perception

real-placebo-effect

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weary of days and hours

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i am weary of days and hours,

blown buds of barren flowers,

desires and dreams and powers,

and everything but sleep.

the garden of proserpine; algernon charles swineburne

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friday, september 2nd, 1941

7:24 AM

.

"Ridiculous," Naomi muttered under her breath, "Pretty bloody sure Dumbledore isn't meant to be literal."

Her fingers fumbled with her tie, striped yellow and black like bees, biting back her disappointment at not waking up to familiar gold and red, or green and silver. Burning the Hat was a mistake, an uncontrollable burst of magic as her iron grip over it slipped in face of the Hat's final, deafening proclamation.

Naomi brushed her dry palm on her robes, the black buttons so different to the silver buttons of her own time, and checked her reflection one more time before turning to see Ella Bones leaning casually against the doorway, waiting for her.

"You look good in yellow." Naomi nodded, smiling tightly, and followed the Hufflepuff to the Common Room where Nadirah and Angelica were sitting engaged in conversation. "Hey, guys!"

"Good morning, Ella." Nadirah said, cordially turning to face them. Naomi noticed that Nadirah had on a Prefect's badge – just as Kingsley one day would become the fairest Prefect. Who was she to him? His grandmother? His mother?

"The boys have gone to breakfast eating already, yeah?"

Nadirah sneered slightly. "Obviously. Pigs, the lot of them."

"Alastor's fault, I'll bet." Ella shook her head slightly in exasperation. "Let's get to the Hall, yeah? Hopefully, there's still some food on the table."

Naomi followed them out of the Common Room listening with only half an ear to their excited chatter to her about Hogwarts.

.

"Professor Burbage's giving out timetables. Ugh, look alive, young ones." Alastor mock-whispered to his friends, receiving a glare from Burbage in reply. Nadirah rolled her eyes.

"Considering we're all a year above you now, Alastor, I'd shut my mouth. Thanks, sir." Angelica smiled at the Hufflepuff Head who beamed back. Alastor scowled.

"Way to not rub things in my face, Angel."

"Don't call me that."

Naomi rolled her eyes at their antics – it seemed that this time's Alastor Moody was a lot more talkative – and scanned her timetable, nodding in satisfaction. She knew exactly where all the classrooms were so there shouldn't be a pr—

"I think," Damien started. "That one of us should, perhaps, show Naomi around? She doesn't know her way as well as we do."

"Damien's right." Nadirah nodded, frowning a bit. "What's your first lesson?"

Alastor peeked over her shoulder and gave Naomi a disgusted look. "Arithmancy."

"What's wrong with Arithmancy, Alastor?" Damien put in smoothly and the younger boy paled slightly, stammering about all the many virtues of the subject – quite an impressive feat, considering that the Alastor Moody she'd known knew about as much about Arithmancy as Lucius Malfoy did about stem cell research.

.

"Should I take it off?" James Potter taunted, playing up to the crowd that had gathered with a cruel eye trained on Severus Snape, who was dangling by his ankle in the air, paling considerably.

"TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT OFF! TAKE—OOOOH!" The crowd collectively yelled as two things happened; Snape was dropped to the ground in a big, thudding lump and Potter's nose made an audible crack as a fist flew into it. Black's eyes widened with horror.

"James—"

"You crazy bint! What the hell is wrong with you?" Potter yelled, though muffled as he tried his best to stem the blood flow. The girl in front of him looked absolutely livid, her face an ugly shade of red and eyes flashing.

"I am so sick of all of you!" Turning towards Black, who stood there, frozen, she shrieked, "Furnunculus!"

"Protego! Blake, stop or I'll be forced to put you in a dete—"

Lupin didn't get a chance to finish as Blake cast her next spell – "Densaugeo!" – which hit him perfectly and muffled his voice as his teeth grew rapidly. "Put me in detention? That would involve you actually taking action, Lupin! We all know how much you loathe taking responsibility!"

Potter made a noise of protest and flourished his wand in retaliation, "Everte statum!"

"Protego! Are you kidding me, Potter? Seriously? Pulsus!" Potter flew backwards, as a large ball of energy pushed him and she turned to Lupin and Pettigrew who both paled. Pettigrew attempted retaliation,

"Steleu—"

"Declino, the Sneezing Charm, Pettigrew? Pathetic. Let's see some real magic, hmm? BOMBARDA MAXIMA!" The ground near Pettigrew's feet exploded and he scuttled backwards, crying in alarm as did the other students. "You're all pathetic, Marauders – looters, more like. You're all pathetic and disgusting and a shame to Gryffindor House and always have been. Four on one; is that the only way you can pretend to have any kind of outstanding talent? By being bullies? The minute anyone tries to make you get the fuck away you all use Dark Lord tactics and gang up on us – I am so sick so people like you, Lupin, and your little friends – thinking you're all so – so superior just because of your – blood and your looks and – and your money. You don't control being poor or having horrid underwear or being smarter than someone else. We'll see how much you like being out-matched, you pathetic piece of– Protego!"

"Shut up! SHUT UP! You don't know anything about us! He's a lying, snivelling – little – SNEAK! " Black was vicious and mad, sending hex after hex after the equally enraged teenage girl who blocked them and sent a few of her own nasty curses back.

"Why? Because he's a Slytherin? Because he's poor or a half-blood or he's been friends with Evans longer than you have? You should've been a Slytherin, you slimy git! You're a disappointment to your House! You're a coward! You're all nothing but cowards! Confring—" By some miracle, McGonagall rushed in, horrified and quickly cast a spell that encased both the Marauders and Blake in separate bubbles.

"What is the meaning of this?"

"Why don't you ask them, Professor, why they were using Class C spells on another peer? Why don't you ask them WHY THEY ARE ALLOWED TO SEND HEXES AND CURSES AT WHOMEVER THEY LIKE IN THE CORRIDORS JUST BECAUSE OF HOUSE AFFI—"

"SHUT YOUR MOUTH!" Black roared, "WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? HE'S A SLYTHERIN! WHERE'S YOUR HOUSE PRIDE?"

"Where is your dignity? Your decency? Gryffindor is rolling in his grave, you coward!" Blake yelled back, dark purple sparks flying from the end of her wand, her hair almost sticking up with static. "You're all pathetic!"

"Silence!" Albus Dumbledore had arrived, his sky blue eyes uncommonly hard and angry as they fell on Blake. But she, rather than duck her head in embarrassment, glared back wilfully. "Ennervate."

Severus Snape groaned and another Ennervate allowed James Potter to stir back to life. Dumbledore gazed at all of them. "Miss Blake, I would like you to come and talk to me in my office."

"I'm sure you would." She retorted, her fresh green eyes still manically glinting. Then she added on snidely, as an afterthought, "Sir."

Dumbledore shot her a warning look and put a hand on her shoulder, steering her away from the scene whilst she held herself stiffly, "Boys, a trip to Madam Pomfrey would not do you any more harm, I should think."

Blake stopped moving and turned to the Marauders, the ugly red colour still high in her cheeks and glared at them, most especially Potter and Black. "By the way, Potter, remember this. Snape may be greasy or oily or whatever else it is you call him –" Here, Snape flushed hideously, but she took no notice, "— but everyone can see exactly how pathetic you are, you attention whore, and everyone can see Black's arrogance and bigotry, Pettigrew's cowardice. The only one of you who is remotely attractive might be Lupin if it were not for the streak of unusual cowardice and his freakish eyes."

Needless to say, Severus Snape had no clue what was going on, but anyone who told off the Marauders like that was – in his opinion – second to none.

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11:28 AM

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"Any particular reason you seem so intent on stalking me even during school, Deluna?" Riddle enquired of the witch who had fallen into step with him as they both headed towards Charms. He couldn't help but notice the strange pendant she was wearing as it reflected the early morning sunlight into his line of vision.

Deluna rolled her eyes and shot back, "Well, if you'd applied your reputable intelligence and actually comprehended the timetable you were given, you might have noticed that Slytherin and Hufflepuff share Defence together."

"Yes," Riddle mused, his lips taking on a wry twist, "I expected Gryffindor, to be honest. Hufflepuff was a surprising House."

"No one was more surprised than me, Riddle, I can promise you that." She flicked a wayward strand of hair behind her ear, scowling slightly before sighing, "But what's done is done, I suppose."

"There was a certain lack of that attitude yesterday," He countered, smirking, "As I'm sure the Sorting Hat would agree."

"The Hat has an awful habit of brown-nosing and doesn't seem to know what's good for it." She, surprisingly, smirked as well and her eyes twinkled with mirth and, though it was something that he would find utterly irritating, he couldn't help but give her an amused look.

"Of course." Riddle was very careful to keep a nonchalant eye on her as he threw out his next comment, "Well, Malfoy and Black seem to—admire you."

Deluna's face was expressionless as she replied seemingly carelessly, shrugging slightly, "I don't care much for blood politics, Riddle. But, they seemed friendly enough, I suppose. For a bunch of up and coming Dark Lords."

"Of course," Riddle bit out, then – tightly spoke the rest of his sentence, "I wouldn't expect anything more than for them to cater to your amusement, my Lady."

With that, he hurried his pace and left the bewildered girl in the corridor, wondering what the hell his problem was.

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4:05 PM

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"Tiring day, huh?" Moody – I should probably call him Alastor if only to distinguish him from the—eye, electric blue, madly rolling in a socket, snarling at us, constant vigilance, he says, roars, stomping his wooden leg, arm raised to cast a crucio, screaming, eye rolling across the floor, basilisk fang pocket knife embedded in his–from the Moody of my day – asked me, softly.

"Yeah, you bet. The castle is..." I trailed off, not even having to pretend to pour awe into my voice. My last few months being within my own time had been...it really was like seeing the castle for the first time. And, of course, I'd made a few interesting discoveries of my own that were bound to be useful in my one-woman crusade against the future Dark Lord.

—Tom Riddle. I can't stop thinking about his damned attitude today! I mean, yes, we're teenagers. We're hormonal. But I was actually being perfectly civil and attempting conversation, that foul, evil, snot-nosed little son of a—

"Huge?" Moo—Alastor provided, giving me a small grin. I grinned back.

"I was about to say magical, but, ah, I suppose huge fits it correctly as well." Alastor made a noise of dissent at that and I raised an eyebrow.

"Do you always have to speak so—so..."

"Eloquently?" I provided, quirking my lips.

"I was about to say snobbishly, but, ah, I suppose eloquently fits it correctly as well." Alastor mocked me, in a ridiculously high voice. He grinned, ruffling his hair a bit.

"It's the way I was brought up, I guess," At his look, I realised that he didn't think I'd finished my sentence yet, so I elucidated, "Pureblood, and all that."

"Ah."

"But, I mean, it shouldn't have been so tiresome. The day, I mean. It was all just admin work, really. Sorting out the syllabus and textbooks and all that." I commented, brushing the irritating lock of hair that had escaped my make-shift bun behind my ear. Alastor eyed the quills I'd used to pin my hair back.

"Never seen anyone use quills like that."

"Yes, I tend to be special and unique, as well as eloquent." I replied, dryly.

"How could you not be – you're Dumbles' niece!" He exclaimed and I rolled my eyes a bit. "And you're a Deluna. No wonder you have every Slytherin tripping over themselves to please you."

"What?" I asked, a bit more sharply than I meant to. Alastor shrugged it off though, and helped himself to another scoop of mashed potatoes.

"Well, I mean, look at Malfoy and Black yesterday, going up to you and bowing and all that rubbish," Alastor remarked, crinkling his nose a bit. He added, as an afterthought, "Smarmy bastards."

"That's all common courtesy; it's got nothing to do with me." I replied, a bit confused.

"Maybe," Alastor conceded, quietly.

"And what of Tom Riddle?" Bones had told me how quiet McKinnon usually was, but he honestly didn't seem all that quiet to me.

"What about Riddle?"

"You seem close to him," Shacklebolt's joined in the interrogation as well. Okay, maintain a straight face, Naomi. I reached for my pumpkin juice, suddenly wishing that I had some Lightningvodka with me instead. I told them that I'd stayed with him during the summer.

"Well, why?"

I shrugged. "My Uncle asked me to."

"Why didn't you just stay with the Professor, then?"

"There were some difficulties."

"Like?" Edgecombe's consistent prodding was really not earning her brownie points.

"Maybe you should ask him." I nearly sneered, but managed to restrain myself in time – we badgers don't sneer, after all; sugar not spice, we're everything nice.

"Why did he not leave you with a pureblood family, then?" Oh, Merlin, I hoped that she wasn't a fanatic. But – knowing my brand of luck – I had a suspicion that she was. The others didn't seem one bit surprised, so I assumed it was normal. I just told her that Albus didn't want my presence announced at the time and they, thankfully, dropped the subject.

Just as I scanned the Hall, I accidentally caught Riddle's gaze. He just—stared. Unlike his awkward staring on the train last time, this was far more contemplative, a question burning behind his gaze. Then, he blinked slowly and a smirk curved his lips, an echo of emotion, as Riddle inclined his head to me and sipped from his goblet – a mock salute.

I turned away.

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6:13 PM

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"You don't seem to be very impressed with the new addition to our school, Orion."

Orion stopped pacing and scowled at the reclining, smirking Malfoy scion. "Of course not. She's a Hufflepuff. We should've gotten her, Abraxas, and you know it."

Malfoy made a noise of dissent and leaned forward abruptly. "Yes, she's a Hufflepuff but—it's not a total loss."

"I can see where you're going with this, Abe, but I don't think it's the best idea," Malfoy raised a pale eyebrow and Alphard continued. "We can't—can't bully her into anything, you must know that. For the love of Salazar, did you see what she did to the Hat?"

"Mere accident," Malfoy waved carelessly. "It means nothing; accidental magic, she lost control of her emotions and—"

Cygnus shook his head slowly. "Abraxas, I don't think so. It was deliberate."

"I can't think she's bloody well pleased to be with that lot, can I?" Orion sneered.

"Either way, your next course of action will be to keep an eye on her," Prince added and the boys fell silent. "Deliberate or not, I'm sure the Hat's supposed to be highly protected; for her to set it on fire..."

She paused, letting the other contemplate the ramifications of that. "She's dangerous. We treat her as the enemy. Close surveillance and observation. No more but –" here, she glanced at the scowling Malfoy, "—certainly no less, either."

"Are you mad, Eileen?" Orion hissed. "She's Deluna. We treat her like an enemy and then it's our families who make us pay for insubordination. Don't take out your petty jealousy on us, Prince."

"Jealousy?" Prince repeated, incredulously, her dark red hair framing her angular face like a bloody halo. "What on earth do I have to be jealous of, Orion? She's Deluna, yes, but she's Hufflepuff and a Hufflepuff is of little use to anyone. House full of blood-traitors and mudbloods. I have no wish to be Naomi Deluna. I suggest you watch your mouth before you spout such nonsense, Orion, or I'll just remove it myself."

"You know," Malfoy started, quietly – dangerously. "At times like these, I forget why we follow your wishes, Eileen. Our blood—"

"—Your blood," She spat, dark grey eyes flashing with anger. "Is nothing without the Princes backing up your line and—"

"—Nothing? The method which you greeted the Lady last night dares to differ." Cygnus shot back and Prince flushed angrily at the reminder of her official blood status.

"Fine," She said, silkily. "If following your own heads is what you wish, so be it."

As she made her way out of the Common Room, she bumped heavily into Malfoy and gave him a smirk. "Oops. My most sincere apologies, Abraxas. I hope you're alright. You know how—clumsy I am. I always tend to...slip around you."

Malfoy paled.

It was well known that although Eileen Prince was not a genius, she was good at using what she already had and what she was already capable of to her own ends. And what she was good at was Dark magic – most especially, Dark Potions.

So yes, having Prince slip around you was never the best course of action.

"Ellie," Marianne Bulstrode started, trying to calm Prince down. "They're boys, so they're idiots. Don't listen to 'em. We could all really use your help."

Prince threw her hands up in exasperation, "She's just another girl! Contrary to popular belief, we're not all that difficult to figure out."

Suddenly, Alphard's head shot up and he snapped his fingers.

"What?" Prince asked suspiciously. Alphard merely smirked and shook his head.

"Children, children," They all scowled and glared at him but he continued cheerily. "The answer to all our problems has been right in front of our noses this whole time."

"If you'd be so kind as to share your epiphany, Alphard, then we could all glorify in your apparent genius." Malfoy drawled, leaning back in the armchair.

"Well, she's just that. She's a she."

"...Okay..."

"Look, Orion, it's really simple. She's female. And, like Ellie said, they're not all that hard to figure out, right?"

"Alphard, get to the point." Prince snapped as Bulstrode sniggered, apparently having caught onto the eccentric Black's idea.

"Alright, alright," He threw his hands up in surrender before smirking. "She's a girl, and we're all perfectly respectable, good-looking, charming, intelligent and pure males. Eh, eh?"

Malfoy glared at Alphard until he stopped his ridiculous eyebrow waggling.

He continued, seriously and with brevity, "So, we present ourselves as the most powerful and eligible options in the whole school. Think of it; one of us, one of Slytherin House, owning their own Deluna."

Black ran a hand through his hair, his own patented Black smirk in place. "Cousin, that may be the best idea you've had yet."

"It could be fun." Cygnus grinned.

"For you, perhaps." Prince said, almost pouting. "What about me?"

"You could seduce Deluna, if she turns out to swing the other way."

"...Shut up, Alphard."

"Aha! You considered it!"

"Shut up, Alphard." The Slytherins hissed in tandem as the Black heir pouted.

.

Crunchcrunchcrunch – autumn leaves crinkle – and snap, faster – faster yet towards the dull, corrugated – iron doors, screeching – s c r e e c h i ng – open wide, wide – wider and another step, step, step – dull as the weathered white. no light – lux aeterna, lumos, lumos maximus – nothing but dark engulfing and a single – bulb swinging back and forth and back – and forth, water dripping, dropping, drip, drop, drip, dr—and then silence, silence stretching across all of time and space – and a woman burning, burning shrivelling and – bittersweet ashes floating and – a man screaming forces unseen tearing him, tearing him apart – and sewing him back together and then – then – pulling him apart again like a toy soldier – dulce et decorum est...pro patria mori...— and a graceful back arching, arching up – up further – towards a light, caving as green struck – in front – once, like an embrace or a goodbye – kiss and disappears – in a shower of glittering – light –dark again. Beauty, oh such beauty, run run run into the light, pour it into all the pores and into the smile and look up, up, up further yet, feathers brushing the air, fly, fly free from death and we fly faster yet, speedier than before air beneath –

And she woke up gasping, cast a Tempus charm which told her it was 3:10 a.m. and groaned, flopping back down on the pillow. The only thought running through her mind, the only thought that could run through her mind was a simple, matter-of-fact and tired one.

Finally.