Disclaimer: See Chapter 1
Chapter 6: Irreplaceable
2D yawned sleepily. He could feel the morning sunlight passing through his eyelids, but rather than face the day, he squeezed his eyes shut in protest and curled himself around the warm lump of covers he had been spooning in his sleep. When an alarm began ringing from his bedside table, he moaned and buried his head under the blankets, attempting in vain to shield himself from the offending sound.
The blankets shifted on their own accord, and after a moment of bleary confusion, the singer remembered that he wasn't alone. He could feel Noodle's small frame twisting in his arms as she stretched her muscles. She broke free of his grasp, and 2D could sense her leaning over him before the alarm shut off and a voice whispered in his ear.
"Wake up, sleepyhead. You can't help me do research in your sleep."
Refusing to open his eyes, 2D moaned, "I don't wanna get up. Can't I sleep in for just another hour?"
Noodle sighed. "Well, I guess if you want me to do all of the research by myself, all alone, with no one to help me and keep me company-"
"Alright, alright!" 2D groaned as he cracked open his eyes and found Noodle staring down at him with a grin.
"Good. I'm going to run downstairs and start breakfast. You can meet me down there after you've taken a shower." Noodle hopped out of bed and skipped to the door, flashing 2D one last smile before leaving the room.
2D sat up, whimpering regretfully as the warm covers fell off his body. Looking down at himself, the singer realized that he was still wearing his clothes from the night before. Yeah, I could really use a shower…
. . .
Ten minutes later, 2D relaxed as hot water fell across his skin and steam filled the air. The singer closed his eyes so that he could forget about the sorry state of the grimy bathroom, the moldy greenish stains on the floor and the ragged gray tarp that passed as a temporary shower curtain until they could go shopping for a decent one. As he squeezed a pool of butterscotch-scented shampoo into his hand, he found himself thinking about the day to come. On one hand, he was excited. He would be spending most of the day with Noodle who, in 2D's opinion, was one of the most fun people in the world to spend time with. Stuart smiled as he rubbed the sweet-smelling shampoo into his hair.
On the other hand, they would be researching the house. 2D was afraid of what they might find out in the process. What if they went looking for secret rooms, and found where the monsters lived? What if the spirits got mad at them for being nosy, and tried to kill them?
Stay calm, stay calm, 2D chanted to himself as he felt his panic rising. He swept a soapy washcloth across his face, wishing that the cloth could wipe away his fear. Noodle will be with me, and there's nothing that she can't handle. Besides, she's hunted demons before. She knows how to do this, and how to be careful. We'll all be fine.
Soon, 2D finished cleaning himself and shut the water off. He dried himself quickly, dressed in a pale pink T-shirt and jeans, and tousled his hair as he left the bathroom.
Approaching Russel's room, 2D stepped as lightly as he could so that the floorboards wouldn't creak and wake his sleeping bandmate. This was probably unnecessary since the rumble of Russel's loud snoring was echoing through the whole top floor of the house. Sounds like Russ won't be joining us today. 2D gazed sadly at Russel's door as he passed it by. He always seems to be tired these days… I hope he's not sick or anything.
2D descended the stairs and entered the kitchen, where he was greeted by the tantalizing scent of frying eggs and toasted bread. 2D sniffed the air wantonly, only now realizing just how hungry he was, then turned his black eyes towards Noodle, who was attending to the sizzling eggs. She too had changed clothes and was now wearing a black-and-white striped T-shirt with jeans. She turned toward the singer with a smile. "The eggs will be ready soon. Could you go grab the mail while I finish this?"
"Sure thing, Noods," 2D replied.
In another minute, Noodle was sitting at the small, set table while 2D entered the room, shuffling through a handful of different-sized envelopes.
"This one's from our old landlord at Wobble street; she probably wants paid back for damages to the property. Here's one from a Billy Bobkins, I think he's that crazy fan who was always sending us letters at Wobble street. I wonder how he got our new address so quickly… This one's for you, it's from 'Motorcycles Incorporated.'"
"Ooh!" Noodle exclaimed, excited. "Let me see that!" As she accepted her mail and skimmed through it eagerly, 2D continued to sift through the remaining envelopes. A bill from their movers, A welcome letter from the local homeowner's association, A coupon for a Chinese takeout eatery…
The final item was a postcard. "Lincolnshire" was written in bold letters atop an image of an old cathedral-type building with tall spires. 2D flipped the card over to observe the sender.
"Cyborg's sent us a postcard," 2D told Noodle, who looked up from her reading with an expression of tense discomfort. 2D understood her feelings; Noodle and her replica had never had many normal interactions. In fact, they had only faced each other twice, and each time had concluded with some sort of violent or disturbing action. The first meeting had resembled a fight to the death, in which Noodle had battled fiercely with her unwanted replacement and ended up hitting the cyborg so hard that she had broken and deactivated. After that encounter, Murdoc had repaired his bodyguard in secret and ordered the cyborg to hide out of sight when the other band members were around. Little did he know, the Cyborg had taken to spying on real Noodle, and was coming to the conclusion that a second confrontation would be necessary to settle a score with her flesh and blood counterpart.
2D thought back to that day…
The four of them, Murdoc, Russel, Noodle, and himself, were lounging on the steps of their Wobble street home just days after they had all reunited. The sun was sinking into the horizon, casting shades of orange and gold into the sky. His bandmates laughed as 2D regaled them with the tale of how he had found a beach rave after thinking that he was stranded on a desert island. As the laughter died down, 2D became aware of the sound of footsteps coming from inside the house. "Did someone invite a friend over? I don't remember anyone else being here."
"Oh, it's probably just Noodle's cat," Murdoc replied disinterestedly.
"It can't be Katsu," Noodle said. "He's too small to make that sort of noise. He usually doesn't make a sound."
"Murdoc," Russel groaned," did you bring some girl home from the bar last night and forget about her?"
"No, I did not!" Murdoc claimed, but 2D noticed that the bassist's fingers were fidgeting, and he kept glancing nervously at the door as the steps grew louder and closer. "But I suppose I'll check anyway, just to make sure-"
Murdoc was about to stand when the door opened with a crash. Standing tall in the entryway was none other than the gun-toting Cyborg Noodle.
Real Noodle leaped to her feet instantly, her body tense and her arms raised in a fighting stance. Russel's eyes widened with surprise, and 2D let out a small squeak as he scooted away from the cyborg. Murdoc shot the cyborg an angry glare.
"Cyborg! I told you to stay in the attic!" Murdoc growled.
"I no longer take orders from you," the Cyborg replied in a tone which was simultaneously emotionless and menacing. Murdoc's eyes widened.
"Stop this rubbish!" Murdoc scolded with an edge of panic in his voice. "Cyborg Noodle, you-"
"I am not Cyborg Noodle anymore," The cyborg intoned. She raised her arms, and real Noodle's muscles tightened. 2D yelped as he accidentally scooted over the edge of the stair and fell off into the grass. He stood up just in time to see the Cyborg pull off her head.
He gasped as a shower of sparks burst out of the Cyborg's exposed neck. Real Noodle, motionless with shock, watched open mouthed as the Cyborg approached her and offered her the head.
The cyborg's voice could now be heard coming from somewhere within the sparking neck. "This is your image. It is not my own. I will not accept hand-me-downs anymore."
Real Noodle took the head slowly, and the Cyborg turned to face her former master. "I quit." The Cyborg paused as Murdoc's jaw dropped. He began to stutter out an angry reply, but the Cyborg cut him off. "I have deactivated my membership to Gorillaz and my loyalty to you. I tire of being a replica. Now, it is time for me to set out and create my own identity. You will not call me Cyborg Noodle anymore. Until I choose another name, I am Cyborg." Turning away from the fuming bassist, Cyborg descended the stairs.
Upon reaching the grass, she surprised the band again by turning sharply to face 2D, whose feet shuffled nervously. "2D. You are kind, and you will be my first friend. I will be staying in touch." Cyborg held out a hand.
His nerves subsiding slightly, 2D gingerly accepted Cyborg's hand and shook it. "Ummm… Okay. Have a nice life?"
Its headless neck still shooting sparks, Cyborg turned away and began to walk down the street, into the golden sunset. Suddenly, Murdoc recovered from his speechlessness and angrily shouted after his former slave, "Hey! I am your creator! You can't just make the dullard your friend and leave me with nothing! After all I've done for you, I expect some repayment!"
A hatch opened in Cyborg's back, out of which extended a small missile. "Repayment sequence initiating… Launching in ten seconds… Nine… Eight…"
Murdoc yelped and dove behind the doorway, shutting the door firmly behind him before any of his bandmates could follow. Fortunately, Cyborg ended the launch sequence when her target disappeared. The three remaining bandmates looked on as her silhouette faded into the horizon.
The door cracked open, and Murdoc nervously stuck his head outside. "Is she gone?"
"Yeah, and in case you're interested, the rest of us are safe, no thanks to you!" Russel shouted angrily. "What is it with you and letting your bandmates get blown up? You're sick, man! And were you ever planning to tell us that you'd reactivated a deadly robot with guns hidden in every body part?"
Murdoc rolled his eyes and strutted outside huffily. "Shut up, Russ, I'm going through enough without your yammering. I just lost my servant!"
As the drummer and the bassist argued over who had been wronged more in the past half-hour, Noodle stared uncomfortably down at the sparking head she held in her arms. It was like looking at a mirror, only much creepier, and her arms were starting to sting from the stray sparks which flew out of the dying wires. "Ummm… Murdoc? What do you want me to do with this?"
"I don't care what you do with it, she gave it to you! Satan forbid my creation and servant leave me with anything to remember her by! For all I care, you can hollow it out and plant a bloody tree inside of it! I don't care!" With that said, Murdoc (who 2D suspected cared a little more than he was letting on) stormed back into the house.
Thus concluded the last time 2D, or any other member of Gorillaz, had seen Cyborg face-to-face. As promised, however, 2D received regular correspondence from his 'friend.' At first, 2D hadn't known what to make of Cyborg's continued association. After all, she hadn't exactly been good company on Plastic Beach; Murdoc had usually ordered her to act cruelly towards him. Soon enough though, 2D realized that Cyborg was a very amicable correspondent when not under the influence of Murdoc's orders, and he accepted that Cyborg was turning a new leaf.
Back in the kitchen at the Spirit House, 2D read the postcard aloud so that Noodle could hear:
"Dear 2D,
"I've settled down in Lincolnshire for now. The landlord of my apartment building has allowed me to stay for free as long as I stay in the basement and let the other residents use my Wi-Fi signal. I met a nice mechanic named Henry; he repairs me when I'm malfunctioning, and he promised to teach me how to ride a bike. He also helped me detach most of my weapons; It's still hard to get through metal detectors, but I'm usually allowed through after a quick examination nowadays. Jenny, my neighbor's five-year-old, made me a paper-mache head, but it caught on fire after I put it on. Henry's going to help her weld a new head for me. It will have detachable hair and adjustable shape so that I can change it until I find a look that I like. I think I want my eyes to be blue, like your hair.
"I trust that all is well on your end. Call the number below if Murdoc gives you any trouble.
"Sincerely,
"Cyborg.
"P.S. Henry has been calling me Cy. I kind of like it."
2D concluded his reading with a smile. "It seems like she's getting along well. I'm glad she's making some friends."
"Yeah, I guess…" Noodle said slowly. 2D noticed tense emotions flitting across her face. "I still think it's odd that after everything that happened on Plastic Beach, you two are friends. She's taken a very… unnerving… interest in you. And it's a bit creepy that she wants her eyes to be the color of your hair." The way her face twitched when she said that, 2D almost thought she looked jealous.
Jealous?
Nah. Noodle doesn't get jealous. Especially not of her own replica. What would she be jealous of anyway?
But just to be sure that Noodle wouldn't worry…
"Cyborg seems to be getting close to this Henry bloke. I bet they're good buddies."
2D grinned as some of the tension left Noodle's shoulders. "Yeah. She might even change her mind and decide to look like him."
2D sat down at the table, and Noodle pushed a plate of eggs and toast towards him. "Eat up, we've got lots to do today. Before we hit the library, I want to stop at the motorcycle outlet. This letter says that my new motorcycle is ready, and I'm excited to take it out for a spin! I thought that we could take a cab up to the outlet, then ride the motorcycle to the Library."
"Sounds good," 2D said. He'd never ridden a motorcycle before (for some reason, no one trusted him with one), but it had always looked fun.
Just then, unsteady footsteps could be heard pounding down the hallway. Murdoc stumbled into the kitchen and plopped down at the table, cradling his head in his arms and groaning. He stole 2D's glass of orange juice, downed the whole thing, then slammed the glass onto the table.
"Good morning, Murdoc!" 2D said cheerfully.
"Shut up!" Murdoc replied, allowing his head to sag onto the table. The toaster pinged loudly, causing Murdoc to visibly cringe, and Noodle rose to put the fresh toast on a plate for the bassist.
As Noodle passed him his plate, she said, "I suppose you won't be joining 2D and I today?"
Murdoc grumbled in reply and lifted his head slightly so that he could take a piece of toast. Noodle rolled her eyes.
"Well, if you're feeling up to it later, it would be helpful if you could start translating the writing on the walls with a bit more detail. 2D and I will be at the library if you need us." Noodle stood up and turned to the singer. "Since we'll be taking the motorcycle, I would recommend you grab a windbreaker. I'm going to fetch my own jacket now."
"Okay, I suppose I'll get mine now too." 2D replied. The pair rose from the table and left Murdoc to finish his toast in peace. Noodle glanced one last time at Cyborg's postcard before they left the kitchen. As they made their way silently down the hall, 2D thought that Noodle appeared somewhat troubled. The tension he had noted when he announced Cyborg's postcard was returning to her shoulders, and judging by her unfocused gaze, she was engaged deeply in thought. They arrived at the bottom of the stairway and 2D was about to leave Noodle to fetch his jacket when the guitarist spoke.
"Hey, 2D…" 2D stopped and turned towards his bandmate curiously. Noodle paused briefly, as if not quite knowing how best to put her thoughts into words, then continued hesitantly. "I understand that Cyborg was not particularly… polite to you, when you were on Plastic beach. But when I see how she's pursuing your friendship, I wonder, did anything… happen… with you two while you were there?" Noodle met 2D's gaze with a hard-to-read expression.
2D tilted his head slightly, not entirely sure what Noodle meant. "Well, there was that time she almost impaled me with a swordfish. Also, I nearly blew us all up when I tripped over a bomb she'd left lying around in the recording studio. Oh, and she requested Murdoc's permission to put me down after I accidentally spilled Pepsi on her circuitboard. Murdoc laughed at that, but didn't let her-"
"No, 2D," Noodle interrupted, shaking her head. "I mean, did anything positive happen between you two?" She cast him a serious look. 2D shuffled his feet under the sudden intensity of her stare.
He thought back to each of his encounters with Cyborg, each meal served with a cruel sneer, being walked between rooms at gunpoint… None of it struck 2D as positive. "Not that I can think of," he told Noodle.
Noodle nodded tensely, her eyes flickering between his own as if searching for some deep truth or emotion within them. 2D scratched the back of his neck nervously, feeling as if he were being investigated. When he ducked his head sheepishly, Noodle realized that she was making him uncomfortable. She turned towards the basement and said, "Okay, 2D. I'm sorry for making you think about that time; I know it's still hard for you."
"It's no trouble, love," 2D responded as he watched Noodle advance towards the basement door. She still looks down about something… What is it about Cyborg that's making her so uncomfortable? Just then, something clicked in 2D's mind. The guitarist was reaching for the handle of the basement door when 2D called, "Hey, Noodle!"
"Yes?" Noodle responded, turning to face the singer.
2D approached Noodle and stood in front of her, shuffling his feet timidly. "You know you're my best friend, right? Cyborg's my friend too now, but she's not my best friend. You… You're special." Overcome by a wave of awkwardness, 2D looked down at his toes, staring at them for a good five seconds before glancing back up at his friend. His heart leaped when he saw that she was smiling, her gaze significantly brighter than it had been moments ago. He held his arms out, offering her a hug.
Noodle smiled wider and walked into the hug, closing her arms tightly around 2D's waist. "Thank you, Toochie. That means a lot to me. And you're my best friend too."
2D felt a grin spread across his own face. "You never need to worry about me replacing you, love. You're irreplaceable."
They stood in each other's arms for a few moments before breaking apart. 2D looked down at the guitarist. It might have just been the odd lighting of the room, but her cheeks seemed slightly pink. Is she blushing? Come to think of it, my cheeks feel a little warm…
Noodle backed away towards the basement, still smiling. "Go grab your jacket; I'll meet you at the door in a minute and then we can go, Okay?"
2D nodded in consent as she slipped away into the basement. The singer then hopped up the stairs. There was a skip in his step as he set off to find his jacket.
. . .
Coming up next, 2D and Noodle do some research! Where will their inquiries lead them, and what will they discover?
I had a bit of fun coming up with Cyborg's story. I might even be tempted to write a story just for her someday. Each interview seemed to have a different explanation of what happened to the cyborg, ranging from her being destroyed and beheaded to riding bikes in Lincolnshire. I thought this seemed like a reasonable compromise.
By the way, I thought of this joke a while ago: When did 2D choose his outfit for the Strobelite video? When he was high and wasted! Ya gettit? High… waisted? Heh heh…
Anyway, see ya next chapter! It'll be a long one!