Greetings Mortals, thank you all so much for you feedback! As a general rule, I want to know what i can improve on. if you ever see anything I can work on, anything at all, please tell me! How can y'alls expect me to get anybetter if I don't even know what I'm doing wring?
To those who requested more Mitchsen interaction, damn you all. The lack of interaction between Beca and Aubrey had been intentional. I'm a realist, and I didn't think that having Aubrey jump right into a relationship, or anything similar to that would have happened. I wanted Aubrey to be semi comfortable in Barden before i started the Mitchsen shit. Fuck oyu all now for ruining the surprise XD lol. You all do have impeccable timing though. Just as soon as I'm about to add something new, you all guess it. Fuck. I need to come up with better plot twists.
Also, how dare you mortals think I'd ever abandon anything! I am nothing but ridiculously stubborn, and if i commit to something, come hell or high water, I'll see it to its motherfucking bitter end. So long as you are with me, I will finish this piece of shit.
Special thanks to Becky Astin-Camp, my aca-fucking-awesome Beta. Guys, Becky acttually has a life, and yet she still puts her time an energy into betaing my fic, so guys, just a massive round of applause to her. Mortals, Becky does a fucking awesome job fixing up my original work, and she also helps with the plot and character development, so if you like this, y'all need to say a big thanks to her.
Finally, I own nothing. It sucks but its true, and I say this so you can't sue.
Aubrey sat in the room, turning over the events of last hour in her mind. To say that the last two hours was eventful would be a very accurate statement. To say that the last two hours was interesting... That would be some what accurate. To say that the last two hours was life changing, that statement's accuracy would remain to be seen.
In the last two hours, Aubrey had her private session with Chloe, and honestly, the things that Chloe told Aubrey were rather troubling. Apparently, her condition was worse then originally thought, and based off of her current mental state, it was highly unlikely that she would be able to leave this hell hole when her evaluation came up. Fucking hell, she didn't even belong here! And now, it was likely that she would have to spend even more time in this God forsaken place.
Shit. Aubrey thought This is going to royally screw up the plan. What would your father-
"Shit." Aubrey swore, when her train of thought brought her here. Thank God Beca wasn't here to hear her.
Fuck, apparently, this line of thinking was her problem. Sitting back down, Aubrey let her head fall down into her in her hands. How the fuck did this happen? She was on the fast track out of here, and now, now it would take a fucking miracle for her to leave when her evaluation cam up. She was almost done, but no. Some fucking to smart for their own good shrink had to look at her file again and over analyze and over think, and now, she was going to end up stuck here, just like Beca.
Fucking Beca. This was all her fault! IF she hadn't said anything to Director Kendrick, if she hadn't opened her big fat mouth, Chloe never would have reopened her file. Anger immediately flared up in Aubrey, and she could feel the grip she heal, her control over herself and her situation slipping.
"God Dammit!" Aubrey roared into the empty room.
She was in control, dammit! She was, and no one else. She was always in control, not her father. She respected her father, she listened to the advice he gave her, and she did her best to gain his (nearly unattainable) approval, but hell if that meant that he controlled her! She was a Posen for fucks sake. Posens only answered to themselves!
On top of this, apparently her older sister Lina was trying to get permission to visit Aubrey here. Fucking hell, her sister was a disgrace to the Posen name. Growing up, Lina always failing some class or another, and persisted in putting more effort into dreams then the plan her father made for her. The last time Aubrey even SPOKE to Lina was when Aubrey attended Lina's graduation and told her to get her priorities straight and get herself a respectable job. To which Lina promptly spat in her face, called her a droid, and said that she'd rather be free, broke, and happy, then rich, caged, and miserable.
That most certainly was a conversation to remember.
"Congratulations Lina." Aubrey sneered, "You've graduated with a 2.07 GPA, managed to fail 6 classes, and nearly flunked out of high school. You've done an excellent job and have quite the resume now."
"Aww, Thank you!" Lina said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "I love you to wittle sissy!"
Aubrey cringed at the nickname. shaking her head, Aubrey couldn't help but to be disgusted by her sister.
"You are a fool!" Aubrey spat. "You're a disgrace to this family, and I'm embarrassed to have to say that you are even related to me. You float around in this little dreamland of yours. You've ignored father's advice, and repeatedly screwed this family over. Finally Father can disown you, and we no longer have to bare the shame that comes with having such disgraceful kin. Lina, you need to get your priorities straight, before you-"
Whatever Aubrey was going to say next was cut off as Lina literally spat in her face. Wiping the liquid off her face, Aubrey glared at the smug expression on her sister's face.
"For serious Lina?" Aubrey growled. "You're so childish and immature, its absolutely ridiculous. I'm younger then you, and yet everyone always thinks that I am the older sister, not you!"
"I prefer the term fun loving, but hey, childish and immature works too!" Lina said cheekily. However, her joking tone soon turned serious. "Bree, I know that you probably don't care for my advice, but please, just try and be a teenager. Enjoy life while you can."
Here, Aubrey scoffed at Lina's words, but this only seemed to make Lina more determined.
"For serious Bree, look at your life right now! You're 14 years old and are already taking AP courses. You've skipped two grades already, and I don't think you even know the meaning of the word fun. You spend all your time studying, and you never live! You never go out and try new things. You just stick to the stupid fucking plan that Dad set up for you, and kill yourself trying to meet is insane demands. Look at Luke Bree! He's your younger brother, and he's already on the same path as you-"
"As he should be." Aubrey said coldly. "You were always the trouble maker, the self proclaimed always did what you wanted, with no thought to what ramifications such actions could bring upon yourself later. My sincerest apologies, but some of us actually care about our futures!"
With that said, Aubrey turned around and stormed away. However, over the noise from the other families in the courtyard, Aubrey heard Lina yell after her.
"Bree just remember its better to be free, broke, and happy, then rich, caged, and miserable."
Laughing a bit at this, Aubrey sat up. Where had Lina's advice gotten her now? Last time Aubrey checked, Lina was struggling to make it big on Broadway and living in an overcrowded apartment. Yeah, Aubrey was quite happy that she didn't take Lina's path. But then again, Lina wasn't here, now was she?
But that wasn't the point. Aubrey followed her father's plan, and for the most part, she was happy. She was! She had a VERY comfortable loft in New York, as well as massive houses in Florida, California, Hawaii, and a beautiful mountain house in Alaska. She had the world at her fingertips. She never wanted anything (other then her father's approval, but not the point) and she was respected.
But would she have been respected if they knew about the appointments? Would she still have been the respected and feared business powerhouse that she was, is, if everyone knew that she fucked men to seal a deal? Was she ever even happy to begin with!
"I was and will be once I get out of here." Aubrey whispered to herself.
She was happy. Period end of discussion. Let's move on now. Flopping back down onto her bed, Aubrey's thoughts drifted back to the conversation that started this all.
Lara lead Aubrey down the hall to Chloe's office, as usual, rambling on in her usual happy tone. Of all the damn nurses here, why did she have to be stuck with the insane on? Why did she have to have the nurse that was always smiling like she was a fucking serial killer? Why?
"So Aubrey, how are things going with you and Beca? I heard about your fight. I'm so sorry about that!" Lara prattled on. "I hope that you two made up though. I think that you two could be great friends you know. The two of you are more alike then you probably think!"
Internally Aubrey snorted at this. Her and Beca similar in any way? Yeah right, that was like comparing a lion to a fucking pig. Nothing in common. AT ALL. However, Aubrey kept these thoughts to herself and instead opted to just continue walking and ignore Lara. Like her father told her, there are lesser people in this world Aubrey, remember that. Posens are above them, and we must act as such.
"Alright here we are!" Lara chirped when they reached Chloe office. Like for serious, she chirped. Her voice was all high and happy and she even waved her arms a bit.
"Thank you for escorting me here." Aubrey said politely, hoping that Lara would take that as her cue to leave.
"No problem!" Lara said happily, still not leaving "That's my job you know. But I can't complain. It pays the bills and I get to talk to lovely people like you."
"mmm" Aubrey said, a tight smile on her lips. Did this women not realize that she had already completed her job, and that she should go find out what she was needed for next?
"Oh, yeah, you need to get to your session, and I need to get back to work!" Lara said, as though she could read Aubrey's mind. "See ya later!"
With a sigh of relief, Aubrey politely knocked on the door to Chloe's office, and waited until she heard the muffled 'come in' before she stepped into the room.
"Good Afternoon Chloe." Aubrey said.
"Hey Aubrey." Chloe said "You wanna take your seat and then we can get this started?"
Immediately, Aubrey knew that something was wrong. Chloe wasn't her usual happy self, and for once she didn't (playfully) scold Aubrey for always being so formal.
"Very well." Aubrey said, slowly taking her seat.
What the hell could have been wrong though? She's been taking all her medications without complaint, she's hasn't had a single fight with any of the other patients, and she'd even spoken during group. No less, she offered to take charge of their stupid a capella concert! Shit, that must have been it. She'd been to forward-
"Aubrey, before you freak out, this isn't really bad." Chloe said, breaking Aubrey out of her thoughts. "Well, it sort of is, but its also also not. Weeeeeell, I don't know exactly. It IS bad actually. But its also good, because-"
"Chloe." Aubrey said sharply, cutting her off. "If you could please just tell me what is happening, it would be most appreciated."
"Aubrey, how do you feel about your father?" Chloe asked suddenly.
"Excuse me?" Aubrey asked, shocked.
Where the hell did that come from. First, Chloe's babbling on about something being bad but not bad, and now she's asking about her father? What even?
"I asked how you feel about your father." Chloe said simply "I know this is a very touchy subject for you but-"
"Exactly." Aubrey snapped. "You know this is a touchy subject, so why do you bring this up? I'd rather not talk about him."
"Aubrey" Chloe said sternly "This is very important. I know that your father did some bad things-"
"My father was a good man." Aubrey growled. "He was an excellent father and he believed in only the best for his children. I would suggest that you not speak ill of him in my presence."
"Shit." Chloe swore, a troubled look on her face.
"Language Doctor." Aubrey corrected. "Its-
"Unprofessional, yeah, I know" Chloe snapped.
What the hell? Chloe's snapping at Aubrey? Chloe, miss happy go lucky, sings in the rain looks angry? What the hell?
"I'm sorry Chloe." Aubrey said quickly. "I didn't mean to offend you. I was simply raised in a house where we were told-"
"No, no, no" Chloe said apologetically, "I wasn't mad at you. Its just been a crazy week, and yeah. No worries."
"No, I offer my most sincere apologies." Aubrey said. "It is not my place to correct you. You are a superior and you certainly know what you are doing. I should not be questioning-"
"But you should be." Chloe said "And I'm soooooo not your superior. Remember Bree, we're all equals here. I really shouldn't be cursing, you're right. It IS unprofessional, and I should try and avoid cursing while I'm working."
Aubrey's mind was reeling. No one ever apologized to her. Well, no one who she originally placed above herself. To top it all off, Chloe also said that Aubrey was right. Aubrey was right. Her father always scolded her for doing things wrong, and being rude, but here she was, being in the right for correcting a superior. But Chloe just said that she wasn't her superior. However, logic would dictate that she was. after all, Aubrey was a patient, and Chloe was a highly respected member of both the medical and psychiatric community. But still, she just-
"Aubrey, are you alright?" Chloe asked concerned.
Excuse me?" Aubrey asked, shaken out of her reverie.
"Are you alright?" Chloe said slowly. "You looked like you were thinking about something troubling or something."
"No, no, all is well" Aubrey said, shaking off the weird feeling she had. "So what was it that you needed to talk about?"
"Right..." Chloe said, suddenly apprehensive. "See the thing is, well, actually, you know how it is... I, umm-"
"Chloe." Aubrey said sharply, though not meanly. "Please just tell me. What is going on?"
"Aubrey, I've looked over your case, and as I've analyzed your current behavior and your past, I believe that your current mental state may be worse then originally thought." Chloe said quickly.
"What?" Aubrey asked, stunned. Her current state was worse then actually thought? What the hell? What did that mean?
"Aubrey, there's a lot more going on with you then we originally though." Chloe said gently. "I don't know if you even realize it, but-"
"Nothing's wrong with me." Aubrey growled, suddenly angry. "I'm here because of a court ordered stay. Nothing more. I do not belong here. I belong in an office running my father's, now my, business. Not in some damn nut house!"
"Aubrey..." Chloe said, at a loss for words.
"Don't!" Aubrey snarled. "You don't fucking know what you're talking about. I'm fine! I don't need to be here!"
"BUT YOU DO!" Chloe roared. "ITS NOT FAIR, AND EVERYTHING THAT'S WRONG WITH YOU RIGHT NOW IS BECAUSE OF YOUR GOD DAMN FATHER! I WANT TO HELP YOU AUBREY, BUT RIGHT NOW, YOU'RE NOT LETTING ME. NOW PLEASE SIT DOWN SO I CAN TRY!"
Suddenly, Aubrey felt her anger drain away, and in its place, the all too familiar hollowness replacing it. Slumping down into her chair, Aubrey sat down, defeated. Oh the irony. Here she was, the great Aubrey Posen, leader of the business world, one of the most successful women in the world, slumped in a chair defeated. Oh the fucking irony.
"Aubrey..." Chloe said gently. "Please, look at me."
Aubrey didn't move, here eyes trained down into her lap.
"Aubrey." Chloe said gently, "I know that this is hard for you, but please, I'm here to help. The new problems that are arising, I think we caught them early enough that we can stop them before they become serious. Aubrey, look at me."
Something about the pleading tone in Chloe's voice made Aubrey look up. However, just because she moved her head doesn't mean that she was looking at Chloe. Once again, Aubrey's eyes were dead.
"Aubrey," Chloe said firmly. "You need to snap out of this. You were making such good progress, and now news of a few... complications is going to be enough to send you back to square one? Please Aubrey, look at me! This really isn't as bad as you probably think."
While Chloe was talking, Aubrey was waging an internal war. Part of her wanted to just brush this news off. The famous Posen pride (stubbornness really) wanted to refuse that this was even happening, that Chloe was just some shrink that wanted to see more problems then there really were. The logical side of her knew that Chloe was a highly trained professional, and then if she said something was wrong, that something could seriously be wrong. Through all of this, she was trying to figure out if she was even worth fighting for. Honestly, all Aubrey wanted to do was give up right now. She was fuck up. Woo hoo. La dee fucking da. She was broken, and there was no use for broken things in this world. So why was she still fighting? Because you're worth fighting for! a small voice said in her head. Was she though? She was a corporate whore who let her daddy control her life.
"But you're not anymore." Chloe said quietly.
Aubrey looked up, , was she saying that stuff aloud.
"Aubrey, you're an amazing, wonderful, smart, innovative, beautiful, woman. You sure as shit are worth fighting for. Whatever insecurities that you have, you shouldn't! Aubrey, you're absolutely incredible, and whoever put these doubt into your head is an ass hole, and they deserve to fucking burn in hell. No scratch that. Hell's too god for them. They deserve to go somewhere worse then hell."
"First, cursing is unprofessional." Aubrey said, with a small smile. "Second, I do not believe that there is a place worse then hell."
Here, Chloe laughed, like a full on belly laugh. Chloe's entire face turned as red as her hair, and she nearly fell off of her chair.
"Yeah Bree." Chloe said once she calmed down "Sorry about that. So are you going to be alright?"
"That remains to be seen." Aubrey said seriously. "What new issues have arisen."
"Yeah." Chloe said, once again serious. "Aubrey, I'm afraid that you're beginning to show the signs of a multi personality disorder."
"Like Patricia?" Aubrey asked.
"Sort of." Chloe said "Not quite as extreme though. I think that you consciousness is splitting and creating something like your father in your mind."
"Pardon?" Aubrey asked, confused.
"See, all you're life, you've had your father telling you what to do, right?" Chloe asked. When Aubrey nodded, she continued "Well, compounded on what you went through, your umm... suicide attempt, and now such a life change, I believe that you're creating your father's voice in your head if you can understand that."
"Like my father's voice in now my conscious?" Aubrey asked
"Exactly!" Chloe said. "And this can create a bunch of problems, considering that your father wasn't the most, erm... encouraging of people."
"Understood." Aubrey said, finding her resolve once again returning. "What do I have to do now then?"
After that, Aubrey and Chloe talked a bit more, Chloe completely unaware of Aubrey's current state of mental distress.
mental distress Aubrey scoffed at herself. What the hell had she been reduced to? Lost in her own thoughts, she didn't hear Beca come in until she heard the bed squeak as Beca plopped down.
"God, I fucking hate shrinks!" Beca said, to no one in particular.
"Language Rebecca" Aubrey chided gently "Also I would say that is is mist unfortunate that you dislike psychiatrists, considering that you-"
"First of all, NEVER call me Rebecca ever again. Ever. Second, shut the fuck up!" Beca groaned, shoving her face into a pillow."Do you ever not talk like you're some god damn robot? I mean seriously! Would it kill you to use words that actual people use."
"Very well." Aubrey said. "Though i do not understand why you don't like your given name."
"Because its fucking stupid!" Beca said, her voice muffled from the pillow. And could you please speak English? I don't even fucking know what you're saying half the time."
"Unfortunately, I don not believe that I quite understand what you mean" Aubrey said apologetically. "Every word that I use is-"
"Fucking annoying." Beca said, cutting Aubrey off. How rude.
"Language, Beca" Aubrey sighed. "Now, is there a particular reason that you were so disgruntled when you came in?"
"What?" Beca said, face scrunched up in confusion. "In English please."
"That was English" Aubrey said, amused
"Then use words that you'd use around little kids!" Beca exclaimed.
"So you wish for me to talk to you as though you are a child?" Aubrey asked, doing her best to avoid laughing.
"NO!" Beca said. "Sort of. Kinda, no! Not at all. Just use smaller words!"
"Very well" Aubrey said, smirking. "I was asking about your current emotional state."
"Can't you just say, how are you!" Beca huffed.
"How are you?" Aubrey said cheekily.
"Fucking fantastic now that you're speaking English" Beca said, voice dripping with sarcasm.
"Language Beca." Aubrey said.
"Standard English" Beca said.
"For serious Beca?" Aubrey asked, though honestly, she found their banter to be quite amusing.
"Yup." Beca said, popping the p.
"Very well" Aubrey said. However, her expression soon turned serious. "Though are you going to tell me what is wrong?"
Rather then answer, Beca just sigh and walked over to her desk with her music equipment.
"Its nothing." Beca finally said, though her tone would imply otherwise.
"Obviously it is not just 'nothing'." Aubrey said, rolling her eyes at the smaller girls dramatics. "So do you want to tell me what's wrong or are you just going to mope?"
"Its nothing, alright? Just drop it" Beca growled. "Mind your own damn business."
"As I just stated, its obviously nothing." Aubrey said "I am only trying to help-"
"Why do you care anyway?" Beca snapped, cutting Aubrey off.
For once Aubrey was at a loss for words. Why did she care? Beca was just her, rather annoying, alternative, messy roommate. Why did she care? Why was she pushing this issue when clearly Beca didn't want to talk about it?
"I'm sorry." Aubrey said after a moment. "I over stepping my boundaries, and I should have dropped the subject after you made it obvious that you did not wish to speak about it."
"Yeah... um 's alright." Beca said awkwardly.
With that said, Aubrey turned around and pulled one of her textbooks down at random and then began studying. When it became evident that Aubrey was done talking to her, Beca then too turned around and began mixing, songs, or whatever it was that she did on her laptop.
All should have gone back to normal, however, Aubrey couldn't help but wonder, why did she care? Why did she push something when she shouldn't have? Shaking the weird feeling off, Aubrey simply began studying.
However, soon she found that she was barely even comprehending the words on the page. All of the events of the day, compounded onto the recent conversation had left Aubrey's mind far to occupied to even consider thinking about anything other then the recent events.
But there shouldn't have been anything to think about. She wasn't suppose to be here in the first place! And now, she actually cared about the reasons for Beca's issues? What the hell? She may not HATE the hobbit, but she most certainly didn't care for her... Did she? No, no she didn't. Not at all.
For serious, she needed to get her shit together.