"Are we there yet?"
"Jesus Christ, you ain't one of those kids, are you?" Carl smiles at me, I nudge his shoulder. He's a tough kid. The shit he's seen, the shit he's had to do? How many kids have to shoot their own mom in the fuckin' head?
"We can always play I Spy. It'll pass the time. Winner gets the last candy bar. What do you say, Carl?" Carl just laughs at her, tells her it ain't much of a game when everything looks the same out here. She told him he was too afraid she'd get that candy. I have to admire her; Michonne gets the kid. They've been teasin' an' laughin' this whole damn trip. It's obvious the effect she has on him.
Rick slacks back to be at my side. I can tell he wants to talk to me 'bout somethin'. Somethin' he don't wanna say in front of Carl. Michonne looks back an' picks up the mood. She tells Carl to race her to the next sign right up ahead. They take off an' I look to Rick.
"What's up?" He looks ahead at his boy, then faces me.
"Daryl, I've been meanin' to ask you. What do you know of the others? Did you see anybody take off a certain way?" I had really hoped we wouldn't fuckin' get to this yet. I don't even know what the fuck to say.
"I didn't see which way our people headed. I saw Beth an' took her with me. That's all I know." Rick is silent for a minute, probably lettin' it sink in that Beth was with me, now she ain't. I don't want to face that right now.
"Beth didn't make it." He ain't askin' me a question. The words leave a devastation in my mind. But he already knows what it's like . Why should he ask? What are the odds out here? A sweet girl with a fuckin' redneck bastard out in the middle of a world fulla walkers an' psychopaths. Despite all our hopin' an' dreamin', the odds were against us all along. I wipe at my eyes. For some reason, maybe 'cause I trust him, I decide to tell Rick what happened. Just the need-to-know. Shit, how do I even begin to explain my fallin' in love with the farmer's daughter? The farmer we watched get beheaded.
"An' so that's how I ended up with that band of assholes. I chased that damn car all the way to the crossroads. They came up on me. It was do or die, so I stuck with them. But I wanted to get away. I've been thinkin' 'bout nothin' else 'cept lookin' for that damn car. Least, 'til I came 'cross y'all." Rick has been listenin' patiently, he never interrupted me or shown no emotion. When my eyes finally meet his, I see understandin'. If anybody knows how I feel right now, it's him. He went through this just months ago when Lori died. I don't know why, but I still can't bring myself to open that much up to him.
"You did what you had to do to survive. Nobody blames you for that, Daryl." Just as I thought: understandin'. We're gettin' closer to the next sign, Michonne an' Carl are gapin' at it. When we get to them I see what stopped them. Painted on a wall just past the usual Terminus sign was a message.
Glenn go to Terminus
Maggie
Bob Sasha
"Holy shit." It's all I can say. When Rick reads it he starts laughin'. I'd almost laugh myself if I really wanted to. What're the odds that these could be different people? This was a part of our group. Maggie, Sasha an' Bob are together. But where's Glenn? It's obvious that we have to keep goin'. Carl seems excited.
"Can you believe that? It's like we were supposed to all run in to each other the way we did. Michonne found us, we found Daryl, an' now this. We're gonna see everybody once we get to that place."
"Hey, man. If I remember it was me findin' y'all."
We walk a few more miles by the time the sun sets. We decide to rest for the night an' build our strength to head out again tomorrow. I tell them I got first watch. Nobody argues an', before long, they're all out. I'm sittin' back against a tree now, just outta reach of the track where the others sleep. For the first time in days, I feel the smallest bit of hope. We know that others are headed this way. When we get to them, I can get some of us together to find Beth. I refuse to give up on her. I think of her sister, that she's still alive out there. It reminds me of the nights where Beth would say Maggie's name in her sleep. I can only imagine what she woulda felt if she was here with us now. She woulda seen that sign an' told me that it was all hopes an' dreams. I imagine that smile when she would see her proof of her sister still out here. I'm the type of person that would think how long ago it was done was equivalent to the chances of them still bein' alive. Beth would see it as some sign that the world ain't entirely a bad place. Her optimism was refreshin'.
I look over at the other three an' I can't help but have that optimism touch me. The four of us are alive, an' there's a damn good chance at least three others are. Four. Four others; I ain't rulin' out Beth. I won't rule her out. My thoughts are all fucked up. I'm torn between the me that only follows hard facts an' the me that wants to have some hope. I realize that the fight is really between who I used to be an' who I am now. I was the man who never once believed in all that hopin' an' prayin'. If somethin' needed to be done, do it for yourself. Then I let that girl in. She showed me that it was alright to hope for a light at the end of a tunnel. Sometimes you need some of that damn hope just to get you to see the hard facts more clearly. I'm a changed man because of the people I've come to call family. It took Beth to open my eyes to the transformation.
"You gotta stay who you are, not who you used to be."
I see Rick shift as he sits up. He comes over to relieve me. I take my place next to Carl an' Michonne, my eyes close soon's I lay my head down. I dream 'bout a pretty girl with big, blue eyes an' a heart of gold.
We grab our bags an' weapons the minute we get up. The conversation is light. I figure we're all just fuckin' nervous 'bout what we will an' wont find at this fuckin' place. It only takes 'bout half the day to get there, the sun is high in the sky. Terminus is painted 'cross the windows of the building we're facin'. We've made it. This is the place that has been a small bubble of hope at the backs of our minds. We walk up to the gate an' are greeted by a younger guy. I catch sight of the tribal tattoo on his arm as he pulls the gate open.
"Welcome to Terminus. I'm Travis." There's something in his eyes that alerts me, a small feelin' in my gut that don't sit right. But Rick takes his hand in a firm shake, and they all don't seem to pick anything up. Maybe I imagined it. But I quickly scan the area to see what we've walked into. There's buildin's all over. They have a full lot of vehicles. I notice two more men standin' at opposite ends of this fence. I can't shake the feelin' that something's off. But I chalk it up to not bein' 'round a place like this since the prison.
"Come on inside. I'll give you the tour. If you plan on staying, however, those weapons will have to be kept in the armory." They want our weapons? An' they have an armory. I don't know if that's comfortin' or suspicious, but I follow them in, anyways. We walk a little deeper in when Carl suddenly stops in front of me, I nearly knock him down. I follow his gaze to see what the fuck's goin' on. When my eyes catch it, it's the second time in two days I've felt my damn feet lock to the ground. They've seen us, too, an' now they're runnin' to us.
Maggie, Glenn, Sasha an' Bob.
Rick runs to meet them an' throws his arms 'round Maggie. He moves down the line. Takes in Glenn with a one armed hug, claps his hand on Bob's shoulder an' moves on to hug Sasha. It dawns on me that this is real. They're here. It ain't everybody, but it's more of us than we had an hour ago. An' I'll fuckin' take it. We all stand together now, talkin' 'bout who found who, how we've all made it here.
Maggie's cryin' she's so damned happy. I can't make eye contact with her. How can I tell her that her sister was taken 'cause of me? I feel her hand on my forearm an' I look to her face. Her eyes are all shined over with tears an' it's almost too much to look at. She pulls me into a tight embrace, for a moment I tense up. But this is Maggie, an' she ain't ever been one for boundaries an' personal space. She speaks gently in my ear.
"I'm so glad you're alive. I'm glad you found them. You're our family, too, Daryl."
Jesus Christ, I can't take this. What's she gonna say when I tell her 'bout Beth? I hear someone clear their throat an' Maggie lets go of me. I look behind our people to see four more. Two girls, some military lookin' fucker an' some jackass with a mullet. This place is just a regular fuckin' meltin' pot. Glenn speaks now.
"These guys are with us," he points to each as he introduces the new people. "That's Abraham, Eugene, Rosita and Tara. None of us would be standing here if it wasn't for them." Everybody is makin' nice with one another when I glance back over to that Travis guy. He don't seem too pleased that we all know each other, but he looks like he's tryin' to mask that.
What the fuck is this place?