Thank you for all the wonderful feedback! This chapter leads into the S1 finale and goes into Elise's backstory. My PM is always open if you have any questions, I'll gladly answer. Please read and review, I love getting reviews!
Flying back to Washington was quick and easy, mostly because my mind was somewhere else the entire flight. I checked into a hotel near the cemetery. The same one for the past five years; they remodeled it over the summer. It's not as run down anymore and the walls aren't a weird yellow orange. I laid in bed with a stack of files next to me, I was slacking on paperwork big time.
Jack's number sat scribbled across a post-it note stuck to the mirror. I haven't called it in a year; the phone call always goes the same: no one answers.
At first I had thought he had changed his number, but I ran it through the database and it was still his. I still have the same number too, so he knows who is calling... Unless he blocked me, but I only call once a year on the same day. He has to know it's me.
He had remarried two years ago, to a pretty school teacher named Evelyn. I had to force myself from digging into her background. I settled for their engagement photo in the local paper.
Why hadn't I remarried or gotten serious with anyone since Jack? Some would say I have commitment issues others would say I was still in love with Jack. I sighed and shut my laptop setting it on the nightstand.
I sunk into the stiff mattress pulling the sheets high up.
I would call him in the morning.
I dressed in a black button-down, black trousers and heels. My blazer, of the same color, hung off my chair as I tied the ribbon into my hair. Finishing off the knot at the top of my head I spun it so it laid against my neck. The air was thick with moisture today and my hair was beginning to frizz.
The blue post-it glared at me and I snatched it from the mirror, pulling my phone out, and quickly dialing.
No dial tone, just a voice saying the person I've reached wasn't available and to try again later. I needed to stop hoping that he'd pick up when he hasn't done it in five years.
My suitcase was packed and in the trunk of my rental car. My room was paid for and the sheets were folded neatly on the bed. I folded the post-it note back into my wallet and headed out the door, my heels echoing across the pavement.
Muscle memory took over and soon I was parked in the parking lot of the cemetery staring at the two figures ahead of me. I couldn't believe it, he actually came. Nerves began to take over as I made my way across the lawn passing familiar headstones. With each step closer my heart beat faster and my mind began to race.
They had their backs to me, but I could see Jack's birthmark behind his ear and hear his voice; it was deep and calm. The same way I remember it. I couldn't make out what they were saying just yet, I was either just not listening or too in awe that he actually showed.
"Jack?"
His body stiffened slightly at the sound of my voice. He turned around and our eyes locked. His green eyes were bright behind thick-rimmed glasses, his cheeks slightly rosy from the heat and a mass of curls hid his full lips. I frowned at the sight of Jack with a beard.
"Elise," His voice nearly melted me to my bones and the next thing I knew he was holding me. His large muscular frame held me so tightly. Memories of our life together came rushing to the surface. All these years I've been waiting to hear or see him, but now that he's here I'm worried it's too much.
"How have you been?" He asked me stepping back.
"I'm great, you?" I asked.
He smiled a genuinely happy smile and opened his mouth to answer but behind him, Evelyn turned to us, one arm snaking around his waist and the other-
"Pregnant. You're pregnant?" The words tumbled from my mouth as I stared at her hand resting on her round stomach.
"Seven months today," Evelyn smiled at me.
Jack sucked in a breath, "I'm sorry, Evelyn, sweetie this is Elise Flynn, my ex-wife and Theo's mother."
"Oh! I hadn't realized that's who you were, I thought you were trying to come on to Jack!" Evelyn joked, her cheeks flushing in embarrassment.
A nervous laughter trickled from my lips, "Been there, done that." Who the hell hits on somebody in a cemetery?
Evelyn laughed. "I've heard so much about you. Jack was right about your sense of humor, it always comes at the wrong times."
I'm not sure if she was trying to be funny or crass, but I did know one thing -I didn't like her. Now seeing her up close she was a spitting image of me. It seems like Jack has a very specific type. And this one doesn't have the history I do with him so she's even better.
I looked back at Jack. "Why are you here? You haven't been here the last five years,"
He shifted on his feet "I know. I couldn't bring myself-,"
"It's true! I didn't even know about you or Theodore until I got pregnant. Thought we'd pay respects to Jack Jr.'s. older brother."
I looked at Evelyn so blankly. We never called him by his first name, in the months he was with us we decided Theo fit him and joked we should have just kept it at Theo instead of naming him after my grandfather. Tears pricked my eyes and I forced a smile and a congratulations.
They were having a boy.
"I'm sorry, but I'd like my turn with my son, please," I couldn't even bring myself to look at Jack or his Elise 2.0. Everything about her was beginning to piss me off. How could she be so insensitive standing where she's standing? I may have lost him five years ago, but the pain is still there and for her to say-
"Elise," Jacks voice broke through my thoughts and I saw he was standing next to me alone.
"It's weird standing here."
"It's not ideal that's for sure," sarcasm flew off my tongue so quickly. My defense mechanism...just like Derek had said.
Next to me Jack shifted on his feet, "Do you-uh- do you ever wonder what it'd be like if it hadn't happened?"
"I used to all the time," I looked up at him to see him watching me. "I used to wonder how our life would have been like. You know, us still married, Theo running around with a sibling or two, or if you would have stayed in the Marines or not... But I stopped thinking about that a long time ago, Jack. I had to."
"I think about it all the time."
"Of course you do, we lost our son."
"No, I mean I think about life with you all the time..."
Frowning I turned to look at him. Anger bubbling up, "Jack you don't get to do that. You left. You left me to mourn by myself. I held out for months, waiting for you, but you never came back. I haven't been calling you these past five years to rekindle our marriage, I've been calling you so we can have closure and properly mourn our son."
"Elise, I was the one to find him. That image has haunted me for years. I deployed to get away from it all and then 9/11 happened and I couldn't just come back. I'm sorry I put you through that. I wish I could go back and fix it all. I still love you..."
"Oh, shut up Jack! You're married! You do realize she's a spitting image of me right?"
He didn't respond.
"You don't talk about me or your son, but marry a woman who looks like me? I thought I had issues, but you definitely take the cake on that one. And Jack Jr.? Really? You hated that when I suggested it,"
"Evelyn isn't you."
I laughed. "Keep telling yourself that..." I began to walk away. All these emotions were getting the better of me and this is not how I wanted to spend my day.
"You don't care that I still love you?" He asked.
I sighed, and turned to him. "You know, if you would have said this like... I don't know, maybe four years ago, then I would have cared. Jack, go take your wife home and I'll see you next year."
I left Seattle as quickly as possible. Spending all of my day on a plane and in a car. I didn't let what Jack told me affect how I felt. I needed to just push it aside and not dwell on it. As I drove home I thought about what else I could do on my leave. I could finish one of the books I started to read. Or catch up on my shows?
My cell phone buzzed on the seat next to me and I could see Jack's number flash across the screen. I parked in front of my apartment, opened my phone to take the call, and the decided I had nothing to say to him.
Annoyed and feeling a headache bloom I decided I was going to take a bath. My apartment was a welcoming sight. I was glad I had cleaned my apartment before I left because I didn't come home to the stiff smell of an empty place. Lavender and lemon invaded my senses and calmed my headache only slightly.
Hurriedly, I kicked my heels off and left my bags in my room, rushing to the bathroom to turn on the bath water. I had my tank top and short set folded on the sink and quickly undressed. The water was hot and soothing, instantly I could feel the last thirty eight hours washing from my body.
I kept my hair pinned up not in the mood to sleep with wet hair. My thought traveled back to the cemetery and my run in with Jack and his wife. Part of me wishes I wasn't so hard and part of me wishes I brought the journal that had all the things I wanted to say to him in it, with me. I wasn't even sure if I still had it, I probably lost in a move. I wrote it so long ago.
Theodores grave did have fresh flowers though. Evelyn must have placed them there, but my memory replays the moment over. There was bird feces on the right upper corner and I wished I'd seen it then.
Sighing, I glanced at the clock. I needed to get out now if I didn't want to fall asleep and drown. I always hated getting out of hot baths, it was always so cold. In one quick motion I stood up and nearly jumped out of my chest when the shrill sound of my ringtone echoed through the bathroom. I stared, hand to my chest, and curses on my lips at my phone buzzing on the counter.
Why was the FBI calling me at 3 in the morning?
It's a shorter chapter for sure, I wrote it over the course of three busy days. I'm going to be writing as much as I can until I catch up to where I stopped watching which is S3E8!
Let me know what you think!
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