***EDITED***

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And here it is! The 50th chapter milestone. I hope you all enjoy it, I couldn't have gotten here without your kind words and support. You guys rock! Let me know what you think. Here's to 50 more!

;)

I grab up my bow an' we head out, her hand in mine. I can remember when I preferred to hunt alone. It was quiet an' I had time to think to myself. An' I could concentrate more on killin' somethin' when I weren't worryin' 'bout the person next to me. But it ain't like that no more with Beth. I like havin' her out here.

Late fall's usually when squirrels an' deer are most active. Squirrels are gatherin' food for winter an' it's matin' season for deer. We walk silently through the woods an' I can see spots where the ground's been scraped at. Few trees have rub marks from antlers. Best thing 'bout rut's the bucks don't pay much mind to anything other than matin'. They get careless an' they're easier to hunt an' kill.

"Might find us a deer."

I keep my voice low. Beth's at my side an' I see her nod. She knows you gotta be quiet out here. I see fresh signs of our prey an' I take us in that direction. Ain't too long 'fore I get us on a good trail an' I stop to hand her my bow. She takes it without question an' I watch as she picks up where I left off.

She keeps her eyes to the ground, lookin' up only to make sure she don't walk into nothin'. I keep my mouth shut. She's doin' just fine on her own an' I'm damn proud of her. After a while, we hear movement ahead of us. She walks further out an' I stand back. The brush ahead of her shakes an' a buck steps out. He ain't big, but he's enough to feed the whole camp. I watch as she slowly raises the bow. From here, her stance's perfect. I hold my breath when I hear the bolt release.

"Good thing we ain't too far out. Bastard's heavier than he looks."

She laughs at me. I been draggin' her buck through the woods. Camp ain't much farther from here. She goes to a fallen tree an' sits down. I drop my grip on the animal an' sit next to her. She takes a drink from our water bottle an' hands it to me. It soothes the dry ache in my throat, but it's real warm. What I'd give for a cold glass of water.

"The others won't believe I killed it."

I watch her pull her knife offa her hip. She turns it in her hands an' I smile at her. The girl's picked up a lotta shit from me.

"Course they'll know you killed it. It's the truth."

Her eyes flick up to me an' I can see she's workin' somethin' out in her head. She stops turnin' the knife, starts bitin' at her bottom lip. I can't believe she'd actually be worried over them thinkin' I made the shot. She sighs an' her eyes fall to the ground.

"I know about Jesse."

She looks back up to me. There's only one thing she could mean by that. That jackass musta told her the truth, tryin' to get us to argue. I can't believe I fell for his nice guy shit, I try harder to accept people at their word an' this is what happens. Just fell on my own fuckin' sword thinkin' he'd come through for me eventually. I knew I shouldn't lie to her. I shoulda come right out an' told her 'bout the boy. I feel my skin crawl, my stomach turns. I bring my hand to my mouth, chew on my nail while I try to think of how to keep this from bein' another fight. Her hand reaches up to mine an' pulls it away from my lips. She squeezes gently.

"I know why you didn't tell me the truth, Daryl. That was very sweet of you."

I hadn't realized how tense my body was. I feel my muscles loosen up an' I sigh. I'd thought he woulda turned it on me. Figured he'd use my poor judgement to his advantage. "What all'd he say?"

"He told me about the walker in the store an' about his brother. He said I shouldn't be mad at you for not tellin' me that, figured you did it to keep us from leavin' him behind."

I nod. That's exactly why I'd done it. I know how important it is to be ready for anything out here. You gotta let go of what things used to be like so you could survive. I didn't know what Rick or the others woulda said if they knew he hadn't just lied to us, but that he'd also proven he ain't capable of takin' care of hisself.

Part of me thinks I just understand the role of the black sheep. In the beginnin' of all this, I woulda never been someone they'd look to for answers. I was all muscle an' huntin'. Carol once told me I was Rick's henchman, but I don't think that's entirely true. Rick's got a way of seein' what people's strengths are an' he puts 'em to use. He's a smart guy an' a damn good leader. I find myself hopin' he'll see somethin' useful in Jesse.

I feel her squeeze my hand again. She leans in an' kisses my cheek. When I look into her eyes, I think of what they was all talkin' 'bout on the road. Holidays an' time. 'Bout us all bein' a real family. I think of what it'd be like to get up north. It's a stupid thought, but I try to imagine what a real Christmas could be like. If we get there in time for that, it'd be my first one. A warm feelin' spreads through me at the thought of my first Christmas bein' with Beth. It'll be like that book she read to me, the one with the heartless man.

Sittin' out here with her, thinkin' 'bout families an' holidays, I realize I can't be completely heartless. Somewhere deep down inside me, there's good. She sees it, points it out often. It's terrifyin' to let someone in, 'specially when you spent all your life battlin' your demons alone. It's fuckin' exhaustin'. But Beth don't want me to fight it alone. That girl's in love with me an' she sees herself savin' me. I begin to think maybe she already has.

"I really wanna get to D.C."

Her eyes shine brightly at my words. I surprise myself at my own admission. But it's the truth. I been thinkin' 'bout it the entire time we been out here huntin'. Her an' the others keep hopeful of what we're gonna find an' I been hopin' for it, too. She reaches up an' kisses my cheek.

"I said it before, I knew you believed in good people. Washington's gonna be wonderful, Daryl. I just know it."

I look ahead to the trees. She's set on this bein' our new home. An' it has to be. We all been pushin' ourselves to get there. Our group's lost an' gained people. I know we're a good group. In the back of my mind, I remember what Gabriel said in the kitchen. How he saw somethin' dark in us. But he was wrong. We're good people. An' I have to believe there's gonna be good people where we're headed.

"I know."

I stand, helpin' her to her feet an' we set back off to the road, trailin' her deer behind us.

The others were almost as proud of Beth as I was. But we had bigger problems than meat. Rick pulled me aside an' said we needed to figure out vehicles. I walk over to Jesse, but Beth steps in fronta me.

"If you're goin' out searchin', I'm goin' with you."

I'd only meant for me an' Jesse to go. Figured we could take both bikes an' head up to that store again an' search the lot. But I know I'd rather go with Beth. We could just take one bike. Won't matter anyways if we can get least two cars. I hold my hand up to her an' get over to him.

"Jesse, you ever skin a deer 'fore?"

He glances down to the buck. "I used to help my brother skin his. You need me to do it?"

"Yeah. Me an' Beth are headin' back to that store to look for vehicles. Figured you could skin an' clean it. Carol can start a fire an' it should be done by the time we get back. Think you can manage that?"

He grabs his bag an' pulls out the knives we'd found yesterday. "Yeah, I think I can do that."

I leave him to it an' go to grab my bag outta our tent, swappin' my bow for my gun. Beth follows me, grabbin' her own bag. Figure we might find shit in whatever cars we can't start. I tell Rick we're headin' out an' to make sure Jesse gets that deer cleaned up right. After I help Beth on the back of the bike, I start it up an' we take off down the road.

It don't take too long to get there, probably 'cause I weren't exactly goin' slow. Beth sets her helmet on the seat an' we make our way through the cars. After the first one won't start, the second one ain't got no gas. Beth's hands fall to her sides an' she puffs out.

"This is ridiculous! If we find one that starts, it's got no gas. If we find one with gas, it won't start. We're never gonna catch a break!"

I process her words in my head an' that's when it hits me. I can't believe it's taken me all day to think of it. I hop outta the car an' slam the door.

"C'mon. Look for gas cans in any of the trucks. Even better if we can also find a hose, but I reckon there's some of those in the store."

She smiles ear to ear when she realizes my plan. We're gonna just siphon gas an' carry the cans back to the vans. We'd be stupid to think we'll find big enough vehicles to carry all of us that not only start, but also got full tanks. I walk over to a beaten truck, only to come up short. But I find a pretty decent rope an' hand it to her. "Can use that to tie the cans to the bike."

I'm hopeful that we'll even find any. I see a service truck a little ways down an' my hopes pick up higher. If there's gonna be cans anywhere, it's there. I get over to it an' nearly laugh out when I see two cans sittin' there. I grab 'em up an' take 'em back to our bike. "Let's go see if we can find a hose."

We walk through the broken glass an' Beth turns on her flashlight. She looks up to the signs for the gardenin' section. Reckon it's further in the back. So we walk through the store to get there. Her light flashes over the empty shelves. "You think they'll be any hoses left?"

"Don't exactly figure people were runnin' out needin' hoses for the end of the world, Beth."

She laughs at me an' I can't help but laugh, too. But I remember where we are. We don't know what else could be in here with us. I tell her we gotta keep it down an' focus on findin' what we came in for. Even in what little light we got, I can see her roll her eyes.

The garden section don't look like too many people searched it. I almost imagine it don't look different than it had when the world changed. Only things missin' are the shovels an' other tools. People only considered weapons when they ransacked these places. Not many thought of what you'd need after you got done defendin' yourself. I see a whole box fulla vegetable seeds. I drop my bag to the ground an' dump the packets in there. Maybe they got a place for crops in D.C.

Beth walks a little ways ahead of me, but comes back with what we'd been lookin' for. We head back outside an' I pull out my knife. I twist off the metal lip of the hose an' cut it down to 'bout three feet. I cut another section the same length, roll it up an' put it in my bag. Never know when we'd need a second. I grab the cans offa the bike an' we walk to the first car we see.

I pop open the fuel tank door an' twist off the cap. I stick one end of the hose in, dippin' it down an' pullin' it out to see if we got gas. Sure's shit, there's some in there. I bring the end of the hose to my mouth but Beth pulls it away.

"You can't be serious?"

"How else you reckon we get the gas out?"

"I understand the process, Daryl. What I don't understand is how you think it's safe to suck up that gas when you light up cigarettes all day. The fumes?"

I sit back on my heels. I hadn't thought of that. Fact, I don't even know if it's really a risk. But 'fore I can try to argue she pulls the hose outta my hand an' drops to her knees. I shouldn't let her do this, I doubt she knows what she's doin'. I can't help but stare as she hollows her cheeks an' begins to suck the gasoline up. She places her fingers over the openin' an' I watch her pull the hose out a little ways, shovin' the end in the gas can. I'm surprised when I hear the liquid hit the surface an' I smile at her.

She gets all she can from that car an' we move to the next. I feel stupid at how I'm watchin' her do this. It ain't just how she does it or how she looks doin' it, not like that at all. It's the fact that she can. That she knows what it means to survive out here an' she's willin' to do what it takes. It ain't long 'fore we fill up both cans, an' I'm relieved this trip didn't take half the time I'd thought it would. I'm leaned back in the front of a car, finishin' a cigarette an' she's layin' 'cross the back seat. I hear her sigh.

"You know, once we get on the road again it's gonna be a while before we get any time alone."

I shift in my seat so's I can turn to face her. The grin she gives me is all too familiar. I smile as I get outta the car, put out my cigarette an' climb in the back seat with her. She pulls off her boots an' jeans an' straddles my lap. When she pulls off her shirt, I kiss an' suck at her neck. She picks up her bag, settin' it in what little space we got between us. I play with the end of her braid as she digs through to find us a condom. I nod down to the bag. "We got many of 'em left?"

She counts what's in the box. "Nine outta twelve. We're really slackin'."

Her lips fall to mine as she laughs. I hold her face between my hands, gently bite down on her lip. My tongue parts her mouth further as she sighs an' she tilts her head down to give herself to me. I feel the smile on her lips an' I love how carefree she is. Just weeks ago I woulda never even considered climbin' in the back of some stranded car with her for a quick fuck. The thought woulda scared me to death, bringin' up dark reminders of a hauntin' past. But she's changed me.

Hearin' her talk 'bout us the way she had earlier opened me up to this. For a while, I figured I was the best option in a bad situation. I knew she loved me, but I'd only figured it was 'cause she weren't left with many other choices. But she'd talked like she woulda loved nothin' more than to have me sit with her family an' pass food down the table, like I was part of whatever she had.

Her hands work at my jeans as I continue to kiss her. Her small hand wraps 'round me an' I groan. She starts to move, tightenin' her grip enough to make my head fall back as I moan out her name. My own hand grips 'round her wrist to stop her an' I take the condom she'd set on the seat. She sits back an' stares down at me as I put it on. She bites down on her bottom lip an' I don't think she ever looked prettier than she did lowerin' herself onto me. My breath hisses through my teeth at the feelin'.

"Jesus, Beth."

She's movin' above me, her breathin's faster an' she digs her nails into the tops of my shoulders. I grip her hips, guidin' her rhythm. The dreamcatcher bounces with her chest. Her eyes hold mine an' I feel lost in 'em. For once, I don't wanna look away.

I'd always thought of her as a pretty girl, even back when I first met her on their farm. Nothin' I woulda ever done 'bout it then. She'd just been somethin' nice to look at when the world 'round me looked like hell. But I wasn't willin' to think of what she coulda really been. An' she was only sixteen when we'd met. That was more than enough to control my thoughts.

When she'd opened me up at that shack, I'd seen how beautiful she was. Everything 'bout her drew me in once I realized she's what I'd needed all these years. At first, it felt wrong. I'd battled with myself thinkin' that she was still just a girl. She'd already turned eighteen by then. So it weren't too much the fact that I was twice her age.

Part of me felt disgusted that I could ever look at Hershel's daughter that way. Sure, he'd told me plenty of times how he thought I was good, but that don't mean he woulda welcomed the idea of me an' his youngest girl bein' the way we are now. But Maggie accepted us bein' together, so I tell myself he woulda done the same.

What really worried me most was myself. I'd been so afraid of her realizin' I weren't any good. I knew what I'd been like. It ate away at me to think I could ever pull her into the dark. I was only just startin' to see the light myself. Bein' with her like this terrified me. But she always tells me I'm good, says she knows I am. So it ain't like that no more.

"I love you."

Her voice is gentle as her fingers move down the muscles of my biceps. I pull her face to mine, my hand runs down to the back of her neck an' I hold her close. In such a small space, it's almost too much. All's I can smell's her hair an' the sweat on her skin. I only hear the sounds she makes as she whimpers an' moans. The only thing I feel's her flesh against mine. I drop my lips to the base of her throat an' gently bite down.

Her nails scratch down my chest. I watch as she arches her back, her hand reaches to the headrest of the passenger seat an' she tilts herself away from me. She whimpers at the way it feels now, an' I run my hand up her smooth, flat stomach to her bra.

"Oh, Daryl..."

It's all I needa hear. My hand wraps 'round her back an' I work at the clasp. She pulls the bra away from her body an' tosses it down on the floor with the rest of her clothes. I lean up to meet her an' kiss her lips roughly, completely lost in this moment. She sighs against my mouth an' I move my lips down to her chin, kissin' an' gently bitin' at her jaw. I get to her neck an' open my mouth slightly to taste her. The soft skin's salty from her sweat an' I run my tongue down to the base of her throat. I feel myself smirk against her skin as she moans out again. I pull away from her an' gently tilt her back further. I keep one hand at her hip an' the other 'round her back. She smiles down at me, her voice breathy. "Daryl, what-"

I kiss the skin of her stomach an' move my lips up. She stops speakin' an' sighs. I graze my teeth over her breast, bitin' softly to get her to respond to me again. It's a beautiful sound to hear her say my name the way she does like this. I run my hand from her hip, up her side an' take her other one in my hand. She bucks against me when I roughly rub my thumb over her nipple an' whimpers as I continue. Her hips move faster an' I growl out as I move my mouth to her shoulder an' bite down.

At first, I knew exactly what this was: her fuckin' me in the back of a car. But it ain't. I realize somethin' I shoulda known all along: she's mine an' I'm hers. We even each other out an' we're stronger for it. Beth's the only woman who coulda ever had me like this. An' I've only ever belonged to her.

She pushes herself against me harder, finally sighin' my name one last time. I tighten my grip 'round her back, pull her closer to me. My forehead rests against hers as I thrust my hips faster. We're both pantin' an' I feel everything inside an' out tighten as I spill myself into the rubber. Her mouth covers mine as I growl an' moan out at my own release. We sit there for just a moment, I run my hands over her back. She reaches for her clothes an' hops offa me an' I toss the condom up to the front seat. I open the car door, readjustin' my jeans an' zippin' back up. Holdin' my hand out to her, I pull her outta the car an' flat against me. I kiss the top of her head.

"I love you, Beth."

I pick up the gas cans an' my bag an' we head back to the bike. Once I've tied the cans up best I could, we head back to camp. It's a slower ride this time. I don't want the cans of gas to fall off. It takes twice as long to get back an' when we do I can smell the meat cookin'.

Abraham's standin' with his back to the camp an' he looks angry.

"Fuck! You mean to tell me there's not one fuckin' car out there y'all could've started?"

Beth an' me get offa the bike an' I hold up the cans. The smile he gives me tells me that we're gonna be alright. As I head over to start fillin' the first tank, I show Rick what we got. He looks relieved an' I swear it's the first time I seen him smile in days.

"Let's eat so's we can head out."

We've been drivin' all night. Glenn said North Carolina's just a little ways up the road. Daryl's arms wrap 'round me as I lay back against his chest. I can feel my eyes gettin' heavy, but I told myself I had to stay awake long enough to know when we cross the line. It's somethin' I'd decided earlier.

I remember how it felt to cross into South Carolina. I knew that had been much different since it was us leavin' Georgia. But now that I think of how close we are, I realize I can't be sad when we move through the next few states. This is what we've been movin' towards for a while now. An' it's gonna be everything we need.

The past hour's been hard to keep my eyes open. But Maggie looks out her window an' tells us we just got into North Carolina. I try to smile but can't fight past a yawn. I feel Daryl's lips fall to my ear.

"You can go to sleep, now, Beth."

I smile to myself. I hadn't told him why I was stayin' awake, yet he'd known the whole time. He really does understand me. I close my eyes an' think of our conversation earlier. I picture us all sittin' together as a family. In Washington we can have holidays an' special occasions. We can really have a life there. Me an' Daryl can have a real life together. The last thought I have as I go to sleep is how he'd admitted to wanting to get to our safe haven.

"Washington's gonna be wonderful, Daryl. I just know it."

"I know."