Notes: Episode 132, "A Couple Made for Each Other! Usagi and Mamoru's Love". Or, "The one where Mamoru's old friend figures out Usagi is Sailor Moon".

Episode 132

"Then Mamo-chan RIPPED through his jacket, like it wasn't even a big thing! (And I know how much he paid for that jacket so I know it WAS a big thing.) Then swoosh!" Usagi made a sweeping arm gesture.

"Stab!" She mimed a dagger thrust.

"Thhhpppttt!" She ran in haphazard circles, tongue waggling in an approximation of a balloon losing all its air.

Rei watched all of this with only a slight crease between her eyebrows. Her casual stride never slowed, even as Usagi ran in front of her in one direction then turned and ran back again, her arms outstretched like she was about to take flight.

It was the third time Rei had heard the story.

It wasn't any better than the first two times.

"You nearly died," she said. Not accusing, not angry. A fact. A very disturbing, very real fact.

Usagi fell back into step with Rei and shrugged. "Nah, it was fine."

"You nearly DIED," Rei repeated. She couldn't tell who she was saying it for.

"Mamo-chan was there. And even if he wasn't, you guys would've been."

She said it like she'd just get strawberry ice cream if they were out of chocolate.

They WOULDN'T have been though, and that was the entire point. The Senshi been caught on a train miles away when they felt Usagi transform, felt that she was in danger. The stupid train with its stupid track problems and its stupid being stuck in the middle of nowhere and being stupidly crowded. They'd been seconds away from wrenching the doors open and running out, identities be damned, when they'd felt Usagi detransform and knew she was okay.

But they hadn't been there.

Rei hadn't been there.

And Usagi had nearly—

She looked down as Usagi wrapped herself around her arm. She tried to tug it free. She failed.

"So like I said, I need your help." If Usagi felt Rei trying to reclaim her arm she clearly didn't care. "Very important. Super important. MOST IMPORTANT."

Rei rolled her eyes. "Right, important, I got it. What is it?"

Then she realized they'd stopped walking and were inside of a store, surrounded by bursts of vivid colour on all sides. Where the heck?

"Horse or hippo?"

Rei swallowed a shriek and stepped back as two grotesque stuffed animals were thrust in her face.

"C'mon, which? Horse?" The horse that was mere inches from Rei's nose wiggled, "Or hippo?" Now the hippo shook. Rei supposed it was a hippo. She only had Usagi's word on that one.

THIS was what made her delay her chores today. Excellent. "Horse," Rei said.

"Really?" Usagi pulled them close, cradling them, staring into their little buck-toothed faces. "You don't think the hippo is better?"

Rei sighed. "Fine, hippo."

"But what about the horse? With his tiny little mane and adorable bushy tail?"

"Then get the horse!" Rei was beginning to talk through her clenched teeth again. She was kind of surprised it had taken this long.

Usagi glared at Rei bitterly. "You're not helping!"

"Get both if you must. Why is this a thing?"

"I can only afford one, and I need to make the best choice to assure maximum happiness!"

"Seriously?" Rei said, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"Completely very seriously! Now help me pick! Which would you buy?"

"Neither, they're both awful."

Usagi clutched the toys close and gasped, twisting her body to protect them from Rei's cruel, thoughtless words. "Rei-chan!" She sounded positively scandalized.

"Oh for—" Rei plucked both plushies from Usagi's arms, marched to the front counter and pushed them at the clerk. "These. Quickly," she said.

A few minutes later they were outside and Usagi was nuzzling and cooing at her new treasures. Rei just shook her head.

"See?" Usagi said, peeking around the horse. "When I need you, you're there."

For a brief, rare moment, Rei was at a loss for words. They soon returned to her.

"You know you're paying me back for those."

"Uh-huh." Usagi said absently.

"I mean it. As soon as you get your next allowance, I expect payment in full."

"Sure, sure."

"The very day."

"Hippo loves you, you know."

"U-sa-giii."