Chapter 4
The next thing she was aware of was a sharp knock on the wooden tabletop which nearly made her jump out of her seat. She'd fallen asleep. Looking up to see Vanus Galerion glaring down at her, she was instantly nauseated. "Go away," she groaned, letting her head fall back to the table with a thump.
"Still sick?" He inquired with that awful tone that inferred some knowledge of the cause of her ailment.
"Just tell me what you did with him. I just want to know the truth." She demanded, struggling to ignore the compulsion to retch.
"I told you; he left of his own volition. I didn't do anything to him. I don't know why you think he's such a fine example of goodness and loyalty. I can assure you, he's nothing of the sort. He wanted to leave. He had other interests to pursue."
"I need to go," she blurted out, knowing only that she needed to get away from Galerion before she was sick again. She gathered her books and made haste for the exit. He followed several paces behind and watched, shaking his head as she ran for the privacy of a nearby stand of oak trees to retch.
"Lilaena," he said in a low voice, slowly drawing nearer, "Is this normal for you?"
She shook her head, puzzled by his question. How could suddenly being violently ill for no apparent reason be normal for anyone?
"Did you eat something that may have been spoiled? Tell me the truth, child – Have you been drinking?"
"No," she replied, "I haven't. I swear it. It's all of the stress; it's this awful situation, I don't know… Just leave me alone."
"Go back to your quarters and rest. If you don't feel better soon, I'll bring a healer by to have a look at you."
"Thank you." She actually dreaded the idea of Galerion coming by with a healer to look at her. She just wanted to be far away from his stomach-turning presence. She couldn't tell if he was truly concerned, or if he was hoping to prove she was actually hung over and have her banished from the Order. Surely he would relish having an excuse to persecute the protégé of his arch rival.
Lilaena headed back to her room. She held her books against her chest to keep everything steady as she walked. Otherwise it hurt too much. She was spent, sick, and now she was in pain. She felt like the whole of Nirn was crashing down around her. If only she could run away, back to Auridon. But she knew better. Her family would disown her if they found she'd abandoned the Order. Her being accepted was their main source of pride. She couldn't face them having left over something like this. They would never understand.
That night, she experienced another vivid dream. This time, however, at least it was less horrific, if still quite peculiar. She found herself carrying a bundle of blankets, and when she pulled them aside, she found a tiny white Khajit gazing lovingly back at her with crystal blue eyes. A strange mer walked up and looked at the bundle. He asked her, disparagingly, why she would carry a cat around in a blanket. Offended, she shooed him away. How could he be so insensitive? She thought, He might be a feral animal to you, but he's still my baby!
She woke up and stared into the darkness of her room, pondering the dream and what it could possibly mean. Before she could figure it out, she was back asleep, dreaming another wild dream. It had something to do with being chased by slaughterfish, but upon awaking again she was so sick, she didn't have time to lie there and consider possible meaning of it. She quickly made the determination that she would stick to her quarters for the day.
It was a bizarre illness. There were moments when she felt quite alright. Then she would be famished and could sit there and down half a loaf of bread and an apple or two, and an hour later be retching like she'd been poisoned. The feeling of pure exhaustion and that lingering twinge of grief never quite left her, though. Perhaps it would be wise to have the healer examine her, just to make sure she hadn't somehow contracted some exotic, deadly disease. She waited patiently, expecting Galerion to come by at any time. A day passed, then two. As she lay in bed studying, she began to notice how exceedingly uncomfortable it was becoming to lie on her stomach. How odd, she thought. And then, a sudden, stark realization came over her. She instantaneously understood the cause of her illness and what it meant she had to do. Her heart abruptly leapt from her chest into her throat and her mind was racing a thousand places at once. She needed to leave the Order - NOW. Before Vanus Galerion arrived with his healer.
She rushed around, cramming various necessities into a large knapsack. She was terrified Galerion and the healer would get to her before she had a chance to flee with her newly discovered secret. If they were to somehow find out… she didn't even want to think of what might happen.