Chapter 12: She's Gone

Dallas wakes up with a pounding headache and a taste of alcohol and bad decisions. He feels a body in the bed next to him, and, believing it to be Shirley, runs to tangle his fingers in her hair…

This isn't her hair.

Panic settles in; he adjusts his eyes to his surroundings.

This isn't his bed.

This isn't his room.

He peels back the covers.

They're naked.

The mysterious woman groans and turns on her side facing him.

It's Sylvia.

Memories of last night flash before his eyes and the feelings of guilt, shame, and terror erupt in his body…and his stomach. He slides out of the bed and makes his way to the downstairs bathroom after buttoning his jeans.

Throwing up the last of the alcohol, he guzzles water from the bathroom sink and spits out the residue.

"Dally? Dal? You in here?"

Buck's worried voice makes him jolt. He opens the door and sees his friend look at him with worry.

"Your old lady been worried sick. She done rounded up your dad and Darry and they'd been looking all over for you. I told them you weren't here because…" he gestures upstairs.

"Oh, God, what have I done?" he runs his fingers through his hair.

"You tell me, man. Good God Almighty, is Sylvia a loud one! I guess that's why you can't get enough eh?"

"It's a mistake. A horrible mistake." He sighs.

"It never happened. Keep your mouth shut. This never happened, and it will never happen again."

"My lips are sealed, but I'm more worried about Sylvia's end…"

They both look upstairs.

"We'll get to that crossroad when we get there. Now, I need to go home. She's waiting for me."

"Good luck, man. You're gonna need it when Sylvia wakes up and doesn't find you there."

"She'll live."

Dallas finds his jacket, throws it on, and leaves Buck's.

"Where the hell have you been? I've been up all night waiting for you! Do you know how scared I was? I thought you had died, I thought you were in a ditch somewhere! I was so scared, so…" Shirley breaks down into tears. Dallas swoops her up in his arms and hugs her.

"Baby, baby, shh…I was out drinking and I crashed over their place because I know you wouldn't want me coming home drunk. Don't cry, baby. I'm here, now, you dig?"

"I'm so glad you're…" she trails off.

"What's wrong, doll—"

"—you smell like perfume…" she pulls away from him. She grabs his jacket and pulls it down at his neck.

"Is…is that a hickey?"

"Baby, I can explain…"

"Get out."

"What?"

"Did I stutter? Get. Out." She flails out of his arms.

"Baby, you don't have to—"

"—Get out."

"—if you just let me—"

"—Get out."

"Shirley—"

"Get the fuck out of this house!" she's hitting him on the shoulders, chest, and arms.

"I had gotten ostracized from my family, blacklisted from getting a job, beaten and raped by the fucking police because of you and this is how you repay me? By fucking some whore?"

"Shirley—"

"I can't even look at you right now. Go. Go until I can deal with this! Go!"

"But I paid for—"

"You think I care? Get out!" She points to the door.

"It's like that?"

"It's like that."

"It was a mistake, Shirley. I was angry and she was there…"

"I don't want to hear it. Get out, please. Go."

"I love you, Shirley…"

"People who love each other don't sleep around behind their backs. Get gone."

Dallas looks at her, the words dying on his tongue. He walks out the door and she slams it behind him.

"Kids these days!" Mr. Winston shakes his head. Dallas lies back on his couch, nursing a hangover.

"Pop, not today…"

"Oh, you're gonna hear it today! Damn your feelings!" He pops a beer.

"Out of all the people you could've chosen to cheat on your girlfriend with, it had to be fucking Sylvia!" He crinkles his nose.

"That girl is nothing but trouble. If your mother met her, she'd kill you for being so stupid. There are such better options out there, son! That cute brunette from down the block, that blonde girl that comes by with that Sodapop fellow…maybe even that…Sherri, Cherry, whatever the hell her name is. That girl is classy."

"That girl wanted me for a quick fuck and street cred. Nothing gets a stuck-up girl's engine running than a bad boy to piss off their daddy. Some class." Dallas snorts.

"But she's much better than Sylvia. Sylvia doesn't work, she's not educated, she has no home training whatsoever…"

"…And she was there for me when I needed her and I'm still sweet on her. We got history together, Pop."

"Some history is meant to be forgotten. You are supposed to turn a new leaf, start fresh. That girl is going to have you back in your old ways…"

"It's over between us, Pop. It was a moment of weakness." Dallas sighs.

"I've been stressing, being Shirley's caretaker than her lover, cleaning those sheets every single night because she's been peeing in the bed. I lost my job and it's been hard looking for one. Bills have been piling up and we're about to lose the apartment…I just wanted to fade away that night. I was drinking, Sylvia was there, and…" Dallas grabs at his hair.

"If I could change what I did, I would. But I can't. I have to deal with it. I was a cheating dog and she put me in the dog house because of it. I just gotta wait it out until she lets me come back inside."

"You can stay here for as long as you need. You two living together isn't the smartest decision, anyway. She needs to go back to her family, get her life back on track. And you need time to take care of yourself. Think of this as a good thing."

"Pop, I hurt her. I hurt her bad."

"I know. But your mother always told me the deepest wounds can heal over time."

"I think we should break up."

Dallas almost spit out his drink. They're at Buck's, in Dallas's old room, shielded away from prying eyes.

"For our own sake." Shirley adds to soften the blow.

It had been two weeks since Dallas' infidelity had been discovered, two weeks since they decided a little air from each other is best. Now she wants to break it off permanently?

"Why?"

"For starters, you cheated on me." She retorts.

"Secondly, this is just bad timing for both of us. Everyone has a problem with us being together and look where it got us. It's been a wonderful couple of months, but it's not worth all of this hardship. It's put a strain on both of us; we're stressed out, always looking over our shoulder, drained." She shakes her head.

"Fuck what everyone has to say—"

"—Look where it got us, Dal. I've been harassed, beaten, violated, ostracized from my family, practically homeless and blacklisted from working in this town and to top it all off the one person I needed in my corner went behind my back and fucked some broad. I can't put up with this. I'm breaking up with you before my heart gets too broken and I can't repair it. I'm sorry." She slides of the ring Dallas gave her and pressed it into his palm.

"I have to focus on me, right now. I have to get my life back on track. I can't live with looking over my shoulder and having you as my nurse than as my lover. I love you, Dallas. But I'm afraid this love isn't enough to save our relationship and us. It's for the best."

She kisses him softly on the lips. Dallas pulls her close.

"You call that a goodbye kiss? If you're going to kiss me goodbye, make it count." He breathes against her lips. He kisses her with all of his might, trying to will her into rethinking her decision, into believing that maybe their relationship could be saved. He becomes desperate; he pulls her so close to him he nearly smothers her. He kisses her neck, suckles on the collarbone, whispering praises and promises he knows he'll keep if she gives him another chance. She halts him.

"Stop. Don't make it harder than it already is." Her eyes are shimmering with tears.

"Stay. Please. Please." He cups her face, his forehead touching hers.

"I can't. I can't stay. I'm sorry." The tears fell. She pushes him away, grabs her purse, and heads out the door.

"It's for our own good. Maybe one day, people won't care who's dating who. Maybe there will be a time where people can love whoever without consequence. But I don't see it in this lifetime. Not at all." She wipes away her tears.

"I love you, Dallas. I love you so much it hurts. But I have to go. I can't do this anymore. I'm sorry." She closes the door.

"Shirley. Shirley, wait!" He runs after her.

"Shirley, Shirley, Shirley!" he hollers out after her, but it's too late.

She's gone.

He turns and finds everyone staring at him.

"What the fuck are you looking at?" He snaps. The partygoers flinch but say nothing. Dallas stalks back to his old room and slams the door. He steps on something and he tumbles onto his bed. Groaning, he picks the offending object out of his foot and finds the ring Shirley left behind.

"She's gone." He says to the room.

"She's really gone."

No matter how hard he fights it, the tears come.

And he lets them.