde and Stefan couldn't help but feel curious over how the two were doing. His brows furrowed when Caroline seemed to tense at the mention of his older brother's name and Stefan knew things weren't right.
"Do I really need to train?" Caroline asked, "I mean—it's not like I'm ever going to be in a vampire showdown where we fight to survive."
Stefan grinned at that. He was starting to love the blonde's company more and more. Shrugging, he explained, "It's always better to be strong and know what you're doing." Sighing, Stefan got up from the couch, "You never do know what could happen."
Caroline let out a huge breath of air before slouching at her shoulders. Looking back at the blonde man that seemed to be smiling warmly down at her, her brows furrowed. "What?" she asked. Clearly not understanding why the man was looking down at her so intensely.
"You're going to make a great vampire Caroline," he started, smiling, "Showdown or not, I'm proud of you."
Caroline smiled at that. He was proud of her. Just that phrase made everything okay. Everything was okay. She was okay and she was going to be perfectly fine. Stefan was proud of her and that's all she wanted. She never wanted to let him down. She wasn't going to let her down.
"Thanks for helping me Stefan," Caroline stated, getting up from the couch as well before walking closer towards him. His brows seemed to furrow when she neared him further and Caroline smiled warmly at him before wrapping her arms around her friend.
"Thank you," she stated at his shoulder.
Chuckling, Stefan nodded before hugging the blonde back.
She was going to be fine.
Caroline made her way deeper into the forest, her eyes grazing over the grass underneath her and she smiled at the scent of the woods. Its smell seemed to be heightened because of the little droplets of soft rain that seemed to be pouring from above her. Smiling further at the sun that hit at her eyes, Caroline was glad she was able to walk on the outside again. She loved this. She could feel everything.
Stepping over the last tree root, Caroline looked over the small cleared area she had visited yesterday as well. It seemed to be a little muddier than yesterday and Caroline chucked that out to the rain that was falling at the moment. Eyes wandering to Damon who stood in the middle of it all, she tried to study his expression but got nothing when he simply stared at her form that seemed to near him further.
"What took you so long?"
Caroline's eyes narrowed at the annoyed tone coming from the man. Brushing it off, Caroline was in too much of a good mood to allow Damon get to her today. "I was with Stefan," Caroline answered, "I'm kind of new to the whole drinking blood ordeal, so he was helping me with it."
"How'd you do?" Damon asked, twirling a branch in his hand as he eyed the woman before him. He watched as she avoided him before walking over to the nearest tree and slumping down on the side of it. She seemed to sit against it and Damon's brow arched. "What do you think you're doing?" he asked, annoyed and yet slightly curious.
She simply ignored him again and Damon's eyes narrowed at the blonde that seemed to be eyeing the mud below her, her fingers playing together nervously. His brows furrowed at her form. "What's wrong?" he asked. His voice was surprisingly soft as he moved closer towards her. She seemed to look up at him and Damon composed himself, his eyes cold once again.
"Nothing," she stated before looking back away from him, her eyes grazing over the cloudy sky above them.
"If you don't want to train today just tell me, I've got better things to do than just wait around for you all day," Damon muttered before throwing the stick at the muddy ground beside him. "I honestly don't see what Stefan sees in you," he started harshly, "I mean, you can't survive this."
"You're—well—you," Damon began, "I mean, there's a reason why I chose you when you were human. You were just so easy to push around and manipulate. It was almost fun."
"Really fun actually," Damon corrected, grinning at the blonde who seemed to direct her eyes away from him. "It was easy too. That's why I keep telling Stefan that the insecure blonde just isn't going to survive this," he started, "Why not just kill you ourselves instead of waiting it out until you do something stupid to kill yourself off?"
Caroline's eyes shot up at him when he spoke. She could feel every part of her wanting to break down. "Why…why do you hate me so much?" she asked. Her voice was broken. She could feel her eyes starting to burn and the sudden urge to feed erupting within her. She knew she was going to cry. She was going to cry. Here she was thinking that nothing could ruin her day and then Damon simply seemed to break her apart again.
Damon's eyes met the blonde's. Her words cut through him like glass. To make matters worse, the sight of her eyes starting to glisten, Damon could see she was about to cry. Shit.
Caroline knew she was going to break any minute now. Trying her hardest to blink away the tears, Caroline let out a shaky breath when the attempt failed and her eyes started to water further. One thing was for sure, she wasn't going to cry in front of him. She wasn't going to give him the satisfaction. She wasn't.
"I-I got to go," Caroline stated quickly, wiping at her cheeks quickly before getting up from the ground. "I'm sorry for wasting your time," she finished softly.
Damon's body softened instantly at that. His eyes weren't cold anymore; they were soft and surprisingly concerned. He watched in awe as the blonde tried wiping at her cheeks again but he could see that she was crying. What did I do?
Not even daring in looking over at Damon, Caroline wiped at her cheeks again before practically running away from where she stood. She wasn't going to cry in front of him. She ran and ran and ran. She could feel more tears start to flood at her eyes and she hated the fact that it blurred the trees and grass in front of her. Sniffling slightly, Caroline tried her best in trying to calm herself. She needed to calm down.
"Blondie wait!" Damon exclaimed from behind the blonde, his jogging turning into running when Caroline seemed to simply increase her speed when his voice ringed through the quiet forest.
He could hear her crying form where he ran and Damon cursed under his breath before instantly using his vampire speed to near her further.
Caroline tried wiping at her tear stained cheeks, her eyes were burning and she could feel herself starting to lose her control. Eyes wandering to the boarding house not so far away from her, Caroline's eyes spotted Elena's tiny form making her way closer to the front door. Caroline could hear the woman's pulse from where she stood and she couldn't help but let more tears escape her eyes at the sudden urge resurface. She wanted the blood so bad, so fucking bad. Practically shaking in tears now, Caroline tore her eyes away from Elena before leaning again the tree behind her again. Sliding down it, Caroline held herself tightly, her head at her knees when trying to calm herself down. She had to control it and she had to stop crying.
Her tears were starting to stain her jeans but Caroline didn't care, she had to get in control of herself. Letting out shaky breaths, Caroline breathed in and then out. In and out, in and out, she breathed. She could feel her face starting to change back to normal again, the thirst fading. She sighed before trying to get in hold of her tears again. Holding herself tighter, Caroline took a few more shaky breaths, she had to do this for herself. She had to be strong for herself. If she was going to survive this, she had to believe in herself. She did, she believed in herself and that was all that mattered.
She could hear him walk closer to her and Caroline's hands simply tightened around her legs, her face burying further into her arms. She wasn't going to look at him. She wasn't going to let him break her again. She was strong. She was strong.
Damon's eyes softened further at the trembling blonde. She seemed to get tenser when he stepped a little closer to her, now a few feet away from her, Damon slowly slumped onto the ground too, watching as she slowly tried to get a hold of herself again. He watched as she mended herself. Her words were clear in his head the whole time he watched her. She thought he hated her. He was cruel to her and she found it within herself to think that he hated the very sight of her. This thought caused an ache to erupt at his chest, his head pounding at his skull.
"Caroline?" he called out softly, watching as the blonde ignored him and let out another shaky breath.
Pursing his lips together, Damon slowly got up from the ground before hesitantly stepping in closer to her. She continued to cry into her arms, not daring to look at him. Slowly crouching down in front of her, Damon eyed her form softly before calling out for her again, "Caroline?"
He listened to her let out another breath of air before letting her hands leave her legs. She seemed to wipe at her cheeks again before getting up from the ground in a swift movement. She didn't dare look at Damon who was still at the ground when starting to walk away from him, her hands flying to her cheeks when she seemed to wipe at them again.
Damon's jaw clenched hard before he get up from the ground. Letting his eyes find the woman that was already nearing the boarding house before them, Damon slowly allowed himself to follow behind her.
Caroline opened at the front door of the boarding house. She could feel his shoes near the door as well and Caroline sighed before wiping at her cheeks one last time before walking into the house. Hesitantly walking towards the direction of voices, Caroline slowly made her way into the room to face Elena and Stefan. She smiled faintly at them when they both seemed to look over at her right away.
"Caroline," Elena breathed out, a smile bracing her lips before she slowly made her way towards her friend.
Caroline watched Elena near her, glancing over at Stefan who seemed to nod at her, Caroline sighed before focusing on hugging her best friend. She was going to hug her friend and everything was going to be okay. She was going to okay.
Wrapping her hands around Elena, Caroline smiled at the fact that she seemed to control herself as her mind was fixated on just being held for a moment by someone who cared about her. Sighing at Elena's shoulder, Caroline smiled again when Elena seemed to squeeze her form in reassurance before finally pulling away from her.
"How are you feeling?" Elena asked, her eyes searching Caroline's features in pure concern. Caroline smiled at her worried form. "Better," Caroline started, "I feel like I might actually get a better hold on the urge of feeding."
"But I couldn't do it without Stefan," Caroline stated, looking over at Stefan who seemed to smile at her. Caroline smiled back at him.
Everything was okay.
She watched as Elena's attention went behind her and Caroline knew she was eyeing the new person who seemed to slowly enter the room as well. Not even giving him another glance, Caroline watched Elena eye his moving form that seemed to stand a few feet away from Stefan. She could feel his eyes piercing through her and yet she didn't look back at him.
"What about training with Damon?" Elena asked before looking back at Caroline.
Caroline tensed. Lips parting, it took a while for Caroline to voice something out. "I'm trying my best," she stated softly, forcefully smiling at Elena before glancing at Stefan who seemed to twitch awkwardly. She knew the blonde man could see right through her. He knew something had just happened, and yet Elena didn't pick up much on it.
Damon's eyes softened at her words. She was trying her best. She was still new at all of this and for the last two days he had been nothing but a complete asshole. He would just repeatedly remind her that she was never going to make it as a vampire but here she was trying. She was trying and he was bringing her down over and over again. He was cruel to her and the sight of her crying just a moment ago was earth shattering. He didn't know why it affected him so much but he surprisingly wanted to apologize to her again. He wanted her to just look at her but she didn't even seem to do that.
"I should go clean up," Caroline started, looking down at her dirtied clothing, "I'm a mess."
Elena smiled at her friend before nodding at her. Hugging at Caroline again, Caroline sighed before completely pulling away and walking towards the staircase again. Slowly making her way upstairs, Caroline closed the door to her room before allowing her forehead to rest against it. She took control of her breathing again.
She was fine.
Caroline's eyes danced at the night sky before her. Smiling faintly, Caroline looked away from the balcony's view when a knock erupted at the bedroom door. Grinning, Caroline used her vampire speed to rush over to the door and open at it quickly. "This super speed thing is kind of cool to be honest," Caroline stated grinning before letting her attention be brought to the man on the other side of the door.
Caroline's grin faltered instantly at the man that she had mistaken for Stefan. She watched as he arched his arm forward to reveal a blood bag. Her brows furrowed at the sight of it before she looked back at Damon who seemed to be smiling softly at her.
"You're going to school tomorrow," he started, "I suggest you drink it."
Damon watched as the blonde tore her eyes away from him before she shook her head at him, stepping back from him and the blood. His eyes softened and his jaw clenched. "It's better than drinking out from some kid's body," Damon urged again, stepping closer into the blonde only to have her step back again, she shook her head too.
Damon sighed. He didn't know why this was so hard for him, but he tried anyway. "About today..." Damon seemed to trail off, his eyes meeting the blonde's when she seemed to finally meet his gaze again. Her eyes were soft and Damon's stomach fluttered. About to continue, Damon stopped when Caroline seemed to slowly take hold of the blood bag in his hand. Looking back up at her, Damon grinned when she seemed to take out the tube to drink from.
"You said you had your urges in control right?" He asked amused.
Caroline simply watched him as he took another step closer to her, she took one back. His eyes were soft when they eyed her form before he stepped into her again. She stepped back. "Let's see it," he stated softly, smiling reassuringly at Caroline when she seemed to shoot her eyes in his direction.
Caroline licked at her lips quickly before slowly sipping from the bag. Taking the tube from herself a moment after, Caroline licked at her lips again before passing the full bag back to Damon. She barely met his eyes that seemed to be studying her every move.
Damon's eyes widened slightly at her ability of control. Taking hold of the blood bag, Damon slowly took a sip from it himself before looking back at the blonde that seemed to have the softest expression on her face.
"Looks like you're stronger than I thought," Damon stated softly before taking another step closer to her, only to have her take one back again. He grinned softly before placing the full blood bag onto the bed side table.
"Have you got your compulsion down?" He asked the blonde who seemed to slowly shake her head at him. Grinning at her, Damon nodded, "It's alright. We'll get there."
Caroline brow arched at that. What was he even doing here? He barely visited her room and rarely did he ever try to teach or help her take control of her abilities and urges on his own time. He would only ever help her when Stefan was to force him to. "What do you want?" Caroline asked softly, her eyes hesitantly meeting his.
To apologize, Damon thought to himself before clenching at his jaw. "Nothing," Damon stated, stepping in closer to the blonde and sighing when she stepped back again. "I just figured you'd want some help training a bit more before you went to school," Damon finished.
"I don't need your help," Caroline stated. Her voice was flat and Damon's eyes narrowed at her expression. "You don't have to waste your time with me," Caroline stated softly now, "I've talked to Stefan and he's going to be training me so you don't have torture yourself any longer."
Damon's eyebrows arched at that. "So you fired me?" He asked amused, his expression softening slightly when realizing that the blonde thought that he felt tortured or forced when helping her.
He watched as the blonde tensed further and Damon unknowingly took a step forward once again, only to have her take another huge in back, her legs hitting the edge of the bed now, stopping her from moving back any longer. He stepped into her again, and again and again. He was now arm's length apart and he pursed his lips at the sight of the blonde not being able to look in his direction.
"Can I ask you a question?" Damon asked. He watched as the blonde nodded slowly at him. Licking at his lips quickly, Damon hesitated before speaking up again, "Do you really think I hate you?"
He watched as her eyes shot up at that, her form backing a bit further, only to make her stumble a bit onto the side of the bed. Watching her compose herself, Damon eyed her when she seemed to nod at him. His eyes softened instantly at that, the ache at his chest returning.
"I know you do," she whispered. "I can see that you hate me," she finished, finally looking up at the man before her. Her brows furrowed at the soft expression on his face.
"How?"
"The way you look at me sometimes," Caroline started softly, "And the things you say to me...you hate me."
Damon's eyes softened, the aching at his chest growing.
"Caroline—"
"It's fine," Caroline stated. "I've gotten used to it," she finished, moving past Damon. Her breath hitching at the feeling of his hand grab at her waist, pulling her in front of him again, stopping her from moving away from him. Caroline tried to move away from him but failed when he simply pulled her in closer. "Let go of me," Caroline stated sternly, pushing at his chest again only to have him tighten his grip on her.
"Well I don't," Damon started causing Caroline's eyes to shoot up in his direction. "I don't hate you," he finished, his eyes locking with hers.
Caroline tore her eyes away from his quickly before pushing at his chest again. Sighing when he didn't seem to let her go, Caroline glanced at him before looking back at the sky that seemed to get darker and darker by the minute. "Please just let go of me," Caroline pleaded. She just wanted to be away from him. She could feel the tears starting to burn at her eyes again and Caroline needed to be away from him fast. "Please," Caroline begged softly before looking back up at him again.
She felt a tear escape her eye and fall onto her cheek and she sighed in defeat before wiping gently at it. She looked back at Damon whose eyes seemed to soften at her crying form.
"Why are you crying?" Damon asked.
Caroline's teary eyes met his and she sighed before trying to move away from him again. She whimpered slightly in frustration when he seemed to pull her even closer. "None of your business," Caroline muttered before wiping at her cheeks again.
Damon grinned at that. She was annoyed of him and he could see it.
"You're mad at me," Damon stated the obvious. He couldn't help but grin softly when the woman seemed to look away from him again.
"Could you let me go," Caroline started, sighing before wiping at her cheeks one last time.
"Sure," Damon stated. His lips were forming a smirk and he slowly allowed himself to let go of the blonde before him. Putting his arms at his sides again, Damon managed to step back and away from Caroline.
Caroline hesitantly looked over at him before starting to walk over to the bedroom door. She could feel Damon follow her out of the bedroom. She was going to Stefan to talk more about tomorrow and yet her mind was torturing herself when thinking about what had just happened. Damon hadn't even said one thing to offend or hurt her and she was surprised. She was done though, she wasn't going to let him consistently get into her mind and break her down over and over. She was going to be strong for herself, and deep down, Caroline knew she was going to survive this even though Damon seemed to think she was a lost cause.
She was going to survive this.
Review?