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Joel knew what would be waiting in the woods.
Yet he didn't bring a single knife with him. Even if there was a chance that nothing would happen, Jemma had to go and fuck it all up. He couldn't blame her, he didn't know what it was like to have all of those hormones running through him, but he couldn't imagine it'd be that pleasant.
Joel let Jemma run in front of him. He watched behind them, and saw a few Clickers at the top of the hill. He sped up a bit, and lightly pushed her from behind. The air burned his lungs. He could feel himself getting tired.
"I'll check out this ahead," he said, as they reached a corner back to the settlement. "Wait close to the trees, and stay quiet."
Joel ran down the trail, and right as he turned the corner the rise, he slammed into someone. As he regained his balance, he saw it was Tommy and another man.
"Joel, what the hell is going on? We heard screamin' and yellin'."
He raised a finger to his lips. Joel mouthed the word 'clickers,' and they all stood flush to the side of the rise. He could hear Jemma's ragged breaths.
Tommy moved slowly around the corner of the rise to where Jemma stood. She covered her mouth and nose with her hands as the Clickers approached.
Their clothes were worn thin, and were held together by mere threads. They had no shoes, and they smelled awful. The fungal growth coming out of their skulls were disturbing beautiful. They were bright red and coral colors, and if Jemma hadn't known any better, she would have wanted to reach out and touch one. Every time they clicked their mouths, she became more and more scared.
Tommy walked slowly behind one of the clickers and stabbed at the base of its skull. It didn't screech, and he was able to kill the next closest one. The other man shot the last of the three, and the group eased up.
"Why was she screaming?" Tommy asked, looking a mix of annoyance and worry.
Joel rolled his eyes. "I have no clue. She was freaking out over nothing, you know how it is. She thought it was a game or somethin'. Women."
The three men laughed.
"Joel, let's get going. I've got things to do. An' everyone back home is wondering what's going on." Tommy said, and started walking back towards town.
"Okay. Jemma, c'mon." Joel turned to where he thought she was. Jemma was gone.
He turned around to see if she was standing on the other side of the trail. She wasn't anywhere.
"Hey, where are you?!" He shouted.
"Joel, where is she?" Tommy asked, his voice riddled with disgust.
"Like hell if I know."
Joel ran through the trees where she had been. Dumb girl, he thought. She was gonna get herself killed doing shit like that.
Jemma came stumbling from behind a boulder. Her shirt and hair were covered in blood. When she saw his look, she said "Not mine."
She walked past him and the others, trying to get back to town as soon as possible. The three men were quiet as they walked back. Joel wouldn't ask her what happened back on the hill. He was pretty certain she hadn't killed anyone in her life, or seen much death.
When he got back home, he heard the shower going. Joel went into the living room. The wood burning stove was going, and as he got closer, he saw that Jemma had stuffed her clothes in it. He pulled up one of the leather chairs in front of the stove, and fell asleep.
...
"Hey, get up. Maria's here," Ellie whispered in his ear. The clothes and wood were reduced to ash. He wondered how long he had been asleep.
Maria was sitting at the kitchen table, tea in hand. She had a small smile on her face. It was like the Mona Lisa smile. The smile that said it all, yet held thousands of secrets behind the lips.
"What's up?" Joel asked, taking a seat across from her.
"Did Jemma tell you what happened?"
"No, what?"
"She killed an infected."
"I figured as much."
Maria set down her tea. "It was a child. Probably seven, maybe eight."
Joel looked away. "Mmm, okay."
"She's not doing well. I think she had a hard time with it. You know, having to kill one so young."
"And it was her first kill, of course." He added.
"I don't think so," she mused. "You can see it in her eyes. I'm thinking she's had to do some rough things in order to stay alive. Haven't we all? She wouldn't talk about it. I think she needs some time."
Joel scoffed. "I don't see what the problem is."
"Becoming a mother, I think, changes the psyche of a woman. I wouldn't know, I'm just assuming. Anyway." Maria takes a drink. "We got her a bed. She's at our place right now. I wanted her to be with Tommy. He will make her feel okay. He always does. If I were you, I wouldn't bother her until she's ready to talk."
"I don't know why I brought her around." Joel said. "Something inside of me told me to do it. A compulsion. I felt the need to help her out. The way she held herself, she looked so scared and helpless."
Maria nodded.
"I don't know. I think Ellie likes her."
"Do you like her?"
"Doesn't matter."
"God, you're so much different than Tommy. He's so kind and happy. He does what he thinks is best, for everyone. And, he's so optimistic, and lighthearted. And you..."
Joel smiled. "I'm an asshole."
She laughed a bit. "I didn't want to say it."
"Wouldn't be the first time I heard it today."
...
Jemma volunteered herself to make bread. Tommy protested, but she insisted. She told him it'd be like no other bread he had had before. She said it calmed her. And Tommy didn't want to pass up some food, either.
Tommy watched as Jemma kneaded the dough. She handled it like it was nothing. She mixed the ingredients without even measuring them. Yet, when she was done, it looked perfect. When he watched her face, she was completely absorbed by the motion. Her eyes moved with her hands, in one fluidic motion.
"I haven't made bread in a long time," she confessed, and put the dough in a pan. "If it tastes terrible, just lie to me, anyway."
He laughed. "Yeah, yeah, okay, I'm sure it will be fine. Anything is better than Maria's cookin'."
"I don't believe you."
"Well," Tommy hesitated. "I'd almost rather be eating those infected out there."
They laughed together, his guttural and her much like
Like home, Tommy thought. Jemma felt like home. Like a warm hug on a rainy day. Like pumpkin pie on Thanksgiving. He wanted to envelope himself in her aura. He made him feel comfortable, like he never had to worry about anything around her.
"What are you staring at?" She asked, her voice almost mocking.
"Nothin'."
They watched an old movie while the bread baked. It was called Robo Cop, and they both laughed the whole time.
"This is so cheesy," she said, and covered her eyes. "I can't believe it." She laughed. "The Terminator is so much better than this!"
"You've seen The Terminator?" He asked in disbelief.
"Of course, my dad had it in his collection. I didn't much like that one, either. So you must know where Robo Cop stands with me."
Tommy smiled. "Very high, right next to Starship Troopers."
She drew her knees to her stomach. "Where did you find all of these, anyway?"
"In there," he said, and pointed to the hall closet.
Jemma walked over and opened the door. It was full of movies, mostly tapes, though. "I found it!" She yelled.
"What?"
"Porn Wars, The Big Black One, Bikini Chain Gang, and, my favorite, The XXX Files."
"We have those? Where?"
"Oh," she smiled coyly. "Don't get too excited. I'm just messing with you."
"Damn it, I got my hopes up for nothin'."
She walked over, hands behind her back. "But, I did find this," she said, and handed it over to him.
"Oh, Shower Scene?" He turned it over in his hands. "You know me too well!"
Shower Scene was an 80's soft core porn movie. The cover was filled with pictures of Asian males covered in suds. Their mouths were open like they were going to eat a hot dog. All of them were wearing the same neon purple bikini bottom. The hairstyles ranged from mullets to Afros, and Tommy chuckled quietly as he remembered the past.
"100's of hot shots," he laughed. "Over fifty scenes too sudsy to make it television!" He gave it back to Jemma.
"Oh, let's give it to Joel. I think he would love this as a Christmas present!" She held it to her chest.
Tommy immediately became serious. "Don't. He can't take a joke like this. Joel... Isn't that funny."
"Are you telling me that he's so hard up that he can't handle a fucking gay Skinemax movie?"
Ellie walked into the room? "What's Skinemax?"
They looked at each other. "Well," Jemma started. "Movies with a lot of sex."
"And little to no plot," Tommy added.
"Little to no clothing-"
"Lots of suds-"
They dissolved into laughter. Ellie turned bright red.
"Jemma, we need to go home," she said, and went for the door.
Jemma sighed. "Enjoy your bread."
"Keep the movie," he answered, and handed it to her.
She tucked it into one of the large pockets of her jacket. She smiled to herself as she and Ellie headed home.
...
The house was eerily silent when the two got home.
"Joel's gone," Ellie explained. "Going hunting with some of the guys. We're trying to get as much food as much as we can before winter comes."
"When's he coming back?" She asked absently.
"Um, like a week. Whatever happens..."
She shrugged her jacket off. Jemma hated the way her oversized belly looked. She felt like it took up the whole room. When she walked she felt she was going to fall over at any moment.
"Ellie, you want to do something tonight?"
Jemma headed upstairs when she didn't hear anything. She found Ellie in her bathroom, staring at herself in the mirror. Her hair was pulled out of its usual ponytail, and it changed the way she looked completely.
"Hey, what's up?" Jemma asked, leaning against the door jamb.
Ellie jumped. "Oh, shit, you scared me!" She laughed nervously. "I was just trying to do something different. "
"With your hair?"
"Yeah, it's all wrong." Ellie motioned towards her face. "I'm sick of it."
Jemma walked over to Ellie and looked at her through the mirror.
"Maybe you could braid it."
Ellie snorted. "I don't have the patience for that."
"Well," Jemma picked up a lock of Ellie's hair. "You can pin this back and you'd look like this." She pushed against the lock of hair to give it volume. "I do this sometimes. It's easy and it looks good."
"I'm not trying to look like you. I'm trying to be myself, okay?" Ellie pushed Jemma's hands away.
Ellie walked towards the bathroom window. She pulled her hair back into the ponytail. "This works for me now."
Jemma could see black clouds forming on the horizon. "Looks like a storm is brewing tonight."
...
She and Ellie had cold soup for dinner. Jemma preferred it that way, and Ellie was too damn lazy to heat it up. They talked about dumb stuff, like boys and dresses. Jemma realized that Ellie wasn't truly the tomboy she looked like. She was raised to be utilitarian, and she fell into that groove with her habits, as well. Ellie wanted so desperately to dress up as a 'real woman' did, and leave her old self in the past.
Jemma convinced herself that she would make that possible for Ellie, in small steps.
"Ellie, can you go lock the horses up?" Jemma asked while she was washing dishes. The horses went nuts when they heard the thunder. Tommy told her so. Jemma wanted to make sure Ellie took care of it before they went to bed. She had unofficially been put in charge of the horses, since she loved being with them so much.
"Sure thing," Ellie said, and left the house.
But, on the way to the horses, Ellie found a coin sticking out of the ground. She picked it up and held it in the dim light. It was of a gold color, and it had the American seal on it. It was unlike anything she had seen. The back had a picture of a hill and sunrise, and it read Brasher. There were some other words, but Ellie didn't recognize the language.
She headed back to the house, forgetting why she was outside in the first place.
Jemma was already in bed, so Ellie dried the dishes and soon fell asleep in her own bed.
"Ellie."
Ellie could feel her body starting to wake.
"Ellie! Get up!"
She shot up in her bed, and saw Jemma standing next to her. "What's going on?" She asked, rubbing her shoulder. It was around four in the morning, she guessed.
"Did you lock up the horses?"
"Oh, fuck!" Ellie jumped out of bed, threw some shoes on, and ran outside. Jemma followed, but wasn't able to move as quickly.
The storm had moved in, and it was bad. The wind was blowing everything around, and lightning lit up the dark sky. The rain pelted their backs, and it felt like small rocks were hitting them. When they reached the horses, one had already gotten loose, and the others were following suit.
Jemma rounded them up in the stables, and Ellie followed behind her, locking each horse in.
"Let's hurry and find that other horse," Jemma yelled, but the wind was howling so loud Ellie could barely hear her.
Ellie ran towards the edge of the town, frantically searching. The wind kept changing directions, and as soon as she turned one direction to escape the rain in her eyes, it would start blowing in them again.
"Hey, I found it!" Jemma yelled, and starting running towards the lone horse. She slipped on some slick mud, and fell on her butt-hard. It knocked the wind out of her.
"You okay?!"
"Yeah," Jemma got to her feet. "I'm fine. Lets go."
They found the horses running in circles. When it saw Jemma, it reared, but Ellie came from behind her and the horse settled down a bit. They led it to the others, and Ellie locked it.
Jemma breathed a sigh of relief, and laughed out of sheer stress. "Holy shit, I'm going to kill you for that."
Ellie laughed, but as she turned to face her, she looked at Jemma's feet.
"Oh, my God, you're bleeding."
Jemma looked down at the ground to see a little pool of blood. It was staring to dilute from the rain, but the bright red could be nothing else.
All at once, she could feel her baby shift down inside of her. It was for real now. She felt a wave of nausea as the realization hit her. She was going to have this baby, tonight.
"Ellie, we need to hurry. Go get Maria."