I just want to say a quick thank you to everyone for the feedback/comments. I am really excited you all enjoy Peeta's POV since I really enjoy writing it. I have been writing Fan Faction and stories since I was a kid, but this is the first I am sharing with someone other than a teacher.
After the event with the Peacekeepers Katniss is quiet, but you can tell something is weighing on her mind. I wonder if it is something she would share with me if she wasn't stuck in her house by her heel. Her mother has put her on bed rest for at least a week. I come over every day, bringing along cheesy bread that I know is Kantiss's favorite. The first couple of days she just stays in her room, not saying anything, staring out of the window. Then she brings out this old book. It has sketches and samples of different kind of plants and their uses. Most of it is obviously used for medicinal purposes, but Katniss shows me the part that her father put in, the one that was the guide to keeping herself and her family alive after he died in that explosion. She explains to me that she wants to add her knowledge.
"I have learned a lot about plants being our there in the woods. Gale taught me a few things and then there's what I learned in the Games," she says. I nod. This is a great idea. It will keep her busy and help inform others in the future, because you never know when Snow will be tired of playing with us.
We spend our mornings together in her bedroom, her explaining plants in detail so I can draw them out. I bring scrape paper because I want to get her approval before I draw it into the book. She is very good at being descriptive and I imagine that when, if ever, she is able to tell stories about her life, wither it is the time in the woods or the Games, she would be just as good painting a picture with her words as I am with my brushes. Some of the plants we have photos of, others we have sample that we carefully tape in place. It is time consuming. I get so engrossed in my work that I am able to not pay attention when she starts inspecting my face. I wonder what I look like while I am doing this. Is it along the lines of the serene look on the face of her mother when she is working on patients? If I concentrated on that too much I would not be able to draw.
Each afternoon I carry Katniss downstairs so she gets some different walls to look at. She likes to turn on the TV and watch it. I am not sure why she would want to watch all the propaganda, all of the replays of the past games, interviews with powerful people, who like to remind everyone that they are powerful. It makes me want to punch something when I see Snow on the screen talking about how, together as a country, we make sure things run so smoothly. Yea, with Peacekeepers and their guns and whips, they make the country run smoothly and for what? For the Capitol and their privileged offspring.
One day I am sketching a flower that Katniss has just given me the okay to draw into the book and suddenly I realize that this is the first thing we have done together that has not been forced. I suddenly stop and out of the corner of my eye I see her start. She looks almost embarrassed and I realize it must because she was staring at my concentration face again. "You know," I say, looking over at her. "I think this is the first time we've ever done anything normal together."
"Yeah," she agrees. "Nice for a change."
"Very nice," I say and get back to drawing the flower.
Katniss starts getting cabin fever. Her mother lets her walk around a bit and gives her exercises to do to make sure her bones are healing back properly, but you can tell she wants to be outside. She thrives outside, it is the only place she seems to really be at ease. And that is what I have seen from her in town and in the Games. I imagine that it is multiplied by 100 when she is in the woods surrounding our district.
One morning, as I am heading out of the door to take bread over to Haymitch and the Everdeen's, I hear a car come to a stop. I look up and see Katniss's prep team, Effie and Cinna climbing out of the car and excited going into the house. I thought Haymitch said it would be another few weeks before the wedding photo shoot? I sigh, knowing she is doomed to be my bride if something doesn't change.
I go on over to her house first, no working on the book today with them there, doubt I will see Katniss at all, actually, so I drop the bread off with her mother and trudge off to check in on Haymitch. I knock on the back door and Hazelle answers in just a few moments. Normally I would just walk in, but since Hazelle has been working for Haymitch I do not want to scare her by just walking in. hat if she was upstairs and didn't hear me. It just seems rude not to knock or ring the bell while someone is awake and moving inside the house.
She smiles and steps back to let me in. "Good morning, Peeta," she says brightly.
"Good morning, Hazelle," I answer. I put the bread down on the table and notice Haymitch is not in his usual spot passed out. "Where's Haymitch?"
"I found him asleep in his bed this morning," she says. "Much easier to clean the kitchen without having to worry about bumping him." I nod.
"That's good. I know sleeping at the table is not good for him," I say. Well, Haymitch is asleep, Katniss is in prep, what to do? "Well, I am going to get on. If you are still here when Haymitch wakes up ask him if he will come find me," I say.
"You going to be over at the Everdeen's?" Hazelle asks, while wrapping the bread in a towel to keep it fresh.
"No, looks like her prep team is here. Time for the photo shoot, I guess," I say, trying to sound offhand. She stops and looks over at me. Her face shows sadness, she too must know that, on my part, the love is real. She also must know that Katniss is in love with her son. She recovers quickly and smiles.
"That's nice. I have been wondering what the dresses look like. I guess we will see them soon." She turns away from me.
"Yea. Well, have a good day, Hazelle," I say and walk out the back door.
I decide to walk to town and see my father. I will not burden him with anything that is weighing on my mind, but it will be nice to see him though. While I walk down the road from the Village to the square I cannot help but think of the ridiculous dresses they must be putting her in. I've seen what they like wedding dresses to look like in the Capitol. If Katniss was to ever be able to get married for real I imagine she would want to wear the nicest pair of pants and a nice button down shirt. I laugh internally at the thought of her and Gale wearing the exact same thing at their wedding. For her sister and mother she would probably wear a dress. Maybe a deep green like the one she wore in District 4. Then I sigh, because we all know that the only wedding she will be getting is one in the Capitol, where her husband will be me.
Suddenly I want to be alone. I do not want to be around anyone. Why would I force my company on anyone when I have put us all into such a wonderful mess? Even my family has suffered, not much, but a little, just because I am their son. They do not get very much business in times like these, but this time they get even less.
I find myself running all the way back to my house in the Village. I ignore the greeting from I hear from Katniss's front door, Effie, I think. I just run inside and slam the door. Being inside isn't much better. I want to run. Run away so that I do not hurt anyone ever again. What would Thread do if I walked into the woods? Would I get the firing squad? Would my death be enough to stop people from hurting our district? No, no. It would make things worse because I would not be here to try to make things right. How am I going to make things right?
I spend the day staring at a blank canvas, just trying to get any kind of idea of how I could back out of this wedding. I paint nothing, nothing in my head to paint at the moment. Finally I give up and go up to bed, even though it is early for bed. That night I just toss and turn and do not get much rest. I keep having dreams of Katniss is white silk streaked with blood, surrounded by the people she loves the most. The worst part is I am there, standing with her in a suit, also covered in blood, but I am the one with the sword. Their deaths are at my hands. I wake up many times, but each time I have a continuation of that same dream, each time a new victim.
When I finally do wake up in the early hours of the morning I decide to go on and get up. I go into the kitchen and need to get out of the house. I wrap up and start toward town. It doesn't take me very long to reach the bakery. I knock on the back door and my mother opens it, a scowl on her face. My presence doesn't cheer her up very much and I wonder if she wishes I had died in the Games.
"What do you want?" she asks, moving back to let me in.
"I just wanted to visit. I haven't been by in a while," I say walking in. "Do you need any help with anything?" She stops and looks at me with a weird look on my face. Almost like she cannot believe I want to work. Does she really think I am that lazy?
"I guess you can start decorating the cakes," she says dismissively. I smile, at least she knows where I want to be. My father and one of my brothers are good decorators, but no one likes theirs as much as they like mine. I find myself getting lost in the old routine here. I haven't been here like this since I became a victor. I find myself forgetting all about the Capitol, the rebellion, Katniss and the wedding. I let myself get lost in frosting and little white flowers. It's not until I hear a few customers talking about a mandatory viewing from the Capitol tonight.
"Must be the reading of the card," my father says. The customer must look confused because my father says, "You know, the one they read at every Quarter Quell." I do not hear the reply. "Oh, well, Peeta is here, we can ask him. Peeta!" my father calls over his shoulder. I walk up to the counter and see one of the older teachers from the school. Must be lunch time.
"Yes?" I am very curious at what they might need to know from me. I haven't talked to anyone from the Capitol in weeks.
"We heard that it they might be showing Katniss and the dresses tonight," she says, looking at me for some kind of confirmation.
"I really don't know. If they are no one has let me know. But they just did the shoot yesterday" I answer honestly. Could they already have the film edited enough to show it tonight? Knowing the Capitol, I am sure they do.
"Well, are you excited? If it is the wedding dresses that means that the wedding should be soon," she says. I know she is wanting more information.
"I am very excited. I cannot wait to have Katniss to be my wife," I answer, knowing that in this reality nothing could be further from the truth, but at the same time I do want to be her husband. If we do get married maybe I can protect her better.
The day moves too quickly for my liking, but finally I have no choice but to head back to my home in the Village. I make it home just in time to see the TV turn itself on and begin the show. Sure enough I see Caesar Flickerman as he begins gushing to his audience about the upcoming pictures of their sweetheart, Katniss Everdeen. So, it will be the dresses. Cinna did a wonderful job designing the dresses and Katniss looks wonderful in each one. The people in the Capitol are able to vote for their favorites and that is the dress she will marry me in. It is all I can do to walk away from the screen, but just as sure as I am that the houses are bugged, I am also sure there are some cameras hidden around too. Just as I am about to turn the TV off, I hear that they are about to do the reading of the card for the special circumstances that goes along with every Quarter Quell.
President Snow comes on screen then and explains what we here every year at the reaping, about the Dark Days, the beginning of the rules that made the games what they are today, and at every 25 year mark there is a special twist. The first time, 25 years after the first games, each district had to vote on who would be going into the games. I cannot imagine picking any person to get subjected to that kind of hell. I also cannot imagine how the kids who go chosen felt about their district after being given enough votes to go to the games. Horrible.
The second anniversary, the 50th year, each district got two boys and two girls reaped to go into the Games. Four children from each district, 47 children in all. That was the year that Haymitch won. I have never asked him how he did it and I never remember seeing it replayed.
"And now we honor our third Quarter Quell…," Snow says and I find myself thinking of which children I will have to coach, who I will have to keep alive. I am not really paying attention to the screen. "On the seventy-fifth anniversary, as a reminder to the rebels that even the strongest among them cannot overcome the power of the Capitol, the male and female tributes will be reaped from their existing pool of victors."
I am stunned for a half of a heartbeat and then I am on my feet. Katniss. She is the only female victor from our district. She is guaranteed to go back into that arena. I know what I have to do. I find myself flying out of the house and toward Haymitch's. I have to go back in with her. I have to get her back to her family, to Prim, to Gale. Haymitch is going to do this for me. I bust in the front door and let it slam behind me. I find Haymitch in his living room, looking at the TV.
"Peeta," he says. "So nice of you to come visit." He turns to me as I move to stand in front of him, snapping the top off a new bottle of white liquor. "What are you going to ask of me? To save her?"
"Of course," I say. I sit in one of the chairs and looks at him. "You owe me, Haymitch. You helped her in the first games, you tried to keep her alive at my death. Now I am telling you to help me keep her alive. You know that if she dies and I live I will have nothing waiting for me. You know I cannot deal with my life at the cost of hers."
"I know. And I will," he says. That is just not good enough. He is going to promise me that he will do everything to save her.
"Haymitch. Say you promise me. If I get picked you will not volunteer to take my place. You will do everything, anything in your power to get her out of that arena alive, even though it means I will die," I say with earnest. He just sits there and looks at me. Studying my face in a way that makes me think he is not going to agree.
"Promise me, Haymitch. You owe me this for leaving me in the first games and only helping her." Even though that is what I wanted, for her to live, but I know Haymitch hates having to choose who he helps each year. This year I will make it easy for him. I am choosing for him. I am not sure what finally makes him speak up, but finally he says, "Fine. If that is what you really want. I promise I will try to keep her alive, at your expense. I promise I will not volunteer if your name is chosen." I relax just a little, but I am still all wound up inside.
"This is going to be hard. She will be trying to save me. She will want you to choose me this time. Tell her you will, but do not go back on the promise you gave me, Haymitch. If I come out alive and she is dead I will make the rest of your life a living hell, or at least kill you," I say, making a promise myself.
"Alright. Alright," Haymitch says, taking a swig of the bottle. He looks down, looking so much older than he really is.
"Alright," I say and walk out, slamming his door behind me. What else can I do? I have to make sure we are all ready. I slowly walk back to my house, trying to get a plan going in my brain. I think of stopping in on Katniss, but I am sure she really needs to be with her family right now. I go into my house and walk up the stairs. I position a chair in front the window so I can look down on anything that happens below. After a little bit I see Gale walk into the Village. He walks straight to Katniss's house and rings the bell. Mrs. Everdeen lets him in. I expect that Katniss is inside, holding on to her sister, not crying, being strong for them like she always is.
I sit for a while, trying to work some kind of plan out in my head. I see a movement from Haymitch's house. At first I think it must be Haymitch either coming to see me or Katniss or staggering someplace for someone to find him passed out in the morning. But the staggering figure I see is too slight to be Haymitch. I am shocked as I watch Katniss stagger up to her door. What is she thinking? She needs to be getting her head together, not picking up a horrible habit. I watch in shock as Gale opens the front door and pulls Katniss to him. Anger and jealousy flair up in my chest. Katniss drops the bottle and passes out in Gale's arms. Anger wins out. Am I going to be the only one who takes this seriously? Katniss is for sure going back into the Games and it will either be me or Haymitch with us. Either way we all have to at our very best.
I jump up, a plan finally forming in my head. I run downstairs and call Effie's number.
"Hello?" I hear her chime.
"Effie? It's Peeta," I say quickly.
"Oh, Peeta. I cannot believe the news….," she begins.
"Yes, yes, I know. It's horrible. Look, I need you to do something for me," I say, not really caring if I offend her right now.
"Well, um, of course, Peeta, anything," she says.