Chapter nine – Sorry

Kanda was first to wake in the morning. This in itself was not usual at all. In fact, it was almost normal.

"Moyashi?" Kanda groaned groggily as he sat up, brushing a strand of loose hair from his face. He received no answer. Frowning, he called louder, "Beansprout?" Silence prevailed.

Kanda threw his blankets off and climbed out of bed to stalk over to the bean sprout's bedside. Allen was a light sleeper – when he was sleeping at all. The slightest noise woke him and he never slept peacefully.

Looking down at his roommate it was apparent that Allen was in a state commonly referred to as dead to the world. Even in such a deep sleep it was obvious it wasn't pleasant dreams he was dreaming.

His face was pale and slick with sweat, his breath coming in very shallow inhalations.

Kanda hesitated, not sure what to do. The Moyashi needed to be woken and it needed to be done gently, delicately. He looked like he might break at the slightest touch. So vulnerable. Kanda had to be careful.
Whack. "Wake the fuck up before I tear your hair from its roots."

A low moan came from Allen's lips as he blinked into awareness.

"Kanda?" Came the sleepy question.

"Who the fuck else would be in our room trying to drag you out of bed out of the kindness in his heart just so you aren't late?"

"Yeah. Kanda alright."

Kanda snorted and stood up, watching as Allen blinked blearily upwards for a moment before frowning.

Allen didn't look well. He hadn't since last night. His skin seemed paler than usual and there were faint, dark smudges under his eyes that made it look like he hadn't slept well. Not that really surprised Kanda, but the point remained.

"You don't look so good."
"No thanks to your kind awakening." Allen grumbled back as he hoisted himself out of bed and crossed the room to gather his clothes to get dressed.

Kanda watched as Allen vanished into the bathroom, scowling he returned to getting himself organized for the up and coming day.

His books vanished into his black canvas bag and his black and white ensemble that made up what he deemed to be pajamas were replaced with his school uniform. The Moyashi still not having left the bathroom Kanda frowned and adjusted his pony tail without the aid of a mirror.

Five minutes later Allen was yet to emerge and Kanda was growing impatient. A quick glance at his watched showed that they had only fifteen minutes to eat breakfast and get to class.

Should just ditch his sorry ass… But for some reason Kanda felt himself unable to do that. Growling under his breath his shifted impatiently from foot to foot before chancing another glance down at his watch.

Fuck it.

"Moyashi, I swear to dear god you better be dead or dieing in there or I will tear you limb from limb!" Kanda roared, banging loudly on the bathroom door.

There came a muffled curse followed me the alarming sound of glass breaking from within and Kanda flinched back.

"… Moyashi?" He repeated, worriedly now.

"I'm fine. Go ahead without me."

"Are you fucking joking? If you don't leave now you'll never make it to class on time!"

Kanda received no reply. Hesitantly, he knocked on the door again. "Moyashi, are you okay in there?"

"I said I'm fine! Just go already!"

Any trace of worry slipped off of Kanda's face as he scowled angrily at the door. "Have it your way." He shot back nastily and stormed out of the dorm room, allowing the door to slam shut loudly behind him.

Fucking Moyashi! I don't even have time for breakfast now! Kanda stomped through down the stairs, throwing glares at any passing students who flinched back in alarm. Even his fangirls found it best to keep a gap of a few meters.

oOo_O_oOo

It was near the end of the first session that Allen finally showed up.

Lavi raised an eyebrow and nudged at the stiff and brooding teen sitting beside him.

"What?" Came the agitated whispered reply and Lavi nodded in Allen's direction.

When Kanda had shown up to class bear seconds before the bell rang alone, Lavi and Lenalee had asked where his roommate was and had received a disgruntled but predictable "Who cares?"

It had been apparent though that the Japanese male was not happy. His dangerous mood had simmered down to a dull sulk as the lesson progressed and Lavi was not privy to what had caused such a mood but he would bet his eye patch on the cause being their new friend.

Lavi frowned as he realized for the first time that Allen looked like hell frozen over. He muttered an apology to Reever and crossed the room with his head bent down to slide into the empty seat beside Lenalee and immediately buried his head in his arms.
"Allen, are you alright?" Lenalee whispered, bending down in an attempt peer through his folded arms.

"Fine." Was the barely audible reply.

"Are you sure?" Lavi asked, leaning around Lenalee to better look at him.

Allen raised his head from his hands. "I'm fine. I promise."
Lavi frowned and he saw Kanda roll his eyes beside him. Allen looked anything but fine. Black rimmed eyes peered out from a pale and drawn face and his brow was creased in what could have been worry or pain.

Lavi wanted to protest but Allen's firm tone had made it clear he wasn't answering any questions so instead he replied with a half hearted "If you say so."

The second Allen's head returned to his arms Lavi spun around to stare pointedly at Kanda.

"What?" Kanda asked, affronted.

"Do you know what's wrong with him?"

"How the fuck should I know?"

"Well, you are his roommate." Lenalee pointed out, casting a worried look at Allen to see if he was keyed into their conversation. Apparently he wasn't. Nothing short of an explosion would shake him from his self induced coma.

"I don't know anything about it. He's been out of it since last night." Kanda grumbled, returning his eyes to his book in an attempt to appear as if he were taking notes. Lenalee and Lavi were not fooled by his diversionary tactics.

"Yu-chan." Lavi whined, tugging at his sleeve. Kanda cursed and tore himself free from Lavi's grip, glowering at the red head.

"Are you sure you don't know?"

"No! Stop asking me!" Kanda snapped. "I don't know what the Moyashi's problem is and I don't care!"

"You look like you care." Lavi pointed out. Kanda had obviously had enough. He pushed his slammed his books shut, slung his book bag angrily over his shoulder. Luckily for him a split second after he stood the bell rang, sparing him detention as he strode from the room only slightly ahead of the milling crowds.

Lavi sighed and rolled his eyes, leaning around Lenalee to poke at Allen.

"Oi, Moyashi-chan. Class's over."

Slowly Allen raised his head, staring blearily at Lavi as the message struggled to register.

"Oh. Right."

"Maybe you should go to the nurse's office?" Lenalee suggested. Allen shook his head.

"I'm fine. Just a bit tired." He yawned as if to emphasize his point.

Lenalee bit her lip as she got to her feet and waited by the door for them.

Lavi watched as Allen slowly stood, tucking his chair in and hefting his bag over a shoulder he started towards the door. Lavi debated stopping him but in the end allowed him to pass.

Kanda was nowhere in sight and Lenalee bid them farewell so she could run some quick errands for her brother during the short break. So, on a hunch that Allen wasn't up to a long walk, Lavi headed to a wooden bench and table in the courtyards and watched as Allen wearily slid in across from him.

It was silent for a moment as Allen gently rested his head on his arms again – staring off into the distance.

"… Sooo… Do I get to know what's wrong now?"

"I told you. Nothings –."

"You don't honestly think I'm that dumb do you, Moyashi?" Lavi snorted. Allen glared sullenly up at him.

"I never said that."

"You were implying it."

"How so?"

"By seriously expecting me to believe you're alright."

Allen lapsed into silence. "I just haven't been sleeping well lately. It's adding up a bit." He admitted.

Lavi frowned. "Ah. Why didn't you just say so?"

"… Sorry."

"Jesus. You even went and put Yu-chan in a bad mood over this?" Lavi covered his eyes with his hand and shook his head in mock exasperation.

"Sorry." Allen repeated somewhat sheepishly.

"Well, why don't we get some caffeine into you? Help you get through the rest of the day."

Before Allen could open his mouth to object Lavi had slid out of his seat and was bouncing across the courtyard back towards the buildings. Allen watched him go; seriously doubting a little caffeine would help him in the slightest.

A moment later Lavi returned, tossing a chocolate bar from hand to hand.

"Chocolate at this time of the morning?" Allen asked skeptically. It landed with a solid thunk in the table in front of Allen.

"It'll give you a little energy boost." Lavi crooned.

Sighing, Allen tugged the bar towards him and unwrapped it.

oOo_oOo_oOo

The rest of the day had been tiring. By the time the last lesson had finally ended Allen could have cheered with joy. The day had not been made any easier by the fact his last session had him alone with Kanda.

Judging by the silent treatment he had received, his roommate was still pissed at him for the morning.

Allen trailed after Kanda in the direction of the dorms, keeping his eyes on the ground. He half wished Lenalee or Lavi would show up just to save him from the awkward silence.
By the time they had reached the room Allen was seriously expecting Kanda to lock him out. Surprisingly though the door was left open for him to follow in.

There was a loud thunk as Kanda tossed his bag onto the floor by his desk and began pulling out books to do his homework with.

Allen bit his lip and slid into his own desk. He was too tired for homework. No use even trying. He would never be able to focus. All he really wanted to do was sleep. But seeing as how much luck he had been having with the lately it seemed like a bad idea.

So instead he settled for leaning his head on his arms and watching Kanda sort through his books – muttering darkly under his breath as he did so.

Maybe I should apologize… Allen winced as Kanda slammed the drawer he had just opened shut.

He can sure hold a grudge though…

The sound of rustling from his own drawer attracted his attention and he sat up, curiously sliding it open.

Bang!

Allen nearly fell out of his chair as something rocketed out of his drawer and slammed into his face, had something not latched onto his sleeve and gave a tug he would have.

He looked down and blinked in surprise as he saw the 'something' was Timcanpy.

"Where've you been Tim?" Allen gently scolded.

The golem gave his sleeve one last tug before flying off to settle on his head.

A 'che' came Kanda's general direction and Allen sent a glare at him as he closed the drawer and relaxed back onto his desk.

"Maybe you should whack him in the face too, hey Tim?" Allen whispered to his golden golem which seemed to currently be preoccupied eating his hair.
The light tug at his scalp suggested Tim agreed. Allen rested his head back on his arms and watched as Kanda started on him homework.

Maybe I will apologize…

oOo_oOo_oOo

The keys were covered in blood. Allen didn't know whose blood or why it was there but he knew for sure it was blood.

Carefully, he trailed his finger along the keys, producing a distorted chime from the piano. His finger cut a clean, white trail through the red, dying the tip of his gloved finger a discolored scarlet.

Slowly he brang his finger up to eye level and watched as the stain bloomed, spreading out across the starched fabric.

He could feel the wetness seeping in through the material to touch his skin and he shivered as a light breeze made the wetness ache with pain.

He turned, looking for the source of the breeze but the room was air tight, mirrors looking back at him wherever he turned.

"Allen…"

His head whipped around in the direction of the voice.

He was looking into a mirror directly opposite him. At first all he could see was his own scared face looking back at him, the piano in the behind him shimmering like it wasn't there.

Then slowly his eleven year self was joined by a dark shape behind him.

"W-who's there?"

"Allen …"

The whispered words sent a shiver down his spine and he stared at the two bright lights hovering in the head of the darkened silhouette.

A quick glance behind him saw nothing but the piano and he slowly turned to look back at the mirror again.

Slowly, a gash appeared where the mouth ought to be. As Allen watched it twisted into an indistinct smirk.

"Allen…"

"Guh!"

Allen jerked awake with a smothered gasp, slamming his chair backwards as he struggled for breath.

His heart was pounding loudly in his chest and Allen raised a shaky hand to grab a fistful of his shirt as he stared forward.

A dream … Just a dream…

He lifted his hand from his shirt to brush his hair backwards. Tim was nowhere to be seen.

"Moyashi?"

Kanda's head poked out of the bathroom, his loose hair swinging free around his shoulders.

Allen tried to steady his racing heart and calm his heaving breaths. He would never live it down if he babbled like a baby in front of Kanda.

He tried to struggle up right when he realized for the first time something was draped around his shoulders. Hesitantly he reached backwards and tugged at it.

A blanket fell into a heap in his lap and he stared uncomprehendingly for a moment before looking back up at Kanda's impassive face.

"Did – you?"
"Che." Kanda scowled at him and ducked back into the bathroom leaving Allen staring bewilderedly after him.

A moment later Kanda emerged from the bathroom, flicking the light off behind him. A quick glance out the window showed Allen that during his nightmare the sky had become pitch black.

"How long was I out for?"

"A couple of hours." Kanda frowned.

"Oh…" Allen pushing his hair back from his face and stared down at his lap. His heart rate was finally slowing down but rather than feeling refreshed from his long nap he felt sore and even more weary then before.

"Are you going to get up or just sit there looking brain dead?"

Allen looked up at Kanda leaning against the wall beside him. He hadn't realized he was still there. Kanda didn't look pissed anymore; rather he looked like he was… Okay, Allen honestly couldn't pin down the look on his face and he wasn't about to ask, so instead he settled for a fairly safe topic change.

"Why's your hair out?"

"My hair tie broke." Came the irritated reply and Kanda batted his hair back behind him with a pale hand.

"Don't you have anymore?"

There was a muted reply that had something like Baka Usagi and stole in there as Kanda pushed himself off the wall.

"I'm going to bed now." He announced and strode quickly across the room.

Heaving a sigh Allen stood off and gathered his clothes from the wardrobe before vanishing into the bathroom.

He reached for the lock but as he did so his vision flickered and he realized his glove was soaked in red.

"Gah!" He flinched backwards and stared down at his hand. His glove was completely normal. He looked up at the lock and he could almost feel it look back innocently at him.

Muttering softly Allen chose to leave it unlocked and slinked into the centre of the bathroom to begin changing. As he did so he became aware of something moving in the corner of his eye.

His head flicked up he was greeted with the sight of himself in the mirror; Shirt held loosely in his hands, red arm twitching slightly – out of coldness. Not fear. Because he was cold. That was all.

He looked back down at his clothes and then back up at the mirror.

For Christ sakes it's just a mirror… I don't need to be afraid!

None the less Allen finished dressing in record time and nearly threw the door open in his hurry to escape the suddenly claustrophobic bathroom.

The room was dark and he could vaguely make out the indistinct shapes of the room furniture.

He headed towards his bed but paused half way there when Kanda called out to him.

"Oi, Moyashi? What do you think you're doing?"

"Huh? Going to bed?"

There was a dismissive snort which for some reason tweaked Allen's annoyance.

"You're not going to having another fucking seizure in your sleep again are you?"

"What are you…" Allen trailed off and looked down at the floor.

"Probably…"

The room was silent for a moment and Allen thought that Kanda might not reply for a second.
"Are they that bad? The dreams?"

The question caught Allen off guard. He wanted to shrug it off as over reacting but instead he replied with, "Yes. They're horrible."

Silence.

"Come here."

Allen didn't need to be told twice. He turned around and headed back to Kanda's bed. The covers were held open and he once again climbed in beside his most irritating, irrational, anti social friend.

He could feel the shifting in the blankets as Kanda moved over to make more room for him. Neither one talked and after a couple of minutes Allen relaxed back into the pillow and allowed his eyes to drift closed.

He felt a numbness as he walked the fine line between being awake enough to feel Kanda's soft breaths on the back of his neck and being asleep enough that they felt like ghostly fingers trailing down his collar.

It was strange in this dream like awareness and Allen allowed sleep to gradually carry him further along.

"Allen…"

Instantly his eyes snapped open as the dreaminess was lost to him. He took in a sharp breath as his heart tried to make up for the skipped beat. Suddenly, the comfort of the covers seemed stifling and Allen wanted to be up and about, minimizing his chances of falling to sleep.

Just when Allen was seriously considering getting out of bed a cool hand pressed against his exposed shoulder.

"It's not real."

Allen let out his pent up breath. He wasn't sure what had put Kanda in this strange and oddly understanding mood but he would take it any day. The cool hand on his shoulder withdrew and Allen felt himself feeling sorry for its loss. He wasn't sure he could safely go back to sleep without.

Kanda seemed to sense his tenseness because he let out a soft sigh and a warm arm wrapped around Allen's shoulders, pulling him in closer.

"Now, shut the fuck up and go to sleep or I'll strangle you." The arm around him tightened threateningly and Allen had to smile.

It was odd, being like this and as Allen felt himself getting drowsy again he realized this was the perfect chance to apologize.

"Sorry."

"For what?"

What am I sorry for again? Allen searched his sleep deprived mind for an answer.

"For… This morning."

"Che. I'm over it. Now shut up and go to sleep."

Allen allowed his eyes to drift closed and decided he would to just that.

A/N: And the voting's closed! It appears that most of you want LaviLena as the side pairing! Sorry to those who wanted Lucky. I myself was fine with either one. Have never written for either pairing though… Only pairing I've written for in DGM is Yullen…

I just got back from my first anime convention yesterday and am now richer 8 volumes of DGM manga, an Allen plushie and a DGM wallscroll… And 14 other volumes of manga and three Naruto plushies…

Sorry. Just had to tell you guys

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Next update will hopefully be soon! Reviewing would be nice ~