When is the fear of death most prominent for a soldier? When they are in the thick of battle, or simply when they know it is coming?

If there was one thing Ryu missed about Sakura, it was the tank's armor. Granted, a light tank didn't have much to boast about, but compared to a recon unit, it was definitely preferable.

Besides, Ryu was even more acutely aware of this situation as yet another artillery round blasted apart a tree several meters away from his vehicle. Ryu's unit was currently hunkered down in some woods where their location had been compromised by enemy intel. For roughly an hour now, they had been pinned down by blind artillery fire in their area. Thankfully none of the explosive rounds had hit their mark yet, but it was only a matter of time.

For Ryu, who had been suffering from an acute fear of death ever since the incident that had redefined his life, it was nerve-wracking. He for one could not fathom why the enemy would waste so much ammo on eliminating a single unit, but perhaps they realized that allowing enemy scouts to roam about the area was a bad idea.

As for the Yellow Comet unit itself, they were afraid to leave the cover of the woods: the enemy clearly knew they were there somewhere, so they probably had eyes on the area. If they tried to leave they would just compromise their situation further. For that reason they were staying immobile, with camo nets covering their harsh yellow vehicles.

Either way, it was Ryu's job to stay on the line with their CO, who was speaking to him right now.

"Suzukai, has the situation changed in any way?"

"Negative, Commander. The enemy bombardment hasn't let up at all. We've yet to take a hit though... when is that air support getting here ma'am? It's only a matter of time until the enemy gets lucky."

"Don't sound so worried Suzukai. That bomber we scrambled will be on site in just a few more minutes."

"A few minutes is enough time for them to shell the rest of the forest!"

"I cannot make the pilot go any faster Suzukai. Besides, that's hardly true, they've been shelling you for an hour now and you're still alive. Please stay calm. You'll be out of there soon enough. HQ out."

Not at all placated by Sonja's assurances, Ryu angrily tore off his headset as he glanced around the forest at his fellow recon units. There had yet to be another artillery strike, but Ryu was nervously anticipating one. The deathly whistle of incoming explosives dominated his hearing even though there were none to be heard. Every moment he expected to be blown apart by a lucky shot from the enemy, or hit by a piece of shrapnel. It wasn't long before his comrades noticed their gunner's strange behavior.

"Suzukai, are you alright? You're breathing really heavily."

"I-I'm fine..."

"You sure? You're gettin' really pale too."

"I said I was fine! I just... I need to stretch my legs! I'll be back..."

Trying to do whatever he could to take his mind off of thoughts of death, Ryu climbed out of his vehicle to walk around just a little bit. While it was true that he was more exposed to shrapnel outside of the jeep, he couldn't stand sitting still and waiting for more attacks. He had to at least move around a little.

With that in mind the scarred young man set his sights on a particular tree ahead of him, telling himself that he would just walk to it and then back to his unit. It was but a mere twenty feet, so he reached the stalwart tree soon enough, and Ryu found that his short walk was helping to calm his nerves somewhat. Unfortunately that did not last long, as the very real scream of an incoming explosive round entered Ryu's ears once again.

Immediately paralyzed with fear, Ryu was unable to sprint back to his jeep for protection even though his brain told him to. He couldn't even drop to the ground to minimize his chances of getting hit by shrapnel.

"Suzukai, get back here! Come on!"

To his own surprise, the voice of his comrades put Ryu's body into motion. Running on training and instinct more than thought, the soldier took three steps towards his jeep before the explosive shell from the skies above smashed into the earth below it in a ball of fire, metal, and dirt. Landing somewhere in front of Ryu, he felt himself launched backwards by the shock wave of the blast, smashing him into the tree he had just visited.

Deafened by the blast and too shocked to react immediately regardless, Ryu rolled around on the ground for a few moments as he tried to get his bearings. It wasn't until his hearing returned that he managed to get some idea of what had just occurred, as the alarmed voices of Foxtrot Seven-Seven's other members reached him.

"Shit, we got nailed! Shit! Fuck!"

"Stop screaming and check for survivors dammit"

Somehow getting to his hands and knees despite the way his body was shaking, Ryu laid eyes on the remains of his jeep, which had moments ago housed two of his fellow soldiers. The vehicle was now nothing more than a piece of wreckage home to mangled bodies, as it had taken a direct hit from Black Hole's artillery.

Too stunned to point out to his comrades that he was still alive, Ryu merely gazed on the scene of devastation with one thought in his mind.

That was almost me. That would have been me if I hadn't gotten out, or if I had taken longer to decide to get out. That could have been my grave...

Acting on autopilot now more than anything else, Ryu shakily rose to his feet and approached the decimated yellow steel before him. All the while, he could not ignore the fact that he had just escaped death by mere chance. The thought of his survival being dependent on luck hit him more heavily than he would have expected.

He was so stunned by the realization that the sound of explosions in the distance was hardly registered. Apparently Sonja's air support had finally arrived on the scene. There was some sort of radio transmission from one of the other Yellow Comet jeeps, at which point Ryu found himself being ushered towards one of the surviving vehicles by his comrades.

He was seated in the backseat of the lead recon unit as it was thrown into motion, but Ryu didn't hear where they were going. All he knew was that he had once again cheated death through mere chance, and that such luck couldn't last forever.

Sonja, while genuinely worried about the fate that had befallen Foxtrot Seven-Seven, was unable to abandon her post to check on them, or more specifically Ryu, even as they arrived back at base following their ordeal. After all, she still had many scouts in the field, and she was responsible for them as well.

That being the case, she was completely occupied with their operations until every unit had managed to return to base, several hours after Seven-Seven's own return. At that point she was finally able to receive a report on Ryu's unit from its squad leader. Sonja had been alarmed to discover that the annihilated jeep had been Ryu's, but she had been subsequently relieved to find that the gunner had miraculously survived due to absence from the vehicle at its time of destruction. Unfortunately that left the unit with two casualties, which weighed on the girl heavily. She had grown to detest writing condolences for fallen soldiers.

Nevertheless, she was immediately concerned with Ryu alone. After all, he was still alive to be worried about, unlike his fallen comrades. For this reason she asked the squad leader about his condition.

"The gunner who survived, how is he? Injured in any way?"

The older man seemed uncomfortable in the command post Sonja had summoned him into: he wasn't used to being surrounded by non-combatant soldiers, or the equipment they used. Even so, he managed to answer his CO's question sufficiently.

"He wasn't directly injured by the blast; no shrapnel or burns or anything. But he hasn't said a single word since shell hit. He looked pretty shocked, which is understandable... I don't know ma'am. He just wasn't right. I don't know how else to put it."

"Is he in the field hospital now?"

"As far as I know."

With a sigh, Sonja nodded. "Very well. Dismissed. I will see to replacing your losses before your next deployment."

The man bowed as he turned to leave Sonja's command building, leaving the young girl to question what she was going to do about this situation. She was now positive that Ryu was suffering from a psychological issue after this incident, but her skill level in such areas had not changed since last time. She still didn't know how to offer assistance.

Should I simply speak to him? Perhaps convince him to share his thoughts? But what then? Besides, I'm not qualified for this nor is it really my concern as a commander...

Kanbei's daughter scowled at her own thoughts. No, it is my concern. He is my soldier, I am his commander... more than anyone else on this base his health is my concern. Even if I do not deal with it myself I must still ensure that he receives proper treatment. But this is a mere field outpost, there is no one to offer psychiatric assistance here... I could send him to a city for aid, but that would only delay the help he needs even further. No, it falls to me to at least offer some form of assistance.

With a nod to herself, Sonja turned command of the module over to one of her lieutenants, completely oblivious to her own desire to help Ryu on a personal level rather than a logical one. Perhaps such concepts were just so alien to her that she couldn't recognize them in herself.

That being the case, Sonja convinced herself that this was all purely rational action as she headed for the field hospital located closer to the center of the division's outpost. Even as she reached it, she still viewed the issue in the same light.

After stepping in, Sonja quickly spotted the man she was looking for simply sitting near the front on a fold-out chair. She was initially surprised by his location, but after a moment of thought, Sonja dispelled the confusion. After all, the medics here could only adequately deal with physical injuries, so what were they supposed to do?

That being the case, no one was really paying attention to the man, whose stoic face was bandaged as always. Sonja briefly wondered how well the man's scars had healed at this point, but she knew better than to bring it up. Even so, she had no idea how to initiate a conversation. Should she just be purely logical and state that the deaths of his comrades was lamentable? That seemed much too harsh, even to a rational thinker like her.

Then again, maybe she didn't have to bring it up at all. "Suzukai... would you like to walk with me?"

The scarred soldier said nothing even though he looked up at the dark haired girl before him. He stared at her for a few moments before silently nodding to her, at which point he stood up to follow her out of the field hospital.

Sonja was glad that he offered no resistance to this by now common exercise for them, but was nevertheless worried about his silence. She still didn't know what to say, so as the two of them slowly toured the small outpost they were temporarily calling home, with Sonja simply hoping that Ryu would speak first. If he decided not to, she would consider taking a different approach.

She grew increasingly worried that she may have to do exactly that as the man moved beside her in complete silence for nearly fifteen minutes, but thankfully the oppressive quiet eventually brought some muttered words out of the man.

"Why me..."

Glad to have made a breakthrough of sorts, Sonja capitalized on the moment, pretending she hadn't heard the man as clearly as she had in hopes of eliciting more out of him. "Hm?"

"Why am I still alive when those other guys aren't? Why me instead of Baek or Shen? It's not fair..."

"Not fair that you survived?"

Ryu shook his head, ignoring Sonja's question. It was almost as if he had forgotten she was there. "Is it all some sort of game? How close can we come to killing him without killing him? Is some higher power screwing with me on purpose, or is it all just chance? Some roll of the dice that directed that shell just far enough away to avoid killing me, but killing those two guys instead? What the hell... what the fuck!"

Startled by his very unexpected outrage, Sonja had no room to say anything at all before Ryu could continue. "Is that all this is?! Some sort of twisted game of chance?! Roll a three and I die, roll a six and my friends do?! Even worse than that, my entire life hinges on what, which direction the wind blows when a bullet comes my way?! Whether or not I get out of a vehicle to stretch? What the hell is a soldier's life even worth if it can end because of such minor shit?!"

Sonja briefly contemplated interrupting Ryu's tirade, but she was afraid that intervening now would only cause him to close up again. Regardless of how explosive he was about it, Ryu was divulging his feelings, which was good. Letting all of this out to someone could have improved his situation.

"It's fucking bullshit! Why... why do I get to live when the guys in the jeep got blown away? It's not fair..."

Deciding that now was the time to say something, Sonja hoped that the words she spoke didn't seem too callous. "War isn't fair, Suzukai..."

"What?"

"Human conflict where innocent civilians suffer because of the grudges of their leaders... war isn't fair. People are forced to die to protect their homes from the greed of others. Mothers lose sons, daughters their fathers... there's nothing fair about it, but that's what war is."

Ryu gazed down at the ground. "Hell..."

"Hell on earth, indeed. But even so, I'm not one to talk... I don't know the horror of war like you do. For me it will forever remain something I experience second-hand."

Not feeling at all comforted by Sonja's assessment, Ryu simply stared ahead, further dismayed by the fact that his troubles could not truly be understood by so many. But it turned out Sonja was not done, as she stopped to intently focus on her companion.

"Ryu. As I just said, I cannot understand your suffering on the level you need me to. But I want you to know that I truly appreciate your sacrifice... and the sacrifice of your comrades. That you would be brave enough to give everything of yourselves to protect others is... a courage I wish I had myself. Because for all of my talents and skills, I don't... I don't think I could do what you do. I don't have the bravery."

While he could not deny that he enjoyed hearing Sonja's praise, Ryu found that he did not like hearing her speak ill of herself for some reason. "That's... that's not entirely true... it takes bravery to bear the responsibility of others' lives... it may be a different kind of bravery, but it is bravery all the same, isn't it?"

Despite his efforts, Sonja said nothing, instead settling for a very vague look that Ryu couldn't identify. "I... suppose I just said something stupid, huh?"

While he had expected some sort of confirmation, Ryu was surprised to see Sonja smile. "Hardly. I daresay you may be better at this than I am..."

Despite his rather dour mood, Ryu managed to smile back, though, as always, his burn scar elicited some pain in his face. "I don't think so... I mean, I'm glad you said what you did. Knowing that someone... well, knowing that you specifically appreciate us, and me... it makes it a little more worthwhile. Sometimes it's easy for us soldiers to think our Commanders only think of us as pawns. It's comforting to know that it's not true."

Sonja nodded. "I assure you that my soldiers are not pawns." Not anymore, she thought bitterly.

Now feeling somewhat better, mostly because he was simply ignoring the thoughts that had plagued him a few minutes ago, Ryu mindlessly stroked his bandage. "Commander, when do you think this war will be over? Anytime soon?"

The girl beside him sighed. "It depends. Orange Star pushed back the invaders already, but then again, they faced the weakest of Black Hole's forces. Blue Moon is faring well so far, and our own forces are in stalemate. Honestly, Green Earth is suffering the most: they're being crushed by Black Hole's strongest armies. So in a complete sense, the theater of war seems to be in our favor... but if Black Hole finishes up with Green Earth, they'll redistribute their strongest forces across the rest of the theater, and we'll all be in trouble. After all, Green Earth has the world's strongest military... if they are defeated who knows how difficult the war will become."

"Well that's not exactly what I wanted to hear... is there a plan?"

"Only for us to win the war on our own front as quickly as possible so that we may support Green Earth's campaign. Without them a crushing counterattack is unlikely at best. Above all we need their Air Force, which is unparalleled, at least among allied forces."

Ryu scowled. "So even when Yellow Comet is free of invaders, it still won't be over..."

"I'm afraid it will never be over until we find and kill Sturm. He has yet to show himself in this conflict, but there is no doubt that he is ultimately in charge... as for Green Earth, it is not as if we will have to help them alone. Orange Star suffered very few casualties throughout their own campaign, and are even now supporting Blue Moon's efforts. It's understood that once they've secured their own front they will help us do the same. Then we'll all liberate Green Earth together. No matter who's in charge, Black Hole will be no match for our combined forces."

"Great, but... none of that answered my question."

Sonja cocked an eye brow at him in confusion, but it was only temporary. "Ah, yes, an estimate on when the war will be over. Well, as I said such an approximation would be quite varied... should we encounter a Black Hole stronghold that requires an extensive siege, the war could carry on for much longer than any of us desire. Then again, it's entirely feasible that we will crush the enemy with ease once our forces are combined. However, I find that unlikely. If I had to make an educated guess, the war will last nine months at the absolute minimum. At most, probably three years. Realistically, probably a year and a half, win or lose. It all depends on the abilities of our commanders and the spirit of our forces."

Ryu folded his arms as he smirked sardonically at the sky above. "So, equal responsibility for us regular soldiers, huh? Guess we all have to do our part..."

Though Sonja knew what she was about to say was not entirely true, she managed to put a false smile on her face. "Well, with dedicated soldiers like you on the front, I'm sure this war will be over before we know it."

Though Ryu smiled back, he knew Sonja was simply trying to raise his spirits. But even though he knew that, he appreciated the notion, just as he appreciated the rest of his walk with the dark-haired young woman beside him.

I always wondered how long the AW2 war technically lasted. I mean, some of those battles take you around a month. If you tally up your campaign scores, how long was the conflict? Guess it depends on how good of a player you are. Or rather or not in game these battles were all going on at the same time.