Shane finished reading the article, scowled, and tossed the newspaper aside. The pages separated as they fell off the edge of the desk.
"Sorry, Shane." Roman . . . No, John - it's John - looked sympathetically across the desk. "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I figured you should see it."
Nodding, Shane said, "I appreciate it. I just wish I knew about it before Eve left this morning. I could've prepared her. Stopped her from doing anything rash."
"I hope that reporter has a bodyguard," John said with a laugh, but he stopped when he caught Shane's look.
This was no laughing matter. Eve was just starting her life, and now the entire world knew about her past. She did not deserve that pain.
Shane just shook his head, then sighed. "I guess I can't do anything about it, can I? When your kids get old-" He broke off suddenly. "Damn, John, I'm sorry."
"It's okay," John said. "I understand. It's hard for everyone to suddenly realize I'm not really Roman."
It had been three days since the DNA results had come back, and it was still a shock to everyone. John had spent large parts of the past two days at Shane's, seemingly one of the only places he felt comfortable, though he always left before Kim returned from work.
"It's weird." John ran a hand through his hair. "Everyone's acting nice, but that's just making me feel even weirder."
"Are you saying I shouldn't act nice?"
John rolled his eyes. "You don't count. I meant the Bradys. The ones I've come across . . . they act real nice, but it's like when you're a kid and you're forced to be polite to grown-ups, you know?."
"I'm not sure I do," Shane said. "I was polite because I was terrified of my nanny. If we did anything rude around grown-ups, we'd be cutting a switch from one of the trees in the yard."
"It must have worked," John said. "The nanny must have beat it out of you."
Shane chuckled. "I actually think cutting the switch was the worst part of the punishment. You had to go find just the right branch to use and, the whole time, you were imagining the spanking. The worst was when you couldn't find a decent branch on the willow tree. That meant using the ash tree. My backside's hurting just thinking about it." He let John laugh a little, before speaking again. "But I think I understand. It's like they're being polite because they don't know how to act. But it comes across as distant."
"That's it exactly," Roman said. "It's like I'm suddenly an outsider and they don't know me."
Shane knew exactly what Roman meant. When he had been forced to reveal that he kept Roman's survival a secret from the Bradys, his treatment had been very similar. "I know how that can feel, but I assure you things will get better." To turn the subject away from the Bradys, Shane asked, "How's Marlena doing?"
John shuffled awkwardly. "I've kind of been keeping my distance. She's already so confused and with Roman always there and not trusting me, I figure it's better to lie low. I did see Isabella last night."
"And?"
"She's trying to be supportive, give a sympathetic ear and all that." John sighed. "I guess it's good to have someone in my corner. She and you are the only ones who don't treat me like some stranger who'll go psycho at any minute."
Shaking his head, Shane said, "You're probably the most sane man I know - that little adventure on Stefano's island aside. If I'd had to go through what you've went through . . . even if it were just the last few years . . . well, let me just say I think you're doing remarkably well in the sanity department."
"Don't sell yourself short, partner. You've been through a hell of a lot too."
Too true. Sometimes Shane had to wonder how they managed, but he had a thought about that. "John. . . ."
"What?"
Shane looked down at the photo of his family on the edge of the desk. "I was thinking about when I had amnesia and how important it was that I had someone I could trust amidst all that uncertainty. Even if I didn't know if I loved Kim, I could see her love for me and it helped me through." Looking up, he stared John in the eye. "I think Isabella could do that for you."
"I think it's best for everyone that I don't involve Isabella," John said. "What would Roman think about my running to Isabella?"
"Who the bloody hell cares what Roman thinks?" Shane shot back. "Look . . . before the tests came back, you weren't even sure how you felt about Marlena. Was it that you felt guilty and responsible or was it that you truly loved her? And now you can't really know how much of that love was because of whatever was implanted in your head."
"But you're saying that I fell in love with Isabella," John said matter-of-factly.
Shane nodded. John was getting the point. "No matter what else has happened, you know that's real. That was all you."
John sighed. "And what will that get her? I'm off the police force, so I don't have a job. Hell, I don't even really have a place to live anymore."
It pained Shane to see his friend agonizing like this. "I wish I could help more," he said. "Maybe if I was still in the ISA, I could get to the bottom of this."
"You've got more important stuff to worry about," John said. "I'll just have to figure it out."
"There's one thing you don't have to figure out." Shane looked John in the eye. "Isabella loves you and that kind of love can help you, if you let it. Her love can be something you can hold on to."
John looked away and seemed to think a minute, before he looked back across the desk. "Maybe you're right, partner. But if that's true, why isn't it the case with you now? Why isn't it the same with you and Kim?"