"Why aren't you partying?" Doofenshmirtz asked.
Perry was sitting in a chair by the exit. All of the other agents were running around.
Carrie had her head in the chocolate fountain. Darren had filled some balloons with pudding and was throwing them at an unsuspecting Devon.
Katie the kangaroo was putting the new recruits in her pouch to see how many could fit at one time. Kyle the kangaroo was cheering her on.
"I don't like parties, remember?" Perry chattered.
"My couch parties harder than you." Doofenshmirtz said.
"I never heard 'party' as a verb before." Perry sipped at his lemonade. At least there wasn't any confetti.
"Come watch!" Clara the chicken said, coming over to Perry. "Someone dared Peter the panda to eat all the hot dogs! So far he's eaten sixty-three! He only has four left to go!"
"Tempting, but no thanks." Perry muttered. He looked down into his cup.
"This is YOUR celebration." Clara reminded him. "You ought to be having more fun than anyone today."
"I don't like parties."
"Then why did you throw one?"
"Because I wanted to see if I could learn to like them. I can't."
Doofenshmirtz turned on the boombox.
"I'm Lindana and I wanna have fun!" It sang.
"LOVE this song!" Darren said, starting to dance.
Monogram stepped onto the stage that had been set up and banged on the microphone. "Attention! Attention please! Uh, Dr. Doofenshmirtz, would you switch the radio off for a moment?"
"No."
"Please?"
"No."
"Uh… okay then. Well, Agent P, as of today, has been with us at least four years."
The Lindana song blared in the background.
Monogram spoke closer to the microphone so he could be heard. "He came to us as a stray, and was very difficult to train, but now he's one of our best field agents. I can't remember a failed mission. I can remember a failed driver's test, though."
A few of the agents laughed. Perry scowled.
"Anyway, I am very glad he's here, and I think he deserves a round of applause."
The agents all clapped, and Perry blushed.
Doofenshmirtz clapped extra slowly.
The Lindana song continued to play.
The agents went back to what they had been doing before. Perry watched as Katie attempted to stick a puppy into her full pouch and failed.
"Six new recruits fit!" Cheered Kyle. "Yay Katie!"
"I DID IT!" Peter the panda said, walking past Perry. He looked very chubby. "Hey, Perry, why don't you invite Pal over here? He's the life of every party! Remember at the Halloween party when he started that paint fight?"
Perry smiled a little. "He's with his mom."
"Drag her over here, too. Pal's fun!"
Perry shook his head. "Fine. But don't eat up all of the refreshments while my back's turned." He pulled out his phone and dialed Palmer's number.
"You have reached Palmer. Leave a message or BEAT IT! Kay. Here comes the beep."
Perry hung up and punched the number in again. He'd told Palmer at least eighty times to keep his phone on in case he needed to reach him.
After another failed attempt, he called Poppy.
"This phone is not on." His phone told him.
"YOU'RE not on." Perry retorted. He slammed the phone against his hand and redialed the number.
"This phone is not on."
Perry stuck his phone back into his fur pocket and shoved past Doofenshmirtz to get to the exit. Something was wrong.
It wasn't too much farther to the garage with the seven-legged pony drawn on the front.
Perry knocked on the pony's head.
When there was no response, he shoved the door open. It hadn't been latched.
Furniture was thrown all over the room. A lamp lay broken on the windowsill.
Slowly Perry approached the teal creature lying prone on the floor.
"Poppy?" He put his hand on her back.
She was breathing.
"You okay?" He asked.
No response.
"Gosh, nothing's answering me today." Perry rolled her over and tried to pick her up. "Don't tell me. You ate a huge statue of the world's heaviest man."
He tried to walk, but couldn't quite find the energy. He put Poppy back down, grabbed her by the arms, and proceeded to drag her outside.
Once they were there, he sat down to rest.
"Wake up." He gave her a nudge with his foot. "This a new thing with you? Turn off your phone, trash your house and fall asleep?"
Perry hated the fact that he felt he had to joke around with an unconscious animal. She wouldn't be able to sense his fear if she couldn't even open her eyes.
Perry pulled out his phone again and called Monogram. "Pick up, pick up, pick up." He chanted.
"Yes? What is it, Agent P? Why aren't you at your party?"
Perry held his videophone over Poppy so Monogram could see.
"Great googly-moogly! What happened? Never mind that. Carl and I will be right over."
"What happened?" Pinky asked.
"Rogue probably got her." Perry said. They were sitting outside of the O.W.C.A medical wing. "Couldn't have been Dennis, he's locked away somewhere, but most likely some rogue wanted to avenge him."
"And where's Palmer?"
"Who knows. Hopefully the kid ran off."
Monogram came out of the room. "Pinky, could we be alone for a moment?"
Perry nodded and started to walk away.
"No no, Agent P. Pinky's the one who needs to leave us alone."
Perry stopped. Pinky got up and left the wing.
"She's in a coma. We're not sure when she's going to wake up, but until then, we can't really be sure what happened."
Perry shrugged.
"What we're assuming, though, is that the rogues are still after Palmer."
Perry's heart stopped. Of COURSE. Why hadn't he thought of that? Of course the rogues were after Palmer. Poppy had probably been trying to protect him.
Had she failed?
"I'd hate to have anything like this happen again." Monogram said. "It's dangerous for her, for one thing, but it's also a huge danger to the agency, having such a powerful agent that can't protect himself just yet. We may need to look into… well… having you fixed. Just to be safe."
Perry didn't respond.
"I know we should have originally done it earlier, but you had that shoe removed from your stomach when you were little. I didn't think we needed to push it."
"Where do you think Palmer is?"
Monogram was unable to translate Perry's chattering. "It's not a for sure thing, Agent P. Give me some time to think about it. Right now I have to prepare for another attack. Seems the rogue agents are starting to plan again."
He left.
Perry sat down on the floor. He hated every one of those rogues. Those evil thugs didn't care a lick about Palmer. All they wanted was his potential power.
Power which the kid had hardly even harnessed.
"Why aren't you at your party?"
Perry looked up wearily at Doofenshmirtz, then back down at the ground.
"Everyone's having a blast, but YOU aren't even there. You ARE allowed at the party, you know. The only reason you didn't get an invitation is because you're hosting the thing." Doofenshmirtz sat down next to Perry.
"I called too late. I should have called earlier."
"I know you totally hate parties, I get that. Remember when I threw you that surprise party on your third birthday? You totally flipped. You hid underneath my couch and wouldn't come out. Then you smashed my face in the cake. Good times, right, Perry?"
"I could have saved them. Both of them. I just… I feel like I have to give them space, like I can't just call them up. I never really was that close to either of them. I know Palmer less than I know Pinky."
"Yeah. Good times. Anyway, why don't you get up there? I don't speak animal, but I can tell the other agents miss ya."
Perry lay his head on Doofenshmirtz's lap. "I wasn't there for Pal when he needed me. He's gone. It's all my fault."
Doofenshmirtz froze. He wasn't used to Perry leaning on him like that.
Awkwardly, he patted Perry on the back.
"I didn't know." Perry whispered. "I should have known."
The ceiling shook. A loud crash sounded from above, along with the sounds of animals cheering. A Tiny Cowboy song started faintly playing.
The party seemed to be doing quite well on its own.
Doofenshmirtz kept his mouth closed and continued to stroke his nemesis.
That was all Perry really needed at the moment.
The agents all sat in a circle, the party carnage in the middle.
Everything had crashed down to the ground when Edie the elephant had joined Peter's "Who Can Jump The Highest" contest.
"Where's Perry?" Asked Peter.
"He's downstairs, I think. Doofenshmirtz went down to check." Clara said.
"He is downstairs." Pinky said quietly. "There was an accident. Poppy was hurt."
"How badly?" Devon asked.
"Well, I just saw her for a second. She looked asleep with only a few bruises."
"What about Palmer?" Asked Peter.
"Perry's not sure."
"Poor guy." Devon looked down at his lap. "And at the first party where he almost enjoyed himself."
"He hates parties, though." Carrie the cat said.
"He was smiling. I saw him smile today." Darren picked up a piece of cake off the floor and bit into it. "He also watched me chug lemonade."
"He didn't watch me eat all those hot dogs." Peter said sadly.
Agent B, a large bulldog, burst into the room.
"Sorry to interrupt the celebration. Monogram has just located a rogue hideout. We need to get moving."
The animal agents all stood up and followed him.
Poppy shook Perry awake.
Perry sat up. He'd slept outside of the medical room all night. Embarrassed, he quickly stood up and saluted.
"They took him." Poppy said.
"Huh?"
"You have to help me get him back. They came in yesterday. Threatened me. I told them they could forget it, they weren't getting him. Then we fought… Dennis came in… that's all I remember. We have to find him!"
"Dennis?" Perry stared at her. "Dennis is back?"
"YES! We have to get Palmer." Poppy's eyes were watering. "I don't know where he is. We just have to find him."
"Did Monogram give him a microchip after he hatched?"
"Yes, but that's not going to work. The rogues aren't going to think he's a lost child that needs to be returned…"
Perry yanked out his pad and pressed a few buttons. "He's in Danville Alley. There's an underground area that we can get to through a manhole near the pet store."
"The microchip has a tracking device?"
"What agency are YOU from? Come on, let's go get him."