DISCLAIMER:: do not own. just borrowing for purpose of creative expression. no profit obtained.
A/N:: here is the big one, part 2, the one everyone has been waiting for. will regina realise what she's feeling in time? we shall see. but know that she is about to get properly fucked. emma did not enjoy being denied. thank you to all who continue to add this story to their alerts/favourites and those who take a moment to review. this journey would be nothing without all of you. i would hug each and every one of you if i could. enjoy and review.
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-Chapter 54: I'll Keep A Part Of You With Me Part 2-
Regina picked her way carefully across the grassy soil of the graveyard, working her way cautiously around the headstones towards the mausoleum at its heart. She stood before it, staring up at the stone structure that supposedly housed her father's body. He was here of course, but not in the stone sarcophagus like everyone assumed he was, but underground, as was everything else she had brought from the old world to this one.
She climbed the steps and pushed inside, closing the door behind herself. She didn't think anyone would be in the graveyard today, but her privacy was too important to risk someone stumbling upon the open door of the mausoleum and deciding to investigate. Most of the townspeople were still partying at City Hall; she had left Graham in charge of keeping order. She had dropped Henry, Emma, and Mary Margaret off at the schoolteacher's flat, quickly bowing out on the opening of gifts, stating she still had to get things ready for dinner. In truth, dinner would take very little time at all. It left plenty of time to stop here to retrieve Emma's gift.
She pushed aside the hollow stone sarcophagus and descended down the staircase into the darkness. She emerged in the torchlit underground corridor. She glanced first left and then to the right. To her left the sound of thousands of heartbeats called out to her. She ignored them and turned to the right, turning down three more matching corridors until she came to the correct door. She stepped into the room. The only thing in it was a marble podium in its center, a glass case resting on top of its flat surface. Under the glass sat the box.
She stepped up to the podium, lifting the glass and grabbing the small box. She took the note card, looking yellowed around the edges with age, and pocketed it. She replaced the glass before turning and leaving the room, clutching the small box to her heart. It had taken her until last night as she slept, when she'd finally recalled her only memory that had anything to do with the blonde, to remember the small box she'd found on her fainting couch.
She'd traced the signature of the magic later that night, just to be sure, but all tracing spells had labeled her as the caster. It had been a time transverse spell, so the only thing she could infer was that the woman who had left it had either been her past self or her future self. Considering the next day she had cast the curse and come to Storybrooke and the woman had obviously been of Enchanted Forest stock, she had decided that she must be from the past, a failsafe to remind the Evil Queen of Emma's existence, a last ditch effort to make her remember what was important.
As she found herself back in the main corridor heading for the stairs up, she stared down to where it ended at her vault of hearts. She was burning to know why she hadn't been with Emma when she cast the dark curse. She had seen the look in her eyes in the image in the hand mirror Emma had gotten from Gold; she saw the look in the blonde's eyes every time Emma looked at her. She saw in Emma's eyes that the woman knew her, on a deeper level than what they'd learned about each other over the past month. This memory, and this box, were the evidence that Emma had been telling the truth, all month long. She heard the beating of her stolen hearts and for the first time in twenty eight years, she wished she had left them in the Enchanted Forest. They were of no use to her here, gave her none of the control they did there. She had brought them here as souvenirs to her time of power, a reminder of her greatness. But she no longer felt great; she felt tired, exhausted really.
She turned and went up the stairs. There was still so much she needed to recall, blanks that Miss Swan needed to fill in for her, but one thing was for certain. After that memory, her confirmation that she had known Emma, had loved her once upon a time, she couldn't let her leave tomorrow. She had to find a way to make Emma stay. She looked at the box in her hands, hoping it would be enough to do just that.
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Emma sat amidst a graveyard of wrapping paper and bows. Behind her was a stack, a mini mountain really, of gifts. If she put together all her birthday gifts for the first twenty seven birthdays in this world, it still wouldn't equate to even half of the pile behind her. "Well that's the last of it."
Henry shook his head. "There's one more."
Emma glanced around, tossing aside discarded wrapping paper, looking for the elusive last gift. "I don't see it."
Henry plopped down on the couch. "That's cause my mom has it. It's her present for you. She said she was going to pick it up for you on her way home."
Emma regarded him with a raised eyebrow. Regina had dropped her and Henry back at Mary Margaret's flat after the party and continued home to finish preparations for the birthday dinner they'd agreed to have as a family. "Well then I suppose it's time we take all this stuff upstairs and then go home and see what it is."
Henry shook his head. "Miss Blanchard and I are having dinner at Granny's and then Ruby's coming over for movie night."
Emma glanced at her son. "I thought you were having dinner with your mother and me?"
Mary Margaret piped up from her place in the kitchen. "We thought it might be better to let you two have a night alone."
Emma shot her shocked gaze to the schoolteacher.
Mary Margaret grinned. "Happy Birthday Emma."
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She twirled the key around her fingers. She had traded out her heels for more practical flats and her borrowed trench coat had been returned to its rightful owner in favour of her red leather jacket. She had walked over to the mayor's house to give herself time to mentally and emotionally prepare for what was to come. Tomorrow would change everything. This key was going to open the door to the last night of her life as she had been living it for the past twenty eight years.
She closed her fingers around the key, clutching it so tightly that, when she opened her hand again, the outline of the key was impressed into her skin. She willed herself to take one step, then another and another. Finally, what seemed far too quickly, she was staring at the shiny gold 108. She looked at the key one last time before sticking it in the lock and turning it. The lock clicked free. She stared down at it in shock for a brief moment, only now realising that a part of her had expected it to not work, that this had all been some joke. But the key worked. She stepped inside. "Regina?" She pulled her key free, closing the door behind her and locking the deadbolt.
"In the kitchen."
Emma followed the voice to the kitchen, noting the candlelit dining room table with two place settings as she passed it. So the mayor had known about Mary Margaret and Henry's plans for the evening in advance; she must have been in on it too. It surprised her to know that her mother, her lover, and her son had managed to plan this whole day behind her back and she hadn't even suspected a thing. Regina was waiting for her with a bottle of wine and two glasses.
"You're early. I was planning on being in something slightly more… revealing by the time you arrived." She was still in Emma's jeans and the silk shirt, now with a blazer to ward off the slight chill in the air of the evening. "You do love to spoil my plans Miss Swan." She appeared stern but her eyes and her tone were teasing. She set about opening the wine and pouring some into their glasses. She handed one to Emma.
The blonde accepted the glass and took a grateful sip. It was a good vintage, smooth, but it did little to calm her nerves or make her feel better. "What's for dinner?"
"Angel hair pasta, lightly dressed. But before we get to that, I have a present for you." She set down her own wine glass and then grabbed Emma's glass, putting it beside hers. She grasped Emma's hand and led her back to the foyer. "Wait here."
Regina disappeared quickly up the stairs.
Emma heard a door open and close and then some muffled shuffling. Finally the door opened and closed once more. She watched as Regina came back down the stairs just as slowly, something clutched in her hand. When she reached the bottom step, she saw it was a small box, even smaller than the one that had contained the key. It was wood, carved with sunbursts, beautiful craftsmanship for something so small. It was in impeccable condition, but there was something old about it too, antique almost. And yet it seemed familiar, as if she'd seen it before, though she couldn't decide from where.
Regina wouldn't meet her eyes. Finally, almost reluctantly, she handed it over.
Emma ran her thumb over the lid of the small box for a moment. She took a deep breath and opened it. The air left her lungs in one fell swoop. She'd seen this before but not in this world. Her mind flashed back to the moment Queen Regina had snapped her fingers and caused it to appear out of thin air. Emma traced her finger over the small locket, the memory of the brunette putting it around her neck still fresh in her senses. She set the box carefully aside on the table below the foyer mirror, letting the fine chain dangle from her fingers as she gazed at the pendant resting in her palm. "How'd you get this?" There was no way she could have known about this.
Regina frowned. "It was nearly three decades ago now, before the curse. I'd found it on my couch in the other world. I had forgotten it until just this morning." She stared at the blonde's face, noting the emotion with which Emma regarded the gift. "You've seen it before?"
Emma nodded, still unable to tear her eyes away from the necklace. "It was mine once. You gave it to me, as a birthday present, my first ever from you… and my last, there."
"May I?" Regina didn't wait for an answer. She took it from Emma and stepped around behind the blonde, moving her hair aside so she could put the necklace on and clasp it. She guided Emma around to face the round mirror on the foyer wall and they both stood in front of it, Regina's face hovering just over Emma's shoulder.
Emma touched the charm and closed her eyes; she could feel her there, under her fingers. It was the barest hint of feeling in a sea of a billion sensations, but she was there. Emma could feel her. Tears slipped from her eyes and down her cheeks.
"Miss Swan?"
"You have just given me something more precious than you could ever know." Emma turned and placed a kiss to Regina's forehead. Slowly she wrapped her arms around Regina and pulled her into the most honest hug either woman had experienced in this world.
The pureness of the moment unsettled Regina and all too soon, for both women, she was pulling back. "Shall we have dinner now Miss Swan?"
Emma nodded and turned for the kitchen.
Regina caught her upper arm to stop her. "No." She pulled the blonde into the dining room. She pulled out the seat at the head of the table and directed Emma into it. "Relax Miss Swan. It's your birthday." She disappeared into the kitchen, returning a few minutes later with plates of pasta and their wine glasses. After she had placed everything on the table, she took the free seat to Emma's left.
Dinner was a languid affair, broken intermittently by Emma with kisses to the back of the mayor's hand and her fingertips or so her hand could squeeze the mayor's knee under the table. Regina allowed her the little touches all with small smiles.
Finally the meal came to a close. Regina gathered the dishes, pausing to place a soft kiss to Emma's cheek before disappearing into the kitchen.
Emma grabbed their wine glasses, blowing out the candles, and followed. She set them on the counter and walked over to Regina who was rinsing the last plate.
Regina turned as she felt Emma draw close.
Emma braced her hands on the counter on either side of the mayor, effectively caging her there.
"Miss Swan…" Regina raised a questioning eyebrow as she saw the blonde's eyes fall to her lips meaningfully.
Emma leaned in closer, almost pleading. "Don't stop me now. I know you're falling for me. Your walls are breaking. Don't fight it."
Regina turned her head to rebuff Emma's advance. "Love doesn't exist here." She didn't sound angry, just defeated, as if she'd resigned herself to this impassable truth long ago.
Emma nodded, pulling away. She felt it all slipping away. "I've thought many things of you Regina, called you many names in my head and out loud in anger. But never once have I truly thought you a coward… until now." She shook her head and turned for the door, for an escape from her failure. "Don't worry." She tried unsuccessfully to keep the emotion from her voice. "We have all the time in the world now. Take as much as you need."
"Emma… I don't want to hurt you. Why do we have to define this? Can't we stay here where we are? I like where we are." It's safe, that went unsaid.
Emma couldn't turn around. She couldn't let Regina see how much this was destroying her. She refused to use her pain to get her way. If Regina wanted her, it couldn't be from guilt. She refused to use that to manipulate the mayor's emotions.
"Emma, come upstairs with me."
Emma hesitated, and her pause gave way to the click of heels and she knew what was coming, yet she couldn't bring herself to run from it. Arms slipped around her, dragging her back into a tight embrace.
"Come upstairs." Regina moved aside the blonde's hair and pressed a soft kiss to the tender flesh of her neck. "Let me wish you Happy Birthday properly." One of the hands around her waist started to sink lower and then slipped under the hem of her dress, sliding back up the inside of her thigh.
She grabbed the wrist before the hand was able to find its way high enough to feel how wet she was and pulled it back out of her dress. Finally she turned. She met Regina's eyes and willed herself not to cry before grasping the hand that had just been trying to invade her. The blonde headed straight for the stairs, pulling the more than willing mayor behind her. When they reached the second floor Emma made a beeline for the mayor's bedroom. She pulled Regina in, releasing her hand and closing the door softly behind them. She leaned her forehead against it a moment as she took a deep breath to steel her nerves. Then she turned to face Regina.
The mayor reached for the top button of her own silk blouse, though she still had yet to remove her blazer.
Emma stopped her with a hand over hers, stilling her movements. "Let me. It's my birthday. Let me unwrap my present."
Regina nodded and dropped her hand, sensing that Emma needed this.
Emma grabbed the collar of Regina's blazer and slowly pushed it off her shoulders and down her arms. It fell with a rustle of fabric to the ground. She pulled the tucked in silk shirt from the waist of her pants. She undid the brunette's jeans, her jeans, and they slid off down her legs. Regina stepped out of them and kicked them aside. Emma ran her hands possessively over the brunette's hips and up over the silk of the button up blouse. She undid the buttons one by one from the bottom up with agonizing slowness until the soft fabric completely parted and was knocked off lean shoulders to fall soundlessly onto the growing pile of discarded clothes. Emma ran her fingers over the black lace covering Regina's chest with an almost reverence. Slowly she reached around behind the brunette until that barrier too was gone. Her fingers caressed the flesh that had just been uncovered with the same reverence. This body was one she had explored several times before in the other world and the familiarity quelled any nervous hesitation left in her. She stepped back from the brunette, shrugging off her jacket. She peeled her dress up and off, tossing it aside. She kicked off her flats and removed her lingerie before she grabbed Regina's hands. She led Regina to the bed, reached down, and hooked her fingers through the black lace between the mayor's legs, sliding down the final piece of cloth blocking her from unrestricted access to the brunette's body. Once that had been tossed aside, she took a moment to stare at the brunette before her, not with lust (though there was copious amounts of that in her system), but with a look of pure love.
Regina sat down on the edge of the bed and regarded the blonde through lust filled eyes that were somehow much softer than Emma had ever seen from the mayor before. It occurred to Emma that she was trying, fighting her own internal battle to let down her walls. It was already too late. It wouldn't be enough. But, for this Regina, it was a huge step. She'd made a lot of those lately, so much progress in such a short time, and all for Emma's benefit. It had been too much to expect her to save the world. Emma had once promised herself that she would never wish her decision on anyone else, no one should have to carry the weight of the world on their shoulders, much less the weight of two worlds. Yet Emma had broken that promise. She had just expected Regina to save them all, when that had never been her role, nor her responsibility. She fell to her knees in front of the brunette.
Regina reached down and brushed some wayward strands of blonde hair behind her ear.
Emma managed a smile. She placed a soft kiss on each of the mayor's bare knees and then softly pushed them apart. She could see Regina's need pooling at her centre, the aroma of it dizzying Emma's senses for a brief moment before she was able to collect herself. She kissed her way with deliberate slowness from the mayor's right knee, up towards the apex, skipping over it once she got there, and kissing back down the left thigh until she reached the opposite knee.
Regina rocked forward a little in quiet frustration. "Emma, I need you."
Emma smiled, her hands gliding up the outside of powerful legs until they latched firmly onto the woman's hips. She gripped them tightly as she brought her mouth to where Regina needed it most, placing gentle kisses on slick folds before finally giving the length of the older woman one strong lick.
Regina once again rocked forward, this time into her mouth, silently begging the blonde for more contact.
The blonde used her shoulders to nudge the other woman's legs even further apart before leaning in and pushing her tongue inside the brunette, not deep, just enough to tease her. Her right hand slipped down the curve of a hip and down to Regina's inner thigh, where it waited in the wings until Emma decided she had need of it. She dragged her tongue up to the hard bundle of nerves, swirling her tongue around it but avoiding direct contact.
"Emma, please, make me co…Ohhhh." She was cut off by her own moan as Emma pushed two fingers into her without preamble, her tongue still continuing to tease at her clit.
Emma paused for a brief moment, savoring the feel of the hot walls surrounding her fingers. She hadn't realised it would feel so good to get this, to finally earn the mayor spread out and craving her touch. If this was all she was ever going to get, she might as well relish the experience. She removed her fingers almost completely before thrusting them back in, eliciting a sweetly sharp moan from Regina. She quickly found a steady rhythmic pace as her tongue continued to swirl teasingly around the brunette's clit without touching it. It was making the apex of her thighs become sticky and slick with her own need to hear the frustrated whimpers coming from Regina. After several minutes of guiding her to the edge but not letting her tumble over, she took pity on the panting brunette and sucked the engorged bundle of nerves into her mouth, painting it with the sweet possessiveness of her tongue.
Regina's eyes slammed shut, her lips parting as the blonde's name tumbled from them in a whisper of ecstasy as she came. Her head fell back on her shoulders, a smile crossing her features. It was unintentionally obvious that she hadn't felt this good in quite some time.
Not quite yet ready to relinquish her power, Emma got up off her knees. She helped the mayor to move her body up the bed to rest her head on the pillows, her body stretched out. She draped her body over Regina's, positioning herself over her on all fours.
Emma grasped her chin, her eyes flashing down to Regina's parted lips, looking at them with such longing that Regina was sure she'd kiss her. But Emma used her firm grip on her chin to turn her head forcefully to the side, pressing her cheek down into the pillow and exposing the long column of her neck, which the blonde immediately began to nip and suck at. Her movements contained a desperate hunger, a lust driven brutality, a punishment for the month she'd been denied. The heat that rippled underneath her skin, an invisible fire that was consuming her from the inside out, made Regina question why she had thought it in her best interests to refuse the blonde for so long. Certainly there could be nothing conceivably better than this moment. She hadn't realised how much she'd truly been denying herself; the craving she'd been suppressing and ignoring was so potent that it threatened to unravel her. She wanted Emma to sink into her, not just into the source of her desire, that space between her thighs, but into her entire being. She wanted Emma's soul, this thing, this connection the blonde claimed they once had in a different world. She wanted that here. The feel of Emma's body against hers rang against something long buried inside her and in that moment, Regina Mills realised she wanted to love Emma, more than she'd wanted anything in a very long time. "Kiss me Emma."
Emma's head snapped up. She regarded Regina with cautious eyes, certain this was some kind of trick. She decided the brunette had been messing with her; she leaned back down and bit Regina's pulse point in retaliation. Her tongue traced the line of Regina's collarbone, dipping into the hollow at the base of the mayor's throat. Her right hand ghosted down the planes of the brunette's stomach, moving slowly southward.
"Emma… kiss me." Regina rolled her hips, silently begging the hand to keep moving closer. She was already so wet again, wanting the blonde buried deep inside her.
Once again Emma's eyes raised to regard Regina. Her hand was just inches above Regina's wetness.
Regina stared up into Emma's suspicious green eyes. She reached up and stroked the tip of a finger down Emma's cheek. "Kiss me."
Emma's fingers slid between Regina's pliant thighs.
Regina's eyes slipped shut, her lips parting in a whimper.
Emma leaned in, her mouth hovering inches above Regina's, their laboured breaths mingling together. She slid one of her fingers teasingly up and down Regina's length.
Regina forced her eyes open to find Emma's face drifting inches above hers. Her lips tingled; they wanted the soft promise of the blonde's mouth.
Emma knew better than to ask Regina if she loved her. It was too much to ask, too much to expect. She shouldn't do this, shouldn't kiss her, not like this. But what did she have to lose?
Regina watched as, inch by inch, Emma's lips descended to hers. She took a deep breath a second before they made contact. Warmth suffused her system, radiating out to her body from her lips, searing through every vein as it shot to even the darkest corners of her soul, illuminating the blackness. For a moment, the shock of feeling, truly feeling, rendered her immobile. All that changed however as Emma's exploring fingers thrust inside. She released a low moan into the blonde's mouth. Suddenly not content with being subservient, she nipped at the blonde's lower lip, aggressively deepening their kiss as her arms wrapped around Emma, her nails scratching down the creamy flesh of the blonde's back. Her hips rocked against Emma's fingers.
Emma smirked against the brunette's lips, thrusting hard and fast to meet the brunette's gyrations. She couldn't bring herself to break the kiss. She'd finally been given unrestricted access to both Regina's mouth and her body; Emma was not going to give that up without a fight. Finally, she broke the kiss, but kept her mouth close, within capturing distance. Her breathing was coming hard, sweat rolling down her back between her shoulder blades at the exertion of slamming into the brunette.
Regina's second orgasm hit with barely any warning at all. "Emma!" The brunette cried out her name, louder than the first time but no less passionately. She tangled her hands in blonde locks, directing the mouth above hers back down to hers, kissing Emma sloppily. Finally her head dropped back down to the pillow.
Emma rolled off the brunette. She hadn't nearly had her fill of the woman, but she knew she needed to give the mayor a moment to catch her breath. Her own sex throbbed achingly, practically begging her to guide the mayor's hand, or even her own, down to it, to ease its desperate ache. But she fought against the urge; it was going to have to wait.
Regina's head turned in her direction and Emma was surprised when she managed a predatory smile and rolled up to straddle the blonde's hips, placing herself dangerously close to the blonde's need.
Were this any other time, any other day, Emma would let Regina take over from there. But this wasn't any other day. It was her day. So when Regina looked as if she was going to make a move, Emma gripped the brunette's hips, dragging them up her torso. Regina, noticing what Emma was trying to accomplish, crawled forward until her knees were on either side of the blonde's head. Emma's fingers dug into the flesh of the brunette's hips, directing her centre down to her mouth. All it took was one lick to savour the taste before she buried her tongue deeply into the brunette.
"Oh Emmmaaaaaa." The end of the blonde's name was slurred as Regina placed her hands back on the bed on either side of the blonde's torso, locking her elbows so she could put her weight against her arms. She rocked into Emma's mouth, her own head falling back on her shoulders. Graham had never been this good, never felt like this, no one had.
The whole thing was having an effect on Emma's own core that made it impossible to feel completely comfortable. For every moan of abandon from Regina, Emma felt her own centre clench painfully. But it was worth it to taste the spicy essence of the woman coating her tongue, hear her various sounds as they emitted from her throat, see her head thrown back in pleasure. She had been working towards this very moment from the night she'd arrived in Storybrooke, the night she'd first met and made physical contact with Mayor Mills. Something had passed between them that night, something that had always been leading them here.
"Oh God Emma."
Emma had abandoned the mayor's entrance to suck on her clit, hard. She held Regina's hips as still as she could as she used lips, teeth, and tongue on the hard bundle of nerves. With one last hard suck, Regina's third orgasm of the night struck with a ferocity neither woman quite expected.
Regina was frozen, pressed against Emma's hot mouth as aftershock after aftershock hit. She didn't yet trust her arms not to collapse if she tried to move. Finally after the blood stopped pounding in her ears, she fell down beside Emma, resting her head against the blonde's shoulder.
After several minutes, when hearts and breathing had slowed down to a normal pace, Emma reclined on an elbow, looking down at the sensitised and spent body beside her. Her own core continued to throb, but she knew the satisfaction of her own release would never compare to watching Regina come undone. She ran her fingertips possessively over the brunette's face, reminding herself that she hadn't lost everything, this Regina still remained. Though it didn't feel the void in her heart completely, at least she got to keep a piece, a half of the woman she loved. "I really do love you."
Regina, for once, didn't tense. She reached up, pushing a few stray strands of hair behind Emma's ear before leaning up and kissing her gently. When she pulled away to look into Emma's eyes, her brown depths were filled with genuine apology. "You want so much from me." She sighed, her head dropping back to the mattress. "I'm afraid you ask too much. You must know by now that I care for you, deeply. But love… is there even such a thing here? I will ruin you dear, and I'm not sure I can handle that."
Emma nodded silently. The war had been lost. It was time to lay down her arms and retire the battlefield. "I know. Don't say I never tried." She shrugged sadly before pulling Regina into a tight hug. She placed a soft kiss on the nape of the mayor's neck. Her legs pinched against her unaddressed arousal and she winced.
As if sensing her body's desperation, Regina's hand slid slowly down the blonde's torso.
Emma trapped the hand under her own, stopping its progress.
Regina pulled back enough to look at her, her brow furrowing, just slightly, in confusion. "But it's your birthday."
Emma brought the hand she had stopped up to her lips and kissed it softly before slipping her fingers between the brunette's. "Are you happy?"
Regina looked at their intertwined fingers, a small smile gracing her face; she nodded.
Emma leaned down and kissed the brunette gently. "That's the best birthday present I could ever ask for."
Regina's eyes flashed briefly with something Emma didn't catch before the brunette rolled onto her side and curled her body against Emma's, both women noting how they fit together perfectly. She yawned deeply. "One day." The words were a whispered promise, but a promise of what, Emma had no idea. She couldn't ask Regina to elaborate, couldn't bring herself to ruin the moment with pointless talking. Regina kissed Emma's shoulder and closed her eyes. It didn't take more than a minute for her to drift off.
Only then, in the silent symphony of the mayor's breathing, did Emma Swan let the tears come.
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It was dim on the ground level of the mansion. The tall candles that adorned the surface of the dining table as they'd had dinner had been blown out immediately following the meal but she knew where Regina kept the matches. She went to the side table and retrieved the box, striking one and lighting the nearest candle. She carried her light source to the parlour. It's not as if she truly needed it; she could find the cider decanter without help but something about the small glow and the spicy apple aroma the melting wax produced was comforting. She set down the candle and poured herself a drink before taking it and the candle across the foyer and into the great room. She walked to the back windows, opening the curtains. It was dark outside, but even in the blackness she could make out the silhouette of the apple tree. She traced its outline with her eyes even as she sipped the nectar of its fruit from her glass.
She hadn't been able to bring herself to go to sleep, not when she knew she wouldn't wake up in the Enchanted Forest. This was her life now. She was stuck here in Storybrooke and even though that idea wasn't quite as daunting as it had been a month or even a week ago, it was still bittersweet. For every gain in her life, there always seemed to be the requirement of a sacrifice. But hadn't she sacrificed enough? Wasn't it time for her to get what she wanted? Just this once, couldn't she win?
Savya. Snow. James….Regina. They were gone now, people only real in her memory. How long would it take her to start forgetting? Twenty years down the road would she still remember the moment she'd awoken Regina from her slumber? Would she remember her childhood home or the way her father used to place her upon his shoulders and walk down to the edge where the land met the sea? He had always promised to take her across it one day, to the far away lands on the other side. They'd never have that chance now.
She turned from the window as the first drops of rain hit the glass. The piano was just before her. If she closed her eyes she could just picture Queen Regina sitting at one, in a different room, in a different world. She smiled to herself even as the tears slipped once more from her eyes.
The bench was cold as she sat on it. She didn't have the sheet music but as she set the glass down on the bench beside her and her left hand found the locket around her neck, she realised she no longer needed it. The memory was strong and her fingers slipped easily over the keys, putting music to the falling of her tears. The rain pattered outside, a thundering backbeat to the melody she played.
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The bed was empty when she awakened. The sheets beside her had already gone cold. Emma was gone. She had left. Regina was hardly surprised but unpleasantly disappointed. Why should she care? Wasn't this what she had wanted from the moment the blonde had shown up on her doorstep with their son? Their son. It was remarkable the little changes that had occurred in her since Emma had arrived. As much as the blonde had the ability to infuriate her, she also was starting to realise that Emma Swan also brought out the very best in her. All she had been before she'd found herself thrust into the role of villain she saw reflected back in Emma's green eyes. She was the first person to look at Regina and see beyond what everyone else saw. She saw the woman not the deeds. How could she do that? How could she look into Regina's eyes and see straight down to her very soul?
And then there was the always prevalent question of why she couldn't remember her. There was no longer any doubt in Regina's mind that she had known Emma in the Enchanted Forest. She had seen the other night in the mirror… and that memory from her past this morning. She had known Emma, had loved her once upon a time. They fit together so well. But why couldn't she remember her? Had it been to protect the blonde, or herself? Either way, Emma came here to this world, with all her memories, knowing exactly who Regina had been and all she had done; she could easily have just gone on with her life, knowing Regina would never remember her. She could have laid their past to rest, started over, but she hadn't. She had come here to Storybrooke, saw that she hadn't yet changed her ways, and she still wanted her anyway. She still loved her just as much as she once had.
She felt her heart clench painfully. Emma was gone. She'd made it clear to the blonde yesterday that she thought she should go. What if she truly had? What if she had left Storybrooke for good, as Regina had suggested? Henry would hate her. She hated herself. What had she done? Had she just thrown away the only person who could possibly make her happy?
As if in response to her question, she heard music. It was a song she recognised, a song long buried in her memories. She got up from the bed, grabbing Emma's jeans and sliding them on. Her silk shirt was not among the clothes on the floor; Emma must have it. She saw Emma's overnight bag still on her vanity chair. She unzipped it and grabbed the first shirt she saw, a loose fitting band t-shirt covered in small holes from several years of wear. She held it to her nose, surrounding herself with the scent of Emma. She pulled it on and exited the room. She crept down the stairs, her bare feet making no sound at all. The song was descending towards its conclusion as she reached the ground floor.
Emma was at the piano, her fingers drifting across the keys with a practised familiarity. Regina could see the tears glinting in the candle light on the white of the keys. Emma had been crying; it was possible she still was. The brunette felt her heart clench once more, urging her to correct the situation, to make the blonde smile again. But how could she when she was the reason for the tears in the first place?
She sensed Regina's presence but couldn't bring herself to stop. Stopping would mean she'd have to turn and turning would certainly let Regina see the carnage her tears had ravaged across her face. But the song had an end and she reached it all too quickly for her liking. She picked up her half full glass and brought it to her lips. She didn't notice how bad her hand was trembling until she opened her mouth to drink. She took a quick gulp and held the glass in both hands in her lap. "What are you doing up?"
"I could ask you the same thing." When Emma wasn't forthcoming, Regina continued. "My sheets became cold."
Emma managed a small smile but she hid it behind the tumbler as she took another gulp of her drink. She set the glass down on the top of the piano and looked up to see that the mayor had once again pulled on her jeans and had thrown on her favourite old band t-shirt. She looked so sexy in the blonde's clothes, her normally perfect hair mussed from sex and sleep. Emma turned back to the keys, trying to quell the desire pooling in her stomach. "I'm sorry. I couldn't sleep and I didn't want to wake you."
Regina came over and sat down next to Emma on the bench. She reached over and grabbed Emma's glass, still a quarter full, and downed the rest with a throwback of her head. She set the empty glass down, taking a deep breath. Her eyes watched as the rain hit the window and then trailed down the glass outside, casting the edges of the rose bushes just outside to an indistinct blur. "Will you be leaving Storybrooke Miss Swan?" She dreaded the confirmation she knew was coming. What if her chance had passed?
Emma shook her head, her own eyes staring at the rain on the window. "No. I'm quite sure I couldn't leave, even if I wanted to."
Regina glanced at her in surprise, her eyes vulnerable. "Why?"
Emma felt the tears once again sting her eyes, tumbling from the corners in a waterfall of betrayal, metaphorically exposing her throat to the one person who could cut it. "Because I know, with time, I could survive you not being able to love me back, and I also know, with certainty, that I can never survive not seeing her… your face again." She closed her eyes, willing the tears to stop. "You're all I have left of that world, and even though you can't remember what we had together, you are her and she is you." Emma stood. "I am in love with the Evil Queen, and you are the only part of her that remains. Where else exists for me now?" She walked out of the room. This was too much. It was all too much.
Her feet carried her through the dining room and down the corridor to the back door. She unlatched it and stepped out into the tears falling from the eyes of the sky. The rain fell in a torrential downpour now, a constant sheet that seemed unstoppable. It soaked through the silk shirt, slicked down her bare legs, pasted her hair to the sides of her face. She wasn't quite sure what made her come out here, maybe she was hoping it would wash it all away, the pain, the disappointment, just wash it all out of her system.
She gripped the locket in her hand, wanting desperately to know that she'd get the other world back, that she'd get to hold her once again. She was supposed to be the saviour. Why couldn't she have them both? She loved them both. The Mayor and the Queen. The Dark and the Light. She loved them both.
"Emma."
She could barely hear the name being called from her place beneath the apple tree. She turned, finding the rain so thick that she could barely make out the brunette's body, framed by the halo of light in the doorway from the kitchen corridor. But somehow, she could see her eyes crystal clear. And she saw something in them that made her heart stop. It couldn't be.
For a moment, they stared across the space between them, only some thirty feet but somehow it seemed greater. It was both a physical and an emotional distance, each tangible in both their minds, the distance that separated them both vast and diminutive all at once. Neither of them moved, Regina still afraid of showing weakness and Emma not willing to be the only one giving herself over anymore.
And then… Regina moved, launching herself from the safety of the house and into the downpour. She ran barefoot across the grass, her clothes soaking through before she'd even made it halfway to the blonde. She threw herself the last few feet and slammed into Emma, throwing her arms around the blonde's neck. "Stay with me." It was barely a whisper into Emma's ear. "Don't leave me. I love you."
The second the words left her lips, Regina realised the depth of that truth. She was in love with Emma Swan. She could love. She was still capable of it. Emma, and Henry, they were proof of that. "I love you." She said it again, stronger this time.
Emma pulled their mouths together, her head swimming, flashing between images of Queen Regina and Regina Mills like a movie on fast forward. Her arms drew the brunette closer and, in response, she felt the brunette smile genuinely against her lips.
Regina's hands tangled in fabric at Emma's torso. She dragged them back towards the safety of the house. The second they stepped into the kitchen corridor, the brunette was pulling off her ruined silk shirt from Emma's body. It fell to the floor with a wet plop. She shimmied out of the wet jeans and pulled the t-shirt off over her head, never letting their lips part for more than two seconds. And then she was dragging Emma through the house, their ice cold skin bumping as they blindly shuffled to the stairs and then up them. They ran into walls here and there as they fumbled back into the master suite, ignoring the bed in favour of the en suite bathroom.
Emma turned the shower on, turning up the hot water, as Regina crouched down behind her to remove her saturated underwear, kissing the backs of her thighs and then back up over the rounded curve of her ass and slowly up the trail of her spine. She pushed aside limp wet locks to kiss the back of her neck. Her arms slid around Emma and over the blonde's stiff cold breasts. Emma lifted her hands to press down over the ones on her breasts, holding them there, luxuriating in how they brought warmth back to her skin.
She finally broke away and stepped into the shower, pulling Regina with her. Their flesh slapped together as they crashed against the shower wall, attached at the mouth.
Emma pulled her mouth away first. "Say it again." She sucked at the flesh of the brunette's neck.
Regina smiled, her hands sliding over the slippery skin of the blonde's torso. "I love you Emma."
Emma bit her bottom lip to suppress the grin that wanted to break across her face.
Regina pressed Emma harder against the tile wall and bent, taking a hard nipple into her mouth, sucking the peak to warm it up. Once some of the cold stiffness was gone, she moved to the other.
Emma ran her hands across the expanse of the brunette's back, dragging her fingers around, tracing muscles through her skin. Finally she put a hand to each of the brunette's cheeks and lifted her face, capturing her lips again. Regina loved her. Regina, both Reginas, loved her. She'd done what she had been destined to do. The only question now was would it be enough?
SWAN QUEEN SWAN QUEEN SWAN QUEEN
Emma's head laid over Regina's heart, tapping a finger on the brunette's stomach in time with her heartbeat. She glanced up at the woman who was reclined back against the pillows running her fingers through blonde hair. "What changed your mind?"
Regina was quiet for a long moment before she answered. "I came to this world to get my happy ending. Maybe that's you. Maybe my happy ending has always been you, in this world and the last."
SWAN QUEEN SWAN QUEEN SWAN QUEEN
A/N2:: so to balance out the lack of a new episode tonight i have bestowed upon you a happy mayor chapter. yay! enjoy it while you can because all good things must come to an end. true love was never meant to be simple.