DISCLAIMER:: do not own. just borrowing for purpose of creative expression. no profit obtained.
A/N:: thank you for the continued feedback. glad everyone is liking the story so far. i'm taking this in an... interesting direction after this chapter. hopefully everyone will still be on board. reviews are love... leave me one, won't you? enjoy.
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-Chapter 4: A Year Gone-
His children opened their mouths the second he entered the room.
"Will the Princess of Autumn truly marry the Prince of Winter Daddy?"
"That's a complicated question, but yes, she will."
His children looked slightly deflated. They were obviously pulling for true love to win in the end. In some fairytales that was so, but in darker tales, while true love does still exist, it also does not always win. And this tale was about to become darker still.
"But surely the Princesses had a plan. Right Daddy?"
He laughed. "Am I the one telling the story here, or are you? So many questions! All answers come in time. Now let's see… Ah, yes. We left the Princesses of Autumn and Winter in the Princess of Winter's bed chamber the night of the proposal. The Princess of Autumn couldn't bear to admit what her mother had threatened her with, not wanting to have her love constantly in fear for her life. But beyond that detail, she told the Princess of Winter everything about the encounter with her mother and the forced acceptance of the proposal. After the Princess of Autumn refused to agree to tell Queen Snow White, stating it was much too dangerous, the Princess of Winter thought up a plan to postpone the wedding that she hoped would give them time to get around the threats made by Queen Cora. She believed she could get her brother to push back the wedding until after her sixteenth name day. It would give them just a little over a year to find a way to beat the Queen of Autumn at her own game. And even if they were unable to prevent the wedding from happening, they both agreed they would find a way to make sure their love continued, regardless of the marriage. The Princesses went to sleep that night with hope in their hearts. But Queen Cora had other plans. You see, the Queen had no intention of keeping her end of the deal. She'd always been manipulative and this time was no different. She would make sure her daughter went through with the wedding, and after she did, she'd see the Princess of Winter killed."
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Princess Emma paced across her bed chamber. The fifteen year old royal held a gold hand mirror in her small hands, her thumbs caressing the gold absentmindedly as she watched the clock. Time always seemed to go mutually at both an agonizingly slow pace and a distressingly rapid one. Each evening as she waited for the moments they were able to spend together, through the confines of a looking glass, time seemed to drag on forever, each minute drawn out to an inexplicable length. But as a whole their time was dwindling. They had yet to come up with a solution to their problem and her name day was fast approaching. On the morrow, the Princess of Autumn would be returning to the Kingdom of Winter, for the last time as an unmarried woman. The wedding was a month away, one week after Emma's sixteenth name day. A year had passed so quickly.
At first suggestion Addword had been rather reluctant to wait so long for the wedding, especially since it was to be so close to such a big event. The sixteenth name day of any royal was a landmark day, as it signified their eligibility for marriage. A ball was expected and Emma would be holding one as well. It had been one of the points that had finally convinced Addword to relent. It would be quite troublesome to summon so many royals to his wedding and then ask them to return a year later for her sixteenth name day celebration, she had insisted to him, so why not hold them close together. That way the royals would be here for both and those who must travel farther would not be so inconvenienced. With Regina's added push he had caved and agreed to wait. Queen Cora had been rather dismayed but had grudgingly agreed when Queen Snow White and King James had sided with their children.
So the Princess of Autumn returned to her own Kingdom with her mother and exchanged constant letters with her betrothed, speaking of how she missed his presence and their approaching nuptials. And every night she appeared in Emma's hand mirror. The Princess of Winter had begun to live for these moments. They were a bright spot in the ever increasing darkness she felt.
"My Love?"
Emma jumped at the voice and then instantly relaxed, lifting the mirror. Regina was growing more beautiful every day, her dark hair, falling in impossibly long silky waves down her back, her eyes only getting darker as the years passed, her tan skin. To Emma, she was perfection, the most beautiful creature to exist or that ever could. "I've been waiting for you."
"My lessons ran late tonight my darling, I am sorry."
Emma smiled. "It is no matter of concern. I'd wait for you forever."
Regina's fingers touched the glass on her side as if she were trying to reach through and touch the blonde. After a moment they slipped back from view. "I cannot wait until the morrow when I can once again be in your arms."
"My mother says it will be alright for you to share my chambers until the wedding."
"And after?"
"You will share Addword's until you are to leave for Polar Hollow."
Regina looked away, tears brimming her eyes. "Where has our time gone? I thought we'd have this figured out by now. I don't want to lose you. And I do care for your brother; I do not wish to treat him so deceitfully."
Emma swallowed hard, trying to force down the nausea and shame that bubbled up in her throat. "The bigger betrayal is mine." She hated lying to Addword. Beyond Regina, he was her best friend. She shared so much with him and yet the biggest thing in her life she could not confess. He knew she was hiding something and she could see the hurt in his eyes every time she denied any secrets existed between them. She couldn't imagine having to do that for the rest of her days. And what would she do when the time came for Regina to bear an heir? It would surely be expected of her before her twentieth name day. A child would complicate things greatly. And there was the matter of her own marriage. She'd had nobles sniffing around her for a while and the dogs would be on the prowl at her ball. The Fates had graced Princess Emma with a soft beauty. In her 'search' for a husband it might prove a useful tool. She would receive many offers, which would allow her the easy excuse of prolonging a choice. She would claim that she had to consider each one carefully before she could make a decision. It would buy her time, but it would not buy her forever. She would be forced to marry eventually and she feared that day more than she feared Regina marrying Addword. At least their union would keep Regina close at hand. If Emma were married off to one of the eighteen Princes of Summer (the Summer royals were notorious for their ability to breed), she'd be forced to move south. Seeing Regina would once again be confined to the small handheld looking glass and Emma was unsure how her heart could take loving only a reflection.
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Her left hand played through the water that burbled forth from the fountain. It was cold, near freezing, pumped up from the stores of fresh mountain spring water beneath the palace. Her skin prickled painfully in the places it hadn't yet gone numb, but she relished the slight burn of pain. It was the only thing she could feel that seemed able to cut through the sorrow. In her right hand she clutched the rose meant for the Princess of Autumn. Collecting it was what had brought her to the garden in the first place. But she hadn't been able to resist the pull of the fountain. She had just decided to take a quick seat before she went to join her family on the steps to once more await her true love's carriage.
"You weren't there to greet me."
Emma's hand froze and it wasn't from the temperature of the water. She looked up to see Regina standing not far off, looking far older than she had a year ago. She was taller by a few inches, giving her a height advantage over Emma by a couple inches now. She seemed thinner than she had before, drawn in, though still unspeakably beautiful. Her hair was up, which meant her mother had accompanied her. When she was out of Cora's watchful and critical eye, Regina wasn't so strict with her appearance. She was in a gown of dark orange. It was new, another stipulation of her mother's no doubt. "I'm sorry my love; time must have got away from me.
Regina came closer. "It has been slipping through our fingers much too quickly lately."
Emma pulled her hand from the water and stood, trying her best to force a reassuring smile. "Let me look at you." She felt traitorous tears stinging the back of her eyes but she blinked them away. "I don't think I will ever stop being in awe of you." She reached out, her hand running across the silk of her skirts.
Regina caught the blonde's hand, pulling it up to her lips. She kissed the palm, smiling as Emma's fingers instinctively curled around her cheek, caressing the soft skin. "I have missed you my Princess of Winter."
"As I have you. Every time you leave, I swear I will not survive."
The corner of Regina's mouth lifted in a smile. "Yet you always do."
"Yes, but it is a half life, one in which I am utterly incomplete."
Regina pulled the blonde into her arms. She pressed a light kiss to the forehead of the younger Princess. "We still have time yet." But both girls heard the difference in the statement from when it was said a year ago, the startling loss of hope.
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"Where's Princess Regina?" Snow White appeared in the reflection of the vanity behind her. Her mother grabbed for her brush wordlessly and ran it soothingly through the golden silk of her hair.
Emma closed her eyes to hide the pain. "She's gone out on a picnic with Addword." Her mind flashed back to the first time she'd ever kissed the Princess of Autumn, back on a picnic of their own. Regina's lips moving over hers like velvet, stirring to life a dormant flame inside her that had glowed warmly in the pit of her stomach and then had curled down between her legs. She shook the memory away. Memories like those were dangerous, yet that would be all that was left to her in a little over a week's time. The past three weeks had been a flurry of unstoppable wedding and name day plans, dress fittings, cake tasting, dancing lessons… their only time together had been nights and they'd spent them getting lost in each other, both desperate to cling to the memory of the other's body.
"I am surprised she continues to lie to herself. She loves him not."
Emma bit her lip. "Sometimes it isn't about love."
Snow White stared at her daughter's reflection in the mirror fondly. "Oh my dear, it is always about love. It is the only commonality between every fairytale."
"Can I ask you something Mother?"
Snow White nodded. "Of course sweet one."
"Why was I never taught magic?"
The Queen sighed. "Magic is very costly Emma, often much more than it's worth. To a young mind, one that knows not of its ill effects, it seems a wondrous thing. And, it can be. It can bring beauty and light into a place once dark. But all things worth having, worth fighting for… they were not meant to be won through magic. Take you and Regina for example. Say I had taught you the magical arts and you had used a love spell on her… you have taken away her free will, so if even one day she comes to share your love on her own, without the need of the spell, you could still never remove it because if she had found out you took her choice from her, she would resent you for the rest of your days. Not to mention, you may always wonder if the love she felt was truly from her heart or a by-product of the spell. It would be a false love that would plague your heart."
"My goal is not to put a love spell on her. Why waste time fighting to get something I already possess?" She shook her head. "I don't need to fight for it. I must fight to keep it. We're trying…" She remembered her promise to Regina that she would not tell her mother of their situation.
Snow White realized her hesitation and grasped to keep her from withdrawing as she'd done several times this past year. "You can tell me Emma. What is wrong? Why did Regina refuse your proposal if she loves you? Why is she marrying Addword?"
"She didn't refuse…. It's complicated. I cannot speak of it."
"Emma…"
"Please Mother, do not ask that I break her trust."
Snow White frowned but finally nodded.
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"Who's to be your escort tonight?" Regina stroked her fingers through Emma's blonde locks as they relaxed on top of Emma's bed.
"It matters not." She nuzzled Regina's neck. She had been dismayed the previous night when the brunette had snuck into bed well past the peak of night like an unfaithful lover. She had smelled of the winterlands and Addword and Emma had turned from her, desperately willing her thoughts to believe that Regina wouldn't touch him, but not really being able to succeed at convincing herself. She had assured her she hadn't, that the horses had just gotten away from them for several hours, but still it had hurt more than Emma cared to admit. "I will be expected to dance with all the eligible noble born men, specifically the Princes throughout the night. But none of them matter. They are merely faces with which to pass the time until I'm allowed to retire for the evening. Then, I'm yours, all yours. And that, my love, is what matters."
Regina smiled. She gripped the blonde's chin and brought their lips together. "I love you Emma."
Emma nodded. "I know." She reluctantly pulled herself from the embrace. "But now, you must go get ready. As must I."
Regina pouted. "Can't I help you get ready?"
Emma smirked. "My love, if you try and help me get dressed, we'll never make it to the party." She got up from the bed.
Regina returned the smirk. "Good point. Very well my darling." She got up and placed one last kiss on the Princess' lips. "I shall see you this evening. Save a dance for me?"
Emma gripped Regina's hips, pulling her close and pressed a deeper kiss to her mouth. "Every dance is yours if you wish it."
Regina brought her hands to either side of Emma's face, her thumbs caressing slow circles across the blonde's cheeks. Emma's own hands were still clutching at the fabric of her skirts at her hips, holding her close at hand. The brunette brought her mouth to Emma's, consuming the younger Princess with a passionate kiss, a promise of all that was to come later.
A throat clearing caused both Princesses to launch back from each other.
Queen Snow White stood just inside the entry of the bed chamber. She glared disapprovingly at them both. "You're both lucky I asked the dressing servants to wait outside. If my judgment had been more lax, you would have had to answer to more than just me for your shame. Really, sweet ones, have you not heard of discretion?"
"Your Majesty. We were only…"
"I have eyes Regina; I know exactly what you were doing with my daughter. And while I agreed to support a union between you if that was the path you would choose, it is not the decision you made. What you do here with my daughter is at the expense of my son and I will not have it! I will not sacrifice his happiness for hers or hers for his. They are both my children. I once considered you much the same but you've made a right mess, playing a game of their hearts, trading one for the other as if they were gowns for you to wear only when the fancy suited you."
"Mother!" Emma's jaw dropped.
"And you… how could you do this to your brother? Has he not been good to you?"
"He knew she was mine! He's known from the beginning that she's always been mine! I introduced her to him as such!" Angry tears burned streaks down her pale flesh. "He knew she was mine and he took her anyway! He loves her not! He does what is expected of him, nothing more! Do you honestly believe he would sacrifice the crown to keep her? What would he give for her Mother, tell me, because I… I would give everything I have and all that I am! I would have people know me not as Emma, Princess of Winter, but rather as commoner Emma…" She thought to the childhood nickname her brother had for her. "Swan. Emma Swan. That is who I would be to have her."
Regina felt her eyes well with tears. Here Emma was, ready to sacrifice everything for her, and she couldn't even face up to her own mother.
"You were a child of four Emma! You thought you owned everything! Maybe it was me at fault, and your father, for always letting you believe you could have the world if it was only your will. Maybe we coddled you too much, let you control too much of our attentions. Maybe we should have been harder…"
"No!" Regina took a step forward. "I know what it is to have a hard parent, as well as no parent at all where my father is concerned. Better for Emma to think she owns the world and one day have to come to terms with the fact that she doesn't, than for her to think she is unworthy and never find the strength to believe otherwise." She looked at Snow. "She's perfect Your Majesty. You made her just perfect." Regina spared one longing glance at Emma before quitting the room in a rush.
Emma started to follow her but Snow caught her upper arm and shook her head. "No, Emma. The pain left by her father's indifference and her mother's disapproval is not something that can be healed easily. Give her space."
The blonde Princess stopped resisting, her muscles going slack as she stared sadly at the closed door. "I don't know if I'll ever survive losing her."
Snow put a finger under Emma's chin and lifted until their eyes met. "Why do you have to?"
Emma instantly looked both sad and guilty. "I am sorry Mother, but it is not my secret to tell."
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Regina could think of nothing but the disappointment on Snow White's face and the determination on Emma's. She had never felt such shame and such pride all at once. The Queen was right of course. What she and Emma were doing behind Addword's back was atrocious to say the least. He was a good man and a devoted brother. Emma may have told it true; he did not love her, not truly, but he was a good man. He had done no wrong here and he deserved more than his betrothed sneaking around whenever his back turned, and with his own sister no less. The betrayal would be sharp. She had never wanted him hurt. And despite the blonde's outburst, she knew the deception was a thorn in Emma's side too. It seems there was no way out unscathed. Someone would be hurt. She just had to decide whether it would be Emma or Addword.
"Your Grace. Prince Addword has arrived to escort you."
Regina nodded. "Thank you." She turned to her reflection in the full length mirror one last time. Her hair was down for once. Her mother would disapprove, but let her. Emma liked it this way and it was her night. Her dress was burgundy, Emma's favourite colour on her. She had the seamstresses in the Kingdom of Autumn work especially hard on this dress. It had to be perfect, for Emma.
"You look beautiful Princess, as always."
She turned to Addword. "Thank you Sire, you are kind."
"Is it kindness to merely speak the truth?"
She blushed and he took her hand. He made small talk as he led her down to the ballroom but she was only half listening. Her mind was on his sister and what she could possibly be thinking about the brunette's swift departure from her chambers.
"Presenting His Royal Highness, Prince Addword, fourth of his name, heir to Winter, and his betrothed, Her Royal Highness, Princess Regina, first of her name, heir to Autumn."
She walked in on Addword's arm, all eyes of the nobles of Winter on her. She was the exotic creature about to invade their regency in a week's time. They would no doubt watch her actions very closely over the next few days until the wedding. She saw her mother standing off with a group of official looking men. The sight of the woman who had bore her into this world suddenly made her angry. She wished her magic could rival that of the Queen of Autumn and vowed, at that moment, that one day she would make sure it did. No matter how long it took, one day, her mother would live in fear of her.
Addword immediately swept her into a dance and she let him. The person she was waiting for had yet to arrive anyway.
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"Presenting Her Royal Highness, Princess Emma, first of her name, and her name day escort, His Royal Highness, Prince Solivan, eleventh of his name."
Regina looked up. Emma was on the arm of one of the Summer Princes. He was a handsome young man of maybe seventeen. He had dark hair and a skin tone even deeper than her own, but his eyes were an endless blue. Emma herself looked breathtaking. Her dress was white, as befitted her Kingdom, and grand. Her hair was done up, a tiara made of Winter Diamonds atop her head. Prince Solivan whispered something in the blonde's ear and she granted him an easy smile. Regina felt the jealousy roil within her. How dare he touch what is hers?
As if sensing her eyes, Emma looked over and met her gaze. Her eyes flickered briefly to the man who held Regina, a look of pure regret crossing her features.
Solivan said something and Emma's attention swiveled back to the Prince.
"You love her, don't you?"
Regina's gaze shot to Addword with a look of alarm. "What do you mean?"
Addword raised an eyebrow. "She is your best friend, is she not?"
Regina nodded, relieved. "Oh yes, of course."
"You spend so much time in her company and I know you enjoy it, so I was thinking we might invite her along to live with us for a time. Polar Hollow is rather isolated, it will be an adjustment and I would like to make it as easy a transition as possible. She can stay for however long you like."
Regina felt all at once happy and guilty. "You are a good man Addword. One day, you will make a fine King."
She didn't realize his intentions until his lips were on hers. She didn't respond, but held still. She resisted the urge to flail her arms or attempt to push him off. She still looked exceedingly uncomfortable in the embrace and she was sure the whole room could tell. Everyone it seemed, except for Emma.
When he finally let her go, she turned just in time to see the blonde disappear out the entrance doors at the top of the stairs, her skirts rustling wildly in her attempt to flee the room.
"I should check on her."
Addword nodded and Regina took off after her retreating lover.
She found Emma hyperventilating, leaning against a wall and trying to catch her breath in the far corners of the ground floor west wing. She approached the blonde slowly, unsure of her mood.
"Emma, my love…"
The blonde glared at her. "You kissed him!"
"I didn't know that was his intention. I'm so sorry."
Emma shook her head, fighting back tears. "Do not apologize. It's not your fault. I just didn't know it would hurt this much." She slid down the wall, curling in on herself as the tears finally came.
Regina pulled Emma up and into her arms. "Just tell me what I can do to make the pain stop. I'll do anything."
Emma pulled back. "Tell my mother why you're afraid?"
Regina was silent for a long while, her eyes searching Emma's pleading green ones. Finally she nodded. "Anything to make you happy. I will never deny you anything again."
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Snow White stared at the two girls, hand in hand as if trying to draw strength from the other's presence.
"Your Majesty…. During my last visit to the Kingdom of Winter, that one which ended in my engagement, my mother discovered Emma and I were involved." She shifted uncomfortably.
Snow White tilted her head with a concerned frown. "What happened sweet one?"
"My mo… the Queen of Autumn told me… she told me if I refused Addword's proposal…" Regina closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She only relaxed and opened them once more after Emma had squeezed her hand in reassurance. "She threatened to see the Princess of Winter..." Regina gulped down the lump rising in her throat. "Killed. She said she'd crush her heart and bring me the ashes to remind me of my failure."
Snow White gasped and Emma paled.
Once the Queen had gotten over the initial shock, she stared intensely at Regina. "Is she capable of such things?"
Regina nodded. "I've seen her do it to servants who have displeased her. She can reach right into their chest, though flesh, muscle, and bone as if it were not there at all." She choked a little on a sob that was trying to escape. "I couldn't bear the thought of her doing that to Emma. I did the only thing I could to keep her safe."
Emma stepped up and into Regina's arms, burying her face against the older girl's neck.
Queen Snow White seemed deep in thought. "I think it's time your mother got a dose of her own potion."
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The door splintered under the blow from the heavy sword and James used his boot to kick the remains away.
Queen Cora looked up, startled. "What is the meaning of this?" She was still in her gown from the ball.
James was about to answer but Snow White pushed past him, storming up to the older Queen, fueled by her anger. "How dare you come into our Kingdom, our home, and threaten our child! If not for Regina I would see you executed for treason against the crown!"
The charade was up, there was no point for Queen Cora to fake her politeness anymore. "So that sniveling brat caved? It figures. She always was a disappointment as a daughter."
Snow's slap landed heavy and hard, snapping the older Queen's head to the side with force of impact. "You owe her your life. You will leave this Kingdom. You are henceforth banned from ever stepping foot into the Kingdom of Winter by Royal Decree. Orders will be to slaughter you on sight if you are found over the border. You will leave tonight, your guards and servants as well. I want all of you gone."
"Certainly. Just provide me with my daughter and we will be on our way."
James finally stepped forward. "You no longer have a daughter. Regina shall be a ward of this Kingdom until her eighteenth name day in three months. Then she will be free to make her own choices."
The Queen of Autumn frowned, a look of obvious distaste on her face. "When she'll undoubtedly choose that little whore you call a Princess."
The shriek that came from Queen Snow White's mouth was almost inhuman and James had just enough time to get an arm around her to hold her back as she lunged.
He motioned for the guards to come forward. "Get this monster out of our sight."
The guards rushed forward but Cora waved an arm and they were knocked back by an invisible force. "You will regret this." She looked at the younger royals. "Hear me… I will have my revenge. I will have my power and you will be left with nothing. I always get what I want." With another wave of her hand, she disappeared in a swirl of smoke.
The Queen appeared in her carriage, her belongings and her guards all in their places. Her driver looked in the door. "Back to the Kingdom of Autumn Your Majesty?"
"No you idiot. Take me to Center City."
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"What's Queen Cora going to do Daddy?"
The father, exhausted, shrugged teasingly at his children. "That is a story for tomorrow."