-WARNING-
The following chapter contains explicit scenes of graphic and sexual nature... while the nature of the content is mild and suggestive it is rated M anyway. if you do not wish to view such things please see chapter 12 on how do dispose of the problem in a simple, effective and highly rational manner.
-You have been warned-
I paced around the deck with the crew standing right in front of me lined up and at attention. Twilight was still hold up in the brig and my first mate Sam was behind the wheel bringing us into firewater valley which was now only minutes away. It was just a desert village. I could already feel the heat getting to me so I had packed a lot of canteens before we got on the deck.
" alright... Listen up." I said. " we have stopped at firewater valley to recruit a more sizable crew for this vessel... Now I was going to bring two of you with me and ... But I've had a change of mind." I said. " mr Sam are we close to docking yet."I said yelling over to him.
" almost captain... Give her another minute or so." He said. I looked back to the crew.
" while me and are gone you seven are to stay here and watch over the ship... Keep her up in the air... Make sure no pony gets on, if they do kill them and loot them." I said. " is this understood?"
" aye aye captain..." They all said.
" good... And one other thing." I said. " I'm sure you all know of the unicorn miss sparkle... Some may think of her as part of the crew... But she is not and I've been to lenient with her... She is our hostage and is to be treated that way." I said. I took the keys from my belt and tossed the brig key over to one of the crew members who caught it. " are you all aware of who she is?" I asked
" aye captain." They said.
"You are to watch over her closely... If she misbehaves or causes trouble... Or annoys anypony just slap her across the face... If she does then you will all suffer... That is a warning. " I looked over their faces and I could see some fear. " she has been disobedient and troublesome and must be punished... This key is an open invitation to do with her what you will... I want you seven to break her spirit... Do this and we celebrate again... Understood." I said.
" aye aye captain." They shouted out with excitement in their eyes. I looked back to mr Sam who was walking down from the bridge.
" land HO..." He said. " one of you dogs drop the anchors." He yelled out. The pony closest to the cabin underpass ran down the steps and released the two anchors. They hit the ground and we stopped. I walked to the side of the ship with Sam and I looked down at the large desert city below. This seemed like the perfect place to find a crew. The smell of hatred and evil was thick in the air... Oh yeah, this was the place.
" alright crew...the ship is yours until I return... ."
" aye captain."
" let's go." I said walking over to the edge and towards the ropes. I threw them down and we both rappelled down the side of the ship and made contact with the dry desert sand. We walked towards the town and the sand hardened and grew thicker from all theories walking around on it... Almost hardening it into stone.
We walked in and started passing buildings and other houses. We saw ponies out in the roads and in alleyways wearing armor and either dealing drugs or mugging somepony else... I decided to keep my wits about me and my weapon close to my wits. Some ponies gave me dirty looks , the kind of looks I didn't expect from bandits or my own kind.
I watched as a small pony in tight armor ran by one of the larger ponies and snatched his gold pouch from his side and quickly dashed away. The larger pony hasn't even noticed yet... Good thing my gear can only be taken of by my own if anypony tries to pickpocket me... Well they'll be in for a surprise.
" where should we start ?" I asked.
" the tavern..." He said. " it's close by... most of the ponies there are just mercenaries or hired hooves."
"and we can trust them?" i asked.
"i've been with their kind before... as long as you feed them and give them beds, they'll be loyal..." he said. "plus i believe some of the old crew has been hiding out here..."
"i don't think i remember the old crew." i said. "i didn't know i was a pirate before."
"oh you weren't..." said sam as we turned the corner onto a large street. "i meant the old raiding group we had... you were a captain for a while... but then you gave that up... said something about having to do something important... what was that by the way?"
"i don't remember..." i said. "like i said before... i woke up without my memory a month ago."
"aye... so it seems... well i'm sure you might find their ugly mugs similar in some way." said sam.
"aye... i'm sure i might." i said. we continued to walk down the large street when sam stopped in front of a large building and so did i. it was an old run down looking building stained with blood in some spots and with two creaky saloon style doors. the sound of clanging glasses and ponies yelling and cheering could be hear from inside... it sounded like the whole bar was in an uproar. gestured me to go in first and i walked in. the sight i was greeted with was one i kind of enjoyed.
there was a bar and ponies everywhere. there were tables set up all around and ponies were cheering and roaring into a large crowd. there was a crowd at the center of the room surrounding two unarmed and armorless poies fighting hoof to hoof. a good old fashioned math of fisticuffs. i could tell by their bloodied and beaten faces that they were both equally matched and the fight would end soon enough. to say the least i got excited. there were ponies throwing bits everywhere and cheering.
i started walking forward with mister sam and we entered the threshold of the bar. one of the fighter threw a punch and knocked the other guy onto the ground. he struggled to get up but couldn't and this caused the crowd to roar out in excitement. some of the ponies however who might have bet against the winner were yelling with anger and hatred. the loser was dragged off the ring and thrown out of the crowd while the winner did a victory lap and sat down next to a cute mare and took a drink of beer. that seemed rather nice
"ah the circle..."said mr. sam. "also one of the reasons i chose the tavern... the entertainment." he looked over at the ring and then back at me. "i can tell you're itching to have a run at it." he said.
"i am..." i replied. i took off my hat and duster... then my armor. "here hold my things." i said.
"aye aye captain." replied sam. i walked over completely undressed and unarmed now with the exception of my mask which stayed on. i got to the crowd and started pushing my way through as a large more... rotund, pony stood on top of a box with a large cigar in his mouth.
"alright... who's next who's next..." said the pony. "we'll put the stakes at 50 bits... who's going who's going." he said.
"i'll go." said one pony before i could.
"alright a fighter... we need a challenger... any challengers." he said. i just moved forward and stepped into the circle unannounced. the crowd looked at me with curiosity. they seemed to quiet down but only slightly.
"i'll have a go." i said calmly. i was up against a lean athletic looking stallion... maybe even just a colt... he seemed rather young. and i was pretty old if i had to guess... at least in my forties.
"alright we got a challenger... uh..." the announcer stopped. "buddy you gotta take off the mask." he said. i shrugged and reached up to the mask. i pulled the mask off and the glowing behind it stopped and i pulled it down to reveal my face. the once roaring crowd now faded into a strange silence. then there were only whispers and strange looks. i could tell the kid seemed a bit nervous. but the crowd soon started to pick back up. "alright... the stakes are at 50 bits."
"make the stakes 2000 bits." said the fighter. "i can take this old fossil." you're going to regret those words kid.
"woah... 2000 bits it is then... challenger are you up for that." said the announcer. i just gestured for him to move on. "we got a match folks." he said. "now remember no biting, no weapons, and no throwing... with that said... let the fight begin." he said. almost right after the fight was signaled by the sound of a bell ringing in the crowd and the kid started shuffling around trying to make an opening with his hooves up. he was looking at me w=like he was some kind of champion fighter... punk. he quickly dashed in and threw a few punches. only one hit me and it was to the chest... this kid was weak... i'm sure he's fragile too... lets test that.
he went and threw another punch. this time i moved forward at him but instead of meeting him head on i slipped to the left and soon i was beside him. for a moment time seemed to slow down. i glanced over and looked at him and he did to me. i bucket out my back right leg and shot it out. it flew out and hit the kid right in his leg. the bone snapped in half like a twig and filled the air with a horrible crunching sound. the bone didn't stop there and proceeded to fly further and rip past his skin and fur. there was a splatter of blood and he hit the floor screaming in pain and clasping his leg. needless to say the crowd grew silent. the only sound was the kids screaming.
i turned around to face him and walked over. he tried crawling away in fear and pain but there was no hope. i walked over and placed my front hoof on the side of his neck and pressed down with a bit of force. he yelled out and looked up at me with fear.
"no... no please." he bagged. i leaned down close to him and looked him in the face.
"i may be old... but i'm certain that i'll be outliving you." i said. with that out of the way i released some of the pressure from his neck and he seemed to be relieved... wrong. i immediately put all my pressure on his neck and crushed his spine. the air filled with a horrible crunch and snap. he twitched a bit but then fell silent and still. his eyes were empty and soulless and stared forward... he was dead. i looked over the crowd and they looked at me with strange faces. they soon broke out into an uproar.
"there we have it folks... the outcome you knew would happen... scar wins..."said the announcer... so they do know who i am. he walked over and handed me a bag of money while a few ponies grabbed the stallions body and dragged it away. i took the money and left the crowd. the fights continued and i joined Mr. Sam at the bar. i walked over and put all my gear back on including my mask afterwards. the fiery transformation made a few people jump and look over in surprise and awe but after a while that stopped and they returned to the fights.
"thats was a good fight captain." said sam.
"thank you... looks like i do still have some recognition here... though i'm not sure how much it will help us."
"i'm sure it'll all play out." said sam. "in the meantime relax... have a drink or something." i just smiled and gestured the bar mare for a drink. she smiled and quickly pulled a bottle from the counter and slid it over. i popped the top and started drinking. i could tell it was watered down but i didn't care... it was still good nonetheless. i finished half the bottle and sam stood up.
"where are you off to?" i asked.
"to go get you're crew... you may not remember them but i can go and hunt down the old crew for ya." he said.
"alright... i'll sit here and look important." i said taking another swig of ale. he smiled and went off into the bar disappearing behind the crowd. i let out a sigh and quickly downed the rest of the booze. i gestured to the bar mare. "hey sweetie... how about another drink... this time something that ain't watered down if you would." i said. she seemed a little disheveled at my statement and passed me a bottle of beer with a nasty look before turning away. "thanks sweetie." i said. i popped off the top and started drinking it down. it wasn't very strong but at least it wasn't watered down.
about an hour passed and it was about 2:00 by the time i had finished that bottle and another. i couldn't really concentrate and i was pretty drunk. i couldn't help but drink... it was the only thing that made the pain and confusion go away... so i reluctantly ordered another beer and started drowning that down... the beers didn't come in bottle but in large jugs so just three drinks was quite a bit. before i knew it i could feel a pair of hooves on my back and it made me jump in surprise.
"hey there captain." said a female voice. the phrase hit a nerve in my head and made me start thinking of twilight. and before i knew it a light brown mare with purple hair spun around and sat down on my lap smiling at me. she had long hair with bangs in the front and a horn on top of her head. every time i saw here the image of twilight flashed in my head. she smiled at me with want in her eyes as she batted her eyelashes. all i could see was that purple unicorn on my ship... it almost hurt to look at the mare.
"ugh... what do you want." i said trying not to freak out by not looking at her... but it was hard when she's sitting right on my lap so i had to deliberately turn my head away from her.
"just wanted to see how you were doing... saw you're fight and i heard you were the captain of a huge ship..." she said. "i hope the huge ship isn't compensating for something." she said biting her lip and rubbing her hoof across my chest. i can't deal with this right now... i'm really drunk and mentally unstable... i have no control over what my ead is seeing right now and it's driving me crazy.
"please... i need to-" i said before i was cut off.
"hey... hey violet... what are you doing with this guy... he's a drunk bastard... get back over here." said a deep and burly stallion voice from behind me. i looked back to see a large hulking stallion walking over. the mare on my lap seemed angry at him.
"damnit silver..." said the mare. "i told you we're done." she said... this can't be happening right now. the mare jumped off my lap and walked over to the stallion. they started arguing and arguing and the more they talked the more my head hurt. i clasped my head and tried to force the pain out but it wasn't working. soon two other stallions and another mare walked over and added fuel to the fire behind me. they grew louder and louder right behind me and i couldn't take it anymore.
they soon just became a blur of noise and confusion. it started bringing up evil emotions inside of me and i couldn't help but having flashes of evil thoughts run through my mind. they were right behind me too. literally only an inch away from me arguing about something that probably doesn't even matter. my headache kept getting worse and worse and the violent thoughts in my head grew more and more gruesome and evil... but then a single picture of twilight flashed through my head for what seemed like a minute and something inside of me snapped... i was flushed over with unbelievable rage and hatred.
i pushed off of the bar stool and broke through the circle of arguing ponies. i whiped out my tomahawk and brought it up under the huge stallions jaw and up through his chin and skull. i pulled it out and slashed one of the mares across the face before anypony had time to react. when they did one of the stallions went to grab me and i quickly spun around and chopped his hoof off and then sent another blow to his ribs with the spike. i turned again and dug the blade of my axe into the neck of the third stallion and the mare from before just looked over with horror in her eyes... so did the bar.
i reached over to the bar and picked up my jug of booze. i took a drink and smashed it onto the floor. he mare started slowly pacing backwards as i loomed over to her closer and closer with my axe hanging from my hoof. all i could see was twilight's face inside of hers. she was even wearing similar armor to that of what twilight was wearing. the most of the tavern looked over. even the fight was paused to watch what was going on. some of the ponies turned away and ignored it. i kept slowly chasing her back until she bumped up against a wall and pressed herself against it.
"please... no." she said sinking down onto the ground and kneeling with her hooves covering her face. i grabbed her hooves and picked her up and held her up.
"your lucky..." i said in a low voice... almost like i was in some kind of trance, i didn't even know what i was saying. "i thought for a second i loved you." i said as if this mare was twilight... i think i was going crazy. "but in reality i do... i have feeling for you... but you also make me SICK." i said in a low grudging voice. i emphasised the word 'sick' by burrowing my axe deep into her skull. her blood splattered everywhere and i let her go as i pulled my axe out of her face. she fell to the ground in a dead bloody heap and i could feel my sanity partially returning... though not all the way.
i looked around and saw all the ponies looking at me with strange looks. some were in horror, some thrilled that they saw some action, and others looked away. i shook my head and walked out of the bar and back outside. i walked down the street keeping my head low and i stopped when i got to a nice empty and shady alleyway. i walked into the cool shade and deep into the alleyway. a sat down and leaned against one of the building and let out a deep sigh as i took off my hat which was laced with sweat now... as was I.
"what's wrong..." said a familiar female voice beside me. i turned over and nearly had a heart attack when i saw twilight sparkle sitting next to me against the wall smiling at me with ehr big purple eyes.
"what... but- how... you're on the ship... how are... but... why?" i said i asked why because i wanted to know what was happening to me.
"something's troubling you... what is it." she asked. i didn't want to say anything. it must be a trick or something, the alcohol, the desert eat... or am i going crazy.
"i... i-i must be going crazy." i said leaning away from twilight as if she was a venomous snake ready to lunge out and bite me. "you can't be here... you're on the ship."
"crazy or not i'm here." she said. "might as well get used to it."
"why... why did my mind chose you to be my guide through insanity." i said not knowing what i was really talking about.
"i wouldn't guess guide... but you might be right about the insanity thing... and i don't know why you're mind did it... it is you're mind... not mine." she said.
"but we have to share a mind if you came from my mind." i said.
"i guess you're right." she said giggling. " why do you have to do that." she said.
"what." i asked.
"why are you hiding you're feelings." she asked.
"i'm not hiding anything." i said getting angry at her... or me... or whatever.
"see... denial... you don't even want to admit it." she said.
"shut up." i said blocking my ears. but it didn't help, her voice came through as clear as it has before.
"you're so stubborn you wouldn't even take advice from you're own head..." she said again.
"shut up!" i said louder now.
"you need to find what you really want or your just going to run a circle around a pile of lies..."
"SHUT UP..."
"AND CONFUSION..." she yelled.
"NOOO."i said closing my eyes and pressing my hooves against my head. there was a loud buzzing in my ears and i got a splitting headache and the world around me seemed to change... then it stopped. i opened my eyes... and i was alone in this alleyway. there was no twilight... there wasn't even proof she was here... all there was were just a few ponies looking at me from the streets like i was a freak or something... i can't blame them. for the first time today... i don't feel mad. the only thing i hate right now is myself... i can't let this persuade me... it's just my mind playing tricks on me... it's just the heat and the booze.
"i remember the old you..." said a voice echoing in my head... it was her again. "you used to be the greatest pony equestria had ever seen... now you've become a monster." said her voice as it slowly echoed away into silence. now i know not to trust myself. i have no idea what that meant but despite my memory loss i know there was no way in the world i could have been the greatest pony equestria had ever seen... i let out the deepest sigh a pony in my position could let out.
i looked back around the alleyway and saw that a few ponies were coming in through each side. they looked menacing. infact, there were at least ten of them. they all walked over and surrounded me. i kept sitting but put my hoof on my axe. they looked down at me with confusion and interest. it was like they had been looking for somepony and they think it might be me. i honestly hope they just go away and leave me alone.
"are you scar?" one of them asked.
"yes..." i said looking up at him with my glowing mask. he looked back at me with a glare. then to my shock he started smiling with the rest. it wasn't an evil diabolical 'they want me to suffer' smile, it was more like a 'hey hows it been, i haven't seen you in years' kind of smile.
"ha ha scar you magnificent bastard you." he said grabbing my hoof and picking me up off the ground and onto my hooves. he pulled me in for a hug and the others started cheering and laughing. "it's about time you came back... we were getting bored sitting out in the desert."
"who... what?" i asked curiously still ready to chop off this guys head if its a rouse.
"yeah... sam said you would say that..." he said. "c'mon scar... it's us... the old crew." he said bringing a smile to my face that made me forget about my problems from before.
"holy crap..." i said they cheered and the stallion let me go. "that was quick... were there only this few of you."
"scar you bastard... of course not... the rest are still looking around for you..." he said. i straightened up and smiled with a new sense of courage... but i only had this courage because of the crew... there were still a few unresolved demons in my stomach.
"great... go tell them to be aboard the ship by nine tonight..." i said. "i've still got some business to take care of... boys we're gonna have a hell of a party tonight." i said cheering them up and making them roar out in joy. they walked out and started chanting my name. i smiled and just waved as they walked away through the town... well at least they'll be loyal to me. i'm glad they're gone.
i don't really have important business to take care of... i just want to sit here in self loathing for a while before i have to go. i sat back down against the wall and put my hooves on each side of my head. i felt a bit happy and comforting but i still had so many problems to deal with right now... the biggest one is that i'm emotionally unstable. i reached into my bags and pulled out a bottle of scotch i had been keeping in there. i undid the top and started drinking again.
i don't know why but the drinking made me feel more and more self conscious and only made me worse. i thought it would go away if i just kept drinking but i was wrong and it only made things worse. i drank myself into such a state of self consciousness that i thought i was going to start crying. i couldn't see straight and i kept hearing voices in the back of my head. i felt like everypony in the world was staring at me and judging me silently. i tried to keep my spirits up by thinking of happy thoughts.
well... i've got the strongest ship in the world... i have a loyal and wonderful crew. i kept thinking and thinking of more and more things. i'm going to be filthy rich with all the town and villages i'm going to raid. i've got this awesome mask to protect me from almost every danger. i kept thinking and thinking. i cheated death three times in a month. i broke out of the canterlot dungeons and survived a horrible shipwreck. i had plenty of things to be proud about... and i've also singlehoofedly avoided the wrath of celestia more than enough times.
as i kept thinking about more and more things i started to regain my self respect and sat up a little straighter. i put the scotch back and started to regain my posture and poise... as well as i could though, i was completely smashed from the beers at the bar and the scotch i just halved. i leaned my head against the side on the building and looked up to the sky. i could see the light blue sky past the narrow strip of the two buildings.
i went to stand up but i was so unbelievably drunk that i just fell back down. i started to feel like i would pass out and i thought i was going to for a second. but almost like a miracle i could feel an unknown strength pull me up to my feet as i stood up on my own power. i looked at myself and the first thing i noticed was that my armor was now glowing bright red were the symbols are. they glowed brighter and brighter and quietly hummed. i could feel my sobriety returning as i began to think straight and gain more control of my body. and soon the glowing stopped and i wasn't drunk anymore... that was weird. but it was also awesome.
i stood there for a moment in shock and minor disbelief but i soon got over it and realized that its just another strange thing. like everything else that i seem to see. i let out another depressingly happy sigh and walked out of the alleyway and back into the road. as i started walking i looked up and saw twilight. she was walking in front of me with her back turned. i blinked and she was gone... but now she was right next to me. smiling and walking like i wasn't even there. i didn't want to blink in fear of her disappearing but a pickpocketer ran past me between twilight and me. he disappeared and twilight with him.
and again she appeared as a sales pony in a stall handing a stallion a few items. but then like before i blinked and the sales pony wasn't twilight anymore but some other stallion. there was no doubt in my mind that i was going insane. i looked over and she was standing in an alleyway watching me but was gone as i passed the and over i kept seeing her everywhere i looked. there was no escape, no achievable end to this suffering.
when i thought it couldn't get worse i was proven wrong. all of a sudden everything around me faded to blackness. its like somepony painted everything over with black paint, even the sky, it wasn't darkness, everything was just black, even all the ponies were gone. i looked around and i turned back behind me to see twilight standing there and smiling at me. i turned around to see her and she just turned and started walking away. i quickly trotted up to her and walked behind her.
"what are you?" i asked... silence. "tell me."
"if only you knew..." she said.
"knew what?" i asked.
"you were the only one who could help." she said. i still followed her and she took an immediate right turn despite the lack of obstacles.
"i don't understand... tell me now." i demanded.
"so lost... so confused... no direction in life, nowhere to go, only blinding rage and pointless violence." she said.
"WHAT IS THIS" i yelled trying to get a straight answer from her.
"why must there be so much hatred... why must ponies hate in the first place... there's no good in it... only suffering and pain... so much pain... that's all there is in the end... pain... unlike any other." she said in a strange almost demonically monotone voice. it was scary almost how she looked forward without blinking or emotion.
"answer my question first." i said.
"in time... you will know... methods... numbers... the stone... the blade... the hero... you know what others can't know..." she said. i was becoming seriously confused now. my head was starting to pound and everything seemed to speed up. i just followed her and i was scared. i didn't know what was happening.
"what is this." i said almost pleadingly. i was afraid for a rare occasion. i didn't understand anything and i was angry. at first i thought i was angry at twilight... but this isn't twilight, this is myself. so i'm angry at myself... i must know something but this fucking amnesia is keeping it from me.
"July 18th... 2156." she said. what...how... that's not even a possible date. there's no way that can mean anything. it hasn't happened yet and there's no way i'll live long enough to be there when it does happen. i wanted to yell out but soon she faded away into the darkness. and soon after the darkness faded and colors and lights shone through all around. everything became real again and i was in the city again. i looked around to see i was in an alleyway with a few other ponies who were staring at me with interest but confusion.
"yo dude... what drugs have you been doing." he said... yo dude?
"uh... nothing." i said. "i don't do any drugs." i said walking quickly out of the alleyway and back into the town. i kept walking down the road and still i could constantly see twilight's face and shape walking around and taking form. she would keep saying the word 'Remember' which constantly rang inside of my head like a bell. i tried to drown it out with my own thoughts but i couldn't concentrate my own thoughts... i could only see her. i started running and then sprinting hoping to get away but there was no hope. soon enough i realized it was getting dark and i was close to the ship. i looked up and saw some hope in the comfort of the ship.
i spread my wings and flew right up to the top. i zoomed through the air and right onto the ship. i looked down to see the ship scuttling with crew members now instead of the usual seven there were many. i landed right down onto the ship and i got an immediate response from the crew. i looked back to see them and i could see twilight weaving in and out of the crowd of ponies giving me a strange smile. i immediately rushed into my quarters and slammed the door shut. and looked around the room. the bedroom door was open. i quickly ran over and closed it. i looked back and the room was still empty.
i rested up against the door looking everywhere in the room. i didn't want to look away, turn around, or even blink. i didn't want her to be here. i didn't want to be tormented like this anymore. every time i see her its like something clawing at the inside of my brain. its like she's all my memories laid out in front of me but i can't have them... i just can't have peace. why her... why must it be her... what kind of fresh hell has been forced upon me now?
i just sat there looking through the room making sure everything was visible. it helped me gain some of my sanity back not having to see her. but i tried not to blink as much as possible for the fear she would appear in front of me and haunt me. whenever i did blink i was always hesitant to open my eyes and every time was the same rush. i felt like i had already sweat off 15 pounds and i couldn't stop breathing heavily. even though she wasn't here the constant fear of her finding me was almost as bad. just then there was a knock on the door and i jumped. i didn't go for it... if it was somepony else they would call in.
"captain... are you alright?" said a familiar voice. it was sam's voice... it felt so good to know i don't have to be alone now... i shouldn't have kept myself in here. i rushed to the door and opened it up. it was him... and not a trick or something.
"ah sam... good good... it should be close to nine now... help me get the booze out from my office." i said rushingly trying to keep conversation going.
"uhm... alright captain." he said. he looked at me as we walked to the office and i opened the door. he gave me a strange look like there was something wrong... except this time there was... but he doesn't need to know. "captain are you feeling alright... you're sweating like hell." he said.
"yes yes..." i said. "i'm fine... the heats just getting to me... this armor is a bit thick." i said.
"i'm sure a few cold beers will soak up that sweating." he said. i just smiled weakly and we started grabbing bottles of booze from the shelf in here and putting them in small wooden boxes. once we had enough we brought them out to the front of the den.
"so how many shipmates do we have now?" i asked.
"the ships full." he said. "64 buccaneers for the cannons, two each cannon, 8 deck hooves, and 4 cabin colts as well as two chefs and two scouts... its a full crew... right down to the last bed." that statement brought a smile to my face despite my current situation.
"good... good." i said. "get them on the deck... this calls for a celebration." i said. i walked up onto the bridge as mr/ sam gathered the ponies onto the deck and they all cluttered the deck smiling. it wasn't until now that i noticed we were heading back on our original destination... westward. the crew lined up on the deck and i looked over them with a smile on everyponies faces.
"they're all yours captain scar." said mr. sam. i smiled and walked over to the edge of the bridge and they cheered and roared. i raised a hoof and they settled down but were still at a murmur and ready to blow up.
"my fellow brutes," some of the ponies cheered. "bandits." more cheered. "cutthroats" more cheered. "and general criminals." they all cheered. "tonight i bring you together in a grand era... the era of scar." i said, they all cheered again. "this is the mightiest vessel there has ever been... and it has an equally mighty crew..." i gestured to the crew. "there is no doubt that we will grow to be the strongest bandit force in the world..."
" scar scar scar." they started chanting. i raised my hooves and settled them down.
"it is my vision however that this mighty vessel will be the head of a grand bandit fleet... reigning destruction and chaos over all of the world... but this will of course take time... but that's time worth spending... i can promise you anything... money, beer, mares, food, and a place to sleep... all i ask in return is you're loyalty and dedication... if you cannot give me thes things... then we have a problem... is there anypony who would like to leave the crew." i asked. the whole crew was silent. "thats what i like to hear... lets get this party started boys." i said.
they all roared out and i jumped down from the bridge onto the deck with a thud as my hooves hit the ground. the booze were passed around and everypony started drinking and having fun. we even had a few crew members who had instruments with them and were playing them while others danced and drinked. there was hoof wrestling, drinking games, cards, everything you would think that would happen on a ship was happening. the cool night breeze and the cool beer was really keeping my sweating at bay.
we all had fun and had a feast. we had a lot of food that the cooks made and more wine. to my shock this barely put a dent in our supplies. we all sat at the deck and the ponies would tell stories of our old heists and robberies as a crew. i couldn't recall any of them but i nodded and laughed nonetheless. after hearing the stories i couldn't help but see how i ended up getting my title. it wasn't too long before the crew started turning in as it was well past midnight now. soon it was just down to me, mr. sam, and several other crew members.
it wasn't long after that until it was just me and sam now finishing up our drinks. he had a few sips left but i had a a bit left and ever since what happened earlier today i've been sipping it up little by little like wine. the cold night breeze felt good even though the ship was generating its own heat some of the night coolness managed to get through. i was already feeling pretty drunk but i could still think straight... well straight enough. sam downed the rest of his bottle and chucked it over the side of the ship with a smile. i smiled to in my drunk fluster.
"you know... i never told you this... but you're a great guy as far as bandits come." he said. he was a bit off his edge but i could tell that he knew what he was saying.
"thanks sam." i said taking another sip.
"i mean it." he said getting up. "you treat the crew well and you're the most cold blooded killer out there... i don't know how you do it... but i think it's what's great about you."
"sam you're drunk..." i said chuckling to myself.
"that may be true." he said. "but i mean this... i'm not sure how you do it... you're the kindest but cruelest bandit i know... i don't know how you do it..." he said. i started laughing in a drunken haze again. "i think i'll be turning in now." he said.
"good night sam." i said. he walked over to the stairs and saluted over to me as he disappeared down the stairs. once he was gone i let out a deep sigh and finished off the rest of my booze and threw the bottle over the side of the ship. once again the ship was filled with a longing silence. i let out another sigh and stood up. i got my bearing and started walking down to the lower deck.
i walked down and the entire deck was asleep. there were a few ponies in hammocks but they were out cold. i walked down to the second level of the brig and the same could be said here too. i walked over to the food storage but i stopped and turned to face the brig. i looked over and saw the cell twilight was held up in... to be honest i don't think she had a lot of fun. the crew did what i thought they would do but with a much larger turnout.
she laid messy and sprawled out on the hard wooden floor with her private parts revealed. she and the cell were both soaked in semen and other sexual fluids. she was covered head to hoof in cum and her pussy and ass were spread wide apart. it almost hurt to look at her like this but i tried my best to stay angry at her... but i don't know why i was so angry... and why at her... she hasn't done anything. but i can't admit that, i don't want to admit that, i want this to be her fault so i can find peace in myself but i can't... she can't be blamed. i leaned forward and hit my head against the bars in frustration. she seemed to spring to life and look at me.
"no please... please no more... please." she said almost crying and backing away as she covered her genitals. she had tears rolling down her face that tried to wash away the mess.
"i don't want to hurt you." i said showing her my face as i turned a torch on nearby. she seemed even more sad and confused.
"why would you do this." she said through her tears. i wanted to yell or something.
"because... i... well..." i wanted to blame her but i couldn't... i couldn't find the words to do it. "i don't know..." i said.
"how do you not know." she said yelling with pain filled tears. "why... what did i ever do?" she asked in between sobs and cries.
"nothing." i said after letting out a big sigh. i fell to the ground with my head pressed against the bars and i looked at the ground not having the heart to look at her. any hatred i felt towards her now is gone and i felt only self pity and regret. "you didn't do anything... you've only been suffering." i said. "i admit i felt feelings for you that i didn't want to feel... and that made me confused and angry... and i took it out on you... i went too far."
she didn't answer. she just kept her head down and curled up into a ball and started crying. it was a silent crying. not like a childs loud wailing when he doesn't get what he wants but instead it was a silent remorseful crying... like at a funeral. i couldn't help but feel a few tears falling from my own face and falling down past my mask. and then i did the one thing i thought i would never do, nor would i hope anypony would catch me doing this... i cried too.
i started weeping silently with my head against the bars. i didn't know what was wrong. it was like i was some kind of good person on the inside trapped by a shell of evil. i had to sit and watch the evil kill everything around me. i can't explain why i was crying now... i just was. everything was so confusing and i was scared and i didn't know were i wanted to go or what i wanted. instead of turning that into anger like i always do i turned it into tears. i had to anger to fuel with my feelings... so the next best thing was depression.
"i'm sorry twilight..." i said. "i don't know what i'm doing... i let my life run on hatred... i still can't believe i would ever be such an evil pony... i just don't find it possible... but i have the black heart and the anger to be such a cruel pony... but i've got more than just that... and those feelings are constantly clawing at my head... driving me insane." i said "i can't take it anymore... the pain the voices the images, they won't stop... all day it's been nothing but reminder after reminder of what i've done wrong... and i always feel like i regret my decisions no matter what they were... i can't take it anymore."
i felt like i was going to scream but before i could i felt something press against my head. i looked over to see twilight was leaning against the bars with her head pressed up against them were mine was. she looked at me with pity and tears of pain. i looked at her the same way but my pity was directed towards myself. i felt regret and shame for this... i don't think i can ever truly let this down. we just stared at each other and it seemed to make everything alright at the moment. but i didn't want to look away and face the cruel reality of life.
"twilight... i'm sorry... can you forgive me?" i asked. she looked at me and a few more tears welled up in her eyes.
"no..." she said. "i can't... you don't know what it's like... not just the rape... but because you allowed for them to do this to me... i can't forgive you... nor do i think i love you anymore... you were right... it was just something wrong with me... but i see now that you are a horrible monster inside and out." she said. this brought fresh tears to my eyes as i tried to hold back my crying. she herself went back to crying in the corner. i got up and walked away trying to hold back all of my tears but i couldn't do it too well and i ended up trailing tears all the way back up to the deck. before i got to the deck i stopped and swallowed my pride and sorrow. i need things to be right... what the fuck is going on with me.
i raced back down to the brig and twilight looked up at me with hatred and spite inside of her eyes. i looked at her with sorrow and self pity and grabbed the keys hanging up on a support beam behind me. i unlocked the cell and walked in. she just back up and curled into a ball.
"twilight please."
"no... leave me alone... i have had it with you... all you've done is make me suffer and i hate you." she said. those words stung like a knife but i kept strong and walked forward. "what are you doing... fuck off, let me go." she said. i picked her up and carried her on my back. she struggled but i carried her up to the deck and she would thrash and i had to hold her down with my wings. we finally got up to the deck and we went into the captains quarters. i placed her down and closed the door.
"please just listen..." i said.
"no... let me out of here." she said.
"i want you to stay in here tonight." i said. "clean up... and use this to unlock the ring on you're horn." i said tossing her the magic key to unlock the ring. she looked at it with confusion and shock.
"stop playing these games." she said. "let me go."
"it's not a game... dammit no more games... just fucking go wash up and be happy dammit." i said yelling at her. she seemed taken away that i wanted her to be so happy i would yell at her to do so.
"but if i unlock my horn aren't you afraid i'll teleport away." she said grabbing it and using it to loosen the ring and slip it off.
"i'm sure you will..." i said. "then celestia will find us and burn the ship down and us with her fiery wrath." i said. "she'll probably salvage me only to torture me and then make a public execution... probably the old beheading." i said smiling a chuckling a bit in a blur of dementia.
"why are you doing this..." she asked.
"because i'm done... i can't do this anymore." i said.
"what?"
"i'm going insane... voices in my head keep telling me to remember... i just can't... no matter how hard i try i can't and my mind is torturing me to remember... i'll probably end up jumping off the side of the ship if celestia doesn't get to me first." i said "either or works for me... but i want my crew to get out of this unscathed... so i might just jump and save them all the trouble... and to think after all this work."
"but... you can't think about suicide... what happened to those big plans of yours. "said twilight.
"i never had any plans..." i said. "my goal was to go west... to go fucking west... i don't even know what the fuck IS west... could be anything." i said. i watched as twilight used her magic and in a flash she was clean and neat looking.
"but... you can't just give up." she said.
"why do you care..." i said. "i thought you hated me... you have more than every right to hate me... i hate myself and i'm not the victim here... all i ever do is hate... but i don't want to hate and kill anymore... i don't want to hurt innocent ponies and rob them... i thought i did but the more i thought about it i realized that even though i can have what i want, i don't always want what i have."
"you can't just end it all." said twilight. "yes i may have hated you... then i do realize the syndrome i developed but i can't say i was totally wrong... i knew there was good in you... i told you and you're evil ego pushed those thoughts away... i always knew." she said.
"i had a feeling you would say that... and you probably hate me now." i said. "and i'm sure that you would love to kill me right now." i said. "just grab a knife and start stabbing me through the slots between the metal plates... i won't care." i said.
"i would love to cut you open more than anything right now..." she said. "but i can't... i couldn't bring myself to it."
"great..." i said. i turned my head to the open study and saw the shelves of alcohol. i got up and walked over. "i'm going to go drink myself to death." i said. "i think that would be the best way to go out." i walked over to the alcohol and popped open one of the bottles. i put it to my lips and started chugging it down. but soon the bottle flew out of my hands and so did the other bottles from the shelf. twilight used her magic to take them all away.
"i'm not going to stand here and watch you drink you're way to death." she said.
"then don't... go..." i said. "fucking go, i just gave you the keys to you're freedom... get the fuck off my ship." i said already feeling the affects of the alcohol i just drank. i pulled off my mask and let it drop to the ground. i soon took off my other gear as well until i was clothesless. i wanted to be sort of free for my battle with death... besides i don't need those anymore.
"i'm not going... and i'm not going to let you die." she said.
"what is you're problem... are you fucked up in the head again..." i said. "i just sicked seven of my crew mates on you all day today and now i'm trying to kill myself and you're stopping me... what is you're problem."
"my problem is that i know you're better than this." she said. "everypony else may have given up on you... but there's a strange presence about you... i don't know what it is but i know you're different... you're something else." she said.
"twilight just shut up and give me back the beer." i said. she looked at me with a glare as i walked over.
"no..." she said. "i won't let you kill yourself. i went to grab it but she pulled it away. she held it and i went to take it from her. in my drunken state there wasn't much i could do against her.
"damnit twilight stop this." i said. she kept resisting and her horn glowed. she used her magic to pick me up and hold me in the air. she turned me upside down and dropped me on my head. i went out like a light and fell into darkness. i slowly slipped away and i could see was twilight's face mocking me and haunting me with her silence and indifference.
why can't things be easy...
-Authors Note: alright guys i'm not going to say much about this chapter for now but i think it came out pretty good and the insanity clause helps too. as some of you have heard there is a huge blizzard approaching the Boston and Massachusetts area of the U.S.A.. i unfortunately live in this area and the storm will be upon us tomorrow. this may be the last time you guys hear from me for a while should we loose power. for anybody who is reading this and lives in the north east i wish you luck and hope you all brave the storm... i'll see you bro's whenever. stay shady.-End of Note-