Chapter 14

"Ugh, not now it's been in your filthy gob." Rioghnan shot back, curling his upper lip in disgust.

"Ya s'wit, that's the point." Nilsie shot back, offended. "And it ain't filthy."

"Why don't you just hand it over? Why'd you have to put your mouth on it?"

She rolled her eyes emphatically and laughed. "You're such an arse, Rioghnan. You've got no inkling at all why I might've done that?"

"No," he insisted, mystified. He tried to fathom why on Nirn she'd have done a stupid thing like that. She was such a strange mer. Perhaps it was some Dark Elf custom he'd never been exposed to.

Nilsie sighed in defeat. "I did it… so you'd have to kiss me. Okay?"

Rioghnan made a face. "You're a right weird elf."

"I ain't. You are. I've never met no elf weird as you are."

"Why would you want to kiss me? I hardly know you."

"I don't; I was windin' ya up that's all. S'wit."

Rioghnan was quite certain that she was lying and had, in fact, fancied a kiss from him. Having only been in receipt of the occasional smooch on the cheek from his mother, however, and possessing very little knowledge of anything in the world outside her watchful presence, he couldn't begin to fathom why. He squinted at her dubiously, so that his eyes were nearly obscured by stark white lashes. A peculiar and mystifying thought crossed his mind that perhaps it would be somewhat pleasant to kiss Nilsie. Part of him wanted to try it. Another part of him wanted to pinch her or pull her hair instead, to see if perhaps she might cry. She had called him a s'wit again, after all. As a compromise, he presently licked the palm of his hand and wiped it on her skirt. She shrieked, seized his hand and viciously dug her fingernails into it. Rioghnan laughed so hard he went all silent and tears filled his eyes.

"Ugh!" Nilsie exclaimed. She let go of his hand and punched him in the knee, apparently infuriated at his amusement.

The punch actually hurt a little. "Ouch," he managed, still laughing. He kicked at her, catching her in the shin, which incensed her even more.

Nilsie swore and lunged at him, but she was so diminutive and lightweight that he just reached out and caught her mid-lunge around the ribcage, inverting her and pinning her down in one swift motion. She struggled and made raspberries, trying to spray him in the face.

"Stop," he ordered her, trying to take an authoritative tone but still giggling and breathless from laughing so much. "Stop or I'll - bite your nose off." She wouldn't relent, so he leaned in closer as if he was actually going to do it. She picked up her head and licked him in the face. "Ew!" Rioghnan couldn't think of anything else do to, his hands occupied keeping hers immobile, so he did the same thing to her. She screamed terrifically, much to his delight. "Take it," he growled, aiming to lick her again. This time he got her square in the eye. Nice one! He was laughing so hard it began to sound like he was sobbing. He lowered his face down to hers, pondering his next move. Intentionally drooling onto her forehead struck him as an outstanding idea.

"Quit it – let me go, ya bloody arsehole," Nilsie whined, half-laughing.

Rioghnan shook his head, grinning evilly; his face millimeters from hers. She struggled underneath him and he found it peculiarly enjoyable.

She repeated her demand, though a bit less emphatically. He refused to budge. Suddenly, she lifted her face and kissed him right on the mouth. It surprised him, as he was fully expecting to be spat on or head-butted, and he pulled back instinctively. "There," she panted with a coy smile, "Got ya."

Nonplussed, but not exactly hating this new turn of events, Rioghnan repeated her actions straightaway. He could hear the pounding of his own heart in his ears above the rhythm of the music from the club below. Nilsie kissed him back, so he did the same to her – it was all quite novel and thrilling. Then, abruptly, she tried to shove him away. "Ew, get off!" She shrieked.

Rioghnan pulled back and stared at her, baffled.

"Get off; you're pokin' me, ugh!"

"Huh?" Rioghnan scrambled backward until he was leaning against the wall again, mystified by the unexpected turn of events.

"You're pitchin' a tent, ya shitehawk!" Nilsie pointed at his pajama bottoms, grimacing.

"What, I'm not a shitehawk; that just… happens sometimes. I didn't do it on purpose," Rioghnan tried to explain, still not certain as to why she found it so horrifying. Feeling a bit mortified at the realization that this was clearly something offensive, he pulled his shirt down to conceal the evidence. "There, now it's gone," he declared. He struggled not to crack a smile for fear she might attack.

"Nasty boy. I hate you with a passion," Nilsie shot back – but she too was obviously trying to keep a straight face.

"No you don't. You like me." He sighed casually, as he was quite certain he was correct.

"I do not."

"Aye. You do. If not then you wouldn't've kissed me like that."

Nilsie stuck out her tongue.

"Aye, you want to lick me now?"

"Fuck off," she laughed incredulously.

He gave her a smug little grin, to which she immediately responded with a rude gesture.

"What's that? A sign of love?"

"Love for what, your nasty high elf wang?"

He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

"Ughhhhhh!" Nilsie pummeled him with kicks until he fell over laughing.

"Oi! Who's up there?" An unfamiliar, deep voice cut through the rhythmic din of the club's music.

Rioghnan instantly bolted upright and Nilsie whipped around in the direction of the voice. Amber firelight from a handheld torch flickered on the familiar bonemold armor of a Hlaalu guard. "You two, come down from there!"

Rioghnan glanced fearfully at his companion. The two of them shuffled over and climbed down. The guard studied Rioghnan. "Aren't you the one we're looking for? The Altmer boy who's missing? Your mum's having a right fit, you know."

Rioghnan dropped his head and stared at the toes of his boots.

"This is all your fault," Nilsie hissed.

"Liar, you made me go," he retorted.

The guard briskly ushered both of them across town to a guard tower at the opposite wall. Before he could even open the door, Lilaena spilled out, sobbing, and rushed to embrace her son.