Notes: Episode 142, "Mansion of Secrets! The Menu of Love to You". Or, "The one with the rude old woman in the giant house who waits like twenty years for her chef boyfriend to come back."

Episode 142

"Is your food good, Haruka-san?"

Haruka's answer was a series of noises.

"That's Haruka for 'yes'," Michiru translated for Usagi as she cut a small sliver of steak and delicately placed it in her mouth.

After a few more seconds of chewing, Haruka was finally able to swallow. Her grin was completely without shame. "We were on a plane for ten hours! Real food is good!"

Not to be outdone, Usagi shoved a boulder of food in her own mouth. "s'guf! I shaf s'wnrs!"

Haruka and Michiru merely blinked.

Usagi rushed through her mouthful in record speed, audibly swallowing. "It IS good! I saved the owners!" Usagi waved enthusiastically at the elderly woman who was placing a tureen of stew on a table before hungry diners. She waved back, smiling happily.

"See?"

"Does this mean we get a discount on your lunch?" Haruka asked, eyeing the many plates in front of Usagi.

Usagi just laughed and shoveled in more food.

"I was wondering how you'd discovered a restaurant like this." Michiru balanced her chin on the back of her hand and considered the lavish house and courtyard dining. "It seemed unlike your usual tastes."

"Excuse me!"

It was a high-pitched, thoroughly saccharine voice, yet still somehow filled with the highest indignity. Haruka and Michiru glanced around, but couldn't find the speaker.

"Mayako-san is the finest cook I have ever tasted, next to Makoto-sama! That Usagi-sama can appreciate this food despite what she usually eats is proof of Mayako-san's skill!"

Usagi had been looking at the seemingly empty chair at their table with amused fondness. It quickly vanished. "What was that?"

"Diana!" Chibi-Usa cried as she ran up to the table. Haruka raised her hand in greeting, but Chibi-Usa ignored the visiting Senshi in favour of glowering at the chair. "You shouldn't have run off, and you shouldn't be talking! You don't even know who this is!"

Much to Michiru and Haruka's surprise, a tiny grey bundle of fur and propriety leapt from the chair to the table. "Of course I recognize Haruka-sama and Michiru-sama!" The kitten put every ounce of offense she could manage behind her words. It was a surprising amount.

Usagi and Chibi-Usa were both whirling their heads back and forth to make sure their secret talking cat remained a secret, but it was a busy lunch rush and nobody was paying attention. Least of all Haruka and Michiru.

"Oh my!" Michiru said, leaning over until she was nearly eye level with Diana. "Aren't you simply adorable?"

"Yes!" Diana replied without a hint of arrogance.

Michiru's laugh was like the tinkling of bells and Haruka couldn't keep from grinning at the sound.

"Oh I like this one, Haruka." Michiru reached out and scratched between Diana's ears, her fingers immediately finding just the right spot. Diana mewed in response and padded closer, leaning in to the touch.

Haruka chuckled as Michiru fawned over the kitten. "Hey now, don't wear yourself out!"

Michiru's response was to scoop Diana up and cradle her in her arms. As the sunlight glinted off of Michiru's necklace, Diana's cat side seemed to take over. On her back, her paws scrabbled in the air, batting at the charm. Under her breath, in a fierce and determined little voice she repeated, "I will get you! I will get you!"

Michiru's giggle was one of pure delight, and Haruka shook her head. "That seems a bit fast for a first meeting."

"Didn't you hear? She already knows us." Michiru only had eyes for Diana as she swung the end of her necklace in a circle over the kitten's head. Diana's response was a flurry of paws, both front and back.

Haruka leaned over Michiru's arm and peered closer at Diana. "I don't know. This could be a trap. Maybe she's our enemy."

"I am not!" Diana squeaked in protest, but her eyes never left her necklace prey.

"And there you go," Michiru told Haruka, the matter clearly settled.

Haruka slid her chin up to rest on Michiru's shoulder. "Of course the enemy would say that."

"Why Haruka, are you jealous?"

"Should I be?"

"Perhaps."

Chibi-Usa watched this exchange with a puzzled frown. Adults were so confusing. She had the sense that there was something here she really wanted to ask Pegasus about later, if she could only think of what it was.

As for Usagi, she didn't get it either, but that was pretty much what she'd come to expect from the Outer Senshi. Whatever was going on, it had nothing to do with anybody else any more. Usagi grabbed another forkful and continued eating. So long as the food kept coming, that was fine with her.

Ideally this was going to be more Michiru and Diana-focused, but god damn it is hard to write Haruka and Michiru in a casual scene that does not become 1000% about Haruka and Michiru flirting with each other. Still, I now have the mental image of Diana cradled in Michiru's arms saying "I will get you!" over and over and hopefully you find that as deeply satisfying as I do.