Notes: Episode 141, "Storm of Love! Minako's Grand Two Timing Plan". Or, "The one where Minako dates two of the Trio at once."
Episode 141
"Ami-chan, you're not prowling." Minako eyed her friend with disapproval. She had specifically given the order to prowl. Ami was, at best, skulking.
Worried blue eyes took in their surroundings. "Maybe I could prowl better later. Somewhere else. Not here."
As though that was all the discussion needed, Ami turned on her heel. She managed one step toward the exit before Minako's arms were around her and steering her back to the inside of the booming nightclub, the flashing lights, the throngs of dancers, and their waiting friends.
Minako rested her chin on Ami's shoulder and spoke directly into her ear, giving herself the best chance at being heard above the loud, pulsating music. "Out there, you're Ami Mizuno, aspiring young high school hopeful and top scorer of countless national exams." Her voice dropped to what was supposed to be a dangerous yet alluring purr. "But in here you're Nana Asahiro—"
"Mara Asahari!" Ami corrected in a panicked voice. She whirled toward the entrance and the distressingly large bouncer who had given their new IDs a bored once-over before waving them inside. If he'd heard Minako's slip – and given the noise and distance even Ami had to admit it was unlikely – he clearly didn't care.
Neither did Minako. "—recent graduate and experienced woman-about-town looking for a night of fun and potential romance!"
"I'm really not any of those things," Ami said weakly before Minako gave her an enthusiastic shove forward. She stumbled a few paces before she was caught and steadied between Makoto and Rei. Usagi beamed at Ami and patted her arm. Mako frowned and looked like she was going to snap at Minako, but blinked instead as Minako was suddenly directly in front of her.
"We are on the prowl!" Minako repeated, clenching her fist dramatically.
"On the prowl!" echoed Usagi, appearing at Minako's side and mirroring her pose.
"We are hopeful girls exploring the fleeting days of our youth!" they continued in perfect synchronicity. "We won't let age be the barrier to love's calling!"
"Oh boy," Mako said, pinching the bridge of her nose.
Minako and Usagi joined hands and raised them overhead in triumph. "Maidens, club your love!"
Somehow, Ami was blushing harder. "I- I don't think that's what you meant to say."
"They're hopeless when they're like this," Rei told her. She rubbed Ami's back comfortingly while guiding her deeper into the nightclub. "Let's just get this over with."
Minako and Usagi remained frozen like a matching set of victorious blonde statues. A couple entering the club circled around them in a wide berth, unable to keep from staring.
Mako shook her head. "You two worry me, you know."
Simultaneously, Usagi and Minako dropped out of their finishing pose and giggled at Mako. It didn't help with the worrying.
... ... ...
Another thing not helping with the worrying was being here at all.
Mako had readily agreed when Minako brought up the idea. Not just to be a wall between her friends and trouble, but the thought of going out and being all adult and mature and maybe meeting some cute older guys? Because let's face it, the only decent boyfriend-type she'd met yet was Mamoru, so maybe Usagi was on to something.
What Mako had NOT expected was to feel like she was walking around with a giant neon sign over her head that screamed "LIAR!"
Maybe she was. Maybe she just didn't notice with all the strobe laser light crap going on.
Mako couldn't help but check to make sure, cringing at her own silliness even as she looked up and over her shoulder.
Whew. No sign. That didn't actually help though. Now it felt like she was lying about lying. Ugh, this couldn't get worse.
"Hi!"
Mako jumped several feet and whirled around. Standing next to her was a tall guy with short blonde hair and a friendly smile. He's cute! reported the part of Mako's brain constantly accessing such things. Still she remained frozen with an expression of utter fear on her face.
"My name's Jason." His Japanese was good, but bore the heavy accent of a foreigner. "What's your name?"
Oh god. Oh god what was her name? In the flush of panic, all knowledge deserted her. What was her fake name? What was her real name? What was this guy's name? (he just said it, oh god!) And a foreigner! What if he was some dignitary? What if she insulted him by lying? What if she started an international incident? World War III would break out and it would be ALL HER FAULT.
Jason stood watching while Mako's face contorted through assorted stages of terror. It was almost cute, for a second, but the longer it went on, the more concerned he felt. "Hey, are you okay?"
"No!" Mako shouted, even as relief washed over her. Finally, something she could answer honestly! But was it too little too late? The fate of millions rested on Mako's next action.
She ran.
... ... ...
Rei gave Mako's shoulder one final pat before she slid out of the booth. Minako was in the middle of a rousing pep talk, and it was best to escape that madness now.
She'd been of two minds about all this. On the one hand, Minako pretty much proved her point about the dubious quality of people you'd meet in a place like this. On the other hand, Minako's dates BOTH turning out to be bad guys meant that they didn't count at all in Rei's book, and so she still had a chance to win.
So if they were doing this, Rei was DOING this.
She strode to the bar full of purpose, her heels clacking on the floor like a crier announcing her passage. She kept her gaze locked on her destination, completely removed from any stir she might be causing. A stir which she stole a quick glance to confirm was happening. Eyes were following her. Good. She didn't care, but she hadn't spent an hour choosing this outfit for nothing, after all.
Finally Rei reached the bar and waited – with just the right amount of impatience, in her estimation – to be served. Everything was going exactly as it should.
Until, of course, Usagi. "What'cha getting?"
Every ounce of Rei's carefully crafted poise was instantly sucked away. "A drink, what do you think?" she hissed back. She took a half-step to the right to put distance between them. Usagi just took that as Rei making room for her and settled in comfortably.
"Oo, get me a cream soda!"
Rei's eye twitched. "It's a bar, Usagi, they don't have cream soda!"
Usagi huffed and glared angrily at the rows of colourful bottles on the back wall, none of which were apparently actually GOOD. "What is with drink places not selling cream soda?" she accused everything.
Whatever retort Rei was going to make died as the bartender finally appeared. "What can I get you?" he asked.
That was when Rei realized she had no idea.
She'd visualized this scenario perfectly, had played it in her head from start to finish. Usagi hadn't been in it, true, but otherwise it had all unfolded exactly as intended.
But she'd been so intent on the perfect build-up to ordering the drink, her successful return to the booth with drink in-hand, and the admiration that would pour from her friends at her style and maturity, that she forgot the step of actually ordering the drink.
Shit.
The bartender was watching her expectantly. Even worse, so was Usagi.
Shit shit shit.
Rei tapped her foot, the only outward expression of her agitation, and tried to think hard. She couldn't just do a standard mixer. Anyone could order a rum and coke or a scotch and … coke. Rei needed something flashy, something visually stunning. She thought hard on her winning mental scenario. The drink she imagined in her hand was cool and had an olive on a toothpick and was in a classy glass with a wide mouth and a long stem and was—
"Red!" Rei nearly shouted at the bartender.
He waited for a moment but nothing else seemed to be coming. "A Red…?" he prompted.
There must be lots of drinks that began with "red". And now Usagi was beginning to give her that look. She needed something, anything. Rei's foot-tapping speed increased, and then inspiration struck.
"Red High Heel," she ordered with absolute confidence in this drink she'd just made up.
"Wow, that sounds WAY cooler than a cream soda!" Usagi exclaimed. Rei somehow managed to puff up just a little bit more.
The bartender wasn't sold. He couldn't entirely keep the sneer out of his voice as he said, "I've never heard of that drink before."
Seriously? All the ridiculous drink names in the world but not this? Rei felt herself begin to flush with embarrassment. So she reacted naturally.
She yelled.
"What do you mean you've never heard of a 'Red High Heel' before? You call this a bar? This is the worst club I've ever been in!"
The bartender was holding up his dish towel and trying to hide behind it. Rei was about to comment on that, too, when she felt Usagi tugging at her arm.
"Hey, Rei-chan, maybe order something else?"
Oh no. This was now a matter of pride. Rei may not have known drinks, but she DID know pride. She eyed the lines of bottles behind the cowering bartender. "I've got a better idea."
... ... ...
Minako surveyed her friends, her loyal soldiers in this second attempt at Operation: Love Club (first attempt not a FAILURE, but not entirely successful, she grudgingly admitted).
There was Makoto, who looked like she wanted to throw up and kept glancing over her head like she was expecting to see something hanging there. She wasn't into Operation: Love Club quite like Minako was hoping, but the evening was young, and so were they!
Now that Ami had Mako to fuss over, she seemed to have mostly forgotten her own anxiety. Well, thanks to Mako, and the backstory that Ami and Minako had been working on for Ami's fake ID persona. She'd ALMOST gotten Ami to the point of instinctively saying she was a fighter pilot. Minako desperately hoped that someone would ask Ami what she did before the night was out, and that they did it while Minako was in earshot.
Rei had been looking thoroughly pleased with herself since returning with a blood red drink in an oversized martini glass the size of her face.
"What's that?" Minako had asked.
"Red High Heel," Rei replied nonchalantly. Then she took one sip, battled for a solid minute to keep her expression neutral, and finally wheezed "It's good."
She'd barely touched the drink since, but she HAD it, and that was the point. Minako was confident that this conquest had put Rei in the best possible mood. She'd be up for whatever Minako suggested. Eeeeexcellent.
Finally Minako looked at Usagi, who seemed flushed and a little unfocused, but this WAS Operation: Love Club, so Minako understood perfectly.
They'd had time to get acclimated to the new environment and to get their bearings. The crowd was primed and ready for them. Most important of all though, Minako was getting bored.
It was time to begi-
"What the hell? Usagi, have you been drinking this?"
"YES."
Usagi flopped her head against Rei's arm with such force that Rei nearly tipped over in the booth.
"Yes I did, steamed squid!"
Ami's eyes widened. "Food rhymes!"
Rei had managed to regain her balance and snatched her drink from where it had slowly crept over to Usagi's side of the table. Minako noted that only about a fourth was gone, but then it WAS a martini glass the size of Rei's face. And it WAS Usagi. Oh boy.
"What were you thinking?" Rei said to Usagi, trying to get her to sit up straight. Or at least to not lean all over her. She'd just had this dress dry cleaned and the last thing it needed was drool.
Usagi did not seem even remotely inclined to be straightened, however and she slumped further into Rei. "You said I could have a sip!" she complained petulantly. She waved her hand in the general direction of the glass and made grabby motions with her fingers.
"A SIP, not half the drink!" Rei slid it to Mako, who pulled it well out of Usagi's reach. Tentatively, she sniffed, and then recoiled.
"God, Rei, what's in this?"
"I have no idea," Rei muttered, trying to push Usagi's head up, but it was like fighting with very drunk play-doh.
"I think," Ami said to Minako while keeping a wary eye on Rei and Usagi, "that we may need to call it a night."
Mako seized this idea like the drowning woman she was. "Yes! Yes, we should all leave very fast before the first missiles are launched!"
Everyone stopped to stare at her. Even Usagi raised one sluggish eyebrow and rolled her head to the other side.
Mako blushed under the attention. "Uh, I mean. Because. Princess."
Rei tried once more to push Usagi off of her, then sighed and gave up. Usagi collapsed against her in a giggling heap and muttered something about split peas.
"You know we're not going to be able to enjoy it," Rei told Minako. She straightened her dress and tried to look as dignified as possible while also basically wearing Usagi, then added, "I stopped enjoying it about five minutes ago."
Minako hated to admit defeat, but knew it when she saw it. She bowed her head. "I hereby officially call an end to Operation: Love Club: Second Phase."
"Wait, that's really what you were calling it?"
Minako clenched her jaw and very studiously did not look at Ami. Instead, she pointed at Usagi. "Makoto!"
It all meant they were leaving, and that was music to Mako's ears. She leapt to her feet and was instantly kneeling next to Usagi. "C'mon, you."
Usagi's turn was way more pronounced than necessary and her face lit up when she saw who was talking to her. "Mako-chan!" she cried and flung her arms around the taller girl's neck.
"Usagi-chan!" Mako said with echoing enthusiasm. When Usagi didn't let go, Mako shrugged and simply stood up. Usagi dangled there, but seemed otherwise completely content.
As the others left the club, Minako lingered for one more longing look. Love was here, somewhere, she just knew it! She'd just have to convince everyone to come back next week. Third time would definitely be the charm.