Do you wanna build a snowman?
Come on, let's go and play!
February 11, 2005
Dear Diary,
It snowed so much today!
I'm such a little kid, but I don't care. I've always loved the snow. I don't think Dean appreciates it as much as I do, though. Maybe he would appreciate it more if I hadn't woken him up at six am to make snow angels.
For some reason the topic stuck, and he doesn't believe in angels – even after all that he's seen. But, maybe that's why he doesn't believe. It does make me sad, though.
He said his brother has faith like I do – or, at least, he did. I didn't think Dean would be willing to talk about his brother much. I figured all family talk was off the table for him, but he seems to be trying to make himself stay angry at Sam.
I can feel the love, though. Even when Dean is bitching about his brother, his eyes are shining with pride. He's just venting, so I let him. I know what it's like to need someone to talk to, but not being able to find anyone who will just listen.
I would love to give him advice, though. I'd love to tell him that he doesn't need to be angry at his brother – that Sam didn't abandon him. If he abandoned anyone, it was John and his strict rules. I wish I could just make him understand that the leaving was never with the intent to hurt. Sam just wanted to go his own way.
I know what that feels like, but I won't dwell on that now. This day has been great, and I'm looking forward to snuggling in my warm pajamas, and sleeping for the rest of the day.
- Aubrey
I never see you anymore
Come out the door
It's like you've gone away
(AN: I couldn't resist. I had to use this song. lol. Sorry...)