Chapter twenty two – Hypothetical
Kanda leaned back in his chair, glaring at the world around him with angry and vaguely suspicious eyes. He tossed a look over at the doors through which Anita and the goddamn beansprout had disappeared only five minutes ago before he glanced back down at the menu before him, trying to look like he wasn't bothered.
Because, he wasn't. Really, not at all. It wasn't his problem who the Moyashi ran off with. He could run off with Jack the bloody Ripper and it still wouldn't be his problem. Kanda shifted in his seat before once again glancing over at the door.
"You seem troubled Yu-chan," Lavi observed dryly. Kanda threw him a dirty look. "Oh come now Yu-chan," Lavi said, "don't be such a killjoy."
"I'm not," Kanda insisted before returning his gaze to the door again, seemingly reluctant to let it out of his sight. Lavi watched this with a raised eye. "If you're so worried about leaving them alone, go check on them."
"I'm not worried. What made you think I was worried? Mind your own fucking business. If you're worried you go check."
"That's a nice case of paranoia you're developing there, Yu-chan."
"I'm not paranoid," Kanda snapped without removing his eyes from the place where they were glued, which wasn't helping his 'I'm not paranoid' case at all.
Lenalee and Lavi exchanged looks.
"Say… Yu-chan…"
"Don't call me that!"
"As cute as it is watching you and Allen dance around each other like this, perhaps it's time you man up and confess already," Lavi suggested holding up his menu quickly in case Kanda decided to throw something at him for his kind suggestion. Lucky for Lavi though, there was nothing dangerous or throw-worthy within Kanda's reach.
So, Kanda settled for his death glare. "I'm sure you think you're being funny," he hissed, "but you're not so kindly shut the fuck up."
Lavi gave an exasperated sigh and set his menu back down. "Okay, let's talk hypothetical here."
"Let's not," Kanda snapped.
"It's just hypothetical," Lenalee said softly, looking Kanda right on in the eyes.
"The answers still no," he insisted stubbornly before sourly returning his eyes to the menu even though everyone present knew that it held no real interest to him. The only meal Kanda had and ever would eat was Soba.
"The conversation won't leave this table," Lenalee swore, "and we all know that it is purely hypothetical."
And air of unrest fell around the trio. Lenalee and Lavi determined to get Kanda to play along with the conversation and Kanda equally determined not to.
It was clear they'd reached a stalemate so Lenalee glanced over at Lavi before looking back at Kanda, eyes heavy lidded as she bit her lip, playing the part of a full upset teenage girl. Kanda narrowed his eyes as Lenalee's lower lip trembled.
"Please?" She asked in a soft voice, sounding as though she was on the verge of tears. She knew - sneakily – that all of her male comrades were rather susceptible to this tactic. She was equally sure that deep down they knew that they were crocodile tears but it's awfully hard for a male to think rationally when tears are cascading down a female's cheeks.
Or perhaps they were just awfully terrified what would happen to them if Komui found out that they'd made his precious sister cry.
Finally, Kanda gave a grudging nod. "Hypothetical," he muttered.
Lavi let loose a victorious little smirk but managed to smother it before Kanda caught sight of it and strangled him and thus, ending this hypothetical scenario. Sobering up he asked, "Hypothetically, if you were to like Allen, not that you do, but if you did, why is it that you're so reluctant to confess? Hypothetically."
Kanda eyed him coolly – having successfully removed his eyes from the door – and fiddled with a knife he'd recently found beneath his napkin. "First off, even in a hypothetical situation I would never like that runt of a beansprout."
"But just pretend," Lenalee insisted, "It's all hypothetical."
Kanda glared at the both of them with vicious eyes. "Fine. Hypothetically, If I were to… And I didn't want to…" Kanda seemed to be having trouble saying the words like and confess. Clearing his throat awkwardly he said, "It might be because…" he trailed off abruptly.
"Because...?" Lavi prompted.
"I can't do this." Kanda said brusquely, surprising both Lenalee and Lavi immensely.
"What – why?" Lenalee asked, startled by Kanda's suddenly aggravated expression.
Kanda himself shifted awkwardly in his seat and snapped, "It's fucking stupid, alright? I'm not going to have a hypothetical conversation about something like that. Okay?"
Lavi and Lenalee stared blankly at him for a minute. Was Kanda… embarrassed? Somehow Lenalee found that awfully adorable and had to stifle a giggle that was vying for freedom.
"Is it because you don't know why you won't confess?" Lavi said swiftly.
"Yes that's – what? FUCK NO!"
Lavi gave a huge smirk at Kanda's confused and flustered face. It wasn't often one could elicit such a reaction from the usual icy samurai, and Allen was one of the few topics that could do so.
"So you do admit that you like Allen then?" He said calmly, slyly almost.
"What – I never – We were talking hypothetically!"
"You said you didn't want to have a hypothetical conversation," Lavi hummed and – like a ninja – extracted the knife and fork from Yu-chan's reach before he recalled their existence and ended Lavi's own.
"It's not a fucking legit answer when you trick it out of someone you two faced conniving sonova –."
"Woah, woah!" Lenalee called, blushing and waving her hands to quieten down the swearing teenager who was cussing like a sailor. "Don't forget, Kanda we're in public! People are staring!"
Reluctantly Kanda eased himself back down in his seat, still fuming as he glared violently at the redhead across from him.
"Just because I caught you in a moment of surprise," Lavi said with surprising calm, "does not mean I tricked the answer out of you. It was a legit move and it gave me a legit answer."
"It's not," Kanda insisted.
Lavi, however, was no longer smirking, but looking unusually serious. "I'm not screwing around here Kanda, I'm serious. Do you like Allen?"
There was a sharp thwack as a knife Lavi had forgotten to retrieve impaled itself in the soft wood of the table, ruining the lovely tablecloth Anita had spread across it.
"I'm going to the bathroom," Kanda snapped as he pushed himself out of his seat, storming off in the general direction of the restrooms before Lenalee or Lavi could stop him. He slammed into a balding middle aged man as he did so and gave him a vindictive push.
His friends watched silently as he disappeared around the corner.
"I think you put him in a bad mood," Lenalee observed as she tried to wiggle the knife free from the table.
Lavi snorted. "He's always in a bad mood. This one was just slightly more productive."
oOo_oOo_oOo
The jug tumbled from Allen's hands and proceeded to smash on the floor, spilling the remains of the soft drink at their feet. Anita let out a soft yelp and took a step back but Allen, however, was too busy staring at Anita in amazement.
"What?" Allen asked, hands posed as if he was still cradling the shimmering glass. Half out of it, it took him a moment to realize that he'd just dropped the jug, smashing the lovely crystal all over the floor and dousing the linoleum in the fresh scent of lemon.
"Ah! Sorry! Allen flushed and dropped to the ground as he began scooping up sharp shards of glass, the tips of his gloves going damp with excess liquid.
There was the rustle of expensive fabrics and Anita dropped down to assist him, her slender fingers picking up the mess with the expertise of long years working in restaurants. It was silent for a moment and Allen was beginning to think he'd perhaps misheard her before when Anita finally spoke up again.
"Are you alright?"
"Erm, yeah. Sorry about your jug."
Anita gave him a kind smile. "That's alright," she said, "no harm done."
Allen allowed her to gently nudge his hands out of the way and pick up the rest of the glass in one deft movement. He offered to wipe up the lemon squash on the floor but Anita answered him breezily.
"Don't be silly," She chuckled, "That's what we have cleaners for."
She did, however, allow Allen to take the glass from her hands and take it over to the bin. She watched as he stripped his gloves off his hands – his back turned to her, of course – and rinsed his sticky hands beneath the cool water of the tap.
"Perhaps," Anita said softly, "I could have asked that more tactfully."
Allen offered her a weak smile of her shoulder. "Perhaps," he agreed.
Anita straightened up, instantly become that little bit more serious as Allen dried his hands and re-donned his gloves, glancing over at her in a way that confirmed he was now ready to proceed.
"Do you know where my Master is?"
Anita tilted her head to the side as she considered this question. "Yes," she said slowly, "and no."
"What do you mean by that?" Allen pressed.
"I have heard some … whispers, that he's recently been frequenting the brothel down town," – Allen flushed at this. So very much like his Master – "and he did make mention of the name when he came to visit me last night."
"Visit you?" Allen echoed uncertainly.
Anita supplied him with a truly heart-warming smile. "I consider myself very close to Marian, Allen, although I am often unsure if he feels the same," she shook her head before continuing, "How it is we are acquainted is beside the point, however."
Allen waited patiently for her to continue.
"I've known, of course, your relationship with him for quite a while. I've known Marian since I was a young girl. Oh, how he bemoaned his unfortunate fate when he took you on as his apprentice."
Allen allowed himself a grim smile at this but Anita seemed to find it amusing.
"Regardless, there has been talk drifting around recently that you are perhaps seeking out your elusive guardian, and here I was thinking to myself that maybe you would like my assistance."
"Thank you," Allen said gratefully, "I'd love your help. It'd be fantastic. I've been looking for him all week but the bastard didn't want to be found," Allen wrinkled his nose bitterly and shivered at the prospect of facing Cross again.
Ever helpful, Anita scribbled down the address for the brothel in town (Allen waved off her concern about one so young going in. "I've been in worse.") and would only smile mysteriously when Allen queried about her connections.
"Thank you," Allen said again fervently as he clenched the now scrunched up paper in his fist, "Really, thank you a lot."
Anita once again gave him one of her special smiles. "That's alright Allen. Also, as to why you're looking for him so desperately, I do not need to know. Now, how about we return to your friends? Surely they must be getting hungry by now."
Allen gave a faint laugh. "I'll bet we find Lavi dead. Kanda's likely shanked him by now."
Anita noted with a faint smile the fondness that had seeped into Allen's voice as he spoke of his friends; particularly the way Kanda's name rolled off his tongue with the ease of a word spoken so frequently it has ceased to need thought.
"Kanda's become a lot more of a man since you've arrived," she murmured softly and Allen tilted his head to the side as he looked up at her in puzzled curiosity.
"What do you mean by that?"
A gently chuckle. "He seems a little calmer than before, a little more likable and a little less thoughtless," She glanced down at the small boy before her, "I wonder if you're not the source of these changes?" She pondered aloud.
Allen's face went from inquisitive to a deep burgundy in a mere second as he spluttered wordlessly at Anita, words have difficulty forming, Why was everybody so eager to look into his relationship with the brazen elder man? Was it that much of a curiosity? Allen suddenly has the mental image of Lavi in a top hat and waistcoat sipping tea with Lenalee, the Chinese woman in an eighteenth century dress. "Oh yes," He's mental Lavi was saying, "About that Walker…"
Shaking his head to rid it of the frightening image Allen hurriedly thanked Anita again before rushing out of the kitchen, trying to contain his blush. Anita followed after him, pausing only to put the drinks on a tray.
Still smiling – actually, it was more of a smirk – she watched as the kitchen door swung closed as Allen made his hectic escape.
Oh, deny as he may the bond that was rapidly forming between the two was so clear Anita would bet that Lenalee and the ever mischievous Lavi had been plotting the pairs future for some time now.
It was, for really, there was no better word for it, adorable.
In the time she'd know the trio she'd never seen Kanda open up fully to anyone. Sure, he shared a close relationship with Lenalee and Lavi, but there was never that element of mutual trust between them. Kanda just found it difficult to believe in people. It was sad, but at the same time it was made Kanda Kanda. Or something like that anyone.
Shaking her head Anita pushed her way past the kitchen door and walked ever gracefully after Allen in the direction of the table.
"Oh, welcome back Allen-chan," Lavi said cheerfully as they approached, "why are you so red?"
oOo_oOo_oOo
Kanda returned from his trip to the bathroom to find that the Moyashi was back safely among them. Feeling a mix of relief – no, he would not like to explain that – and annoyance he took his seat across from him again, making it clear that he was ignoring his presence.
" – want with you?" Lavi was saying, tugging lightly at Allen's ear as if this annoying gesture would wow Allen into answering him.
"Nothing much," Allen sighed as he batted Lavi's hand away, "She just wanted help with the drinks like she asked."
Lavi gave an exaggerated snort, making it vividly clear that he did not believe Allen for a second. The sceptic look he threw at him only proved to further his case. And then – because it certainly wasn't clear enough by now – he said with a toss of his red hair, "Yeah. Right."
"It's true," Allen objected, gesturing at the chilled glasses on their table.
"You guys were gone an awfully long time."
"Five minutes," Allen said delicately, "Is not a long time Lavi. In fact, if I didn't know better I'd say it's exactly how long it'd take to pour the drinks, clean up my dropped jug and bring them out again."
"You dropped a jug? Are you okay?" Lenalee asked anxiously, effectively side tracked.
"I'm fine," he reassured her, "I just splashed my gloves a bit,"
Lavi's nose promptly wrinkled at this. "Eww, Allen… And you're still wearing them?"
"I gave them a wash," Allen said somewhat defensively, an awkward tinge to his voice as he subconsciously pulled his hands in closer to himself, as if to protect them from scrutiny. Kanda observed this action carefully.
"So they're wet now? Why not just take them off? Geez…"
Allen shook his head at Lavi's suggestion, licking his lips uncomfortably as he sometimes did when he was nervous. "I'm fine, really. They're fine. They're not wet."
Lavi looked at him in clear disbelief. "Duuude. Gloves plus carbonated beverage equals so not cool."
"Just let it go," Kanda snapped, entering the conversation for the first time since he'd resumed sitting with them, "it's the Moyashi's business if he wants to make himself uncomfortable."
Lavi shot him a suspicious look. "Sticking up for him ey, Kanda?" he stroked his chin as if he were attempting to curl a non-existent goatee around his finger into a perfect little wave. "Protective, eyy? Don't like us picking on him, eyyyyy?"
"Stop that," Kanda snapped automatically, "and fuck you," he added as an afterthought.
Mercifully and further argument was delayed by the arrival of Anita, laden down with plates of food for the trio. While Lavi and Lenalee were occupied arguing over the salt shaker Allen leaned over urgently and whispered in Kanda's ear, "I need to speak with you after."
Kanda decide he'd ignore the sharp thrill that shot down his spine as the younger boy hovered and inch away. However, his mind was quickly jerked away the next words to pass through the boys lips.
"I found Cross."
oOo_oOo_oOo
Let's see if I can get a review from everybody who has alerted this :3
A/N: I know, I know. Useless chapter. Nothing happened. It hasn't been proof read and you hate me. I wanted to make it longer back I'm really too tired and I figured if I don't upload what I've got now It'll take me forever to do it.
Sorry for any errors but I'm too tired to reread it, It'll be betad later.