All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer; I just like to play with her characters..

No copyright infringement is intended.

HUGE thanks to my lovely betas and prereader - darcysmom, twimom817 and EdwardsMyObsession. Without these ladies, this wouldn't be worth reading.

Never Let Go

Chapter Twelve

Happy 15th Birthday – Edward Cullen

I cheered as I saw Edward's name scroll across the marquee at Safeco Field. Carlisle and Esme had practically gone all out reserving a skybox so we could all attend the game and celebrate Edward's birthday. Jasper, Emmett, Alice, Rosalie, Dad, and I all gathered around as Esme lit the candles on the cake and we all sang.

"Make a wish," I whispered as Edward blew out the candles.

Edward grinned widely and I couldn't help but smile back at him.

It felt so good to be back in Forks. Edward and I spent nearly every day together, usually at his house or in La Push at First Beach. Esme was gracious enough to cart us around wherever we wanted to go. I only had a couple days after Edward's birthday before I had to go back to Phoenix. I had mixed feelings about going back – I was excited about music camp, but I hated to leave as usual.

After Edward and I had our chat after our sports banquets, I spent a lot of time thinking about how I could make it up to Edward without him really knowing about it. I knew that the one thing he wanted the most was for me to move back to Forks – so I made a decision; at the end of my sophomore year I'd move back to Forks.

Mom and Phil were planning to get married over spring break, and it would be the perfect opportunity to give them some time together without a teenager under their roof. I had heard somewhere that the first three years of marriage were the hardest, and I thought I'd make it a little easier on them.

So, for Edward's birthday, I made him a card. Inside it read:

June 1996

I promise.

Happy Birthday,

Love,

Bella

I knew that my words wouldn't be lost on Edward. The look on his face when he opened his card was priceless.

"Really?" He asked.

I nodded.

He picked me up in his arms and spun me around – the smile never leaving his handsome face.

"Boy, that must have been one helluva birthday card." Emmett chuckled.

Esme picked up the card from where it sat on the table.

"June 1996? What happens in June of next year?"

I looked over to see a wide smile on my Dad's face just as big and bright as the one Edward wore.

"Bella's moving back to Forks, Mom." Edward answered.

"You are?"

I nodded.

"Oh, honey! That is wonderful! I'm so happy."

Esme wiped the tears from her face before pulling me out of Edward's arms and into hers.

"Thank you, Bella." She whispered. "You've answered his prayers."

~.NLG.~

"See you at Christmas!" I hollered as I waved goodbye to my Dad.

Carlisle, Esme and Edward were driving me to Seattle so I could catch my plane back to Phoenix.

This time our parting wasn't filled with the doom and gloom all our other ones were. It wasn't a goodbye - not really. This time it was a 'see ya later'. Edward got what he finally needed from me - a definite answer as to when I'd be coming back.

"Good luck at baseball camp, Slugger." I whispered as Edward pulled me into a hug.

"Thanks, Boo. You have a good time at music camp and learn a lot. I expect you to take notes and share your secrets."

I giggled.

"I can't keep any secrets from you, Eddie."

"I wouldn't expect anything less."

I hugged Edward tightly once more and took my bag from him.

"Call me when you get home, Bella."

I nodded and walked toward my gate. I settled down into my seat and breathed a sigh of relief that I'd only have to make this trip a couple more times before I could stay indefinitely. I'd also resolved that I'd make an attempt to come up and see Edward play. Yeah, I'd have the last two years of high school to see him play in plenty of games, but I didn't want to take anything for granted.

I had one day between the time I came home from Forks and the time I was supposed to leave for summer music camp. In that day, I had to do laundry, pack my things for camp and organize my bedroom so I could pack it up when I got home. Phil had asked us to move in with him when the lease on our apartment was up. I couldn't argue. My piano was ther,e and it took the same amount of time to walk to Phil's from school as it did to walk to the apartment. We spent so much time there it seemed silly not to move.

"Got everything all packed up?" Mom asked from the doorway.

"Yeah, I think so."

"You're not even gone yet and I miss you already, sweetie."

"Mom ..."

"I'm serious, Bella. You're growing up so fast. I can't believe you're going to be fifteen in September. Where has the time gone?"

To me, time hadn't seemed like it had gone fast at all. In fact, it seemed like it had passed at a snail's pace.

"I mean it, Bella ... You're going to be gone all summer and you'll be home in time to start training for volleyball - then school will start and the madness begins. I feel like I won't get to spend any time with you and before we know it June will be here and you'll be going back to live with your Dad."

"Mom ... you're getting married in April. You and Phil won't need me here to worry about. You need a chance to make a life together. I won't be gone forever - I'll come back to visit just like I do with Dad now."

"Oh, sweetie, I just don't want you to end up like me. Falling in love with the first guy that comes along and ending up barefoot and pregnant right out of high school. I want more for you than that."

"Mom ... you know how much I care for Edward and how much he cares for me. I love him but we've never given our relationship a chance. I don't know what will happen but I'm not planning on jumping into bed with him the first chance I get, okay? I don't want to be barefoot and pregnant right out of high school - I want more for myself than that - and I want more for Edward."

"Please promise me you'll be careful, Bella."

"Mom ..." I whined. "I promise to be careful when the time comes, okay?"

We were up early the next morning and on our way to Sedona before nine. Phil was wide awake and humming along to the radio as he drove. I quietly reflected on the conversation with my Mom from the night before, and I couldn't help but think there was a reason why she was so against me having a relationship with Edward. It had been a bone of contention between us before and now it had reared its ugly head again, but I couldn't put my finger on why.

"Here's some calling cards so you can call us when you get a chance - and don't use up all the minutes calling Edward, okay?" Mom asked as Phil put my bags inside my room.

I sighed.

"He's at baseball camp anyway," I lied.

I knew full well that Edward wouldn't be leaving for camp for another week but my Mom didn't know that. Even if Edward had already gone to camp, I still would have used the minutes to talk to Esme. In fact, I decided that when I called Edward, I'd ask to talk to Esme for a few minutes. Like Edward's, I valued Esme's quiet assurance. She was the sane Mom while my Mom was the crazy one.

I said goodbye to Mom and Phil, and they promised they'd see me on Friday evening for the chamber performance. They'd spend the night in Sedona and come back on Saturday afternoon for the Finale Concert.

"If you need anything, don't hesitate to call, okay, Bella?" Phil asked.

"Okay. Thanks, Phil."

He smiled and climbed into his truck where Mom was already waiting.

I turned and walked back to my room. I had about forty-five minutes before I was supposed to meet everyone in the auditorium. We were supposed to meet quickly and then branch off to whatever workshops we'd signed up for. I decided to go back to my room and write a letter to Edward. I'd save his phone call for later.

My roommate was unpacking when I got back to my room. Her name was Terra, and she was a junior from a high school in Scottsdale. She seemed nice and after we exchanged pleasantries we chatted for a few minutes and I climbed onto my bed, pulling out my notebook to write a letter to Edward.

"Who's the hottie?" Terra asked as she glanced at the picture of Edward and me that sat on the table next to my bed.

"That's Edward."

"Brother? Boyfriend?"

"He's … he's my … everything." I whispered.

"So he's your boyfriend." Terra giggled.

I sighed.

"Not exactly."

"What do you mean 'not exactly'? Either he is or he isn't."

"He's my best friend, and we'd like nothing more than to be involved with each other that way but we don't live close to each other, so until we do …."

"You're just friends."

"Yeah. Best friends."

"That's kind of sweet."

I took the last few minutes I had before we had to be at orientation to quickly write Edward. I planned on taking my notebook with me in case I got bored and had time to write more later.

I met Heidi outside my room and we walked to orientation together. After a brief welcome and staff introductions, we were sent off to our first workshops of the week.

Intermediate piano was my first workshop. Mr. Brandt, our instructor, passed out some worksheets and asked us to take a seat at a keyboard as we walked in. I was a little worried about taking intermediate piano, but I talked to Sam about it before I requested the class and she assured me that I was more intermediate than beginner.

"Do you take lessons at home?" Mr. Brandt asked.

"Yeah," I replied, shyly.

"You're very good and I think your skill level is beyond this class."

All of that after twenty minutes of class? I talked to Mr. Brandt for a few more minutes, and he promised that he'd see what he could do to move me into the advanced piano class.

My second workshop was Sight singing and Ear training. I thought it would be a boring class, but as I sat and listened to the instructor – what she was talking about made sense. We went over scales – major and minor. By the end of the hour, I felt like my brain was on overload and my hand hurt from writing so many notes.

After the second workshop we had forty-five minutes for lunch. After lunch we had an hour and a half rehearsal for chamber choir followed by an hour long afternoon workshop. A two hour long choir rehearsal rounded out our day before we wrapped up for dinner. Each day of the camp was the same – the only difference was our evenings. After dinner there were organized activities we could participate in or we were allowed to use the pool and hot tub. We were also allowed to walk the campus but had to check in at nine p.m. for curfew.

The first evening, after dinner, I called Edward from the pay phone in the laundry room of the pool house. I hopped up on the counter and dialed according to the directions on the back of my calling card. Esme answered and I spent the first few minutes chatting with her. After the uneasy discussion I'd had with my own Mom, it was nice to talk to Esme. She made me promise I'd call again if I needed to talk some more and she handed the phone off to a very anxious Edward.

"Hey, Boo," he sighed.

"Hey, you."

"How's music camp so far?"

"Intense, but good."

"Intense? How?"

"Everything is accelerated because we only have a couple hours rehearsal every day and we're having a concert on Saturday. But it's more than just being in a classroom and singing. I'm taking ear training and sight singing, I'm even taking music theory. It's interesting. I feel like I've already learned a lot and it's only the first day."

Edward and I chatted for nearly twenty minutes before I realized how long I'd been on the phone. I apologized for having to cut our conversation short, but I promised to call him at the end of the week even if it was only for a quick hello. I wanted to hear his voice before he went off to baseball camp.

My week at music camp was so busy I didn't have the time to miss my parents or Edward. That didn't mean that I didn't think about them often. Taking music classes made me think of Edward constantly – wondering if it was something he knew or something that he would find interesting.

Before I knew it, Friday evening was upon us, and I found myself in my room getting ready for our Chamber music concert. Chamber meant that everything was concentrated into ensembles. Instead of an entire orchestra – there were smaller groups that performed individually - violins, cellos, flutes, clarinets, a string quartet, and a brass ensemble. The Choir was divided into a Men's ensemble and a Women's ensemble.

The women's ensemble only performed four short songs. I recognized and knew one of the songs from the All State Women's Choir. "The Lonesome Road" hadn't been one of my favorites that we sang, but it quickly became my favorite once the Choir Director, Dr. Miller asked me to try out to sing the solo. I was nervous about trying out as I stood in his office in front of three of the department's music professors, but Dr. Miller asked me to relax and sing from my heart.

I was elated to find out that I'd gotten the solo part.

I didn't bother to tell Mom about my solo. I wanted to save it for a surprise. While there was a program passed out for all the parents and family who attended the performance – my solo wasn't listed.

"Baby … I'm so proud of you. That was incredible!" Mom gushed.

Phil nodded with a huge grin on his face.

"I'm so buying the video tape and a recording of that," Mom smiled.

"Better order two of each … I know Dad will want to see and hear it."

The next day was our last day of camp and our Concert Finale was at two p.m. We had a brief rehearsal after breakfast, and then we were asked to clean up our rooms and have our parents pick up our things so we could have a quick departure after the concert.

It wasn't a long concert, but it was nice, and the amount of talent was amazing. The choir had only practiced for two hours a day for the past five days, but we sounded like we'd been singing together for years and it was an honor to be a part of such a talented group of singers.

To say that I walked away from that summer camp with a new appreciation for music was a gross understatement. Not only did I appreciate it more, but I fell completely in love with it. As I handed my room key over to one of the staff members, the director pulled me aside and asked me if I'd like to come back the following year.

"I'll think about it. Thank you so much for the offer."

I did want to think about it. It was already scheduled for June the following year. I'd be able to attend the music camp and still keep my promise to Edward. After telling him in a letter how much I'd enjoyed it, I was sure he'd understand me getting to Forks a little later than planned. The good thing was that camp was a week earlier and if I played my cards right – I could still make it to Forks in time for Edward's sixteenth birthday.

As I sat in Phil's truck on the drive back to Phoenix, I began to dread the fact that I had to pack up my room to move. Thankfully, Phil had hired movers again to move everything, but I still had to pack up all my books and clothes. We were going to have a huge yard sale after we moved – Mom and I wouldn't need all our old furniture. Phil's house was fully furnished – very tastefully for a bachelor I might add. But when we agreed to move in with him, he promised me that we could redecorate the bedroom that would eventually become mine –any way I wanted.

I left the next Sunday for volleyball camp. It was being held in Scottsdale, so it wasn't that far away. I'd be gone for two weeks, but I was looking forward to it. I knew that homesickness would probably kick in at some point. I couldn't talk to Edward because he was still at baseball camp. It was a different type of hurt knowing that I couldn't talk to him because of where we were as opposed to the hurt when he didn't want to talk to me.

I focused on what I came to camp to do. My days were filled with drills, running plays and practicing setting, spiking and serving. I pushed myself to the limit everyday – from the time I got up in the morning until I fell into bed at night. It honestly felt good to push myself. Every muscle in my body was aching at the end of the two weeks, but it hurt so good.

The week between volleyball camps, Mom and I moved out of our apartment and into Phil's house. My new bedroom was freshly painted, newly decorated, and waiting for me. The movers emptied all our old furniture into Phil's' garage, while most of the boxes went inside. It took me a couple days to organize my room the way I wanted, but when I was done, I took my note book and went out to lounge by the pool.

Edward must have known I was thinking of him. No sooner than I had begun to write his letter than Phil was telling me that Edward was on the phone.

"Hey, Boo."

"Hey … I was just thinking about you. I was working on your letter for today."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. So how was baseball camp?"

"It was good. I learned a lot. They had me change positions – instead of playing shortstop they worked with me on pitching. They told me I had good form and a strong arm."

"That's great, Edward, but how do you feel about that? You loved playing shortstop."

"I like it. A lot. More than I thought I would."

"Good. So now you've got a new challenge huh?"

"Yup. How was volleyball camp?"

"Good." I replied.

I didn't want to tell him how hard I'd pushed myself everyday – he'd only scold me.

"I think between that camp and working out with the ASU team next week, we'll be in really good shape for the season."

"Thirsty for another MVP trophy, Boo?" he chuckled.

"No. That took me completely by surprise. I'm honored that my coaches thought so highly of me."

"Bella … you are really good. You just had to figure out what you were good at. This past year – you've really come into your own with dance, volleyball and music. You've grown so much but you're still the same sensitive, caring and sweet person you've always been, but Bella, never ever discount how good you are on the volleyball court."

"I don't want to be cocky about it. My teammates work just as hard as I do."

"I don't doubt that they do. But Bella, I don't think you have it in you to be like that. It's not who you are."

I sighed.

"I'm glad you called, Edward. I didn't know how badly I needed to hear your voice until I talked to you."

"I miss you, Bella."

"I miss you too, Edward. So fucking much."

Edward chuckled at my expletive.

"Eleven more months, Boo. Then I promise to make it worth both of our wait."

"That reminds me, Edward. There is something I need to tell you."

"As long as you don't tell me you've changed your mind."

Edward's voice was nearly a whisper and my heart stammered in my chest threatening to break. If I could have pulled him into my arms to hold him and tell him my news I would have; if only so I didn't have to hear the mixture of fear and disappointment in his voice. The fissures in my heart cracked open a little wider at the thought of the hurt expression on his handsome face.

"No … no, Edward. I've given you my word and … well … I know I've broken promises I've made to you before but I won't do it again. Your trust – your peace of mind and your faith in me matter too much. That said, what I need to tell you does affect when I move back to Forks."

I could hear Edward's breathing change on the other end of the line.

"Edward … relax, please? Don't panic, okay? I've been invited back to the music camp next year and I'd really like to go again. As far as I know there isn't anything like that in Washington. The final concert is on the eighteenth of June so I can fly up to Seattle on the nineteenth and be there in time for your birthday."

Edward exhaled sharply.

"You really thought I was going to say I'd changed my mind about moving didn't you?" I asked sadly.

"Yeah, a little."

I sighed.

"I'm sorry, Boo. I trust you … I do. I'm just …." He hesitated and I said the word for him.

"Scared?"

"Yeah."

I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes and I knew if I couldn't keep my voice steady it would reveal my emotions. Edward was honest with me and although it hurt – I deserved it because I'd hurt him.

"It's okay, Edward." I sniffled. "I deserve it, but I don't want you to ever be afraid of me."

"You're the only person who could ever truly hurt me, Bella."

Just when I thought my heart couldn't hurt any more …

A/N: Thoughts?

See you next week!