Six weeks after the court case Arthur went back to court, leaving Merlin with Mithian. Today was the day for sentencing. Morgause, Valiant and Cendred were given life sentences with recommendation that they serve at least eighteen years and Edwin who had been prosecuted on lesser charges, was given fifteen years with recommendation he serve at least ten. Morgause had tried to claim unsound mind after she was found guilty but this was not upheld after psychiatric reports.
When he got home Arthur told Merlin the verdicts and the young man let out the breath he had been holding since he had seen Arthur arrive home.
Merlin wasn't sure what he felt. It was over, yes, but nothing really had changed. Will as still dead and his life was still a mess. He knew he would never be the same person again. After all, he person he had been was dead and buried in that room. He started to cry, not out of relief but, for what he had lost.
He felt he shouldn't feel this way but he couldn't stop himself. Arthur, sensing his distress, pulled him into his arms and held onto him while he cried himself out.
Merlin eventually pulled himself away and made his way to their bedroom where he lay on the bed. Arthur followed him but he asked to be left alone. Arthur closed the door and went to find Hunith.
He found her in the kitchen and told her the verdict and what Merlin's reaction had been.
"Are you surprised Arthur? After all, the verdict doesn't really change anything for him. Nothing can change what has happened. Yes, he will take comfort that they cannot hurt anyone else but it won't bring back the person he was." Hunith handed Arthur a cup of coffee.
"Let's go and sit down, we need to let him think things through, don't worry. He will come to see it was all he could expect. It must be hard for you, I know, your life is the law but I think this will show you that justice doesn't solve the whole problem."
Arthur sat and thought about what Hunith had said and realised she was right. Yes, four people were now in prison, but they still had to live with the aftermath. There were no fixes in situations like theirs. He sat and waited for Merlin to come out of the bedroom.
When after a couple of hours Merlin still hadn't emerged, Arthur quietly opened the bedroom door, he wanted to check Merlin was ok. He found that Merlin had drifted off to an obviously uneasy sleep. He took of his shoes and lay down beside the still figure. Watching Merlin for signs he was starting to have a nightmare.
He loved Merlin more than he could say and wished he could make things better for him. He felt foolish at his first reaction to the verdict thinking they had won, but Hunith was right there were no winner's, only losers.
Later, when Merlin opened his eyes and saw Arthur there next to him he held out his arms for a cuddle.
"I'm sorry Arthur; I spoiled your news for you"
Arthur held his husband and kissed his forehead.
"No you were right, nothing has changed but we will make it change, we will make our lives better. We both know how precious life is and we will lead it to the full and do things that make us happy. I'm going to work less and we are going to spend more of our time together" he smiled gently "I can't change what happened but I can change our future. I will work part time for a few years and then I will retire early. I won't give up yet because I still need to know I am making a difference to people. But you are the most important person in my life. Don't ever doubt that."
For a minute, they lay together quietly. Then Merlin asked what happened now.
"Now are you going to get up" Arthur stated. "Your Mum will worry about you and I suspect the crowd will descend later. I know for sure Gwaine will be here, he told me he would only give us a couple of hours before he came over. I know we will regret having him live so close!"
Merlin managed a slight chuckle at that. "You might I won't, I need him about to keep your ego under control."
They both got up. Arthur changed out of his now crumpled suit into something more casual and then walked to the sitting room together.
They had hardly been sat down for a few minutes when Gwaine arrived with a bottle of champagne in his hand. Within an hour all their friends had descended. Hunith greeted them all at the door and quietly told them not to get carried away with their celebrations before letting them in. In the end they had a quiet few drinks to celebrate the end of the court case and toast new beginnings.
That night Merlin wanted Arthur to make love to him. When they tried Merlin couldn't go through with it. He got upset thinking Arthur would get fed up with having no sex life. Arthur reassured Merlin telling him that he loved Merlin with or without sex. It was after all called making love, not having sex. And he was willing to wait as long as it took, and if it never happened they could still kiss, cuddle and be together.
"Together forever always MINE" he reminded his best friend and husband.
The next night Merlin took the lead and made love to Arthur. It took a bit of sorting due to Merlin leg but it was the first time they had enjoyed such intimate contact. And it made them both happy.