Notes: Episode 145, "Aim for the Prima! Usagi's Ballet". Or, "The one where Usagi tries to join the ballet."

Episode 145

Visitors were the last thing Mamoru was expecting, yet there again was a knock at the door. Usako knew this paper was due soon, and everyone else … well there really wasn't anyone else. Certainly no one who wouldn't call first. Curiosity as much as ingrained social response compelled him to see who it was.

Almost immediately he regretted his mistake.

"Oh, Rei-chan! What are you—"

"You suck, Mamoru," Rei responded, pushing him aside as she strode into his apartment.

"Hello, won't you come in," he muttered to himself. He stuck his head in the hall and looked for the others, but no, Rei had come on her own. He felt a chill run down his spine. Oh god, what had he done now?

"Do you know what you've done now?"

Mamoru clenched his eyes tightly and winced. His mind raced through important dates and came up empty. He had absolutely no idea, and couldn't decide if his ignorance was going to make things better or worse.

Time to find out.

Rei was standing in the living room, arms crossed and glare turned up to full. Even after all this time of seeing that glare, of experiencing it firsthand, some part of him was impressed that it was still terrifying. He wondered if there would ever come a point where it would lose its effect.

"Well?" Rei demanded.

No, Mamoru was pretty sure it would always be scary.

"I don't know what's upset you, but I'm sure we can— OW!"

Mamoru cried out more in surprise than actual pain, and his hand flew to where Rei had just cuffed him on the back of the head.

"You called Usagi fat!"

"I don't— OW!"

"With the ballet monster!"

"But I didn't—" This time he expected it and neatly dodged as Rei's hand swished through the air. But she expected it too, and her other hand caught him. "OW!"

Rei jabbed her finger into Mamoru's shoulder. "You don't tell your girlfriend to go on a diet! What is wrong with you!"

"I didn't mean it!" Mamoru exclaimed, thrusting his hands up as though this would somehow protect him. "I was joking!"

Rei looked at him as with every ounce of incredulous disdain she could muster. Which was, as it turned out, a lot. "How is that a joke? That's not a joke, it's just mean!"

Mamoru rubbed at his shoulder sullenly. "And it's not 'just mean' when you do it?"

That took Rei so by surprise, her eyes crossed for a second. "That's different!"

"Oh? How?"

Rei's mouth opened but no words came out. That only made her angrier. She wasn't supposed to be on the defensive, dammit! Her indignation surged and helped her reclaim her voice. "I don't know, it just is! Look, you can't say stuff like that to your girlfriend, you idiot. It upsets her, and then we have to listen to her cry for hours."

"Cry?" Instantly, regret flooded through him. Sailor Moon had just stayed very still and quiet when he'd made the joke (and wasn't it obviously a joke? Didn't Usako know how much he loved everything about her?), and then she'd started yelling at Chibi-Moon. After that, she hadn't given any indication that she even remembered he'd said it.

When clearly she did, and was hurt so badly by it she was crying to her friends.

He felt like something you scraped off the bottom of your shoe.

"There, now you get it," Rei said, watching his face fall. Her voice was gentle though, even if he felt like more yelling and angry headsmacking was what he deserved.

Huge, worried eyes gazed at Rei. "I really didn't mean it. I just though it would be funny if we bickered a bit like we used to."

Rei placed a hand on his shoulder and shook her head. Men. "Mamoru, do you REALLY want things between you two like they used to be?"

Endless squabbling, inability to be in the same place without harsh words, things always bouncing off of his head. He hadn't realized then how much he enjoyed it, but to trade it for the quiet moments? The moments where he'd finally, for the first time in his truncated memories, known peace?

Never.

Okay then. Mamoru straightened his shoulders. He messed up, so he'd fix it. Easy.

Uhm, right?

Rei watched Mamoru, amused at how obvious was his every single thought. He and Usagi both, totally useless.

"You're talking her out to dinner tonight," she told him in a firm voice that was not to be questioned. "And you're telling her – REPEATEDLY – how beautiful she is."

His mind filled with a vision of Usagi in a lovely dress, sitting across from him at a candlelit table, shoveling in mouthful after mouthful of food. "I think I can do that," he said with an affectionate smile.

"Good!" Rei breezed past him for the door. "And Mamoru?"

He held up one hand and placed the other over his heart. "I won't do it again."

Rei narrowed her eyes. Her smile was anything but comforting. "If you do," she promised while waving a finger, "next time I'll bring the others."

The door clicked behind her, leaving Mamoru alone with that pleasant thought.

Because SERIOUSLY, Mamoru. Seriously.