DISCLAIMER:: do not own. just borrowing for the purpose of creative expression. not profit obtained.

A/N:: so i have been waiting to post this chapter for a while. it was one of the first three written for this fic, along with chapters 39 and 53, and those first three are some of my favourite chapters i think, can't really say since i haven't written everything yet. hope you enjoy reading this, it's kinda the turning point when things get just slightly less angsty, or at least that's the hope, but sometimes the muse has other plans. also might be in the market for a beta of my own. don't need one so much for the technical stuff (grammar etc) but might be nice to have a sounding board for ideas, cause lord knows all my mind is filled with these days is swanqueen ideas. looking forward to any reviews. much love to all my readers. you are all the best.

WARNING:: this chapter contains sexual situations that for some might border on sadistic. if you are uncomfortable with these themes, please do not read this chapter. reader discretion is advised.

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-Chapter 23: Pleasure That Made You Cry-

"Hey kid, you ready to go?"

Henry gripped his backpacks shoulder straps and nodded, heading for her car as had become their new routine.

"Good morning Miss Swan."

Emma turned to look at the mayor on the stoop, grinning at her like the cat that caught the canary. "Madam Mayor."

"Did you make it home safely last night?"

Emma narrowed her eyes. She couldn't tell if the mayor was mocking her, though knowing her she was, or if she was truly inquiring. "Yea, I did."

Regina nodded. "Maybe, over dinner Sunday night, you can tell me all the things you wanted to last night."

"Um, I think I have plans with August."

"You think?"

Emma shrugged. "He didn't tell me what time. It's just Sunday."

"Are you in a relationship with Mr. Booth then? Because I'm not sure I'm comfortable with you bringing a man into Henry's life without my permission. Especially since he has no place of permanent residence here, no job, and therefore, no reason to stay. What if Henry got attached and then he just decided to go back to whatever rock he crawled out from under?"

"A relationship? God, no, we're... we dated once, a very long time ago. I just like spending time with him. August and I would never work, I mean... he's not you." Her eyes grew wide as she realized what she'd just said, the confession she'd just uttered into the tension filled space between them. "I mean..."

"It's quite alright Miss Swan. I think I know what you mean. Perhaps another time then on dinner. I'll check my schedule and get back to you."

Emma was left to stare after the mayor as she disappeared back into her house and shut the front door.

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Emma strolled into work sans her usual morning coffee. She didn't need it this morning. She'd had a conversation with this Regina that hadn't ended in verbal bloodshed and she'd also got to the first safe haven on the road in the other world. Things could be better in both worlds, of course, but they could also be, and had been in the recent past, a whole hell of a lot worse. So she had decided when she woke up to take pride in the small victories while they lasted.

"You seem extra chipper this morning." Graham raised an eyebrow.

"I had a talk with the mayor this morning that didn't involve nuclear warfare."

"Does that mean I still have Saturday morning rendezvous duty tomorrow?"

Emma nodded. "Unfortunately for you, yes. I have no need of unexpected ambush time. So, good luck with that." She patted his arm patronizingly, and returned back to the police reports on her desk.

Graham raised an eyebrow but turned back to his office. "So, you're giving up just because she gave you a little leeway with Henry?"

Emma shrugged, not looking up from her reports. "I'm giving her a small break before I launch my next attack. She's earned that much."

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"Mid day coffee run?" Ruby raised an eyebrow as Emma leaned against the counter.

"Have my routines become that predictable already?"

"Pretty much." The waitress shrugged. "But don't worry, it's kind of hard not to fall into routine in this place. Everyone does."

For a reason she couldn't quite figure out and although they were not meant to, the younger woman's words upset her. She didn't want to just fall in line like all the trapped souls here. She was supposed to liberate them, not get trapped under the same spell they were.

The bell tinkled over the door and the prickling of the fine hairs on the back of her neck told her who it was without even having to turn around and check.

"I need a coffee to go. Quickly." The woman came to a stop beside her.

"Good afternoon Madam Mayor."

"Miss Swan." Regina regarded her appraisingly. "It's actually fortunate I ran into you here. I was going to call the station as soon as I got back to my office."

"What can I help you with?"

For some reason the question seemed to please the brunette and she smirked. "I would like you to come by my office this evening around six. Just some things I'd like to go over with you."

Emma shrugged. She knew there'd be hell to pay if she refused, and really, what else did she have to do? "I'll be there."

"Wonderful." She grabbed the coffee as Ruby handed it to her across the counter. "I'll see you then Miss Swan."

Ruby placed two cups in front of Emma. "What'd she want?"

Emma shrugged and looked toward the door that the mayor had slipped through just moments before. "Apparently we're scheduling my torture sessions now." She grabbed the cups and moved away from the counter, holding them up in salute. "Thanks for the coffee Rubes."

Ruby shrugged. "Looks like you're going to need it."

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Emma knocked on the door, mentally preparing herself for a fight. That's how it had been with Regina these past two weeks. World War III had come to Storybrooke and it was a bloody battle fought by the mayor and the deputy. Everyone was taking sides, and Emma had little doubt that she'd win this.

The door opened, revealing a smiling Regina. It wasn't her usual fake smile, but a predatory one. Her grin said 'I have the upper hand now' and Emma wondered what she could possibly have dragged up about her now that had given the brunette the confidence boost. "Ah, Miss Swan, come in. I've been expecting you."

Emma entered the mayor's office and watched as the woman shut and locked the door behind her. That was odd. Why lock it? It's not like she could trap her here. All she had to do to escape was turn the lock to unlocked and she'd be free. Not very practical if the mayor was intending on doing something to her.

"So, may I ask what's so important that you dragged me down here after hours?"

Regina walked around to stand before her. "I realized this morning that we may have gotten off on the wrong foot Miss Swan."

"Understatement of the year, but please continue, I'm dying to know more." Emma rolled her eyes.

"If your amicable to it Miss Swan, I'd like to turn over a new leaf. Maybe we could…benefit from each other's expertise?"

Emma chuckled. "And what do you think you could possibly have that I might want? Henry? I thought we agreed he was off limits as a bargaining chip."

"Oh, he is dear. But I have something else you want."

Emma lifted her eyebrows, warning her to continue before the blonde got tired of the runaround and left.

"Me."

Emma shivered, closing her eyes. "I don't know what you mean."

She heard the punctuating tap of heels on the floor as Regina approached. She smelled the faint but intoxicating aroma of apples and felt hot breath on her ear. "I see the way you look at me Miss Swan. You covet what you cannot have. Unless of course, I feel generous enough to give it to you."

Emma couldn't move. She was frozen in place, a slave to her body's agonizing desires.

"Miss Swan?"

"Hmm?" She still had yet to open her eyes.

"I'm feeling very generous right now." Soft lips touched Emma's neck and she couldn't stop the small gasp that escaped her mouth involuntarily. She felt the brunette smirk against her skin.

"We're going to play a game Miss Swan. Would you like that?"

Emma felt herself nodding even though her head was screaming at her to get out while she still could. It occurred to her then that the lock hadn't been meant to keep her in, it'd been meant to keep other people out.

"This game," Regina placed another molten kiss on her neck, "is called Regina Says. All you have to do is do whatever Regina says. Understand?" She nibbled on Emma's pulse point, eliciting another gasp.

Emma nodded once again. "Mm hmm."

"Good." Regina pulled her mouth away. "Regina says take off your jacket and your shirt."

Emma opened her eyes. Slowly, she obliged, removing her jacket and letting it fall to the floor, then she pulled her tank top up over her head and let it join her jacket on the floor.

Regina's eyes roamed hungrily over her exposed flesh. She reached out, her hand burning a trail of fire across the blonde's bare skin. She reached around Emma, her fingers unclasping the blonde's bra with an almost precision skill. The bra joined the growing pile of clothes. Regina reached out and raked her fingers across the blonde's bare chest before dipping her head and closing her mouth over one of Emma's nipples. She lavished it with attention before switching sides, mindful of the other peak begging for attention. Finally she pulled away. Regina may have initiated this believing she had complete control, but she was starting to realize this might have been a bigger undertaking than she'd anticipated. The blonde tasted so good, so…right.

"Regina says get on the couch."

Emma stumbled over to the spacious couch and fell upon it. Regina followed at a more languid pace. She pushed the blonde down into the cushion. She unzipped her jeans and pulled them down and off, taking her boots with them. Her ruined underwear followed shortly after until she was left gloriously bare to Regina's hungry gaze. The brunette curiously didn't straddle her as she expected, but instead sat down next to her.

"Regina says open your legs."

Emma, always fearless, especially in the bedroom, obliged. Regina's hand slid up her inner thigh until it met her heat. Emma arched involuntarily at the contact.

"My my Miss Swan, you're so wet."

In response, Emma thrust down against her palm, urging her to give more contact.

Regina smirked. "Eager, are we? All in good time, my dear." She thrust two fingers into Emma's entrance without warning, causing a sharp intake of breath from the blonde. Emma whimpered and continued to impale herself on the brunette's fingers. Without preamble Regina added a third finger. Emma didn't object; she couldn't even form a coherent thought.

She felt herself building, coming dangerously close to the edge. "I'm coming Regina." And then it all stopped when Regina's fingers slipped from her and nails found her clit, squeezing inward and effectively pinching off all the nerve endings. Emma cried out. It wasn't painful, just a shock. Like spending an hour in the hot tub and then jumping into the pool.

"Don't you dare," Regina whispered through clenched teeth. "I never said Regina Says. You don't get off until I say you can get off. Do you understand me?" Her eyes burned dark and hot. She was aroused, Emma could tell.

Emma could do nothing but nod in the face of Regina's warning. The pinched nerves between her legs was starting to border on uncomfortable and she was desperate for the brunette's hand to let go. And Emma realized this was to be her punishment for August. Regina had wanted her all along. Emma going on the date with August had displeased her.

"Good girl." Regina released her clit and finally crawled over her, straddling her open legs. Looking down into Emma's eyes, the mayor once again thrust into her savagely.

Emma held Regina's gaze, trying to find something, some small thing to hold on to. If she could just find that small tether of her soul, the jagged edges where she'd been separated from the Regina in the Enchanted Forest, the Regina that Emma loved with every piece of herself, then maybe she'd be able to stand living in this world forever. She just needed that small glimpse of hope. But before she could find it, she felt her body start to clench around Regina's fingers once more, reacting involuntarily to the mayor's ministrations.

Anger crossed Regina's face and she once again pulled out, pinching off the nerves once more. This time it stung, causing a throbbing soreness to spread between Emma's legs. A few tears slid from her eyes and she struggled against it, but it only made the burning pain worse.

"I thought I told you no! Now, are you going to behave or are we going to have to stop playing?"

Emma nodded, her breath shaky. "I'll behave."

Regina released her, giving no pause before thrusting back into her. This time, Emma kept all her focus on controlling her body's reactions. She lasted through several minutes of the mayor fucking her with abandon before she couldn't manage any longer. She raced towards the edge, almost praying that she could get off before Regina even knew what was happening. But the mayor must have been anticipating her body's weakness because she slipped out of her, her fingers once again wrapping around the blonde's clit and squeezing it off.

This time pain surged through her, a sweet agony, and the blonde let out a choked sob. "Please, Regina, please. It hurts. I need to. Please. I'll do anything." She couldn't stop the words any more than she had been able to stop her body's reaction to Regina's thrusts.

The brunette smirked, releasing her, and entering her one final time. She leaned down, painting the blonde's collarbone with her tongue as she began to thrust. "Regina says come for me."

And Emma did. Hard. It was a wave of intense pleasure fringed with a sweet pain from the bruised nerves in her clit. She moaned Regina's name several times over, grateful that the brunette had thought to send her secretary home for the evening. She didn't want anyone overhearing how wanton she sounded in this moment of release.

She lay panting, Regina blazing a trail of hot kisses, from her navel up to her neck. And then the woman's face was hanging inches from hers, staring at her lips, her intent clear. But at the last moment before she dipped down to capture them, her eyes met Emma's.

And Emma saw it. The fringes of her humanity, buried deep, but pulled to the surface for this brief moment. She saw her Regina and it made her want to cry out for a completely different reason. Maybe she could make them whole again, maybe she could actually have the best of both worlds.

"Tell me you love me."

The words were so soft, the barest hint of a whisper as they left Regina's mouth. The vulnerability had yet to leave her gaze. Her eyes pleaded with Emma. She needed to hear the blonde say those words. Her body was trembling slightly.

Emma stared deep into chocolate brown, deep down to the part of this Regina that she needed to hold on to. "I love you."

For a moment, a brief pause in time between them, that was enough.

Then the mask fell back into place and Regina's soulless glare returned. She drew away from the blonde. "I didn't say Regina Says Miss Swan. Game over. You can see yourself out." She stormed back over to her desk and fell into her seat, turning her eyes back to the paperwork she had yet to finish.

Emma glanced over at the woman. Slowly, she stood, reaching down and retrieving her jeans and pulling them on. She grabbed her boots and pulled them on too. She stood, walking over to the pile of discarded clothes, scooping them up. She grabbed her bra, clasping it behind her as she stared at the woman behind the desk who was effectively treating the situation as if she no longer existed. She pulled on her tank top. "If you think this means I'm going to tell you what I know Madam Mayor, you are very sorely mistaken."

Regina's gaze shifted up from her paperwork and she managed a look of surprise. "Oh, deputy, you're still here?" A smirk crossed her features.

Emma wished it didn't sting, but it did. She knew for certain in that moment that, just as with the other Regina, she was without a doubt in love with this one as well. She pulled her jacket on and tight around her as if it might somehow protect her from the knowledge. She studied Regina's face, searching for what she had seen earlier. And she couldn't find anything.

Regina sighed, appearing bored in the silence, and started to turn her gaze back to her paperwork.

"I meant it." She turned towards the door, not wanting to see the emptiness in those brown eyes at this moment when her heart was vulnerable. "I love you. I wish I didn't… but I do." She shrugged at the hopelessness of trying to hide from love and left the office without another word.

And Regina stared after her, feeling the gaping tear Emma's words had just gouged in her armour.