"Well well, aren't YOU in a bit of a predicament..."
The Ferryman's head shot up and he looked around him as light, silvery laughter echoed throughout the cavern.
"It must be so hard to be a Ferryman...you never quite know who you'll run into...or what."
The area was completely dark, save for the lantern he carried. Luckily, it was sealed shut, protecting the blue flame within from the murky river. Holding it up he backed away in surprise upon seeing a grinning spider hovering just inches in front of him.
"!"
"My name is Muffet, charmed I'm sure." She winked at him and sat down on a thin string of her web, crossing her legs with a smile.
"..."
"Not a chatty person I assume? No matter, men are better seen and not heard anyway..."
Turning to leave, the Ferryman was surprised to see a web blocking his way forward.
He didn't have time for this.
"Leaving already? But we've only just met! You should stay awhile ahuhuhuhu~"
He lifted his lantern, resolving to burn the web down, but it was quickly snatched away by a thread that had suddenly shot out from the darkness and coiled around the handle, yanking it from his grip. "I believe I asked you to stay dearie," said Muffet balancing the lantern on one of her fingertips. "I'm in a bit of a bind you see-"
"Hellwoe? Who dat be?"
Both Muffet and the Ferryman turned their heads in surprise upon hearing a very familiar voice calling out from the other side of the web.
What was that?
"Hellwoooe?"
Again, the voice called out to her, pleading for an answer. She didn't know why, but the sound was attacking her heart; bring forth feelings she'd no idea she'd forgotten.
Protectiveness,
Love,
"I know somebody be over here! Why you no answer da' baby?"
Dread,
Panic,
"Is lonely and scary in dis cave...I's all by myselves and gots no one to take care of me...isn't dat sad?"
Guilt.
"Don't you feel bad for me?"
Shuffling could be heard beyond the web, as the infant crawled around, probably trying to see past the thick threads.
I know I've heard this voice somewhere...why can't I remember?
Muffet wracked her brain for the lost memories she once held so dear, but nothing came to mind.
Not that it mattered.
Muffet had a guest to attended to at the moment, and it wouldn't do for her to be rude to a potential partner after all.
"Seems we've another guest, but no matter. You and I have business to discuss-"
"Muder?! Is dat you Muder?! I hears mah mommy over there!"
"*GASP!*"
All at once the memories came flying back.
The time she'd spent looking after a little skeleton baby, giving him sweets and hugs, teaching him how to behave properly...it all came back to her in perfect clarity, making her wonder how she'd ever forgotten to begin with.
Papyrus! My little sweetling...
But no, that's impossible...
Papyrus had already grown up!
It can't be him...right?
Muffet hurried over to the web and smiled happily upon seeing Baby Papyrus beaming at her from the other side.
"Oh my goodness! It really is you!"
My little precious...!
Tearing the threads, she gathered Papyrus into two of her six arms and snuggled the little bundle of bones lovingly. Her motherly affection may have died for the adult version, but she had missed her little one...
"Nyeh heh ha ha! You gush on da' baby!"
"Oh I missed you so very very much! However did you get so young again I wonder?"
The last time Muffet had seen Papyrus, he was much taller than herself. He had been kind enough to warn her about an "expert spider-killer" and after a long while of begging and pleading, she finally elected to grant him pity and stay out of sight. She remembered him saying that he wanted her to be safe...that he still cared about her, even though she no longer had any interest in him now that he was an adult.
Pitiful.
"I doesn't know what you's talkin' bout'. You confuse da' baby..."
"You don't know...? How very strange! You wouldn't lie to Mommy now, would you?" Muffet tickled the baby bones playfully as the Ferryman stood in place watching the two.
"Nyeh heh ha ha!" Papyrus laughed happily, kicking his legs. He had missed her as much as he had missed him. Muffet used to watch over Papyrus a long time ago and was a big part of the baby's life, but when he switched to living with Sans in the big house instead of the Lab, she seemed to have disappeared into thin air! He searched and searched but poor Pappy couldn't find her anywhere in the Underground...
"Where did you go Muder? I couldn't find you nowheres!"
"Ahuhuhu~ I've been down here dearie-"
"You falled down the waterfall?"
"Don't interrupt me."
"Oh! Oops!" Papyrus covered his mouth with his hands.
"Good boy..."
"..."
"I crawled into a secret place and hid before the human came, then I came down here to make a new home for myself. I've missed you something awful my little terror~"
"I miss-ed you too Muder! I looked and looked but da' baby couldn't find you...I's real sad."
Muffet pet his head affectionately and turned to the Ferryman. "Well you won't have to fret any longer sweetling, because Mommy's here now and she's going to protect you all over again...and bring back everyone in the Underground as well..." She smiled in the Ferryman's direction and he felt a chill run up his spine. She looked so sweet, but her voice hid an ominous malevolence that even the most oblivious person could spot.
This was not a nice person.
"Ahuhuhuh! Why so afraid dearie? All I ask is that you lend me an extra hand, I only have six after all!"
The Ferryman took a step back.
"Oh no, don't run away! Don't you want to help a pretty damsel in distress..?"
"..."
Hmm..perhaps this person is a bit TOO quiet...
"Muder?"
"A moment sweetling, Mommy has business to discuss..I could really use a ferryman right now~ Be a dear and bring all the monsters who've died to the surface won't you?"
If I bring everyone back, they'll owe me quite a bit!
Life IS priceless after all...
"He not gonna help, he try to drown da' baby!"
Muffet's smile faded. "Really?"
"Yep. He throwed the baby into da' water and I falls down the waterfall!"
"...I see. Well I'm afraid that behavior is unacceptable."
The Ferryman took another step back.
"We can't have people throwing babies into rivers! Think of the pollution it'd cause!" giggled Muffet, putting a hand to her mouth.
"He needs to be taught the manners!" exclaimed Papyrus accusingly.
"I agree..and I know just who can help, ahuhuhuhu~" Muffet snapped her fingers.
GRRROOOO!
A large shadow encompassed the Ferryman and squinting his eyes, he saw a gigantic cupcake-like spider rise behind Muffet, towering over them all.
GRRROOOOOOO!
"Make Mommy proud~"
GRRRROOOOO!
"!"
SPLASH!
With a swipe of its leg, Muffet's pet sent the Ferryman flying into the river where he disappeared beneath the vast array of souls.
"Yaaay! Take dat doody-dress!" cheered Papyrus happily pumping his fist in the air.
Justice was his!
"*Sigh* Such a shame, he could have been so useful..."
The baby bones gave her a peck on the cheek. "Don't worry Muder, we can do's it ourselves! We makes a net with yo' web and do the fishing-"
GRRO..?!
Suddenly Muffet and the baby heard the cupcake spider cry out in surprised confusion. Turning around they saw that the giant creature was quickly beginning to shrink much to its dismay.
"MY BABY!"
GRRROOOO!
Further and further it shrank until a figure Muffet knew very well was able to be seen behind it, they eventually became so small it fit in their hand and she watched in horror as it ceased movement, becoming what looked like a shiny brooch.
"Hello Papyrus," said Lolita pinning her new cupcake brooch onto her dress. "However did you get all the way down here?"
"RETURN MY PET AT ONCE!"
"I falled."
"Oh no! Poor babyyy!"
"I know you heard me dearie..."
No Fear poked his head out from a crevice in the rock. "Did you get it?"
"YOU planned this?!"
How dare he...
"C'mon babe-"
"DON'T call me that."
"Your pet's safer with Lolita! Remember when the giant dog-"
"I don't remember asking for your assistance, in fact, I'm fairly sure I didn't. Do YOU remember me asking anyone to turn my darling into an ugly accessory?"
"UGLY?!"
"No, I don't remember dat at all..."
"YOU WOULDN'T KNOW UGLY IF YOU SAW YOUR REFLECTION!" exclaimed Lolita, outraged with the monster's rudeness. It was true Muffet had granted her and No Fear refuge, but she didn't have to be so mean to them! They were only trying to help!
"Take it easy baby doll, remember Muffet's helping us avoid Hades-"
"I DON'T CARE! SHE CAN'T TALK TO ME THAT WAY!"
"What? But dearie I was talking to the baby..."
"Calm down sis!"
"YOU CALM DOWN!"
"We's gonna make dat net now?"
"You know you really shouldn't yell like that around here, you never know who might be listening~"
"Muder, da' net-"
"SO?! WE DON'T NEED YOU! YOU CAN'T JUST BOSS US AROUND ALL YOU WANT JUST CAUSE' YOU GAVE US A PLACE TO HIDE!"
Baby Papyrus took himself out of Muffet's arms using his wingdings.
"It's my web, so I make the rules. You've a lot of nerve calling ME bossy, thief."
"I'M NOT A THIEF!"
"Then give me my pet."
"Hey, where you going, kiddo?"
"NO, IT'S MINE!"
"I's going home. I's bored and it be loud in here," said Baby Papyrus crawling towards the waterfall. It shouldn't be TOO hard to climb up there as long as he had his nine hands. If he got tired, he could just draw a block and rest!
"How're ya' gonna get up there though? Muffet won't let us use her web..."
"Don't worry, baby got dem skillz!"
"Oh yeah?" No Fear laughed as he continued to follow Papyrus, his hands in his pockets.
Kid's cute.
"Yep! I goes up and get Snas to help you!"
"Heh heh heh, well aren't you nice?"
"Yeah, I's a nice bae-"
"What's the catch?" asked No Fear still smiling.
"Nyeh?"
"I know you're not helping us for free, soooo I'm guessing you want us to find everyone ourselves while you're gone?"
"Well dat WOULD be awful gen-er-ous of you...babies shouldn't be in such dangerous paces ya' know?"
Thought so.
"You're right, I'll go find everyone for you and if Hades shows up I'll tell em' you sent me-"
"Don't do dat."
"Heh heh heh, what? Why not?"
The baby didn't respond, he simply began to climb the waterfall as best he could. It was really too bad that he couldn't summon an umbrella, Papyrus could've REALLY used one at the moment. The crashing water was almost enough to knock him down!
"CAREFUL PAP!" called No Fear from below. He hadn't thought about the strength of the waterfall either. "SHOULD I GET MUFFET TO HELP YOU?"
"I CAN DO'S IT-NYEH! BY..MYSELVES!" yelled Papyrus, trying to keep the water out of his eye sockets. He really should have just drawn a bunch of blocks away from the water and made a staircase or something.
"Grrrr..."
"Nyeh?" Papyrus stopped climbing and looked around in confusion. "Hellwoe?"
"GRRRRR!"
"HEY PAPYRUS, YOU MIGHT WANNA MOVE LIL' DUDE!"
"NYEH!"
CLACK!
The baby bones cried out as Cerberus pounced on the waterfall in an attempt to get to him. The giant dog's claws scrapped the rocky wall beneath the rushing water just inches from the tiny skeleton's feet, then backing up, it prepared to leap again.
"LEAVE BABY ALONE DOODY DOG! I'S CLIMBING OVER HERE!" shouted Papyrus kicking his leg.
"GRRUFF! GRUFF GRUFF!"
The dog paid no attention to the order and hit the wall again and again, refusing to give up.
CLACK!
CLACK!
CLACK!
"HEY MUFFET, PAPYRUS NEEDS HELP. CERBERUS IS BEING ANNOYING AGAIN."yelled No Fear watching the dog with his hands still in his pockets.
Huh, I could've sworn the mutt was sleeping. Guess I was wrong.
Poor little guy, if my font wasn't so worthless I'd be able to do something, but I don't have any special abilities.
"NYEH-HAAA! SOMEBODY SAVE DA' BABY!"
No Fear picked up a nearby rock and threw it at one of the dog's heads, but unfortunately he couldn't throw that high and it wound up bouncing off the beast's shoulder as if it were a plastic bottle.
Oh well, I tried.
"GRRRRUFF! GRUFF GRUFF GRUFF! GRU-" Cerberus's barking was cut short as an array of strong threads wrapped around its snout, forcing the dog's mouth closed...one of them anyway.
"GRAH GRNN!" The other two heads worked to free the third from its sticky muzzle, tearing at the strings with their teeth and snarling angrily.
"YAAAY! TANK YOU MUDER!"
"PAPYRUS GET DOWN FROM THERE THIS INSTANT!" yelled Muffet stomping her foot.
"I GOTS TO GO GET SNAS!"
"NO YOU DO NOT!"
"Well I's still doin' it..."
"WHAT DID YOU SAY?"
"I SAYS I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER DA' WATERFALL!"
"PAPYRUS!"
Muffet quickly wrapped Cerberus's legs up with thread and hurried to climb the waterfall herself, but the baby was already gone... and from a distance, she could have sworn she heard Papyrus laughing.
"OH, YOU NAUGHTY BABY!"